Preety_India

This is almost like a cascade model for spirituality Self honesty Self awareness Self introspection (shadow work and self enquiry) Self love Self growth

A quality that I hugely lack is self introspection. So along with self honesty (raw and uncut), self introspection also contributes hugely to spiritual growth. The following are key points. Self honesty Self awareness Self introspection (shadow work and self enquiry) Self love Self growth

When Leo becomes that enlightened, he will achieve Mahasamaadhi. Then whoosh he will disappear. How can we enjoy his presence here then? So it's better if his total consciousness is delayed as much as possible.

My ex boyfriend used to always call me a bit odd and weird. Well, honestly, I can attest to that. I'm weird for sure.

The other thing that I wanted to discuss is self honesty. Pure raw and uncut self honesty leads to greater self awareness. Being sneaky about the self is like bypassing the most important milestone on a spiritual journey.. A lot of spiritual masters want to be ahead of the game and master different techniques but when it comes to pure raw self honesty, they get lame and back off. This is a huge hurdle in spiritual growth and I see it as a thing that evades most spiritual scholars and practitioners and practically handicaps them in the direction of spiritual growth So you kind of get the feeling that they are really great and well rounded and brilliant in their spiritual work but lack at the most basic feature of spiritual Mastery. I see a lot of journal writers on here being exceptionally self honest and raw about it. That's a good beginning something that I need to cultivate as well. I'm honest but not fully. My self awareness is still lacking. When you are fully and substantially honest with yourself and in your writing, ( which is a skill on its own), it really Kickstarts your self awareness and takes it many notches higher.. (sorry for my bad English, duh!!) This self awareness is crucial in fixing the self and an important component of emotional and spiritual growth.. Like I said, a lot of people just bypass it. Just mastering techniques is not spirituality.

Yea... Making that post was like a milestone moment for me. That was the first time ever that I even thought about self love in a more serious way. It instantly spearheaded or short-circuited my emotional healing. First time in my life I got a breakthrough after a lot of tedious soul searching. A pat on my back.. Good job girl. ❤️

Got it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Searched through all my posts quickly and found this one. This one was made exactly on April 16... So here is the reason why I was so happy on that day. Because i created those exercises and talked a bit about self love. Hahhahahah I knew it would be some odd reason.

I think the reason must have been that I felt free of all judgement. I don't know. I'll have to look through each and every post in all the journals to know for sure. This is a difficult task so I'll put it for later. When something gnaws at my mind, it just doesn't leave me

I have no idea why I was feeling so happy and put together on April 16 There must have been some reason, possibly an odd one, but it escapes my mind. It's important to timestamp posts (which I always always forget) so I can keep a track of my emotional states in a more exact manner.. If I'm sad I really want to know the reason. If I'm happy I really want to know the reason. I have no memory of the reasons. I just know that I was feeling very happy that day. My memory is so messed up because of the relationship stress I suffered, I don't remember anything much at all these days. Hopefully my memory will reset itself and I won't have such a hard time again.

This song simulates my overall personality so much. It combines all the forms within me, the need to be by myself, the need to pull away, the feeling of being violated in some way. I see different aspects of my personality in this song being played out at different times. Like some places where I'm strict with who I am and some where I just don't care about anything at all. The entire theme of me switching from agression to softness, being this strong person in one minute and then being a vulnerable person in the next moment is so well captured in the song. Also this need for me to be in an ethereal world where I don't feel judged anymore is artistically expressed in the song especially in the part where she moves her fingers and sits there not caring for anything but own self expression, a constant theme throughout my life and my personality. The song constantly brings out the me in me which is a pleasant surprise because I listen and watch so many songs every day but none of them had an impact on me or made me closer like this one. When I watch this song and the whole layout of the video, it instantly reminds me of me, in an artistic way, overlapping and combining different aspects of my personality into one whole. Also the rapid changes in frames throughout the song coincide perfectly with the rapid changes I experience in my thought process from time to time.. I've never been able to resonate with a music video this much before. I didn't even pay attention to most, but somehow this one captured the essence of my personality and it stood out the most for me. Who knew that I would find a music video and see glimpses of my personality in it.. So unpredictable. I usually do not philosophize much on the stuff I come across but this one needed a special mention because I relate so much to me. Been quite a long time since I was able to relate to a song. I don't listen to mainstream music as much as I used to before, something about it has turned me away, their need to get views and instant fame and money has really cheapened the music industry today. Right now enjoying this video and seeing myself in it. Feels like glory.....

I think you're suffering from bias. This is visible in the fact that you snoop on their conversations with a preset mind. Because all you are doing is looking for a confirmation of that bias. Someday if it happens that she gives you a look, you'd feel some sort of comfort that your bias was confirmed. Notice it's your own bias and has no ground on its own if you weren't thinking the way you do. You've to confront yourself. It's not your dad's girlfriend's fault. You have a shadow against her. Only you can resolve it. Make room for her in your mind where you accept her the way she is and for who she is and let her be free of your judgement. She is not subject to your judgement to begin with. Once you resolve this and bring acceptance, your guilt and subconscious hate will automatically resolve itself.

Taoist sexual

Today I was thinking about the different types of people that you came across during my morning meditation. And this insight came to me. Like how people come in different flavors all the time. Some people are funny, some are smart and some are superficial. Then there are those people who are real real, they never lose their realness no matter what and what they say is exactly what they mean. Such people leave an imprint, a mark on our lives. They are deep.. You can always appreciate and like the funny people but you can never deny the deep people who make big changes with their presence and greatness. You don't feel like you have to explain anything to these people, because they already know how you feel and deep down they care about you. You never have petty fights with them.. I've begun to appreciate such people. I got a quote in my mind that instantly connected to this philosophy and insight and this quote made perfect sense. I tried to imagine that those funny people were like sunshine whereas the deeper people were like storms. Even if sunshine makes you feel warm, the storms leave you with a lasting inspiration and influence I kinda fashioned a quote out of this thought. You can like the sunshine but you cannot stop the storm..

Ms and Ws and Js are 3 peas of the pod. Eating ice cream while...

A bold message to my ex You're a sociopath who used to feed on my softness and vulnerability. And thank God I finally left your mind games for good. You constantly kept telling me how awful it was for me to leave you. Ahhh!!!! The Gaslighting right there, so I shouldn't leave. If you feel upset because I dumped you, remember this.. It's victims who make the final decisions, not abusers. Abusers don't want the drama to end. Victims do.

I'm mostly green.. Some bits of blue and yellow in me in some areas as well. I see the forum as a mixture of red, blue green and yellow. Also orange. Green ~ 50% Blue ~ 20 % Red ~ 10 % Yellow ~ 10% Orange ~ 10% I don't know turquoise very well because I am not very acquainted with the turquoise types so didn't include that. But they might be making up the rest.

Even though today is a bad day and my emotions are in a knot, I still feel better because I have finally escaped the narcissistic abuse of my ex.

My weight tends to remain constant. Because I gain some weight and then the following weeks I lose the weight I gained. And then gain weight again. Then lose again. This constant ups and downs in my weight is very troublesome. My weight keeps fluctuating between 140 pounds and 130 pounds. It keeps flip flopping. Some days I'm 132 pounds. And then I'm back at 138 pounds. Then after a few weeks I'm back at 130 pounds. This cycle is not good for my health at all..

Do yesterday I get this feeling that I am having everything under my control. That everything is going to work out and that I will do fine.. And then this morning when I woke up, I was feeling distressed again. The same feeling of Helplessness and hopelessness. The same feeling of giving up. I started to lose my grip. Have you ever felt this way? Like you are falling off and losing your grip on things again. That you are losing weight or gaining weight and suddenly you have no more control on your life. And your emotions are distracting you from any kind of growth and you feel stuck and you begin to lose your hair and you feel weak and tired but you are still not doing anything to fix it because you feel like you can't or you feel like you need more time to feel emotionally okay or adjusted. I have had this happen many times to me. During these times I'm trying to distract myself with some book or art or just being numb waiting for time to go by. . It's an odd feeling. An emptiness, a lack of motivation. A feeling like "what's the point of doing anything good any way because everything is all bad anyway" This happens a lot to me.

I find it difficult to articulate emotions into words. I get clumsy with it. Part of it is because I was never allowed to talk as a child.. I used to keep silent most of the time. The only time I began to talk is when I started having boyfriends. They helped me open up a bit..

So yesterday I felt like I had this.. I had this within my grip. That everything is going to be alright finally. I suffered a lot of violence as a child.. Lot of emotional as well as psychological abuse.. It's difficult to feel normal after being raised to be broken.. And I today I woke up with nightmares where the same people are talking to me again. I saw my ex in my dream as well.. He was offering me advice but mocking me at the same time. So when I woke up I had a sort of a mental breakdown again.. Feeling nervous and depressed..

I have to do a lot of ranting and venting to get it off my chest because bottling up all the childhood abuse and relationship trauma inside is not good at all. I don't do a good job of venting. Because I still get sneaky about it. I still hide aspects of the abuse that hurt me and don't confront it. How betrayal feels like

There are days when I will go into rampage mode and keep posting a lot, one post after another.. It's writing one page and then tearing it off and writing another. I cannot contain my emotions in one post . So I'll make several short posts and throw my emotions into each one of them and as I make another one I feel a sense of relief that the previous one is done with.. I don't need to deal with that emotion again till it reappears.

As I try to gather pieces of my life, it's really and awfully hard to be back to normal again. There are days when I feel like everything is going to be normal and then there are days when I completely collapse under the weight of the trauma I suffered.. I just give up and sink into my shell not wanting to talk to anyone, not wanting to smile, hating everything around me. Hating the feeling that I have to live life despite all the ordeal.