Preety_India

The problem is fixed for me. I can now login properly as before and embed. Thank you so much.

Emotional processing disorder. EPD Endless emotional verbiage

I don't know exactly what was going through her mind. But she should have shown some degree of interest in you when you asked her to dance. The fact that she kept avoiding you the entire time is pretty odd given the fact that you said she was interested in you. I didn't find your behavior as very needy because it's the very first time and curiosity always gets the better of us and so imo she should have also displayed some curiosity on her part.. Your behavior was very instinctive because you didn't really plan it out through and man is very much slave to his instinct so I don't think you can change that in the future. Your overall behavior will stay the same because it represents the unique person that you are. If you have her contact and if you have been texting her or social media you can reestablish contact in the future but I guess you'll need to be a bit blunt because you got no time to waste entertaining her whims. If she is interested she should show a response or else it will be more like she is just playing along and she has got nothing to lose(btw) Right now you cannot do anything. You'll just need to wait. Be patient and let some more time go by before you make another approach. If she still gives you a cold shoulder I don't know how to feel about it. But in whatever way you decide to approach her, make your intentions known not right away but after some time, because there's no point in wasting your time in trying to chase someone who doesn't correspond equally. Imo it should be mutual interest on both sides and the interest needs to be quite strong for things to take a solid turn. Don't beat yourself. You haven't messed up badly, lf your emotions showed, it's fine, neediness is a much bigger thing than a single situation of dance. And as you know, persuasion is necessary in relationships so nothing wrong with being persuasive as long as it is within the zone of comfort. .

Write a sentence like a self enquiry questionnaire. Did you do? Answer - yes. Finished.

Emerald on this forum has helped me so much. She is very very inspiring. I learned a lot from her. I feel very grateful for having met people who inspire me in every way possible little or big. So I came across her concept of keystone habits. I'm going to put that into action in my life to get some results. I will keep a diary to record my keystone habits. I'm not sure how successful I can be in this.. Because I'm a bit of an eccentric. So I get all over the place and do anything that takes my fancy at the moment.. But I will try to be more disciplined and less erratic. Thank you Emerald.

Wrote this on November 11

The rest are all skerts Pizzizi Dizel didacted to fork via Imgflip Meme Generator via Imgflip Meme Generator

Some important concepts out of the above One important concept is creating a structure. "Structural Assembly" Psychological affinity Brain programming Reward mechanisms Mindful curation Absolute control and Absolute discipline

And also added to the list Keystone Daily

????Focus cards ??? ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️ ? Umbrella list or atomic list ? Sequence notes ?Daily pins ? Major Goals Focus cards ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️ ? Umbrella list or atomic list ? Sequence notes ?Daily pins ? Major Goals

Recap of concepts

Sorry to hear about whatever you went through. Healing through so much trauma will not be easy. You need to resolve your inner shadow. Your inner shadow is expressing itself as anger and revenge. Self love can be built by working on your self esteem, standing up for yourself, objecting to behavior which is hurtful to you, being yourself and understanding that you deserve as much love and affection as anyone else. Your inner bitterness directed to the perpetrator will continue as a hurt cycle and continue to hurt you for as long as you allow it. Try to let it go because now the whole thing is pointless. If you get vengeful feelings it means you haven't truly moved on. In order to truly move on from that brutal experience, you'll have to understand that it shouldn't be allowed to have any hold on you, even remnants of it. Liberate yourself from the hold of anger and revenge because such emotions create toxic vicious cycles in life and you get caught into them and the cycle continues. I understand the need for justice. But when justice doesn't exist, you need to be strategic and cut your losses by withdrawing from the need to seek justice. You'd only bring more harm and pain to yourself the more you pursue it. It's like talking to walls. Whatever happened happened. Now it has made you twice as much conscious about toxic and abusive people which is good. Start your healing journey by practicing Letting Go and Acceptance of the Past. You were wronged. It's their bad Karma. You weren't responsible for it. Whenever the reaction/temptation to seek revenge occurs, try to tell yourself how much you love yourself and that the feelings of revenge are not worth your attention and time. They only perpetuate the grief. This does not mean that you are forgiving that person. It only means that you no longer that no longer allow yourself to be victimized any further by the trauma and anguish of your past/incident and the resultant anger/bitterness it creates. Say to yourself that you are independent emotionally and that you don't need to seek validation through expressing your anger/revenge. It's like a dried branch that can be cut off and thrown out of you. You no longer need it and it doesn't serve your purpose.

They are all incels. I'm outta here lol

@modmyth me too

Hey I care about you. This is not about triggering you. It's about sorting differences and seeing things in a new way. So that it helps you get a better perspective on things. That's all. Nothing personal intended. I believe you are an extremely good person in real time and I can sense that, just that certain things you hold true look more misguided than true, and rooted in fantastical beliefs but reality is a little different. If you have never been in a relationship, it's obvious that you won't know a lot of things and everything will be very rhetoric in your mind. I get that. But lack of real experience brings lack of maturity. Sharing your beliefs with other people helps in knowing where you are going wrong because eventually knowing the right thing is only going to help you not hurt you I was only trying to help.

When your suffering is demonized rather than being valued.

Don't rely on dating coaches for such things. Maybe you could a pick up a thing or two from them regarding attracting the opposite gender for the first few dates and etiquettes but don't rely for relationship advice. For that you need experience. You have to be in a relationship and find your way through it and learn a new lesson as you go along. Sometimes its good, sometimes it's tough and miserable but even a bad relationship or a relationship failure is still worth the lessons you Learn You can't fight a real battle by reading a book on how to do it. You will have to be in the battlefield learning the nuances and those little tidbits will be hugely different from what a dating coach will give you. Consulting a Dating coach is like a woman wearing a wig. Sooner or later the wig falls off.

You're confusing showing affection with neediness. Showing that you are invested is a sign of your commitment and loyalty and your interest in the other person. Neediness is crossing this line and displaying excessive need to want to have that person's attention 24/7 to the point that it gets toxic. It also represents not only interest but also desperation. Nobody likes a desperate person because their motivations aren't genuine most of the time. Therefore a needy person may appear more selfish than attentive. Depriving the other person of your affection is causing huge damage to the relationship. It won't work. You can't measure a relationship like a transaction where you accurately jot down how much she is invested and how much you should in return. You have to give your 100 percent which means you can't afford to show that you're uninterested and also not make it look like a transaction or deal where you'll only give her measured attention and then withdraw it when you think it's enough. That would piss her off. Instead give her your maximum attention when you can but make sure that it comes out of a need to make her happy rather than fulfill your own egoic needs. For example if she wants to run an errand, that's where you must let her go, and if you don't then you are being egoic. In this situation, a man truly invested will not show indifference but will simply let her have her way because he cares. Yet an egoic person will try to be needy and controlling like a child and get obsessed or demanding. And a transacting man will immediately drop out or show indifference because she isn't available so he will do the same like tit-for-tat.. A woman's senses are strong and she can sense when a man is being needy and when he is uncaring. You have to be able to differentiate neediness and caring/investment /commitment because there is thin line between the two and this line is only because of the motivation behind the behavior. A needy man can easily comes across as caring If he is showing concern for every little need/desire/activity of the woman. A very simple example is this. If a man says to a woman "where are you?" It could be because he is concerned and wants to know if she is safe. Or it could be his need to know about her every move, which is needy and controlling So a lot depends on the motivation. You're confusing and conflating the terms neediness and investment/commitment /attention. See it clearly.

He is trying it a very stereotypical dating coach way which probably works when you are trying to attract a woman but not within the confine of a relationship. Attraction can work as a short term game and might make a guy feel good like he finally won her attention for some time or got a thumbs up from her. But long term, like you said, she will see through it. And obviously she won't appreciate his constant lackluster response. The usual feeling that a woman gets is "maybe he doesn't love me if he isn't that invested"... He is thinking along the line of 'women like alpha abusive bad boy' but if it were really true then all women would suffer from battered woman syndrome lol. In my opinion if a woman is playing too hard to get, as he is seems to be suggesting, then she is just not worth it, because her true intention must be nothing more than attention-seeking, a woman truly in love would not play hard to get, because she really wants the relationship to work. The women who play those games where they drain the man's energy are, like Anna said before, emotional energy sucker women who love to feed on someone's energy to feel important, in some ways this is a representation of narcissism in a woman that shows itself in more repressed ways, and a man gets suckered into her game playing, it's no different than a man using narcissistic abuse to control a woman.. I feel like mikael probably at some point has suffered a relationship with an abusive partner(narcissistic female) constantly playing games and instead of recognizing it as an unhealthy relationship structure, he ingrained it as a normal behavior of the female gender and justified dealing with it using the "bad boy" distant, "don't be more interested in her than she is" strategy to level with that unhealthy behavior of the opposite gender. Now a normal woman would never like such a behavior from a man. However an emotionally unbalanced woman might like it because she her perspective is abnormal and screwed and through her perspective it might seem attractive. This is a like a person who has robbed a bank talks to a shoplifter and obviously the shoplifter is going to be in awe of him. But if the bank robber spoke to a normal person, they wouldn't approve his behavior.

So true. Couldn't agree more.

A silly question that I need to ask myself is "how does it matter?"

Affection is like weed

If you take ting seriously you'd get screwed. And you're getting carried away by tibby being terts You need a Tupper that will always give you a thumbs down.

Only one flaw.. Gang tiggying

Isn't anything possible out of nothing? Started by Preety_India, Yesterday at 02:11 PM Reply to this topic Moderation Actions 3 posts in this topic Preety_India Topic Starter Member 2,494 posts Posted yesterday at 02:11 PM (edited) · I have lately come across a lot of judgement in this section with regard to qualities and looks and everything else. I'm a strong believer in the possibility of anything and everything. I feel God has a purpose in our lives. And we can make anything out of nothing. Do you believe that anything and everything is possible out of nothing. I feel that a lot of the sentiments and judgement that people express here especially about women arise from negativity. Negativity only restricts us and creates dissonance. It shows the impossibility of everything rather than the infinite possibility of every minute particle in the universe. Be careful how you judge others because you might end up judging yourself the same way if you're in their shoes. Or you might turn into a hypocrite. Either ways it's harmful. Try having positivity in your life and maybe you won't judge the opposite gender or another race so much. Preety_India Topic Starter Member 2,495 posts Posted yesterday at 05:01 PM · On 11/29/2019 at 3:59 PM, Dumuzzi said: It is negativity, yes, but also just pure, unadulterated materialism. If all you care about are having sex with hot chicks and becoming rich, you are no better than the mass of humanity. Maybe it's an age thing too, but that's the vibe I get from a lot of young men (more like boys) here. That crass materialism and identification with the body is about as far away from true spirituality as you can get. So true. Perfect. Yes I never looked at it that way. That was an amazing insight