Negative self image

[Thunder Kiss]

I’m working on my negative self image, it’s so difficult.  Currently I’m feeling apathy. Other feelings like: unworthiness, comparing myself to others, pointlessness, feeling ugly, not understanding how someone could like/love me. Feeling fearful of the future. Afraid of getting older. All of this makes me want to isolate and hide away from the world.  
I just want to be free of this but it’s just a part of who I am and don’t know if it can ever stop.  
I have grown a lot; but seems the more I grow the more depressed I become. I don’t feel enjoyment with anything..Feels like there is no point.  It’s constant battle between trying to be happy and not be moody and miserable. I feel melancholic. Feel Apathetic about life but at the same time I feel so deeply and sad.  Caring too much. 
i just want to be fun loving and carefree.  Those days are gone.