I hate thinking about nostalgia because it always overwhelms me

[fopylo]

I wouldn't call it such a "serious" problem, but it is very painful and I've gotten used to suppress it over and over so now I just never think about it really.
Almost every time I hear soundtracks of video games/anime that I used to enjoy I get overwhelmed and I hate this feeling. I mean, I used to actually quite enjoy it and bask in it, but I've learned that after a while it actually makes me feel quite depressed, and also I'm scared that some family member or someone will watch me in this state of overwhelm so I play stoic and suppress.
I think I'm a very sensitive person when it comes to nostalgia and feelings. Music hits me in such a deep way (almost profound) and it brings a shit ton of thoughts and feelings which I feel don't serve me any purpose other than taking me back to the past. I need to focus on the present but I just keep getting those doses.
A big reason why I feel overwhelmed is because I had a dream to create music covers of video game/anime music (inspired by other youtubers) and simply create my own music (and maybe also video game someday), but my neurosis disabled me from doing anything, and so each time I hear beautiful tunes from something I enjoyed then it reminds me quickly of my neurosis and I suppress it, basically

Honestly, I don't know what was really my question but it would be cool to hear what you say about it.

By the way, it tends to happen a lot when I'm getting into a period of high - I mean like starting to get back into practicing the piano, back into enjoying life, back into meeting old friends, summer is coming, end of school (and all the people whom I've been with for 12 years), starting soon a new phase in my life. Things are growing and changing and I feel like I've improved a lot since following Actualized.org.