28 cm unbuffed

@Michael569 Great advices man, my main issue right now is - I don't have a fucking girlfriend or money and for most of the people that's the indicator if you are developed or not.

@Michael569 I was wondering today - it's been like 2 years, when I first started doing Leo's course and 1 year after I finished it. I made huge progress in this time, that's for sure. My question is - when do you think you'll be ready to start your bussiness, whatever it is? Like - how to determine the moment when you can honestly say to yourself - "ok, right now I'm ready to start it". I don't mean marketing knowledge (that too ofc), but more like - if my purpose is starting self-development YouTube channel, what would you say I have to accomplish to be ready for that, reliable is the best word here I guess.

@Shin having sex without busting a nut aka nofap lvl 2 btw: weren't you curious to google it and check for yourself? writing "i don't know" took you longer and didn't bring anything lol

@Shin I saw you're into nofap mate, how about karezza?

@Eph75 Whoopsie ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Knowing < understanding

Question is - do we really need Leo to agree on that? Can't we just create an Actualized forum Discord aka mastermind group ourselves?

Just talk to someone, anyone you can at least call and tell them, that you need someone to talk about your problems (if you can't meet with anyone in person). What you need is katharsis, not keeping your emotions inside. If you don't have that option - just start running, hitting a gym, boxing, anything that will help you to cleanse yourself from negative emotions, forget and move forward. Good luck, stay strong

As @Meetjoeblack said - sure, forgive her, in your own mind, and move on. Forgiving the other person makes you forgive yourself and undestand yourself better - because it's not always one's person's fault 100% (don't blame yourself tho). It also makes thoughts about this person dissapear from your mind and that way you use that energy for productive thoughts to push your life forward. Esoterically speaking, I heard that focusing on someone and thinking about them is like sending them free energy and I must say - this theory might be actually true - how many times you heard a story about a "boy that became a man after breakup epic transformation hype montage". The moment, when you stop focusing on others and start thinking and acting for your own good is the moment you become unstoppable. Good luck, stay strong. PS. About the love part you still see there, watch this, it might be it (it was in my case) : Aka - bitch loved me so much and didn't love herself at all, that she did some nasty shit, just to make me suffer, just to test my love. Nevertheless - that's fucked up shit, I'm out

@DivineSoda Great advice, thank you, Lord Soda ?

@-Rowan Depends on your knowledge about purpose and life in general aka how much society brainwashed you. There are a lot of useful concepts, knowledge, exercises and tools. It's definetely worth it's price. Tons of material. But, if you are already productive, goal-oriented, ambitious guy, who's life is pretty good and just wants some change - it's not for you imo. I was like at the bottom, with zero knowledge about shit and totally ego driven, that's why I can say: it fucking changed my life.

@DreamScape Yeah, exactly. It's sometimes annoying, but I'm aware of how my mind operates - to do something, first, I have to find meaning behind it. Like - when it comes to self - development, to even start, I had to find a meaning, an end goal, only after I discovered concept called enligthenment I got interested in working on myself (even though right now I know there is no "end goal"). Same to money, women etc - I don't see any value in it per se. Getting money and financial stability is something I want to do to feed my reptilian brain and sense of security, so I can become more courageous and open myself to a world around me more - for example with starting Youtube channel. Getting better with women is not for sex and pleasure either - it's more about getting more mature and grown man in a process. I really came down to earth after dealing with these traumas, emotions, patterns, insecurities. Like - what was I doing and thinking about my whole life? I wasted it, sitting in front of computer screen, just getting more knowledge, out of fear of "getting out there".

@Vipassana I stopped eating meat, not for ethical reasons or morality. The way, that animals are treated nowadays, makes meat quality really bad - animals that suffer, have a lot bad hormones in their body, because of the fear and pain they had to go through (aka bad karma). About protein intake - don't know, gotta make a reasearch by myself, but I always was a believer of an amount of grams of protein, that you have to take * body mass, to make better results. Right now, I'm not even hitting the gym, I'm don't have any diet per se and I look fucking fantastic, I'm just too thin. Neverthelless - going to try out different stuff and find out on myself.

These are the habits that I'm going to implement this year, most of them are already part of my life, but I'm not nearly as disciplined, as I wish to be : Waking up from 4 to 5 AM Drinking water with lemon and salt right after I wake up Meditation (at least 20 minutes a day) Wim Hof breathing session everyday Sun salutation exercise after waking up 5 km run every morning Cold showers Healthy, nutritious breakfast, rich in fat and protein Hitting gym 3-4 times a week Journaling about my thoughts and feelings+ grattitude journal everyday Reading 1 hour a day Nofap Spending 15 - 30 minutes actively on Actualized.org forum everyday Planning next day the night before These are things, that I want to accomplish this year, goals : Reduce the time, that I spend sitting in front of computer screen, just reading / watching Youtube videos, without any action. I wasted enough of my life, just accumulating more knowledge, not doing anything productive with it. In this era we all are spending tons of time in front of computer screens, you cannot avoid that, but I just want this time to be action based, not just about consuming more information. Going full vegan (going to stay with eating eggs probably) - it's already the case tbh. What I think about now are cheat days - one day a month, when I can eat whatever the fuck I want, what do you guys think? Getting financial stability - I'm planning to move to another city soon, find new apartment there, create a budget plan, that I'll stick to, reading more about investing and money in general. Getting better with women - not sure yet, how I'll go about that. First I gotta get more financial stability and probably do a nose job at one point or another, that's my big insecurity that I gotta get rid of. Finances and women are my weak points tbh. Starting my own bussiness, related to self-development - probably a Youtube channel. Will do it for sure - not sure if I'm procastinating here, but I really would love to be disciplined and experienced with money / women for example FIRST, and only then teach others. I think being too idealistic is my something, that I have to get rid of, or I'll never start. Learn to play an instrument (probably a violin) and getting more creative in general. Creativity is something that I always felt inner drive towards, I'm very imaginative, funny, outside of the box thinking person and I never really used that. Big change needed here. Learn to cook quality, healthy meals for myself.

Hey man, just an idea that's on my mind for a while now - what do you think and do you practice cheat days? I'm going full vegan and I was thinking, if cheat day once a month, when I can eat whatever I want is a good idea. It's like treating your ego - dealing with an ego backlash, before it even happens.

@Raptorsin7 Try with anything, see how it goes. Say to yourself, that your main goal is to say your problems out loud to somebody else, for someone to listen and give you his perspective and answers. And for him to ask you about details, when you yourself didn't see blindspots. You know a lot about all of these psychological aspects of therapy, mind, ego, etc, it's probaly not something that therapist will give you anything valuable (like knowledge-wise), if you are on self-development journey for a longer period of time - at least from my experience. But it's worth the try - finding even one blind spot in your thinking or discovering one thing about yourself can change your life forever.

@LfcCharlie4 Thanks a lot for recommendations, they are big, didn't expect that from vegan bodybuilders lol.

@LfcCharlie4 Nah, never. I think you can still build muscle mass with OMAD but it's pretty hard, I saw that @Siim Land is doing it. What I need is building mass, like hard bulking, but I'm vegetarian now and I want to stay that way. Check my topic if you want:

@LfcCharlie4 How many meals do you suggest eating per day? Did you hear about OMAD?

@Holly Ann No, the thing is - you are too harsh on yourself and that way you want try harder then you can at the moment. And when you are not meeting your expectation you are going back to smoking weed, alcohol, etc. Be easy on yourself, small steps, one at a time. Relax, take a hot bath, whatever it takes to feel better about yourself. Think about this like that : "It's just a stage, it will pass, right now I don't feel that good about myself, but it will pass too. I have to work on myself - but it's not that easy and I'm building too much expectations on myself and that's counterproductive and it kills me. What I need the most is the self - love right now" About that - I think the thing that could help you the most right now is finding ANYONE you can talk to about your problems. Forum is great, but never as great as physical contact and conversation with another human being. Stay strong, much love

@Dan502 That's a mistake in your thinking. You can be mental masturbator, watching Leo's videos and writing forum posts all day and still be beta - blue pilled, dogmatic about women and money man living in momma's basement guy (aka stage blue). I know - because I was that guy and just reading a lot / watching self-development Youtube videos / posting forum posts doesn't make you green - that's just your ego telling you that. @Bryanbrax If you want to determine what stage you are REALLY at (not just in your mind, because f.e you developed spiritual ego and therefore money is bad), answer yourself these questions : - Do I have financial freedom, that gives me freedom to live a life that is aligned to my purpose? Or am I still living in wage slavery? - Do I have a girlfriend, that matches my looks and personality standards or I'm single, saying to myself, that I'm above that and I don't need sex or a girl to feel better about myself? - Do I have the looks that I want, that make me feel really confident guy. - Am I a guy, that people admire and look up to, as a leader and someone to rely on? These are things, that you can label as shallow or something you are above - but trust me - these are things that you need, doesn't matter what your life purpose is going to be. If you don't have them - you are not green yet, you are there just mentally, that's your ego saying you that. You can't just skip spiral dynamics stages, life doesn't work like that.

I must argue with what @Leo Gura wrote here. I chose the backwards path - i decided that I will love myself unconditionally first, no matter where I work or how much money / sex i have. And i came to a point, where I truly love myself without having all of these things. And right now i TRULY know what I want from life and using meditation for 2 years i reached spiritual awakening. I'm a heyoka empath (INFJ) and I'm following the backwards path, that is crazy for most of people but for me it's really wise approach. Only when you truly love yourself, you know what you truly want from life. I remember watching one of Leo's videos (one in which he is wearing white shirt for the first time) and he said something like - "now this work becomes truly passionate and what I want, before it was more of hard work and grind". So, basically, he was doing all of it forcefully, not because he loved what he does.

you always make the best decision you can at any given moment based on previous decisions that you made so everything was and will always be perfect, free will and determinism are one and the same god is all knowing so he cannot make mistakes you have free will that is predestined, you feel like you are deciding what you are doing but god loves you so much that he would not make you do anything wrong, so here you go - everything is scripted by god for you and you think you are the one who has the control

Yeah, meditation is the key. Anytime the thought about the past pops up - do not try to neglect it, or to argue with it - your subconcious mind doesn't get it and you are only keeping the thought alive that way. The thing to do, to get rid of this loop is to simply acknowledge it. See it - acknowledge it - let it go. But still, main problem is not with your thougths - they are generated by emotions stored in your body. So clearing emotions stored in your body is something you have to work on. Breath work, diet, exercises, hot baths, getting rid of bad habits. Simply everything that will work for you, to relax your body. You also might want to listen to this at night. This will make your mind bring you answers, about how to deal with that problem: Good luck, stay strong, it will go away eventually. When you will stop thinking about the past and focus on the future, your life will grow so fast, that you will be astonished by your progress. Having faith in a process is a key here.

@Girzo Don't worry, I got it all figured out. I just have to start doing it and see how it all works in real world. And I wouldn't call it technical details, it's about choosing a tool that I will probably spend next month with to build a website. And I'm not up to losing a month of my life for nothing. Btw, I already decided it's going to be Wordpress, I'm too damn ambitious and I would regret using easy, fast tool as Squarespace later. For sure. Edit: going for Squarespace. I like easy, intuitive solutions and Squarespace is exactly like that. I'm bipolar lol