Preety_India

Emotions part 4

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Visualizations. 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

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Update January 21, 2022. 2.30pm. 

I just woke up from a nightmare and in the dream I could see buildings burning. 

People were running like crazy. It felt like the End times. 

I want to do death visualizations now. 

 

 

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Important statements

Emotions part 1

Emotions part 2

Emotions part 3

Emotions part 4

 

Edited by Preety_India

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Update January 21, 2022. 3.30pm. 

I want to feel calm. 

I want to feel nothingness. 

I want to visualize death. 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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6 hours ago, Preety_India said:

Also keep a track on the outcome of things. 

And see what aligns and what doesn't align. Alignment is key. 

Does this align with who I am and what I want? 

Are you doing things that are more in alignment with what you want or are you spending your time doing things that your life is not aligned with? 

  • Nature of Emotions 
  • Track and management of time
  • Nature of actions 
  • Measure the nature of outcome
  • Seek alignment 
 

 

I really think the quickest way to raise yourself out of whatever pit you're in is to just align yourself with whatever you think is the most important thing to do and give yourself to it and surrender the resistance from a self that would rather masterbathe smoke weed and play the Sims. If you only wait around for a spark of inspiration while needlessly suffering a meaningless life you aren't on the right page, I don't think you can find your purpose through thought, it just comes to you.

 

If you are deeply suffering you are not seeking purpose but relief, and when time comes to do the right thing or attach to relief you will attach to relief, so just take care of yourself first before you go doing anything. Get financially independant and fulfill your emotional needs. It will strangle you if you don't.

 

The possibility to be entangeled by your emotional needs and egoic triggers like ambition will completely cloud your clarity to your purpose. But I guess I would just ask myself the question: What is wrong with world? And work from that point onwards. 

 

Those are just my thoughts from where I was at a year ago and now trying to find purpose and understanding, entering my dark night and feeling alive again. I just made a yt vid bout that if you wanna check it out.

https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/76820-a-purpose-cannot-be-found/

 

https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/76820-a-purpose-cannot-be-found/

 

 

 

Quote

Important statements

Emotions part 1

Emotions part 2

Emotions part 3

Emotions part 4

 

 

 

 

 

Nature of Emotions 

Track and management of time

Nature of actions 

Measure the nature of outcome

Seek alignment 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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8 hours ago, Preety_India said:

Yep this gif kinda motivates me to work hard.. 

620gbi.gif

 

61zfzj.jpg

 

Work hard baby. Work hard. Work harder. C'mon motivate that lazy ass. 

 


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4 hours ago, Preety_India said:

Today is January 21 and a brand new day. Today I should be careful and not waste any time.. 

Plan the day carefully although I woke up late as usual. 

January 21 2022. 

Today I'll groom a bit, do some meditation, do some steaming and sit in the garden, maybe try some yoga for the first time. 

Drink a tiny amount of tea. Because I can't take too much 

Do my witchcraft practice 

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Important statements

 

At least you aren't wasting your time in non aligning things. 

 


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Cheerio Y'all to myself /Hello Preety babygirl. 

 

623ywg.jpg


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

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Hello everyone, I need some advice. My younger brother (21) seems to have become a very unhappy and easily irritable person who does not want to acknowledge that there are problems (in his life or (as a result) in the lives of others, i.e. my family), take advice, or even desire to change anything. He seems very tense and frustrated. As soon as you approach him about even the tiniest problem he becomes extremely defensive. In fact, when you approach him for anything else, even if you want to do something good for him, too. He immediately reacts passiv-aggresively and defensively (hope you know what I mean).

This has been going on for years, since he was a teenager, and it has become worse and worse over the years. We have no idea what to do with him anymore and my parents (he lives with them) have basically given up on changing anything, and it really hurts and frustrates them to see him like this.

Me too to be honest, but I find myself at my wits end and unable to help him anymore, especially since he doesn't seem to really want or accept any help. I am very worried about him and I fear that he is already depressed (he sleeps a lot and doesn't seem to find much joy in anything except playing the guitar) or that he could suppress his emotions even more deeply and violently. 

He has a job as a shop assistant (or whatever the english term is for selling stuff in a small store) which he hates because he thinks all the people who come there are stupid and their questions are unnecessary. When he comes home he's always so miserable and irritated... He's studying in his last semester, he says he likes the subject but hates the university (and in turn, his studies, not thematically, but structurally). 

It seems almost impossible to get through to him, except sometimes when very careful and in his better moments.
It is frustrating to watch helplessly how it keeps getting worse and worse every time when I visit my family. Since I haven't lived with them for many years, I feel even more helpless and it breaks my heart to see him feel like he is being denied love and his denying love to my parents in turn.

I don't want to come across as some sort of know-it-all who lectures him (although I'm afraid that he perceives anyone ho wants to help him as that) and wags his finger at him, I want to let him know that life can be good and that people love him, more than he knows.

Help?

 


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The answer I gave to the above query. 

 

I see a ton of similarities between my behavior in general and your brother's behavior. 

And I somewhat gave you similar reactions as your brother did. 

He is showing some rebellious signs that i used to show. 

This could be due to many factors. 

Does he generally feel lethargic? 

Does he have hidden medical issues that he doesn't open up about? For me it was that. 

I always felt like anyone who is trying to help me is trying to lecture me. 

This can be many reasons 

I was the smaller one in the family. I always felt unheard and unloved and ignored by my family. Yet my elder sibling was being considered awesome and valued. This is because of narcissistic parent dynamic and the golden child syndrome that narcissist parents cause. 

Are you the elder sibling (that's what I'm getting from your post)? 

Are you getting special treatment in your family because you know more or do more? If the answer to the question is yes then this could be a huge reason why he acts like that. 

Defensive behavior is often a sign of hidden trauma. Feeling neglected. Feeling ignored. Feeling unloved. Feeling abused. Feeling let down or abandoned. 

If it's not trauma, then it's simply his nature. He could be a bit arrogant. Or simply temperamental and moody. He could be showing early signs of bipolar disorder. They act a bit arrogant, angry, fidgety.. 

Or he could have had a bad breakup with a girlfriend. Maybe he suffered childhood bullying from other kids that's manifesting years later in adulthood. 

You will need to come up with a whole list of causes, conditions and symptoms of his behavior in great depth in order to know where things are exactly going wrong. 

The best suggestion is to directly speak to him, a heart to heart talk and tell him to open up as much as possible so he can dig deeper into his wounds, psyche etc. I know this is hard given his behavior to shirk everyone, but you have to be persistently empathetic around such people to win their confidence. 

It's like dealing with a wild street cat. If you get angry they get angry. You have to be calm and patient and not appear tyrannical, dictatorial, superior, pushy, dominating, "intellectually intimidating", "anxiety provoking," "inhibiting or controlling", lectury or "I know it better than you" attitude. It pisses off such people because they have a strong sense of ego. They are not egotistical per say, it's just that being constantly outwitted or disappointed in life can create an over sensitive defensive ego. 

On the flip side he could be showing narcissist traits. Such people act defensive as well. You can't tell them anything they don't want to hear. 

In any case. Give him space and give him time. People like that crave freedom a lot 

 

Depending on my interactions with you I found you a bit lectury and "I know better" type. This can actually appear invasive to a person who wants to be empathized with, understood and reassured rather than being pointed to or judged. 

Drop some of your own behavior that could be triggering him and make his situation worse than better.. 

Give him a comfort zone. Bond and build trust rather than blame or make him feel "wrong" or "odd". 

 

Such behaviors are often noticed in individuals who come from families who have judgemental parents or a judgmental older brother/sister who fails to bond properly but always comes around to judge

 

 


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7 hours ago, Preety_India said:

Today is January 21 and a brand new day. Today I should be careful and not waste any time.. 

Plan the day carefully although I woke up late as usual. 

January 21 2022. 

Today I'll groom a bit, do some meditation, do some steaming and sit in the garden, maybe try some yoga for the first time. 

Drink a tiny amount of tea. Because I can't take too much 

Do my witchcraft practice 

Quote

Important statements

 

 

 

Babygirl lift your finger. 

 

62486p.gif


 

Edited by Preety_India

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This was a good insight. 

I doubt you'll find your answer like this on a forum. Each situation is unique, and each moment is different. All one can do I would say is to cultivate the wisdom and awareness much higher so that when the next situation comes you will know what to do from within spontanuously out that state of higher intelligence that knows what is the appropriate thing to do without thinking. That would be my 2cents.

 


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This is helpful 

https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/76960-simple-trick-to-improve-productivity-and-focus/

 

Work standing up! 

Give it a shot. For years I worked sitting down and was always tired, but I find when I work standing up I'm able to focus and be productive, so much that my thoughts even flow smoother. 

This may be a great strategy for kinesthetic learners. Stand up, get the blood flowing!

 

.. 

Yup I did this same technique today. 

I stood up and did my work and I saw that I felt a bit more motivated than usual 

Another technique I use is to talk to myself. I know it sounds absurd.. 

But whenever I talk to myself I feel more energetic and connected and in a flow. Like I'm getting stuff done without losing focus 

So Yea try talking to yourself. 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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I'm going to use the Seed => plant => fruit model. 

Put the motivating seed to get the result. 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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What are the ways in which I can motivate myself? 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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Update 1, January 22,2022. 1.25 am 

Woke up feeling tired. Took my pill. 

I had to take the pill at 10 pm after food. Missed on it. 

Anyway I need to built up better habits. I feel good that I at least slept. 

My diarrhoea was in control. 

I'm feeling some pain in my right ear but that's okay. 

 


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Update 2 , January 22,2022. 1.25 am 

I'm trying to uplift myself. 

626bi1.gif

 

626bch.gif

 

 

 

62486p.gif

 

  62690d.gif

 

 

626bpk.gif

 

 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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Update 3, January 22,2022. 2 am 

 

Just soaking in the goodness of the moment. 

626fna.gif

 

626gpl.gif

 

 

626i95.gif

 

 

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,

626kzo.gif

 

Edited by Preety_India

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Update 4, January 22,2022. 6 am 

 

How is Babygirl Preety feeling right now? 

 

I'm feeling good. I can't see any light outside. Feels like everything is dark. 

I want to walk through this. 

627dfm.gif

 

 

 

627emu.gif

 

 

 

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627f7s.gif

 

 

627iqp.gif

 


 

 

627nuu.jpg

 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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I was exploring my own name and I stumbled upon this. 

 

And then I saw this. Lmao. xD

 

627p05.jpg

 

 

Then I saw a cake with my name on it. 

 

627otn.jpg

 

 

627oye.jpg

 

 

627ow0.jpg

 

Edited by Preety_India

INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

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