traveler

Well that's good news

My question is, do you really want total liberation? It seems to indicate total oneness, total non duality. I myself enjoy experience a lot, and I don't know if I would be able to give it up. There is so much beauty in experience. Of course I can not know what the total liberation state might be like, but I've had a taste of some, and while it was liberating there where still a longing and a thirst for experience. This could be my ego though, how can I know.

Pretty refreshing to see a comment that doesn't focus on the all of the negative shit, it doesn't seem to do any good at all. Thank you ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

I work in a kindgarten, and there is this shy boy who is very sweet and gentle, he rarely does anything that we get mad about. Today when we we're outside, I was alone with the kid. Suddenly he said: "Once I was as tall as that tree," "what do you mean?" I asked. "In the old days I was as tall as that tree" he then said. I was very interested and asked further about this memory. He said that his name was "Pikant" or something like that and that he was 46 years old. I asked further "How did you die?" Then he said "you don't die, before I was in a big body, now I'm in a small body" Then I asked where he lived, and I'm pretty sure he said "Bordeaux" (remember this kid is danish and is 4 years old, this is almost impossible to make up, and he is not the kind of kid to joke around like that.) I was interested if he remembered how he died and then he said "In our cottage, it was the wall," I tried getting more out of him because I was so interested, but I couldn't keep his attention on it for much longer. After this I asked the table with kids that I was eating with "does anybody remember when they where in a big body?" and a girl said: "yes!" very fast and mentioned something about a circus. She was impossible to get more out of though. I just got home and looked this up on google, and I can see that It isn't that uncommon for kids to remember past lives. I just thought this was so interesting, especially for people in this forum. Kids a usually ignored and misunderstood, but If you really listen to what they are saying then there's a lot of things they know that we don't. That's my belief atleast.

I'm watching this documentary right now, it's about a boy remembering his past life and is visiting the place.

I'm not sure what you mean by "If this were a scene in a movie, how would it impact the rest of what the character will choose". I do see the significance though, it's just very interesting. (or did you mean, that the fact I wrote about it might have significance to my life?)

I have really enjoyed watching Mooji in the past, but I stopped a while back because it stopped feeling the same. I am extremely sensitive to energies, and there is definitely something that has changed in Mooji. His talks doesn't feel authentic anymore, when he speaks it is very cluttered and unclear, it feels like the words are just a repetition from all of his other talks with no power behind them. When you look in his eyes, there is really no light, they seem dead and dark. I'm not trying to spread rumors or any of that sort of thing, I'm just interested in knowing if I'm the only one noticing this. I have some examples: This interview is just weird. He looks uncomfortable, unable to connect with the other guy. No light at all in his eyes. He has a very noticable nervous twitch at 2:35. This is a long video, but I only watched the first 10 minutes, from the 3 minute mark to 10 minute mark. His words are incredibly entangled and unclear. He allows no space for his words to simmer. He seems very unsure of everything he is saying. REMEMBER - This is not to spread hate about mooji. - I KNOW that you shouldn't rely on guru's and all of that, I know there will be comments about that. But many people are relying on them, and when someone with such a big following is so obviously (obvious to me atleast) not abiding in peace, there is definitely something troubling about that.

This is pretty interesting

very possible Are you one of them? And have you spoken with them? He looks self conscious to me

My most profound awakening was listening to a mooji meditation on youtube. There is no doubt that he has been very authentic. The reason I made this post is because of how little he's resonating with me now. It's easy to talk the talk, but without any grace or power behind it, it is just that, talk. I made this post because of what my intuition told me. No view is the correct view though, and if he's resonating with you, then there's really no reason to listen to other peoples opinion.

I have dealt with this. You come to a place where not many people have come, and as you might have noticed this place can't be translated to people through words. When I first had a big awakening I was pretty scared, because it was like I had teleported into a whole other dimension. When I tried to explain what had happened to my sister she got very worried and she thought that I was going crazy just like you. I had a very hard time having no one to talk to about this to. I felt loneliness times infinity, because I realized that no one really exists, I couldn't eat the whole week. But no need to worry, I thought I was gonna be in this hell for eternity, and that wasn't the case. I learned to accept the loneliness to an extent and I now don't feel it the same way. Since then there has been a lot of growth on my part, and a lot of clearing, there is still sometimes some loneliness in the background but I don't let my mind run away with that feeling. We are essentially alone and we will be alone forever, it can be an unsettling message for the ego but if it is embraced it can bring more intimacy than you have ever experienced.

My biggest awakening experience I've had was when I was smoking weed alone on a bench in nature. I smoked it and my heart began beating really really fast. Suddenly it felt like my ego was glitching and I probably looked like an insane person as my reality began to shatter before my eyes. (Enlightenment was something I had pursued for a while, so It wasn't totally out of the blue.) I decided to lay down on the bench, and above me was a tree. I was listening to a guided meditation by mooji, and as I was laying there with my heart beating out of my chest, I felt like I was going to die. I emerged with the tree above me and the only way I can describe it is that it became infinite ongoing fractals and I was one with that. Suddenly mooji wasn't just a spiritual teacher in my ear telling me to relax and let go, but his voice became the voice of god talking to me, while I was "downloading" an insane amount of knowledge. I was very aware of my personal identity in this state though, and while being in total bliss and amazement, I was still aware of my ego saying stuff like: "so this is it?" accommodated with a feeling that all of my entire life had lead up to this exact moment, and I had in some way finally completed the game. It was a balance between total amazement and bliss with all of the out of this world knowledge I got, and a difficulty accepting this knowledge with an unfulfilling, and maybe a slightly panicked feeling. I have since been able to have glimpses of myself emerging with consciousness like this, I actually had an experience like that yesterday. But there is a fear of opening myself up to all of that love and energy, to totally leave all of my safety behind and emerge into this unknown thing. I guess you could say it's a fear of dying. But it seems to be the only thing holding me back. A question that has been on my mind for a while is that if teachers of non duality are emerged with this state, I can't see how they can ground themselves in this dual reality. If one is truly emerged in a non-dual state, then how come you can function like a totally normal person? This state seems to portray no sense of direction at all.

Yeah, it gets pretty damn tiring to be in your head all day. When I'm home I can relax and be mindful and all of that, but when I'm working it literally strips me of all my energy because there's old patterns of thinking and then the concepts of letting go and being present just doesn't help in those moments, they only make it worse. I work in a kindergarten, which is a pretty good place to work for spiritual growth and practice. Sometimes I can rest in awareness while being there and it's just beautiful to interact with the pure souls of the children and feel their love. But other times (often) you get gripped by your thoughts, and with the constant demand of attention from the kids and the loud screams and noise they make, it is almost impossible to find your way back to peace. I work 6 hours without a single break, and I'm just worn out after that. As you said I should probably just let this run its course, I don't feel like I have any control over it anyway.. hah

In the last half year or so spirituality has filled almost all of my life. It is said that there is no desire when you are freed from your ego, and I can totally resonate with that. When I'm resting in myself there is no desire. The seeming problem I have is that I'm now "not able" to make any "positive" changes in my life, because MY EGO is now desiring not to desire. I want to change up my bad habits, but I now have almost no self discipline at all, because "who is it that wants to change up their situation" right? I want to start training again, because I've been off it for quite a while now, and I'm getting a bit chubby. But when the thoughts come up about making a goal for myself I can see that it's probably just my ego that wants to look better and all that. I can see how my ego has so many different faces. One of the faces says "I have to start training, because I'll end up sick and fat with the situation I'm in now," the other face says "It's probably my ego who wants to grow through my desires to get better," another one says "What I'm doing on a daily basis now is also the ego, seeking pleasure in all of the vices I do, like vaping nicotine, eating unhealthy, playing games, and so on." My ego is clearly playing games with me, but there seems to be no definitive answer to this, other than just resting in awareness and let that take you where it wants to take you. It's all very contradictory. I would really appreciate someones thoughts on this.

I'm not in a deep state of suffering. I was a while back, which lead me down the spiritual path where I discovered myself. It's more the balance between the dual and the nondual that is hard to achieve I believe. I don't feel guilty, more just annoyed by the strength of the thought "why change anything, when the one who wants to change is idea of me and not really me." Which is kinda contradictory, as the voice who says this is the idea of me. Haha, fucking thought loops, there's no end to the creativity of the ego mind.

This is great advice. Dropping all of the concepts of these things are easier said than done though. But I notice that the concepts are definitely prevalent in my though patterns, and are the main cause of the suffering I experience.

I don't know if I would say that I want to manage the ego. That may be the reason for my confusion though. I think my confusion also comes from the overload of spiritual "knowledge" that I've recieved over the past years. I think my ego uses spiritual videos and books to remain unconscious, and then uses all of the concepts to create a maze inside my head. I'm well aware of what is happening, but the question still seems really interesting to me. How do you guys approach such things. You seem to be pretty into this spiritual stuff (excuse my language). Do you train? eat healthy? do good things for your mind and body? or has the spiritual path lead you to a state of laziness and lack of energy/motivation to do anything at all?

What are your thoughts behind this?

This post was literally just my thoughts at the moment written down. I just wanted to hear if anyone else have had the same kind of problem, post awakening. And how they dealt with it. I'm just irritated by my lack of drive. The drive I had some years ago, is almost gone. Or maybe not irritated by the lack of drive but maybe just annoyed that I set these goals that I don't live up to

Okay. So I'll refrase my question. How do you guys approach positive personal desires? Like eating healthier for example. It's interesting talking about consciousness and ego and all of that but I'm just looking for an answer from other human beings with a spiritual interest. Your still a human being in a relative sense.

That's what I'm saying, it's my ego all of it. When I let go of my mind there is no problem at all. This post is just my ego ranting. But there is a desire to resolve this, "problem." So that I can get my ass off the couch and do something for myself. It seems to be a tricky trap you can fall into, when doing all of this enlightenment shit haha.

So you don't apply spiritual teachings and guru's into your "search"? I know guru's and teachers can't provide more than words, but I find they can help point you to a place that was a blindspot before. I'm interested in hearing other people's approach to these things.

Who is your go to spiritual teacher or guru? Who do you always find yourself coming back to, because of the valuable perspectives they've given you?

How do you find motivation for bettering yourself or life situation after an abiding awakening? (if you have bad habits; unhealthy eating or bad sleep patterns etc. or having the motivation to train or work towards something)

your 4th and 5th trip is very similar to an experience I had smoking weed alone one day. First time I have smoked alone, with the intention of having a breakthrough. I experienced it as if my whole life had been lead up to this exact point, where everything I ever believed in disappeared in the matter of "seconds". I disappeared into infinite fractals (I was laying under a tree, and the branches turned into the fractals I became/was.) Funny thing is I put on a meditation by mooji just before my breakthrough, and I was hearing gods voice through him. Every time a personal thought came into this infinite space and there was a little believe, I could see the fractals going back into reality, and then back into fractals everytime I realized the non truth of the thoughts. This was going on for eternity. Thoughts I remember was thoughts like "is this really gonna go for eternity" and then an amazing insight would come and bliss me out. Suddenly I was back in my body and the 18 minute meditation was still going, I looked around and what I was met with was simply awe-inspiring. Out of nothing all of this was created. Everything is literally god playing with himself. I went home and went on youtube, and I was hearing every guru that I listened to before in totally different light. I (god) was talking through all of these people to myself, about how to navigate this "game" I have made. I was amazing myself with the reality that I created as If it was the first time I had ever heard it. A video I remember I saw at this point was this: I was talking to myself through these to guys, and the insights were amazing. A very big insight that I had was that everything does wake up when you wake up. From the standpoint of god, everything is god.