Preety_India

Thank you for the kind words. I'll forgive her eventually, it's only a matter of time. My goal is to reconcile with her at some point. I won't let her die without closure. I have always cared for her, taken her to doctor visits, stayed during her surgeries, cooked her meals, took her to dentists appointments. It's only that I have some revenge/resentment for how she raised me with abuse and how she mistreated my dad in front of me. But I have learned that this was her bipolar. One day I had an open discussion with her and she said that her bipolar made her act in strange ways and become cruel to everyone in the family. She used to adore me as a child until she snapped and started getting weird and very psychotic and maniacal. Recently she agreed to take bipolar medication. She is showing some good signs yet last month she was violent with me in the middle of the night. She pulled my hair, grabbed my neck, shoved me into the wall and began hitting my head. I have taken a lot of her behaviors very patiently over the years. I just pray that she gets well and stops her maniacal behavior. After that I will forgive her and let her be in peace. I have nothing against her because she is my mother. But things went very wrong between me and her and my father's death many years ago exacerbated my already growing resentment against her. I hope she gets better and understands that as a daughter i care about her.

@eaaaeaeae

the black pill is a nice way of saying i can't get a girl because I j̶u̶s̶t̶ d̶o̶n̶'t̶ t̶r̶y̶ t̶o̶ a̶p̶p̶r̶o̶a̶c̶h̶ t̶h̶e̶m̶ don't look good.

I'd recommend eating a light meal 4-6 hours before the trip, something like a salad and some fruit. Make sure you're hydrated and get some grapes. Grapes are a wild snack on any hallucinogen. Don't do fasting because you might go yuck yuck and nauseous during a trip.

Some solutions from my end - Remove money from American politics Stop corporate funding of politicians Elect honest politicians Stop lobbying Gather people Start political activism Collect funds through charity Make politicians sign laws to punish corporations. Boycott goods and services Keep doing till corporations give up and lose power Halt leakage of chemicals into environment. Make communities aware and stronger in fighting for change

Oh wow. 10%. You have such great memory.

My mind often stays blank unless I'm engaging myself in something. It's tough when I wake up in the morning.. I'm trying to bring positive changes to my life and the process is incredibly slow because my mind feels numb. Part of this might have to do with stress/trauma response. So the blank state stays for quite some time, nearly an hour until I jolt myself back out of it, snapping out of it,this happens on its own. Have you felt this way and what practical tips do you suggest to keep the mind in order and not have to suffer this constantly. Forgetfulness Absent mindedness Blankness Stress Avoidance Unawareness

The other thing to understand is to create your own unique print where you do things that upgrade your art and craft in front of the world.. This way you have your own uniqueness and you don't have to rely much on validation from someone or anyone. You don't have to suffer this way.. You get to be your own self and stop needing validation to feel better. You're already validated by your craft. Aren't you? You need not worry how you appear to someone or if they care about you? You don't rely on it anymore. Sometimes hatred is a good thing. You don't have to explain someone too much. They get the idea that you are too far away for things to work. Also diplomacy is a great quality to possess.. With diplomacy you're handling things correctly. Emotions kinda throws all diplomacy out of the window. Always remember to check yourself whenever you're looking for validation. It never serves a good purpose. It's a highly complicated reward mechanism that undervalues your true potential and value, infantilizes you , gets your neural chain addicted and keeps you in a perpetual "low self esteem" state.

One thing that you need to focus on is allowing someone to meet you in your own space, in your own form, in your own skin. This is one of the most crucial self esteem lessons.

@DrewNows ?❤️

You have to consider that these guys want to attract maximum number of girls.. How will you convince them that all girls aren't for them?

Included "problem solving."

@Bob Seeker what sort of unconscious business are we really talking about here? Can you be a bit specific because it appears a bit vague? Do you have an idea in mind?

Problem solving should also be included in this map. I want to set up an organization like Actualized Org and call it Eminent Consciousness Org.

I have to invest in the following A great career Life purpose Reading books Articles, Blogs and podcasts Videos making and listening Learning Gathering ideas and brain storming Listening Art and expression Spirituality Health Cooking

I have to follow this Map from now on.

@Federico del pueblo if I were you I'd listen to @Harlen Kelly

@Preety_India This is a good one. It summarizes a lot of things that are going on in my mind right now. This is the new direction of my spirituality. My spirituality was always along these lines but I had to reinvent it.

Yea they are horrible. I just remind myself that I have to stay strong.

I might be a Leo puppet in other areas of his work, but I am not a Leo puppet when it comes to his approach on dating and relationship. There I'm mostly independent. But in other areas I follow him like a mule.

Yep. I don't think my mother is evil But she traumatized my father and me. She is bipolar NPD.

@Zizzero hey, thank you so much for the words of encouragement.

Should your life purpose always be connected with generating or making money? Can it be something that you don't wish to make money out of like charitable work? Can this be considered a life purpose if you can't make money off of it or if you don't want to make money out of it ? Or is this too naive as an endeavour?

Keep in mind this map. Add diagram here. Post in progress.