billiesimon

Thanks dude. Are they so rare that it's almost impossibile to find them? Yes, I'm working on myself and I'm willing to improve. But is it possible for a normal guy like me to find them?

My usual behaviour is listening to her problems (I used to, since I'm single now), giving her acceptance for her faults, giving advice, and helping out when she needed it. I have a general attitude of being affectionate and undestanding, I sometimes spent an entire hour listening to her feelings of being lonely or about a fight with her friends. Other behaviours of mine are being almost always ready to help her out, and I generally like to hug a lot. The part that pisses me off is the fact that they do not reciprocate my genuine effort to be undestanding and present.

Best response, thanks man!! Yes, I've noticed this stuff recently because I'm studying pickup and starting out with self actualization. I've discovered that being very attractive and charismatic is the baseline. But here's the tricky question: if you are very attractive for her, and she likes you a lot, is it ok to give her support and affection? And will she give you affection and emotional support back? Again, I mean in a relationship where she is very attracted to you and you are affectionate, not ice cold. I don't have much experience, only 2 relationships, pardon.

I get it that I also have to cultivate compassion for myself, but I don't understand what it has to do with partners being compassionate for me. If I'm dating a person I want to care for them and help them, understand their emotions and give them motivation to be happy in life. Independently from their own level of self compassion. It's not that i EXPECT it from them... but I think that it should be pretty normal to receive compassion and understanding from a partner, especially if youre supportive with them. I don't understand why should they remain indifferent towards me.

What can't you understand? I already give compassion and support. Isn't it normal to get it back if you're a good partner? Why are you excusing leeching behaviour? A relationship is made of reciprocal sinergy, not a one way slave-master condition.

Being in a couple today is very different from just 20 years ago. Is it safe to have a relationship nowadays with this trend for tinder? Almost ALL girls have tinder these days, and how are you supposed to trust a girlfriend if she can use the app at ANY time? She can get pumped every week from a different football muscleman without leaving any suspect for you. What's motivating her to be loyal? She gains nothing from being respectful with all this technology. What do you think?

Thanks for the deep reply, man!

Leo, I want to say that I completely disagree with markussweden, and I find his responses silly in every topic. But, isn't this policy of hate speech against freedom of speech and pro censorship?

I completely disagree with you. Where do you see that women love manliness? It's science fiction. Women constantly try to effeminize men, and to control them. They don't like masculinity and you are confusing a momentary sexual attraction that they feel for a constant love. Women usually are attracted to masculinity in the bedroom, but they hate it outside of the sex dimension. I think it's pretty clear, and you're clearly blinded for not seeing it, the evidence is out there.

This message is either a troll or pure nonsense. FIrst you encourage a masculine movement, and then feminism. It's complete incongruency. Feminism wants men to be feminine. I agree with you that conservatism is wrong, but the same is social justice.

Hi guys, I have had this emotional addiction since my teenage years. I've always had some friends, but zero gfs up until 23 years old, where I had the first one (I'm 28 now). But even with my friend I always had this sense of being the last one, the odd one, the expendable one, the optional. One of my high school friends, a very close one, used to mock me every single time, calling me the "last one in the group" and always treating me as second class friend. I kept this friendship for all high school years and it completely depleted my self esteem and built a very toxic and victim ego, where I've always felt like the misunderstood one, the unknown martyr, the GOOD GUY who goes punished for being innocent. That's my basic ego that I discovered with my first emotional inquiries with leo. My egoic personality is the good, nice, gentle guy, who gets victimized and misunderstood. Because I internalized this teenage period as part of my identity. I tend to be addicted to this victim energy in relationships too, where I felt as a victim of my gfs. And the dynamic was ALWAYS: I am the good one, the open hearted one, and she is the opportunistic shady girlfriend. Now I've just left my social circle because I feel no more connected to them (they're not into self help, and are always talking badly about people, so I left them to find new people). And in this social circle recently I felt A LOT like the last one, the leftover. Which is partially true because I feel no more part of their mindset. so i left. By the way, if it happens to me to be left out of a party or of a social event of my friends, I really freak the fuck out and start to have a self destructive mindset like going insane. It's bad. But i also recognize that I am appreciated by some other friend who value me a lot, and i feel deep appreciation for that, and I'm starting to change my perspective. But sometimes I get this massive and self destructive feeling like I'm worth zero to people and nobody wants to connect with me. I want to heal this worthless feeling. Where should I start? Do you have video and books suggestions?

Actually it is inverting the polarities. Causing men to be feminine and women masculine. This brings chaos between the sexes. But the original manly polarity is clearly damaged. Being a masculine woman is not a contribution to the masculine polarity if men are feminine.

Thanks, I heard a lot of positive reviews about it. I'm gonna read it soon! Does it talk about these dynamics?

I've started to practice self help and pickup from this year, and I feel a lot of weight on my "soul", so to speak, about my old lifestyle. My ex gf was too idle in her life, and now I feel like it's been a nice thing that she left me. Now, I'm starting to feel "out of place" with my social circle, which is made of people just like the me of the past years: lazy, whiny, passive with girls and victim mentality regarding dating, deeply materialist and sometimes very superficial friends. I was like this for a long time, but now I start to feel very out of place with them, since I can't be understood and can't open up with them, they lead a very shallow and idle/victim kind of friendship. In a lot of pickup philosophy it is highly advised to change your friends if you have passive ones who don't resonate with you anymore. The last time I hung out with them I felt completely inauthentic, faking a lot of beahaviours just not to seem out of place, and in the end I just remained quiet and stuck in my head all night. I feel like they enjoy talking about BS and criticizing people, and they don't connect with the person they have beside them. I feel like I can't really open up anymore. By the way, I have some single friends (2 or 3) that I'm deep friends with but they are not in a circle, they are just 3 friends I see sometimes, which are actually very well connected with me. What do you guys think I should do? Should I quietly ditch the social circle and approach people to find more compatible friends?

Thanks man, I need to focus on going out and socializing. As @pluto said, my heart tells me that this is not my place anymore. It's my ego that wants me to stay in the same place for a sense of security. I need to go out and find the people I resonate with. It's not easy because I've grown very socially lazy with my ex gf, but I have to endure it.

Hi guys, I'm still somehow recovering from my breakup but I'm almost ready to start over again and socialize with new people! I have this question, bugging my mind for several days. Can you be vulnerable with women? can you express your fears and doubts about life? Girl go CONSTANTLY to their bfs to find emotional stability and empathy, and generally guys tend to give them this empathy and their interest never goes down because of this. But are we sure it's the same with girls? I tend to see that girls don't really want their bfs to be emotional and open about their vulnerability. They say it all the time "i want an emotional guy" but... girls really dislike a guy who's emotional. that's also where the stereotype of the asshole comes from. An asshole is able to be emotionally cold to his woman and she loves him for that, because he NEVER shows weakness to her, never seeks her out for comfort or for empathy. She never has the BURDEN of helping him out with his emotions and doubts about life. I believe this is the harsh truth about women that PC culture constantly hides from us. Men are usually very happy about helping their women. But is the opposite true? Share your thoughts. EDIT: I'm NOT saying that girls like assholes because of the indifference towards her. I'm just saying that she likes the ABSENCE of caring for him.

Ok, but if you're JUST altruist and let everyone rob you, trick you, and beat you, will end up miserable. I'm not suggesting to be an asshole. What is exactly the attitude that you're leading in these recent years? I'm interested.

Most of the people are very very low consciousness and tend to manipulate and shame the others. This is not the best world to live in, for now. I hope you will find inner peace and valuable people:)

I'm here to work on myself of course. Can you explain in detail what's happening inside me?

I'm not angry at you, I appreciate the replies. Yes, I've experienced unfairness in my life, poorly justified by female victim mentality. That's why I tend to overreact, but my intentions are good, I just want peaceful relationships between the sexes, without shaming eachother.

That's great advice, I have to work on my self esteem and self trust. But why should I be loyal to her if she is not loyal to me? isn't this an easy way to be walked over? Isn't self respect meant to be respecting your word and purpose and at the same time not being abused by others?

I don't use tinder, never used it. Look at the statistics and all the scientific data about dating and mating in human societies. Women mate with the top men, which is why in all human history a lot of men died without children. A woman who goes on tinder finds IMMEDIATELY someone to fuck. Men don't. I know some women fear that their men could go to tinder and have sex, but the reality is that it's unlikely to succeed. Women on the other hand succeed because of the mating strategy of finding the best "players". I don't like slut shaming, I NEVER said I was pro shaming. In fact I hate every form of shaming. You're justifying male shaming only because some societies still have slut shaming? It doesn't make sense! Shaming is always wrong. I don't understand this white knight mentality. Why is equality always about the woman? Why is it ok for her to fuck me over and not for me to do the same?

8 years from now we're going to pay welfare to every single woman as wage slaves lol. Can't see a bright future. Equality is so fake right now, and just a buzzword. The irony is that I actually like REAL equality, but not this authoritarian pc culture. What do you mean with big change? what research? Can you give me some info?

By the way, she's NOT my property, she can cancel the relationship AT ANY TIME. She can see whoever the fuck she wants and even not seeing me for months. But if a girls asks for a monogamous couple... shouldn't she at the very fucking least respect her word? Is this sexism too?!?

Why do you guys all assume that I want some kind of authoritarian couple?! In fact I want the opposite. I hate restrictions. And I hate negative control and negative boundaries. I'm saying a completely different thing. Maybe it's my fault for explaining badly. I'll try again. Let's follow this scenario. You meet a girl, and she likes you, and you like her. You have sex, without a relationship (which is OK) and after a few weeks of dating, SHE asks you to start a monogamous relationship (I always wait for them to ask, because game taught me that, and it works). After this, you have a monogamous relationship that SHE asked for. I'm not a controlling guy, AT ALL, and i always let them go out with female and male friednds, I even encourage that. Now, in this PEACEFUL and LOVING scenario, where you love eachother, there's still the problem of tinder and dating sites, lurking there in the dark for her. I NEVER, NEVER suggested to control her and to stalk her to keep her down. Never. I'm just ASKING. Is it safe to have a couple nowadays with all this tinder culture? Will she stay loyal? Or are you all suggesting that she should fuck everybody behind your back WHILE wanting a stable monogamous couple with you? And while you actually remain loyal like a fucking beaten dog? Is this fair for you guys? To be a cuckold while you act like an actual respectful man? I'm just asking, because the double standard is real. Also I don't understand why women empowerment is fucking you over, while if you fuck her over you're a sexist pig. Consistency anyone?