Preety_India

So I have the concept of the 3 devils that are really helpful to me First is the scary devil or the red one, the one who spins evil and is cruel. This is the Snake. This is the conventional devil. I imagine this as a serpent. The second is the benevolent devil. This devil has red eyes. This is a protective devil who protects everyone. I imagine this as a young girl with fiery red eyes who loves staring at me. She stares at my soul. She knows my fiber. I'll call her Scary Red Eyes. The third devil is the Quirky Girl. She knows how to play tricks. She is the girl in the orange shirt. The quirky girl loves creating new strategies. She is smart and clever and sassy.. The last is the iceman. He looks old but strong. He has strong values. He loves living in the mountains ice covered and hunts and eats and survives. But he is chill, his philosophy is deep. He just keeps to himself.

Lol @ tiny Robbins

Watched a tiny Robbins video

Hello!

Have a flow in your words

Yep definitely.

They are very sneaky. They try to plot to get you to feel guilty no matter what how much ever you help them.. For example with my ex, when he asked me for money and I offered him that, he would later tell me that it was my fault that I helped him even when he wanted me to help him They lay blame for every little thing. The biggest joke was when he told me that I will kill him one day. That is the day I decided to break up and leave him because he won't stop false accusations. I had reached a point in that relationship where anything that was bad that happened to him was my fault. If he fought with his parents, it was also my fault even when I didn't know his parents. It became impossible to deal with his behavior because he would plot things so that I can be blamed later. For example he would purposely tell me a different time to meet him and then pretend like I turned up late and that he was waiting a long time although I had reached the place at the time he had asked for, but later he would deny that he said that. Arguing with him was impossible because for anything, he will deflect and constantly change his story. The goal is to play victim in different ways even when the truth is different.

What you're describing is an example of what is known as a vulnerable narcissist. They will always tell you that everything is your fault. Also they will make victim playing scenario to trap you. I had an ex like that. It's difficult to spot One thing they do is always try to tell you that they are better than you and teach you every little thing. Also they are very contradictory. They will oppose anything you say.

Survival is not just basic survival. It's a lot of things Basic survival Survival guide both physical and mental Survival against

This is the same way you would live inside a rabbit hole. Don't go too deep Use a survival guide Protect yourself from the harsh weather outside. But at the same time whenever there is water inside this rabbit hole, stick to the walls so the water runs down and doesn't touch you. This is a great survival mechanism.

Maybe look for holes in the walls of the tunnel.. Whenever the water comes in, immediately sit in the holes of the walls so that the water doesn't touch you. This is like living on the edge of a knife.. It's also an escape trick.

Imagine if you are in a tunnel and water keeps gushing into the tunnel to the point that it can destroy you What will you do?

Remember this thread. The forum is a complex place. Language and communication are equally complex.

Hey I participated enough in this thread. Time for me to do journal. Bye bye.

They might need to invest into therapy for healing. Despite therapy if they don't heal then they're in damage mode. Nobody can help them at that point. Even they themselves can't help themselves because they are stuck in trauma mode and are unable to get out. Trauma processing is no magic. It needs a lot of hard work and patience. The mind is also like a body. If you hit the body, then at a certain point your muscles will break or tear off, then it's a damaged body and the damage can be temporary or permanent. The mind is also like the body. If the abuse is strong, the mind reaches a point of no return and the damage done to the psyche can be severe and sometimes permanent. Such people are like basket cases. They usually get obese over time, give into self destruction finally leading to death because the mind's impact on the body is huge where ultimately the body stops functioning normally because of extreme stress caused by the traumatized mind (but this only happens in severe cases of abuse, normally most people recover with lots of patience and therapy)

You're not getting my point. Someone who is healing might be feeling better for example a child who has been in foster care. Yet thy want justice for whatever emotional abuse they went through with their parents or bullies. When the said perpetrators are punished for their abusive behavior that also helps in knowing that such people won't be getting away with their actions. This assurance also greatly helps in healing.

@tsuki you too. Hugs.

In a court of law, such pieces of evidence are actually analyzed by independent experts, jury and psychologists. By your logic, the whole field of psychology should be thrown out. It's not just interpretation by the self alone but by everyone who knows how abuse functions.

I'm sorry but victims need justice. That's why law and justice exists or else perpetrators will keep doing what they do, knowing that they won't be brought to justice.

If you think so. But not everyone thinks in an ultra spiritual way where they think others don't exist psychologically. And yes you can prove things. Look into cases of abuse where there are tape recordings or written text conversations or multiple occasions of same behaviors repeated by the person and people coming forward about it.

She is my hero. This one is a hero too

The first case obviously looks like a dismissal to me. Lack of being attentive or lack of listening. The second is a case of gaslighting because even after being confronted with what was being done, they chose to deflect accountability rather than own their actions. Also casual lip service is just another form of lack of ownership or downplaying the level of damage caused by minimizing it.

This is actually a very important point

There are a lot of people who don't know understand what gaslighting is to begin with. They remain stuck in confusion for years until someone tells them that what they are experiencing is gaslighting for example children who get gaslighted by parents. The thing that you're talking about where someone is simply throwing accusations is an example where they come up with zero evidence to prove it. It is easily understandable that the person might be bluffing about it because when told to show any proof they come up with nothing.