Olaf

Try to not ask questions while talking, make assumptions, and with what information you get from those assumptions talk and tell a story, you will notice she starts to respond and eventually asks questions to you, which way you want to have it, instead of asking questions to her. Now she is showing interest instead of you showing interest into her. It is hard to do, because you are so used to ask questions, but it is a great thing to do in conversations. For example `you seem like you are from portugal` then she says `no I am from italy` then you can talk a story about italy and eventually she will start asking questions to you. Then you got her hooked. I have practiced this for a bit and the responses are great.

I am gonna delete this post in 48 hours so read well and learn guys.. this is me free associating and flirting with some hot girl, see how I am acccusing her of coming on to me? That is the frame I took here and had fun with it. Also you can't do this when you aren't in flow, meaning if you aren't cold approaching. You are in flow shit like this comes naturally to your mind, but here you get a bit of an idea how it goes.

Okay, I am getting clearer on this. I literally feel like I am on the edge of something big here. I was making approaches, and I got to experience these bad streaks. Now, don't get me wrong, they are nowhere near as bad as when I was just beginning and girls were telling me to fuck off, lol. They are still polite and everything most of the time, but what happens is that when I am not having a "good" day, meaning my energy is off, which happens, and should be expected, I start feeling this pressure or tension, like, I AM GOING TO APPROACH. I am not fully present in the moment, I am thinking about the approach I am about to do. Then I approach almost preparing myself for the interaction instead of letting it be organic, free-flowing, and authentic. I was watching Jeff with his channel `Presence in the Void`, and Jeff really described well how you get stifled in your body. Your muscles tense up, almost as if they're preparing you for battle. It's like you're getting ready to jump off a cliff or something. Of course, that energy is horrible to approach someone with. So he talks about first becoming aware of that build-up, that tension in the body, then becoming 10% less tense and acting like you're stoned. It was funny, I tried that today. In my head, I was singing a Dutch stoner song, which made me feel a bit stoned. I acted a bit like I was stoned, I tried to become 10% less tense and stay aware of the tension in the body, and I noticed an improvement in my approaches. Yet I don't have enough data to say, "That's it. This is all there is to it." Also, by pure magic, Owen is coming to my city Amsterdam this weekend, just as I am getting into all of this social stuff. So who knows, I might go to his free tour just to see him in person and learn. But anyway, I was listening to him, and I realized that I am taking an introverted approach and maybe an extroverted approach with massive amounts of approaching in short periods of time is needed for momentum, instead of taking breaks in between to come back to yourself as introverts naturally feel the need or want to do so.

btw a good way to tell a story and make her ask questions is to have your story and right before a certain plot happens, you don't say it, but you make her curious, wanting to ask you a question. For example "I was on vacation to Barcelona and...... (long story).... anyways next day something crazy happend, it still makes me laugh " Then if she gets the bait she will be like "what happend??" and now you got her asking you questions and you can even delay the story a bit for some extra tension.

@LordFall I am an INFP even tho I have been pushing my social life to the limit, so I am probably more in an extroverted state at the moment, but I could easily go back to not socialising at all and be all introverted and stuff, I even get drained at some point especially during day game, where I will go in state after around an hour, then I will be in state for like 2 hours and then it crashes and I don't want to talk to anyone anymore hahaha

I went all in this weekend, I did both day and night game and I have lost count of how many girls I have approached but definitely above 100. These are the things I learned. 1. day game and night game are very different, woman are at night together or with a guy or guys, so you have to approach 2 sets or bigger sets also the energy is much more outgoing and fun. During the day you can more easily find one girl without friends, which makes you have a more intimate conversation. The energy is a bit more normal during the day compared to at night where you can go fucking nuts. 2. don't ask questions in the beginning, you are tempted to ask questions, but rather keep those for later. It is kind of like being an entertainer, you entertain them and lead them, doesn't mean be a clown, but just be self amused and when they feel attraction they will show interest either by touch, asking questions or other IOI's and then asking open ended questions makes sense. 3. Be social all the time, I talked to all the girls at night, but also all the guys, at some point I was on the stage at karaoke, making everyone jump, screaming my heart out through the mic and having more fun then ever. So don't get stuck on just girls, talk to guys aswell, motivate them, make them have a good time, but also don't hang too long with them, you want to keep approaching woman. During the day keep saying hi to people, give people a box, I like to do a push-up in the middle of the street, stuff like that to keep you in state, never completly stop interacting with people, always make conversation, even when it is very small. 4. When intimidated, give value. Think of how you can give value rather then take value, you might have an intimidating set, but if you think of how you can add value at night that might mean fun and during the day that might be your presence or something more substantial. Generousity is huge, giving someone a compliment can make someones day. So whenever stuck in your head, be selfless, give, be generous, that will get you out of your head when it matters most, like when you approach that 9 or 10 5. stop rejecting yourself, aslong as she has not given you a hard no, you have time to practice to talk to a woman, so instead of leaving and rejecting yourself, stay in the conversation and open your mouth, better to say something stupid then to walk away saying nothing at all. This is especially harder during the day where people are on the move and you feel like you freeze up and reject yourself. 6. During the day give a hard stop, meaning commit to the stop, strong vocal projection, hand in front of them, go all in. Not like high energy as you do when going out, because that is making people confused. 7. Focus mainly on interacting with as many people as you can, remaining social state, looking for the win in every interaction to build winner effect, at night have a ton of fun, during the day relax and more chill vibe, but still able to do a hard stop and get someones attention and interest. 8. Your value isn't the same, it is moment to moment, at one moment you could be the top alpha guy having a 9 or 10 be interested into you, another moment you could get rejected by a 5, so what is your worth? It is whatever you believe it is, I woke up and my thought was "I deserve every single girl in the world" this was my natural thought, because no one else is approaching, I literally look at a guy with a girlfriend and think to myself, he doesn't even deserve it, he hasn't gone out and done the approaches, I even feel the urge to just go and out play him, but that is a petty egoic game I am not gonna play. 9. Seeing my wingmen get in state was eye-opening: you could see his eyes got wider, he saw opportunity and went for it, boom boom, the energy rises up and you feel it is like you can finally see. Your not looking with eyes of fear anymore, oh what if I get rejected or whatever. You get kinda fearless way more bold energy, aswell as like a weight has been lifted. Very intresting to see that in someone else then myself as I know how it feels to be in flow state, but never seen someone else be in it. I notice myself to get in state with bigger sets of 4 or 5 girls or a girl on the phone, some "difficult" set like that. 10. Lastly I would say what Owen says, an alpha men doesn't focus on only getting dates or sex, an alpha men leads men. Which is very true, I have pushed my brothers to the limit this weekend and got them both in state. I even had a new guy who never approached before and got to make him approach girls 10 times which was a real win for him and he was so grateful. So help out, again going back to generosity, but also alpha state, which is to help others, same thing as I am doing here, I am sharing knowledge I rarely reply on this forum, because you either have consumers or creators, I am a creator, I am an action taker, I like to contribute value instead of absorbing it, that is why I kinda got to hate any theory even when what I write her all sounds quite like theory lol. Anyways those were 10 things I learned this weekend, there are some value nuggets in these texts, so you might want to read it again.

Girls I am curious about what do you want in a relationship, especially as a more high conscious girls. I know all the stereotypes of marriage and kids, but besides all of that, what are things you would want in a relationship?

So what I feel makes me speak more endlessly is being free to express yourself. The freedom to express yourself, or giving yourself permission to express yourself. This also has a lot to do with high status and low status. If you feel you are low status, you feel like you don't have the freedom to speak. Like, imagine you are a billionaire. You talk however the hell you want because you have the freedom to do so. Permission happens by feeling like you are alpha. When you feel like you are controlled by someone else, by a job, a manager, other people, then there are things you can and cannot say, and you have to filter yourself. Or another one would be a friend group where something is "cool" and something is not "cool." Well, fuck, that is your boundary of expression. We can only talk about this, but not about that. That is filtered form of expression. And now, in our mind, we have a million more filters. An example would be the filter of what your parents will think. What if people you know hear you? What if you say something that was supposed to be a secret? What if you say something dumb? What if you ruin your reputation? What if you speak freely and get into a fight? ALL of this is going on in your head before you speak. And then all you can get out is, "Hello, my name is Olaf." HAHAHAHA. What the fuck is that? That's like all you could EVER possibly say? Of course not. Yet you have such high standards for yourself about what is a "good sentence" or an "inappropriate" or "wrong" sentence. What if you just speak, no matter what people think? Imagine you were talking to yourself on the top of a mountain. You would be able to talk to yourself for hours. Yet when faced with people, all of that doesn't come out. So being unfiltered is having minimal or zero filter between your thoughts and speaking them. You are not preparing what you say. You say things without preparation. You speak and might be surprised by your words afterwards. I catch myself being like, "I really said that? Wow." Like, in a good way, not like shame or anything. Just like, wow, I am getting more unfiltered. And society is so, so, so filtered. Like, one wrong thing said and they all get upset, as society is a bit autistic, including me, so everything is taken LITERALLY LOGICALLY. Yet words don't mean that much. Most of communication is subcommunication. This is why energy is more important than the right line. Right line with bad energy will always fail. Right energy with the wrong line will win in the end. So that's why I don't even care so much about what I say. I can talk about cow's milk for half an hour and it doesn't matter, because energy is more important than words. At least in socializing. Not when you are talking about money or running a business, but when it comes down to socializing. Now, what I noticed is that if you are low vibe, meaning low in energy, boring and you talk a lot, people kind of zone out. When you talk a lot but your energy is super passionate, a free range of expression, high vibe, light, fun, emotional, not heavy or logical, then people get drawn to it like moths to a flame. This is why you can have zero success, then hit flow state and get all of this success, not because your words or pickup lines got better, but because your subcommunication improved massively. If you disagree, feel free. This is how I see it and experience it in my own life.

@Yimpa or start barking hehe

@Natasha Tori Maru yeah an example would be I approached this girl today and I said "I love your trousers, you look quite creative... let me guess your an artist" she wasn't an artist, but we both got to the conclusion that she had an artsy vibe with her glitter make up and it made for a more fun interaction then all these interview questions. If she starts showing interest aswell, then I might ask more open-ended questions. But as a general rule for myself right now, I don't want to be the first to ask questions.

I would say with me and most guys who are starting is that they ask too many questions, leading towards showing way too much interest. Like imagine someone asking "what do you do for work?" and then "oh you work in this city?" and then "how is it to live here?" that is kind of the loop of questions most people that begin get stuck in and the girl gets bored as hell and feels like you are investing in her. Instead she should be investing into you, so asking one question probably won't do harm, but these loops of endless questions is just very high-interest as well as boring. If you can ask one or no questions at all and mainly tell a story from whatever she has given you like with your nurse example. Then it can get into a really good flow where she eventually will ask questions and show interest into you. If you go directly to qualifying questions the assumption is that you have already shown enough attraction and that could work if she is physically attracted to you, but if we are not basing it on physical attraction, then the attraction has to be build first with stories or as mystery does it with magic.

@VioleGrace don´t take it too literally that you spend 10 mins making assumptions. But I mean replace a question with an assumption. Example: "are you from spain?" to an assumption "you look like you are from spain... let me guess you are a Spanish tap dancer" then she will correct you and whatever she answers you can tell a story about. So instead of only make assumptions, maybe the better term would be, replace a question with an assumption.

@Joseph Maynor try it out and see for yourself

@LordFall yes I was out for 4 days this week, I am really starting to get better at it. I am learning some stuff I will share on here too.

While my wingmen is now on a date with a 9 who I pushed him to approached, I am having extra motivation to go out. Like now it feels like anything is possible and there is 0 competition. He told me that girl said to him she never got approached, probably because everyone is too intimidated to go up and approach, but this is an example of what can happen when you just go anyways. I could have been sitting on a date with her if I approached first, so now my mind is blown and literally is like, why the fuck do I sit at home? Lets go out and approach. Some motivation for you guys too, what the fuck are you doing at home watching Netflix for? Go out and have fun.

btw this song helps me get into state https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gJYjbDnyx-o&list=RDgJYjbDnyx-o&start_radio=1

@Natasha Tori Maru intresting, I will try it out today

Okay so one of the biggest shift for me today was to keep talking. Like I saw a girl and at first she was a bit uncomfortable, but I said don´t look so worried, nothing is gonna happen or something and laughed and kept talking. Like keep talking is not just about being a radio host, but more about not letting too many quiet moments fall in the first few minutes and taking action instead of passivity. Atleast I feel that works well in day game, during the night you can jump up and down and twerk like a monkey without saying any words lol. So another girl today I felt kinda her wanting to stop or leave or move and being tiny bit uncomfortable, but I just kept talking without caring too much about what I say, but trying to slow her down with my energy, being calm, which worked great and actually she started looking a bit mesmerised in my eyes. So I don´t put too much emphasis on the beginning what I say, but more that I keep talking not rushing, but just keep yapping while focusing on the energy, basically my mouth is yapping and my energy is calming her down.

The biggest hurdle has been for me normalising something that isn´t normally done. It isn´t common for people to talk to others, even saying hi, good day, or give a simple compliment, this is not normal for people in big cities like Amsterdam. I would almost say smaller cities or villages are much more social. I was visiting a smaller city and talked to this elderly woman for 30 mins a few days ago and she said hi to every person that came by. Then she told me `I don´t care if they don´t say hi back, that is also okay` I loved that mindset, she was a confident talkative lady hehe and I think that like, why isn´t that normal? We are so conditioned to not be social, like even having a small talk with someone seems very rare for people. We are all so busy with our own life, the only genuine place of socialising might be around night time where you go to a club or something, but even there I rarely see guys approach or they are just drunk and approach in this drunk state. It is literally so niche what I do, that sometimes it can feel like you're the only weirdo doing this. Which makes you get more in your head of course. I think that is the path when you are doing something on a higher level. If you want to evolve, you will realise how little evolved most people are. You will realise the group think where it should be "normal" that no one talks to no one and minds their own business, which is so depressing. I am being vunerable here, these are my honest thoughts and this is how I have been feeling. On the other side, there is 0 competition, because no one is talking to others, NO ONE is talking to others, it is literally depressing, but true. I am a bit sad for the world, I feel a bit of a calling to help people become social again, as this is also where allot of our issues are, we are socially isolated, and have little empathy, we are no longer social creatures like in tribes where we used to dance and sing and have connection with eachother, now it is your friends and family against the rest of the world, which is so isolating. Why can't we all be a bit more social? Why do I have to be the only weirdo approaching others and making small talk? Why isn't this learned in high school? Why are we conditioned to be so focused on ourselves instead of bringing value to others? These are some really deep questions I am thinking about now, this goes much deeper then just PUA, this is like programming of our minds by society. Is it to make us feel insecure and compensate with other means? Like makeup, working out, alcohol etc? To make money? Is it a plan to make us feel insecure? So many questions. I just had to share this, this has been weighing heavy on my heart for a bit. on a side note I have been lucky lately to find my tribe of like minded idiots who I go approach with and making me feel more normal, thanks to Owens free tour <3

I think one of the biggest things that is stopping guys is that they are afraid to step into a leadership position. If anything I have learned this year is to lead men, leading men is a hard skill, because you have to level up yourself. Yet you can grow much quicker if your intention is to lead, because now you aren't only trying to help yourself out, but you are trying to help all the men out. I lead people I have never met before, that I don't get anything from in return. Yet that help me to become a better leader, even think about this forum, I am probably one of the few here who is contributing a ton of value by my posts, I gain a little bit from being here, but ultimately I am doing this to share knowledge that other men (or woman) could use. Knowledge that is from direct experience of my own life. The opposite side I see too much not only on this forum, but in real life aswell, is this idea of bringing eachother down. This is not a leader, a leader never tries to bring people down, maybe clairify, but not lead people feeling bad about themself. Sure positive feedback, but not critisism, that is insecurity. A leader should push guys out of their comfort zone, make them take action, keep them accountable, literally even talk about their feelings. Many times I go sit down with a guy I am helping and asking "how are you feeling now?" and "what will make you feel better?" almost no one asks these questions to guys as it is not "normal" to talk about your feelings, when it is the most important thing. If you are feeling bad, good luck making positive things happen in your life. Feeling good is more important than just grinding and hustling and endlessly taking action. Don't get me wrong, it should be a combo of the two, action and feeling good. And the idea of less for them is more for me, is a scarcity perspective. I like to look at life the other way, more for them is more for me, it is more joy, more energy and motivation, more leadership skills, more knowledge even, because you learn from helping others more than doing things yourself. Ego is trying to do everything yourself, it is not meant to be that way, surely you should avoid wrong company, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't rely on others, there are plenty good people out there that you should lead, don't even look at the top dogs, look at guys with potential, those are easily accessible and you will be suprised how much you can do and also find people who are already good leaders so you can learn how to lead. I don't belief you are a real men unless you are trying to build others up, the only time I feel it is necessary to bring someone down is when they do loads of harm to a big group, like Bentinho Massaro, that is the only time I feel that it is actually responsible to take them down, but besides that there is no reason to bring people down, it will not make yourself feel good anyways and therefor good things won't happen to you.

@Natasha Tori Maru yes so you say they observe theorise classify. Meaning they are missing both connecting as well as questioning. What would you say especially about connect? I think both me and some other guys might be a bit confused about that.

@Natasha Tori Maru `The relational problem to knowing failure: ` you mentioned for example woman to not be understood by mechanisms and I agree that we men can be too logical and analytical about things. A little bit autistic so to say. What would you suggest to be a clearer way for understanding besides pure logic?

So here is a daily report, we must have approached 50 girls that night, I barely remember anything that happend as I was in flow state with 0 thoughts in my head. Main thing I remember was singing Karaoke and making everyone jump. Now I have no voice left lol. This is my daily report, thought valuable to share, these. they are only the longer meaningful interactions that I remember, because I have approached atleast 50 girls, at the end of the night I knew everyone even all the guys lol, but it all is a vague memory. Attractive Black woman, like she was a 9 for sure, she was really hot and I appreciate how kind she was, I approached her and I felt my vibe being intimidated by her, so I completly switched gears to providing value/aka high vibe, showing the karaoke bar and selling to her how amazing it was, she was with her gay bestie and another girl. Then we left and later in the karaoke bar I talked in her ear and I told her she should go to the front, then she said she is waiting for her number, then I went perform and saw her looking at me like she saw a rockstar lol or maybe that is my own narcissistic interpetation. Two germans with the IoIs, these girls were funny, we started talking about their country and language, how we learn german in school but they don't learn dutch, that is so rude, lol. I made some playful accusations. Also I did a bit of push pull with my body language, eventually I saw the one german girl wanting to go inside, so I reengaged her and from there it started to bloom. I think that the other girl noticed that the girl started having IOI's because she dragged her away at the end, my wingmen still tried to get her number lol. When I got more in state I noticed both girls leaning towards me, that german girl touching me so I could literally feel that I was in state, even more then my wingmen. The germans who were smoking weed, I gave them a lighter and they were standing still, I think the best approach was with girls already standing still. All my approaches were indirect, I never did direct approaches, which was kinda good, but also it sometimes lead nowhere, like just socialising, when it should have been much more sexual or something, it is easier when you do this with a girl alone then in a two set, which is a bit harder and most girls are in two sets I guess. Atleast when you go outside where I approached, we didn't really went in a club. I think I am getting more practice with girls and I notice that when I am making it more dramatic like "no you must be lying", or "What the hell is that" or sus or so, like the balance is to be opiniated or an accusation, but still remain friendly and light, when you get too opiniated that can also get you further from having a friendly vibe. Too friendly and you are just an agreeable nice guy, yawn. The blonde girls that were from Groningen, these were the first girls that we had a longer convo with I am not writing all of this down in order lol, because this is the beginning of the night. And mainly my wingmen carried them, for me it was my first longer set so I was a bit stuck in my head when talking to them, also because I was intimidated by their beauty, they were really pretty, but also quite friendly which was kinda mindblowing to me. They were a big group of 8 or something The south african ladies, these girls were with allot of personality, in a positive way, they had something to them, most girls were just a bit boring to talk to at times, but also you got to carry the party, sometimes I was talking to pretty girls, but they were adding so little to the convo, that my natural energy was like, leave, this is boring. I left the conversation after some time, because I wasn't attracted to any of them, while my wingmen said I should have used them for social proof later, which we could have done, I guess. The girls in the row eating fries, it was so funny this girl seemed so in tune with me more than almost any girl I saw that night and yet I felt like she was with her boyfriend or something I dabbed up the guys she was with and it was a funny thing. I should have figured out the situation, because if it wasn't for the guys she was with, I would have definitely atleast got to kiss her, she was lighting up from talking to me. The girls at the cafe, wasn't too crazy, just some chit chat about dancing and preparing to go to bigger clubs and some other bullshit, honestly was a bit boring so I left after 5 mins. the vibe girls, so I saw a video where Owen said to girls "are you a vibe?" so I wanted to try that out and these girls really were proving themself to me that they were a vibe, it needs a bit of nuance, because I was involving my wingmen and he said to me "they don't like karoake so I don't know if they are a vibe", it kinda killed the vibe. I think without him saying that it would have worked better, as they were really trying to convince me that they were a vibe. Total conversations lasted like 15 mins to 10 mins or so. Besides that had much shorter less significant interactions which were positive, but those I don't feel of much importance to share. I might also post my night out tomorrow, I will just reply to this post with my second night out, first time doing night game seriously in a while, I mainly do daygame. But night game is so fun, so much more fun honestly, sadly you can't really find the right girls there tho.

@Joseph Maynor yes tonight I went out and felt that nothing really mattered what I said, my energy was just positive. I even told a girl "You look depressed" because she did, then she smiled and said thank you sincerly. HAHAHA she thought I was making a compliment, because my vibe was so positive. So energy is very important. I think why I wrote this down, is that sometimes you get stuck after you stopped them and then don't know what to say, so just talk. Like you stop them like "YOOO you seem Swedish" and then they respond a bit and in the beginning you sometimes freeze and don't have anything to say, so then it is best to just talk whatever.

@LordFall oh yeah I heard that saying before, never looked into it.