ROOBIO

I am 24. Basically, I am relatively healthy and have cut out processed meats and dairy. I exercise every day for an hour and meditate/go to retreats. I used to have bad social anxiety. It went away but it has come back. I think it is because I am working at a job which is soul-destroying to save money. I don't really connect with anyone at my work. Because I am studying for accounting qualification and a vet school application at the same time I am a bit isolated, and I was thinking maybe loneliness is causing this, as some studies have cited that prolonged loneliness is dangerous to your health. It can lead to chronic stress then brain fog. I only get it when I am at work. I feel so aloof. When I am not at work, I feel a lot calmer/sharper and motivated to work on myself. Never done a hormone panel. It is scary as I am forgetting a lot of information that I learn quite fast.

So as I am starting my LP and planning it out I get of fears arising. Eg ”what if I am not successful” ”what if I fail” ”what if I don’t make any money” ”what if I end up homeless” ”what if it isn’t the right path for me to go down” Sometimes they can get quite strong. Does anyone know how to deal with these? how to interpret them? And how to separate it out from tour intuition? @Leo Gura

@Leo Gura this video was amazing! It felt very different and more practical. You were using fundamental teaching's that are kind of abstract and applying that to break down cultural expectations and values. It was beautiful and super tangible/applicable. Are you planning to do more videos like this in the future?

Wow! After my last trip, I finally grasped what Leo was talking about with respect to science. I love science, I studied maths and physics at uni. However, my faith in it has been shaping my view on life. Until I started using LSD/4-ago. My last trip was about 2 months ago. It was raining (btw tripping whilst raining is the best). Before the come up everything seemed normal. Just lil old me living on planet earth, that orbits the sun, walking to the field near my house to trip. It was a heavy dose. During the come up everything started to become brighter. Objects within my awareness started to morph and change colour. Trees started to look like aliens. The horizon started to seem like it was right next to me. Kind of like distance contraction predicted in special relativity. Animals, like birds, deer, squirrels lost their reality. They became very different, they didn't adhere to any biological laws that were bestowed upon them in my previous state of consciousness. They dissolved, they lost their place in the ecosystem. The eco-system didn't exist any more. It completely changed into something else. The rain wasn't rain, it was something else, they change velocities at will, they became luminescent, they looked like diamonds. The wind began to talk, it became alive for god sake hahaha. My biological self died and lost its self within the experience. My feelings merged with all the other contents within awareness. Then the insight hit me!!! I was like what the fuck!!!!!!! My whole understanding of science is the ONLY dependant on phenomena arising in the predominant state of consciousness. My egoic state! When reality seems normal and physical (only due to it being self consistent) we can maintain scientific laws. Once we change our state of consciousness, those laws no longer apply, the whole realm of physics, chemistry and biology is different when tripping. You see how you are one with everything, that everything is actually arising out of the void... Science can never explain this. I still love science and it is very useful to understand in our lives. It's fascinating. But don't take it as the be all end all. From my perspective, combining science with mysticism has been fucking the best thing that has happened to me!!!

@Leo Gura If physics, from a certain perspective, is saying that we can break down certain objects into its constituent particles. So we can say my skin is made from carbon, which can be broken down into protons/neutrons/electrons. The motion of these particles can be described as using a wavefunction. Each particle, massive or small, has a wavelength of Planck's constant divided by momentum. Ie massive objects don't display wave-like properties as their wavefunction is negligible. It is when particles on the scale of subatomic particles have momentums approx planks constant that their wavelengths are greater. The wavefunction of these particles, if squared, gives probability fields of what the quantum state will be in at time t. Meaning that particles can be in two places at once if not observed due to their wave-like nature. However, this is describing only certain senses like Sights and Sounds. How does this explain what feelings/thoughts are? How can wavefunctions describe their nature? Why are these sensations so elusive to science? From my discoveries in spirituality, they are the same thing, sights, feelings and thoughts are all nothing, being seen by nothing, and existing as nothing. Why is science able to model sights but not feelings? Can you describe the motion of a feeling through a wavefunction?

Isn’t this a paradox as ego is a subset of god. God is simultaneously judging you and accepting you at the same time

If you ever find yourself playing the victim... Shut the fuck up and watch this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fU8AnqSOih0

and this... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ziqq5gUXu8g

Fuck it I am gunna go to India to start a animal hostpital

What do you mean by 9-5 jobs? There are some “9-5” jobs that give you an opportunity to express your creativity and passion. You can also in fact grow together as a team if you express the same values. i currently work into a 9-5 job. But it’s is just doing accounting I am just doing it to save money for better things. I but I can see the work itself is stunting my growth. Because it is not my passion and ruining my creative expression in the day.

Something else I noticed. When perceptions are just seen as perceptions (ie there is no illusory filter that colours experience in certain ways that are dependant on your belief systems) things become very funny. I laugh at a lot of things now. Watching things do what they do is very odd. There is no grounding to any perception. Watching people do what they do, and when you can see that percetion is arising and passing away out of you, is so funny. I laugh at peoples mannerism because they are so unique and beautiful. I laugh at everything. Isn't just a strange thing that's going on. The situation you find yourself in. This is non-existence hahahaha

Generally, fuck the gurus. Take their practices, see what resonates with you, see the results, experiment yourself. Don't give them any authority. You don't know their motives, they can easily manipulate you, they need to survive too. Do it yourself, with independent thought.

Yeah this is it just something that I noticed in my journey which I find quite sad. It is that when you are a child, you are totally complete, totally content, totally whole, you are unapologetically authentic, but as you grow up society breaks you. It makes you feel like you are incomplete. That you are not worthy unless you obtain x or look like y. It makes you feel that you aren’t good enough unless you don’t have these items, or be successful. It makes you inauthentic. You are brainwashed by a materialistic ideology. Are economy thrives on materialism. You need to buy shit to make others rich. Girls need to put on make up when they are kids to feel beautiful, so the make up companies get their money. But they are beautiful as they are without makeup, you don’t need make up to be beautiful, you are inatly beautiful as you are. We judge girls for being “ugly”, this feeds the problem. By that judgement you are helping the massive conglomerates get their profits. But you have to have a low self esteem, companies thrive on it. But the truth is you are born into a world that is perfect just the way it is and you are perfect just the way you are. Once we realise we can be happy whilst having absolutely nothing to your name, we will over consume until everything is fucked.

I believe this is the dilemma animal face. Aren’t we so lucky to trick ourselfs that we are in fact a separate self. Only love can be given to our egos, only love, through love, you will help end it’s tyranny over yourself.

@Raptorsin7 Just practicing passionately. Hardcore meditation 2+ hours a day, vipassana retreats, concentration is so important. Once you can concentrate on an object for a long time, without being distracted by thoughts, you can start to do some deep self inquiry. Then psychedelics. It feels like we can go deeper. It doesn’t end here. We are only at the stage of taming the ox, so to speak. It’s worth all that suffering, the void it’s incredible, it’s like you are diving into a pond, a sea of infinite potential...

Commercial air travel is currently responsible for a relatively tiny part of the global carbon footprint —just 3.5% of total greenhouse gas emissions, according to the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change. But the unique chemistry of high-altitude jet emissions may produce an additional warming effect, while the explosive growth in air travel makes it one of the fastest-growing sources of carbon gases in the atmosphere. And unlike energy or automobiles, where carbon-free or lower-carbon alternatives already exist, even if they have yet to be widely adopted, there is no low-carbon way to fly, and they're likely won't be for decades. The Airports Council International estimates that the number of airline tickets sold per year will double to more than 9 billion by 2025. Much of the growth will come in rapidly developing Asia, where passenger numbers are increasing by 10% to 15% annually. Even as carbon emissions from air travel grow rapidly, scientists are investigating claims that they may double the warming effect because of the altitude at which they're emitted. As jets soar they leave behind contrails, vapor threads of condensation that can persist for hours, especially in colder areas, and behave like high-altitude cirrus clouds. Those clouds seem to have a net warming effect, trapping heat in the atmosphere. Planes also create ozone, a greenhouse gas that has a stronger warming effect at high altitudes than low. The science is still being nailed down, but the side effects of high-altitude emissions could double air travel's contributions to global warming. Are we using our magical ability to fly irresponsibly?

How many hows a day do you work? What is the recommended amount?

Yeah, to be honest, it doesn't matter. I don't worry about the outcome, I just try to do the best I can. Everything is progressing as need be.

Yeah, this is the perspective I am generally using. I didn't emphasis it in my post because I was only highlighting the effects the industry could have on the environment. I saw it in myself. I was willing to put 1.6 tonnes of Co2e in the atmosphere just to see my brother for 2 weeks when he is moving back anyway a couple of months after. We have to evaluate whether flights we take are needed and worth that cost. It is difficult though because it is a subjective opinion. However, most people I interact with on a daily basis do not take this perspective. They just assume because they have the money to be able to afford a plane that they can use it, which is fine, but they abuse it. People can get flights from London to Russia for £10. I know people that fly every other weekend. As well as eating meat and dairy on a daily basis. Not everybody lives on an island, away from their family and friends. Most live in cities in close proximity to their relatives. Generally speaking. At what cost do we need our lives to be enriched? An interesting piece of data pulled from Seth Wynes 2017 environmental research paper.

I am starting to agree. I was planning on visiting my brother, who lives in India, for 2 weeks. Then I realised the absurdity of flying around the world to visit someone for ONLY 2 weeks. What a luxury we have, and it is absolutely taken for granted. Flights have become too cheap and are accessible to many people. A dangerous mix.

What do you trade? and how do you get into it?

Does any one experience memory changes after taking a psychedelic. Do you notice a change in memory for the better or for the worse? How does it effect your long term memory or short term memory?

What are the best ways to practice self love? Ok I understand. Don’t slack. Still work out, still focus on you LP. Mix the inner Jihad with the outer Jihad. Will give this a shot, thank you so much !

I have had some deep awakenings over the past month. Utterly profound. Even though these awakenings were deep, the aftermath was pure suffering. I realise the devil has been operating my life since I was a teenager. It is so paradoxical because it is apart of oneness. But it feels like it is separate. And now it is stronger then ever before. I have seen what is lurking within my unconscious mind and it is not pretty. All the worst things I could have possibly thought about myself has arisen into my awareness. It is paralysing. It is scary. It is hard to see it as an illusion because it is so powerful. I am scared. I am confused. I am lost. I can’t do anything. My emotions are completely out of control. I have lost my mind. There is so sense of any grounding to my reality. One moment I cry, one moment I am paralysed with anxiety. Taking my away ability to make any desicions. I have lost interest in material aspects of life, and I have reduced me social circle to literally a couple of people and family. I struggle to relate to my family any more because they are so different. They don’t have the same values. It is hard to keep any relationships with this peculiar, intense yet strangely synchronistic experience going on. Heck I am losing my ability to communicate and form sentences with people. The only thing I know I can do is to meditate more. I am in too deep now. I guess I have to continue and work through this stuff. I am only 24, sometimes I wonder weather to leave this work for a later time. But I can’t I have seen some deep shit. I can’t go back to my materialistic life. But my meditation are scary. The sensations get more intense, they get more dark. I have images/thoughts of suicide or killing others. And I never knew I am capable of thinking these thoughts and feeling these feelings. One thing is to just observe these feelings, these thoughts it will pass. Has anyone experienced this after having awakening experiences?

So after my 4 aco dmt trip which I took after 10 day meditation retreat. It felt like the light of consciousness spilt my mind in two with glass. I became the void and saw how everything is arising out of me. Biggest mind fuck. Now I see that there is nothing outside my direct experience, that my direct experience is floating within nothingness, existing in no particular location. It is like a bubble. Then when I look at another person I see nothing in side them. They don’t exist in any location. It is like the present moment is a bubble within a bubble within a bubble to infinity existing nowhere