Weird meditation feeling, any explanation/advice?

[Naol]

Hi, had a weird feeling during two of my meditions, but I am pretty sure that it is common and that you guys will be able to help me to understand what is going on. (Sorry if my english is not perfect, I am French). 

First of, a few background info: I have been meditating regularly for maybe 9 months now, 20 or 30 min a day, rarely one hour (mindfulness), which is not that much, but enough to be able to notice some subtle changes in my level of awareness and concentration. Also, I did a Vipassana retreat 2 years ago. 

Then comes the weird feeling as I was doing a solo retreat, on the 8th day of doing 5-6 hours of meditation a day + 2-3 hours of contemplation.

I was doing a simple vipassana meditation focusing on the feeling under my nose and then after maybe 20 min I felt like I should focus on the fact of being conscious. Suddenly I felt something like a shift of conciouness I guess.  Here a description of the feeling:

Had an intense feeling of concentration and then I felt that I was very conscious that I was conscious. This feeling was pretty stable. 

I was able to question/explore this state of conciousness at the same time of having it, without loosing it. 

Had a feeling/sensation of expansion, especially around my head and my upper body

Had an intense but not painful feeling of pressure on the top of the head (prefrontal cortex area), and in the nose, going even towards my neck. 

Was aware of my body but everything happened more around my head. Did not feel like during Vipassana classic meditation when you are scaning your body again and again and having this feeling of pins and needles, being very aware of your body. Plus, I was less aware of my lower body than my upper body. 

Didn't have a deep feeling of joy, or peace (joy the first time because it was new but then not that much). It was just kind of nice. 

 

I did my best to describe it! I tried different things having this experience, like trying to be more and more conscious of consciousness, to focus more on my body, on my hands, to extend this feeling… Did not have that much results. I did try to keep going and going but at one point, I was just super bored and I stopped. 

 

I feel like I am stuck in this stade of consciouness where I don't have that much to do, and I do not know where to go. 

Any explanation/advice? It would be helpfull! 

Thanks

[peanutspathtotruth]

22 minutes ago, Naol said:

Did not have that much results. I did try to keep going and going but at one point, I was just super bored and I stopped. 

 

22 minutes ago, Naol said:

I feel like I am stuck in this stade of consciouness where I don't have that much to do, and I do not know where to go. 

What kind of result are you expecting? Meditation is not aimed at a specific state we want to go to, it is more like an open ended exploration, a complete letting go of wanting anything out of your experience.

From your description, you're on the right path. You used techniques to become more conscious, then you could drop the techniques and just stay in your being. There literally is NOTHING TO DO. 

The simplest and most direct guidance would be this: Stay in the silence/awareness. Just stay there, don't add or subtract anything, don't meddle with anything, just allow yourself to be. Since I know that this can be confusing, I highly (!) recommend you check out these two books, these are my personal favorites when it comes to meditation:
- True Meditation by Adyashanti
- The Unfolding Now by AH Almaas

Also, if you feel a natural curiosity emerge, then there is so to speak "something to do" - you can inquire into your nature. But be aware that this is only temporarily a movement, and in the end even inquiry is a cessation of manipulating anything in your experience. Adyashanti goes into the meditation/inquiry dynamic in the aforementioned book. Also, check out Rupert Spira for that.

In the end, all meditation or inquiry culminates in silent being. So don't worry, you're not doing anything wrong 

Edited September 14, 2021 by peanutspathtotruth

[Naol]

ok thank you so much for your answer! Indeed I am looking to move up on the path of enlightenment, and even if I am not crazy about that I am trying to know if I am getting there or if I stagnate. But it seems right to go deep into this silence and inquire. 

Thank you very much for your books recommendations and advices  <3