Galyna

There is a basic instinct that needs to be satisfied, I don't think that they think about it and take it so serious in the first place. Again, it is easy to extrapolate about it being a girl. When you are hungry, all you think is food. Are you trying to be logical about it? No. Because it is irrational. Same here. The first goal is to get laid, who cares about the consequences and what girl might care about. In a way it is stupid because men have to invent all the tricks to bang. Like my friend told me: "If I am honest about my intentions, I will never have sex." Men are silly animals. I know lots of women who could manipulate with sex to get what they want, even a wedding ring. But we can not ultimately screen all men as potential hubbies on the first date. There is always an element of the game. He does not know you and you do not know him. Why on Earth he needs to treat you as something special? It is way too early on this stage. Of course he approaches everyone, so? Why taking it personally? If it meant to be, it meant to be. Any man who approaches you needs time to open up this potential. You, yourself do not know the scenario of your unfolding relations. Nobody knows. Me too. This is a very romantic scenario with a lot of expectations that might lead to a broken heart. I do not say that we should sleep with the first man we see on the date. But I suggest to be realistic about it and leave your expectations outside the bedroom. These are all generic rules for the average user. Not everybody is highly developed, including women. So for low-conscious women the game night work. On every stage of your development there is a certain process you use to screen people for the qualities that are attractive to you. You are the woman, perhaps, that can see through the illusion and the guy needs to work harder to put you in bed. But I know you are married, just saying in general. It is easier to say than to implement. You give also a generic advice now. Men have different backgrounds, cultures, history, families, upbringing, traumas, etc. I really like you, Emerald. But in this post let me disagree with you. It is a bit bias and I feel like something deep inside irritates you about this PU. You take it very serious. Man can approach you in any way he likes. If there is a real spark between you and him, a chemistry, all the knowledge and advice he learned from so called "gurus" will fly out in the window. Because men are alive people, they are not robots and every man has its own magical road to his heart. He just need to find the One. And during the journey they all need to f...ck! Hope you will not be upset with my words. Hugs.

@Meetjoeblack I feel you, my dear.Otherwise, what to do when you want sex with your entire being and cant get it but maybe with a prostitute. I am not being a sarcastic. I mean it. I feel for men since it is hard to control sexual drive. Also I think it is unfair. I absolutely agree with you and I do not want my son, when he is old enough, to get married with a first girl he will be sleeping with. I want him to find a decent woman, to have experience first, to try. I have a lot of guy friends and this is my advice to them: to sleep around, have fun and have sex. Today I quoted Leo's PUA comment to my guy friend. Men are monogamous by nature, we have to accept it.

Thank you for your comment. “I think you can do all that solo.” You need a partner to test your own boundaries. I can tell you all day long that I am a super woman and might think of myself this way, but in relations I would behave differently. You need another person to provoke you, let’s put it this way. I can not do it alone. You need someone to be there to mirror you, to tell you about your own bs. I absolutely need someone to challenge me and to be very direct with me, to help me to improve and learn. Only through another person I can understand myself better. Solitude will not show you anything. You returned home angry and provoke a fight. What would be my reaction? Would I say: “Honey, let’s talk” or start fighting back? See, what I mean? “Have you experienced the sort of LTR status you speak of?” – again, this is super hard to evaluate myself, I have biases and blind spots. I am in the LTR right now, eight years of marriage, I am not perfect, I am still learning, we have a lot to work on as a couple, but in general my husband is a very good guy. We have a child together. I hope from all my heart it will last, if not, he always will be the dearest person for me, a father of my child. If one day we need to go through a separation, I hope that we’ll be mature enough to go through it with respect and compassion. “The culture seems to tell women to deny their femininity, fertility, and any desire for a family.” I am from different culture, family is a big thing there. The whole entire survival is based upon family ties. “There's nothing more destructive then our degenerate culture.” I wonder what made you say this? How old are you?

@Derek White @Keyhole Guys stop it, please. We are talking about PUA here. Do not take it personally. We are not in a real world, and sometimes online communication has a lot of challenges. I am sure in reality you would perceive each other differently. Nobody is right or wrong. There is a room for any opinion. You do not know each other and pushing each other's boundaries. Anyway, the person you are dealing with now is not a real person, it is just a projection of your mind and biases, let's remember this. Wrap up and let's continue the topic.

Yep, yep, yep. I agree with this. Personally, I do not see anything wrong with it. Sometimes guys need to be sneaky to hide this truth from women, because we, women, want to condition sex with various obligations.

It is a like a burning potential: to me, and I suppose I have a bit romantic vision of it, relations like this make you a better person, you become closer to your core being, closer to God, you grow, you mature, you learn, you develop, you learn how to compromise, how to listen, how to sacrifice your ego for the sake of the loved one. You put the interest of other above your own agenda. You can let go and still love a person even if he stopped loving you back or chose to be with another woman. To me it is when you love the person more than your own ego!!!!

Leo, please make a video about this. I have been asking you about this video for almost five years I've been following you. I really would appreciate it because I want to know your opinion about Conscious Relations. Not all women are attracted to jerks. I am super attracted to smart, intelligent, deep men. I do not care about humor as such. But Gosh, when you learn from a man and he has a lot of interesting things to teach/explore with you, this is the most valuable. You talk about humor a lot. I agree, it is sexy at the beginning. But what happens next? You long for a meaningful conversation with a partner, for intimacy where you can expose the most craziest parts of your being and not being scared to be judged. As for me, I think the most valuable is when your partner can open the parts of you which unknown to your entity. I compare it with a room. Some men in my life had a key to unlock this potential in me, other did not. I, even myself, do not have a key to this wonderful room (a part of myself). I do not know what triggers this. Sometimes, I could returned back from the date and I could write poems because man could unlock this potential within me. He could unlock my creativity. This is so sexy. Usually, the most sexiest things in the world do not pertain to sex itself. They are hidden. You are right, it is all about opening a woman emotionally. Than you for your feedback. Maybe one day you have time to record a video about self-actualized relations that we all need to strive for with our partners. Lots of hugs.

@Leo Gura Leo, what would you recommend to men in terms of pick up who are really seeking an authentic relation? Do you use these approaches you write yourself? I am not talking about getting laid or to satisfy sexual needs. I would like to hear your opinion about authentic relations. How would you screen for a potential partner for a long-term relations? What approach would you use with her?

I have watched it. And also I read a lot of books by other teachers ?

@VeganAwake sure, thanks. Let me frame it first, then I will send you my questions, I need to contemplate a bit how to wrap it.

@VeganAwake Man, I am afraid the moderators will complain I am flooding the thread with the topic that does not pertain to the conversation about Free Will.

@VeganAwake Thank you for your advice. It is very informative. I have couple of questions, though....do you mind answering?

@VeganAwake Thank you so much for your answer ❤. Never heard about Helen Schucman, thank you for sharing a nice quote. I really truly believe I am not a doer, however, desires of mine drive me crazy. IF, I can not change anything what is the point of wishing, right? Just take your life as it unfolds without any expectations. Live it in the present moment. I understand it with my mind, but not with my heart. Because deeply I want to realize something and I can not let it go. As soon I start to suppress it, subconscious mind delivers my desires in my dreams. This is so annoying. This creates suffering. I am so tired of this. I want to surrender and let it go. But from time to time, I start daydreaming about my desire and it takes me into the land of the mind constructions, stories, false beliefs and so on. I want to be free from my desires. I also know that there is only one way to this Freedom, and this way is Enlightenment. I just hope by the end of my life somehow I will achieve it. Perhaps, you would tell me ( as in your prior topics you told other people) that I set a time frame for this event to happen and I should not do it. Anyway.... How lucky your are to see through the prism of this silly illusion❤.

@VeganAwake Thank you very much for all your wisdom. I was reading some other posts by you and have a question. Before you became liberated, have you ever felt that since you were not a controller, this is no point, all this is so funny and does not make any sense. Honestly, it feels so lonely and depressing for my so called "illusory ego". I feel like a fool. All meanings are lost. I am not enlightened yet to grasp it with my little brain, but I am not interested to feed my ego with various stories either. This is ridiculous how much of importance we want to put on our meaningless existence. Thank you for your time and answer.

@Leo Gura Just done with my class this week. I took Multidisciplinary Studies this semester . The funniest thing is that everything I learned from that class was not knew to me because I heard every single concept from you prior taking that class. Thank you, Leo. I don’t want to sound like fan but it is really up to us how to use the information you give in the videos. Personally, your information helped me a lot, and I applied some of it for the university. Really loved that video you posted about Chomsky. There is so much to learn from Actualized.org. Hate when people are bitching about it. hell, it does not have to be all about Enlightenment at the end!

@TrynaBeTurquoise I had about seven lucid dreams in my life. It was very unique experience. I noticed one peculiarity, when I maintain awareness during the day or on a regular basis, lucid dreaming becomes a byproduct of this awareness, even when I go to bed. Also, I was lucid dreaming after valuable spiritual insights or progresses in my self-development.

@Leo Gura thank you Leo for your answer and for your hard work.

@Raptorsin7 I know you’re. ?

@Raptorsin7 I wish I can delete it somehow, let me try

Leo, can you pls explain what you mean “without touching them” ? Is it a bit closer to what Osho explains in his book “Love, Freedom and Aloneness”? But do you think a regular human being, let’s say a man who is after self-actualization, is capable to love someone unconditionally, truly? Without mixing his personal agenda and emotions into a true manifestation of love? Thank you ?.

Absolutely agree with you. I think the more you drive someone insane(in a good way) the better sex is, you need to suffer a bit to get what you want. Otherwise, if you don’t make effort, you really don’t appreciate it enough. But I also see where he ( Leo) is coming from. I had experience of meeting people and establish the rapport in a short period of time, it just clicks , for some magic reason. Your authentic self comes naturally and effortlessly. It is either your person or not. And who cares when you had sex, ?.

Leo, can you pls pls make a video for us about your vision of a true intimacy, like an example of the relationship of people who pursue enlightenment. I have been always wanting to hear your opinion about this. I know it is hard for you to find a counterpart who meets all your standards , but what is that woman you would like be with? I am sorry for asking such a private question. I always wanted to know this, what other man that like you prefer? What does this woman need to have to attract a philosopher?

@Leo Gura I love you, Leo . Very straight forward and no BS. Second date, hah? I thought men did not like girls who are an easy game. ? but, yeah, you are special. My only thing is that even if I am crazy about man, I still need time to get used to him( to his body and smell). The more you wait, the better chances are for a passion. What about mental connection?

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@Angelo John Gage only 3