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Preety_India

Self torture

4 posts in this topic

When I went through this phase.

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

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3 hours ago, Preety_India said:

If you love someone unconditionally you'll stop surviving.

I loved someone unconditionally, i ended up torturing myself.

 

 

3 hours ago, Preety_India said:

 

Unconditional love is not a healthy form of love. It's like self immolation. 

When you exhibit unconditional love for someone, it's not about being a doormat. 

Unconditional love shown to another makes you own their suffering. You begin to feel what they feel. 

Unconditional love gives rise to deep Emphathy where you begin to absorbs someone's pain.

The suffering is great and enormous. Greater is the love, greater is the pain.

Imagine a mother who loves her child unconditionally. Now if she loses this child, her suffering is pure torture. 

There cannot be unconditional love without suffering.

I've been through suicides, near death experiences, unconditional love and the entire gamut.

I'll describe unconditional love as follows-

It's like taking a psychedelic drug. Initially it doesn't do anything. Then you feel happy because you're losing yourself..you're losing more and more till you become one with the world and there's no part of your identity left. You feel ecstatic, as though you became one with the world. You can feel the world so close. After some time you feel like you're going through. You have now owned the pain of the world psychically. You take in the pain of the whole world. You feel like you're going through the worst hell.. 

In loving unconditionally, you end up sacrificing a lot because sacrifice is the Nature of true love, because of this sacrifice, you tend to end up hurting yourself abundantly.

Unconditional love is extreme suffering.

 

 

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

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When I felt unconditional love, it was extreme suffering.

Love itself is suffering..

Love is the highest form of suffering.

 

It's like the suffering of Christ 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

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Suffering is the (seeming) absence of (that is: unrecognized) Love. Suffering is resistance and exclusion, Love is acceptance and inclusion. 

Love is not suffering, but suffering is Love. 

Unconditional Love goes full circle into forgetting that it is Love - it is so utterly selfless (loving), that it even abandons its selflessness and "pretends" to be a self which results in suffering, because "self" and "resistance" are identical. That is why suffering is Love. 

Yea I meant something similar..

That it results in suffering. Because it directly challenges survival.

It's difficult to sustain it since it contradicts survival and breeds suffering to the Self that is desperately trying to survive.

And it is hard to transcend survival, so this whole process of letting go and allowing the experience of Unconditional love goes against the very nature of Selfish Survival and so the whole process is extremely painful and it breeds a lot of suffering in the process.

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

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