Preety_India

I created this stage red characters because I don't want a real life stage red guy. He will kill me. So i need a fictional stage Red boyfriend character. I already created him. And I call him Porco

Didn't I talk about immersing myself in a dream? Maybe his sexual energy will cure me?

Didn't I say that I needed a stage Red boyfriend to fuck my feelings. Did I forget that?

My favorite picks this week.

@MusicalMillipede liberate yourself from the thoughts that are holding you hostage. You are a free bird and a beautiful person. Don't let your thoughts create a prison for you. Instead defeat those thoughts. You frankly don't need anyone. It's an illusion of the mind. All you ever need is yourself. Wake up to yourself everyday and see the beauty within you that you have always been ignoring.

I need a boyfriend fix!!

@seeking_brilliance Goodnight

@seeking_brilliance could you reach out to me in pm

Climate change is not a conservative ideal

Huh??? Really?? You could have at least given me some resources or at least one example to pacify my question. What a cop out!!!

Give me examples or it didn't happen!!!

Not surprising anymore. Name some conservative things that aren't dumb. Now don't answer "plenty of things."

I felt like I deserved all the bad things that happened to me

Then one day she opened up to me and told me how she was sexually abused as a child, she was just 4 years old and a guy who was 12 years old took her to a strange place and raped her. I felt very bad for her.. But that wasn't an excuse.

Recently I confronted my mom about all these things she did, and like any typical abuser, she denied everything as though she didn't remember any of that. I sometimes felt like it was better if she was just dead.

And my mom would do some messed up sexual things to me. She found me cute. She would often tell me how cute I was while putting my clothes on me. She would touch me inappropriately and make it seem normal. I did not understand at the time that it was something wrong. I just accepted whatever she did as a part of her affection. She would often touch me there..... And I was just a kid. She would make me talk to men, absolute strangers men who I didn't want to talk to, but she would encourage me to talk to these much older adult men when I was just a kid like 8 years old. It sort of made me feel very unworthy and violated

I recently told my sibling about that incident and they told me to not tell anyone else.

When I told my ex Joseph about that incident he said to me that it was seriously messed up. I didn't deserve that So i went through some messed up stuff that made me feel ashamed of myself. I thought everything was my fault. There was no sense of boundary or respect left Every boundary was violated. My mom would often shame me

4 The other incident that I remember very painfully and it always brings tears to my eyes everytime I think about it. I was just 11 years old. And one day I got my period.. And I told my mom that I needed to change and wear a pad. A sanitary pad. And my mom dragged me into a room where my dad was. He was on the phone so he wasn't looking. And she told me to strip naked. And change the pad. And I was very hesitant to leave the room. Because I felt intensely uncomfortable and nervous. At which point she forced me to undress myself..i was looking at my dad hoping that he won't be looking at me. And he wasn't looking at me and he hadn't noticed what she had said because he was on the phone. And that was a saving grace. So i did what she commanded. I got naked and stripped. And I changed my pad. And put my clothes back on. I felt absolute garbage after leaving the room. It was very traumatic incident for me I felt like my sense of being, worth, identify, value were completely violated It was seriously sexually abusive and messed up whatever she did to me.

How would you describe a typical stage red boy /man?

One incident that I feel very shameful about is this - This is regarding Joseph my ex boyfriend. Like once while having sex, he said to me that I should call him Daddy. And I did that. Later I felt a bit ashamed of myself. Because I didn't want to do that or maybe I wanted to do but not in that fashion It felt very dirty. Yea.. It felt very dirty.. After that I was a bit shameful while having Sex. Like - what am I doing??? The othe incident that I remember with my ex, was... He was lashing out at me. He was too angry. And I told him something like - you can rape me as a punishment but please don't leave me He was just stunned. He guilted me for it And I felt horrible. Like it was such a shameful thing to do.. These two incidents is something l regret. Deeply. I feel very ashamed thinking about it.

That sounds good!

@EddieEddie1995 then what positive things they do that make them stand up from other stages Because pretty much what you just described as positive aspects are found in all stages as well. That didn't look positive really, just neutral and vague.

I'm trying to fix my broken self.