Etherial Cat

And obviously @Harlen Kelly is a prime exemple of a stud with GAME. Talking non stop about compulsively banging hot woman and loves to go by the motto "I don't owe them a relationship" once it's done. Irresistible, indeed. It screams the word "catch". Fixed it for ya.

Exactly!

Because I follow him on social media and if he'd behave like his, he'd have some serious personality split leading to functional incapacity. He's got plenty of videos on the subject, and one can just presume he's applying to his life what he preaches. Regarding Game: Just check what he had to say about PUA in the video you listed earlier. Russel doesn't describe his way of being with women as PUA technics or Game. At 2mn 04 sec, he says what he thinks of it: Manipulative and tricking. Which is exactly the point as lot of us make. I wouldn't be surprised if he did. Once upon a time, he was quite a different person from his own admission. If you'd ask him about it, I'm certain he'd come close to the analysis I made before. "I used to want to fill an inner void, so I tried to dick any vagina I could find". But I do bet his current ratio is nowhere similar to where it used to be nowadays and this is what I've been referring to. Russel is now married and has kids. He's a totally different person. That's probably when the relationship gets holistic enough to call it being in a relationship for most. But you can sleep with people without getting a girlfriend as well.

The reason why women love Russel is because he treats them well. If he'd have the wish to get laid 100s of time for the sake of sex his energy would be different. Having sex with 100s of women is purposeless and boring. It seems like the behavior of someone who is relentlessly searching for something and doesn't find any solace from one night to the other. That's a behavior typically coming from lost, bereft people.

Russel seems to be "a natural" to me. His attractiveness comes from being an effortless incarnation of several Divine Masculine archetype with a very well integrated feminine side. He's not trying to seduce anyone to get something out of them, for himself. Which is what is repulsive (aka creepy) in Pick Up Artist. He's just playful and flirtatious. From what I've seen so far, most PA have an underlying vibe of insecurities and devilry. They use women as second order interest to validate themselves and fix a deficient self-esteem or frame themselves as studs in front of other guys. They also put sex above other consideration. Usually, they go from partner to partner and have issues settling down or to create meaningful relationships. Also, from what I have noticed IRL, they come from a place of control which they hardly want to surrender EVEN while in relationship. A lot of them distrust women and see relationship as a zero-sum-game. For a woman like me, PUA are only studs in their heads. When it comes to having the most important qualities to make a relationship work, there is nothing. And there is something almost comical in having so called seduction expert insisting on Game being so irresistible when all you it inspires you is to lock your vagina behind a chastity panty. Russel on the other hand, is whole, doesn't come off as needy, doesn't delegate his authority nor search validation through approval. He's been married twice and has children. He loves women. He's been committing to women. He's being playful in his seduction and operates from a win-win paradigm. I don't think he'd refer his way of interacting with the other gender as "Game". I've been flirting with people since I've been a teenager. But this has nothing to do with PUA. In the video posted earlier, you even see him state why he dislike PUA and he converges towards my analysis. -> PUA try to distillate seduction principles and use them for their own gain. And that's unattractive to anyone who's able to clock that behavior.

@Raphael You can anytime send me a DM. That seems very common in men, you know. Guys are emotionally suppressed and taught to disregards emotions and see them as something weak which needs to be controlled. So it's a bit of a paradox.

I'm interested in conscious relationships as much as I can. The least lies and deception mechanism I can go through, the better. You know how falsehood is pushing water with a broomstick upwards. I want to show myself as I am. I want the guy to stick around because he likes me, and not some facade. Self-Deception, tactics, manipulation and playing games are the last thing I'd recommend for bringing cohesion in a couple. It will just lead the two people in a lie. Honesty, integrity and being clear with your agenda and intention is your best bet.

! Sounds good! Keep us updated.

We are hard wired for a multi-level form of attraction because sex is only one aspect of a relationship. For us, sex is more of a culmination point. That's how we are designed as female, as you say. We also certainly engage into sorting out the highest quality mates we can get, but assigning this value is a mix both of objective and subjective factors. And the subjective factors is where one has got margin to bring up awareness and more conscious dating, out of what is imposed to us by nature. Our experience as human is limited and thus conditional by default because reality enforces on us standards we have to cope with. Which means we can't give our time and ressources away to everybody. This is why the objective factors can't be ignored. Whether you want to call these aspects "game" or not is up to you, but I dislike this wording due to the pre-existing lingo which ties it to sheer seduction. So I think it brings potentially a lot of confusion here. There are two notions here, survival and "game". And while game is survival, survival and game aren't the same thing. Also... I don't get why it is so outlandish to want a man to stick around. Ideally, isn't this also what you are also looking for? The two survival drives are more synergetic than two distinct and conflicting agendas over the long run. It's about finding out to reconciliate them, not making it a zero sum game.

The waiting before sex thing has more to do with assessing compatibility and health before putting yourself in a vulnerable position. Whether it is physically, emotionally, socially.. And at this point it has little to do with a seduction strategy, because before several interactions usually you don't even know if you are interested. Seeing this as a power move or game consciously played on men is not so much the right lens. Sure, some women will do that. But in general, it's nothing malicious. The want is just not fully there yet.

I'd suggest you not to think too much ahead . This is a decision that should be made as things unfolds and more context precise what should be done. But in this situation I'd see two ways. 1) Dropping your romantic expectations if no clear signs on interest or investment are given on his side IF you are sincerely up for having him as a friend. 2) Call it quit. You want to see this guy start taking the lead and invest in the relation with his time, care and effort. If you've got to keep nudging him to come to you after you've reached him on social media + initiated conversations + made most of talks+ took the lead for hanging around + got all flirty, and he's still not even reaching out with a text afterwards... Something is off. I'd move my focus elsewhere until he shows reciprocity.

It sounds like some low investment, blue zone type of texting to me. You say you are mostly chatting with him through social media, and haven't met him yet again IRL. So, so far, you are quite foreign to him. Just a virtual acquaintance texting him from time to time. I'd suppose that if he has average skills with females, he's probably aware he could try something with you. If that's the case, he's not interested enough to make it move to the other level and that happens. But some guys with less experience can totally miss cues and obvious opportunities. It's a thing. Just beware of him becoming an MPI guy (minimum personal investment) using you as an ego validatation tool, leaving you in limbo. That's also a thing. If I were you, I'd casually offer him to hang around once (you'll need to find a reason or opportunity to make it happen). Then, casually let him know you're interested. You do this by showing you are open and receptive, through being genuinely flirty and playful. If he still doesn't get it, a few insinuation. But definitely let him do enough of the work and show investment. If he misses the opportunities, just assume this stuff is not working. Also, you want to look whether he initiates the conversation and seek you from time to time. If nothing comes from him and you do the heavy lifting, just move on. You've got to see your time and energy as the n°1 priority. Save your ressource for guys with whom you can go somewhere and are willing to put efforts. Forget the others.

Ya little trickster! I didn't see it coming. It 100% make sense, though!

It seems like she was waiting for you to make a move. Obviously, she gave you some clear sign she was interested. I'd say, you've lacked assertiveness. I personally like outward flirting and a clear intention on the masculine side. At least, when I accept the flirting and give the green lights. If then I am being left waiting and nothing happens, it comes off very "bleh" and disappointing. There is a quote saying that women forgive easily a clumsy move from someone they are interested, but have a harder time dealing with a missed opportunity. Maybe she's low key disappointed. You could try waiting for a new opportunity to show and see if she gives you clear signs again. This time, try to take the lead for the next level type of flirting... while still being detached from the outcome. And also, don't beat yourself up so much. This type of talking is going against being detached of outcome which is what you want to get at. Ideally, if something like that happens you want to be able to rebound very easily. Keep talking with girls. Create yourself even more opportunities by being social like you've been so far. You did very well until that point.

@Nahm

@Mz Hyde It's designed to make you forget your body. From what I can recall, there is no smell and the taste in your mouth is by default so familiar you don't pay attention to it in daily life. Except if you do the fatal mistake to bite into some raw onion. Feelings are not a sense, just like thoughts aren't a sense. They are both part of mind and what creates a sense of self through identification. As a human being, you can't ever expect to stop having feelings or thoughts. But as far as I know, thoughts can be drastically diminished by doing serious spiritual work or via enlightenment. Both are tied to one another. A thought should be linked to its corresponding feeling. The reason most of us do not experience this is because the average human nowadays is so emotionally repressed and fragmented. Nope. Nothing would have been done to stop the mind from the level you're talking. To do this, it's meditation, psychadelics or death.

Experiment it for yourself... Get into a sensory deprivation tank.

Habit should be renamed constancy.

Intimacy. As in seeing through. I believe awareness itself is what is capable of intimacy and self-realization is intimacy with the whole. In the common language, it carries this sense of familiarity, an ability to relate and remove a barrier between a subject and an object. Generally speaking, intimacy between humans can be divided in several categories: Emotional intimacy- the ability to be close on the emotional level. Feeling safe to reveal one's vulnerability and feelings. Intellectual intimacy- the ability to be on the same page intellectually/conceptually. Communicating views, thoughts and believes safely and being met there. Spiritual intimacy- the ability to share the same level in awareness/perception. Resonating on the spiritual level. Experiential intimacy- sharing moments, life and experience, the same reality Physical intimacy- the ability to feel a sense of sameness/closeness on the body level/ physical form level. The end game of intimacy is recognizing Oneness in all there is. Seeing how everything is only one. It is what fosters unity. Love. Wholeness... Of course, the whole game of awakening is also recovering intimacy with Self (in all its dimensions!).

A lot of racist sexual preferences are tied to maintening survival capital within a group. The group is a collective ego which co-opt its member through a pre-set of ideal physical features among other identification factors. All groups kinda have a "poster child" of what is the ideal look. Having them will enhance the privileges given. Not having them will increase the rejection/hardship to get approved. As a consequence, individual tends to screen out ahead who is good material or not and that is what translate into attraction. Also, depending on the group's SD development, it will be open or not to other features. When the group gravitates around Blue or even Orange, individuals face potentially a significant amount of hardship for going against the flow. In average, they naturally seek the approval of their peers. So usually, there is a lot of racist preference there. It gets much easier at Green.

Yes, I think it might be possible. Women aren't meant to claim men physically, but men certainly are. Guys seems to have a whole dynamique around occupying the space around her and get her to surrender. Sex is a very important component of this, like some sort of culmination point. If the match is good, she'll show great receptivity, openness and be completely surrendered. Great sex makes her give herself completely away. So maybe you'd want to be the one she's the most surrendered to? As I said before, women don't claim men physically, but internally. It's through the emotions, the heart. Some sort of masculine weak spot. It's what makes him come to you in the first place. I don't care much about the meaningless sex he can get, but a woman with the power to sway the man I love away because she's more interesting to him is the best way to get jealous.

@HypnoticMagician Even when it comes to human justice, there are several types of justice to be identified. There is the distributive justice (determining who gets what), the procedural (determining how fairly people are treated), the retributive (based on punishment for wrong-doing) and restorative type of justice (which tries to restore relationships to "rightness.") Seeing justice as what gives/should punishment for a "wrongful behavior" is concept inherited by the Patriarchal religions, gired towards a Masculine, meritocratic and conditional form of spiritually.

@Michiryoku I had a natural enlightenment a few years ago. What I recall is being unity. I became infinite love and saw the perfection in the all. I had no more self-concept and I carried no more wounds. I was whole and was the whole. And all the suffering was illusory. I also recall having no more will. And no more fear.

@Nahm Hm. So...Would you make a will or not ? I don't get it.

That's mostly ego + the whore madonna complex coming together. The ego compares itself to other men/women on a constant basis and project it's insecurities on them at the first chance. It does this already in daily life but it is particularly difficult when it does this in relation to the person it "loves" (it deserves the " in this context cause that's just ego). In a nutshell, you want this person to be all yours and hate any conceptual threats going against this idea, whether it is past, future or just imagination. To the ego, previous lovers possessing the "beloved" cheapens how special one must be to be with this person. So in this context, the ego doesn't feel exceptional anymore. Plus it also change how high value she/he is in the ego's eyes. If many had what you had, then how is she/he not just something easy to get? Then, it also increases the chance of the lover actually enjoying someone else better than you which feels wounding. Because the ego wants to be the best, the most admired, the most coveted, yada yada. That's named jealousy. ... I still do feel jealousy nowadays but it's more of a distant background feeling than something having control on my decision/affecting my relationships. Also for me it's not so much on the sexual level. It's more being envious of other women who got his heart. The jealousy is mostly about the good time spent together and intrusive thoughts of intense passionate/intimate sex (cause I wish it all for myself ?). But I recognize it for what it is and I am glad the person I love had experiences before.