DrewNows

focusing on positive incentives and progress here and now. Nice ?

@assx95 heh. Yeah I’m kicking myself as I’ve spent years not even aware of these theoretical “attachment styles” which seem to make a load of sense now and definitely better than my broader view, clearing up why I fall back into certain frames of thought/fear

It’s always going to be authentic based on the emotion but you have to access your role in the interaction, it’s not so easy shifting out of an attachment style, so authenticity is changing based off what frame of reference/perception you have of the relationship, unfortunately it goes as deep as your beliefs so yeah see if you can become aware of those ?

@Leo Gura stop proselytizing...you might just change the world we must know our audience, sometimes we work with what we got ?

We mix and match but we cannot choose because we are. @Aakashto do or not to do, there is no try

@Truth Addict why do we do anything? It was a Calling. Like “hello, God?” *Silence. Whoosh, Jesus baby, yeah! ?

Ooo but who said he was ever trying to

@Aakash you shameless lion ? (I’m carefully taking notes related to courage )

Same thing but enlightenment doesn’t have a face... im teasing you because of how wreckless your behavior is on the forum, constantly labeling and explaining yourself and others... but are you being honest? Maybe that’s where you’re headed

@Aakashthis is you and the “mask of spiritual enlightenment”

Indeed and truth can be painful

Wow just realized I’ve been the dismissive avoidant ? i actually switched from fearful avoidant to dismissive avoidant, in my previous relationships @Martin123 @Natasha thanks a million for sharing the info. and video, feels really good being able to acknowledge what holds me back

What have you learned from doing a skill for at least 10k hours? Do you feel there is a truth to mastery, is it unique to the individual? How has this changed your approach to mastering other skills?

@assx95 your welcome man, if you’re interested in “self-healing” I recommend the holistic psychologist on YouTube and Instagram. Here’s one of her videos

Perhaps or it may only show you what’s in the way

Are you in a long distance relationship with her? Or are you friends? What if you could either have her or have yourself? Not both. Would you choose yourself over her? Humans will subconsciously mirror and behave a certain way simply based off how the other person is holding themselves to be, in their own eyes. When you treat others like they belong on a pedestal they start to look down on you and lose respect. You need more contemplation my friend. Whatever I share still has to be self realized for you to embody it. What sort of attitude is reflected in someone who’s detached? (Indifference) (unneedy)(high self-respect)(confidence) 3. You seek control out of fear you are powerless over her, this will always be the case in every relationship, control is illusory. So what happens if you show up as the man who truly loves himself? How would you feel, and what might you do differently? Would there be any question on whether or not you can trust yourself, your thoughts, your feelings? Would you feel more grounded? You can start to notice the place in which your thoughts are arising from, fear or love? This is all you can do, continue to learn grow and love yourself. You can ask yourself am I showing up just as fear, or do I recognize fear is only a small aspect, a limited version, of who I AM as a whole. Your true self will allow fear to happen but not allow it to consume your identity meditate and belly breathing, you are not your thoughts, not your fear

@assx95 some questions you could ask yourself/reflect on: (nothings personal) why do you need her to tell you how she feels about you? Are you insecure? Are you so caught up in sharing your feelings that you are unable to simply be present with her? Does she open up to you? Why are you so caught up in thinking about a possible future with her if it’s right now that really matters? is everything happening on her terms? If so, how does this reflect on your self respec? Whats the purpose of being detached from outcome? What kind of person would be this way? Can you objectively see the dynamic of the relationships as it is right now?

@Anna1 ? ? see you, go ahead, you can sleep or work, but, you can’t hide keep Being as you are, when life calls you can only do you booboo ?

@Anna1 breath easy annabanana. I like your eye ? and if you don’t mind, would you share what love means to you? For most of my life love was a mystery, i could tell there were different forms and understandings/ideas but it was never very clear

@Wisebaxter haha yup and it’s all in your head man. Your goal ideally would be to learn and grow through your relationships that’s why it really helps to “find yourself” or in other words, begin to see through your infatuation/lust, so that you may eventually feel complete with or without someone. I think it promotes a healthy relationship dynamic Also I’m happy for ya man, no need to be too hard on yourself, it’s a learning process and falling in love has got to be one of the most potent feelings we can experience, keep that heart open!

@Wisebaxter what I’ve read is it’s best to allow her to chase/pursue you. Purposeful calls and texts are good if you are going to make plans, but coming off too needy is not going to help. Perhaps you could talk to other women to take your mind off of her until she figures out her shit, id even recommend going on other dates to develop confidence

She has a much bigger responsibility than most might give her credit for this is funny I don’t even know who she is other than listening to some of the video ?

This is really interesting. Parents can instill it in us as well even without being directly related to sin and Christianity. What is ACIM?

Hmm well what do I mean by polarity? Left and the right views, different world views, belief systems, right and wrong, all of which make up society as a whole, perpetuated by politics today. (Sorry I’m thinking out loud haven’t watched all the conscious politics videos and I haven’t dove into much politics in general) @Anderz I’m curious what do you mean by more social safety? I like to think more power to the individual is going to benefit