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Preety_India

Communication and connection

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I've realized through my spiritual journeys and quests that the final answer lies in the word communication

 

It's all about communication. 

Everything is either direct communication or a form of communication. 

If you got a bit deeper with communication, what is the word that comes to your mind? 

What exactly do you build with communication? 

Connection.................. Yesssssssss

Now I got it. 

Spirituality is all about a genuine connection.. 

And I'm walking along that line. I'm reaching there. I'm a few steps short of a great discovery. 

I knew I was close to the finishing line. 

My hard work of 3 long years would not go in vain. 

Plus I had been thinking about spirituality since childhood. 

I knew it would culminate into some form of preserving maturity that remains surprisingly calm and stable and continues along its path. 

 


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Omg I can't believe this is happening. 

Right at the pinnacle of my spiritual evolution I come across this video of Miley Cyrus. 

I had been imagining myself as a girl maturing and blossoming into someone with a cowboy hat and boots and not giving a fuck about what the world thinks and simply focused on my own spiritual growth. 

And here it is, just in time, comes in this interview where I see Miley Cyrus personifying what I had been imagining. Not only the outer aesthetics in terms of her simple shirt and boots but also her voice and mannerisms, all dribbling with maturity, I can't believe it. 

 I'm seeing my alter ego right in front of my eyes, my spiritually evolved alter ego. 

I can imagine myself in an underground rugged basement studio with a mic stand and me screaming a song at the top of my lungs and dancing around in jeans and boots and not thinking about the world even for a second. Just soaking up who I am and wanting to connect with God in the most genuine way possible. 

Omg. 

 

 

This is great. Covid was so hard on me. 

 

 

 

 


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Omg I'm crying so bad right now. 

She is saying exactly what I wanted to say.

Covid caused so much anxiety. 

And then she says everything that I wanted to say, ditto. 

Just 5 seconds in, she says "you wanna have a real conversation" 

"and with that timing is everything. I learned that whether it's love, relationships or just comedy, to make people laugh, to make cry, there is a timing to all of it and when you lose that timing and that connection, and that awareness that okay I'm sensing what you are feeling, and you're sensing what I'm feeling, when you lose that, I think that's whats been causing some of this anxiety, the fear, because there is an unknowingness of the response, you lose that when you are talking to a screen. "

And I remember a few weeks ago I wrote in one of my journals that if I have to adopt a certain look it would consist of dark painted long nails, lots of rings or specific finger rings, and a sweater or a shrug. Just the winter look. And now look at Miley Cyrus's hands. Oh my Goodness. She is rocking the dark painted nails in jet black with loads of rings. 

If this is not a sign then I don't know what is. 

 

 

 

 

 


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March 2, 2021. 

God showed me this video at the right opportunity. This is it. This is the Ultimate Spiritual. 

Omg Miley Cyrus is really growing and growing super fast. I need to really follow her growth. 

Queen Sass. 

She has come a long way since Hannah Montana. Omg she was my favorite with Hannah Montana but I wasn't upset with her changing. 

I love her authenticity and integrity. That's absolutely, hands down the most important thing on the path of  spirituality. 

 


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In the past week I came across Paris Hilton and now Miley Cyrus. 

I can't believe it. It's like one after another. Yesss. These are young women of our generation. And I always thought I couldn't relate to them because they are too rich for me to even think about them. 

But loooooook. They say things that are so relevant. 

Paris talked about PTSD 5 months ago and I was diagnosed with PTSD just 10 days ago. I could relate to every fucking thing she said. 

This is such a synchronicity. I can't believe this. The universe is just getting closer and closer and more synchronous clues are popping up. 

And now Miley Cyrus. 

All her insights have been living up in my head since past few weeks. 

This is truly amazing. I'm closing in on the root of my fears and issues. Yay finally. 

 


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I came from such poverty and I came so far. 

I always wanted to grow grow grow. 

 

I worked so hard, even to the point of death, to come to a point where I could make sense of everything. 

It was my determination. 

I think it's really paying off now royally. 

 


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Through a higher sense of self awareness.. 

Miley Cyrus is giving a lot of tips on what exercises to help spiritual growth. 

I'm going to make notes. 

So Zane asks her what she thinks about whatever her parents taught her as a child.  How does she look back on it. Has she always been this way? 

 

Transcript

00:01

[Music]

00:12

this place is cool

00:13

thank you so much i am at some point i'm

00:16

gonna

00:17

this wall is gonna go away and i'm gonna

00:19

make a big like songwriting deck out

00:20

there because i'd like to go outside we

00:21

have a little mini spot out there

00:23

but my mom came in here and spruced the

00:26

place up

00:27

and she's obsessed with putting like

00:28

photos of me with all these

00:30

people everywhere so this is like a

00:31

mother's doing i love how you came

00:33

straight in and you like and you

00:34

zeroed in on the thing that i would have

00:36

gone to and you've justified it without

00:37

me even raising it it's my [ __ ]

00:39

mother

00:40

came here today i'm like yo why because

00:41

my mom

00:43

she just is like you know she wants me

00:44

to be proud of my moments but it's just

00:46

very

00:46

like it's cute in her house but in my

00:48

house i feel like it's kind of like a

00:50

like a whole dentist you know when you

00:52

go and you're like i don't really care

00:53

whose teeth you clean like you go to

00:55

that dentist as well yeah can you clean

00:56

teeth or not

00:57

i don't care about the pictures on the

00:58

wall it's so lay how you doing

01:00

i'm doing really good i'm happy to be

01:02

talking to you you too

01:03

i was thinking it's nice actually out of

01:05

all the times you know

01:07

covid has just been just so hard on

01:10

everybody whether it's

01:12

actually physically getting the illness

01:14

or

01:15

just mentally and spiritually or you

01:18

know so many people are just

01:19

experiencing anxiety and fear but

01:22

the one great thing is you know to bring

01:25

you to

01:26

my studio bring you to my home yeah

01:28

we've never been able to sit where i was

01:30

thrilled

01:31

the music really gets i mean when it

01:32

came into my diary and it's i was like

01:33

where are we doing it

01:34

and they're like well it's it's at

01:36

miley's place i was thrilled because

01:37

you're right it started out in our place

01:39

and then it was covert orientated tech

01:41

talk

01:41

yeah i don't like that especially with

01:43

you and me you know you want to have a

01:44

real conversation and

01:46

i think with that i think timing is

01:49

everything

01:50

you know i learned that whether that was

01:52

in love or

01:54

relationships or just comedy i mean just

01:57

even to

01:58

to make people laugh to make people cry

02:00

there's a timing to all of it

02:01

and when you lose that timing and that

02:03

connection and that awareness of okay

02:06

i'm sensing what you're feeling you're

02:07

 

 


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Through a higher sense of self awareness.. 

Miley Cyrus is giving a lot of tips on what exercises to help spiritual growth. 

I'm going to make notes. 

So Zane asks her what she thinks about whatever her parents taught her as a child.  How does she look back on it. Has she always been this way? 

 

Transcript

00:01

[Music]

00:12

this place is cool

00:13

thank you so much i am at some point i'm

00:16

gonna

00:17

this wall is gonna go away and i'm gonna

00:19

make a big like songwriting deck out

00:20

there because i'd like to go outside we

00:21

have a little mini spot out there

00:23

but my mom came in here and spruced the

00:26

place up

00:27

and she's obsessed with putting like

00:28

photos of me with all these

00:30

people everywhere so this is like a

00:31

mother's doing i love how you came

00:33

straight in and you like and you

00:34

zeroed in on the thing that i would have

00:36

gone to and you've justified it without

00:37

me even raising it it's my [ __ ]

00:39

mother

00:40

came here today i'm like yo why because

00:41

my mom

00:43

she just is like you know she wants me

00:44

to be proud of my moments but it's just

00:46

very

00:46

like it's cute in her house but in my

00:48

house i feel like it's kind of like a

00:50

like a whole dentist you know when you

00:52

go and you're like i don't really care

00:53

whose teeth you clean like you go to

00:55

that dentist as well yeah can you clean

00:56

teeth or not

00:57

i don't care about the pictures on the

00:58

wall it's so lay how you doing

01:00

i'm doing really good i'm happy to be

01:02

talking to you you too

01:03

i was thinking it's nice actually out of

01:05

all the times you know

01:07

covid has just been just so hard on

01:10

everybody whether it's

01:12

actually physically getting the illness

01:14

or

01:15

just mentally and spiritually or you

01:18

know so many people are just

01:19

experiencing anxiety and fear but

01:22

the one great thing is you know to bring

01:25

you to

01:26

my studio bring you to my home yeah

01:28

we've never been able to sit where i was

01:30

thrilled

01:31

the music really gets i mean when it

01:32

came into my diary and it's i was like

01:33

where are we doing it

01:34

and they're like well it's it's at

01:36

miley's place i was thrilled because

01:37

you're right it started out in our place

01:39

and then it was covert orientated tech

01:41

talk

01:41

yeah i don't like that especially with

01:43

you and me you know you want to have a

01:44

real conversation and

01:46

i think with that i think timing is

01:49

everything

01:50

you know i learned that whether that was

01:52

in love or

01:54

relationships or just comedy i mean just

01:57

even to

01:58

to make people laugh to make people cry

02:00

there's a timing to all of it

02:01

and when you lose that timing and that

02:03

connection and that awareness of okay

02:06

i'm sensing what you're feeling you're

02:07

Transcript

00:01

[Music]

00:12

this place is cool

00:13

thank you so much i am at some point i'm

00:16

gonna

00:17

this wall is gonna go away and i'm gonna

00:19

make a big like songwriting deck out

00:20

there because i'd like to go outside we

00:21

have a little mini spot out there

00:23

but my mom came in here and spruced the

00:26

place up

00:27

and she's obsessed with putting like

00:28

photos of me with all these

00:30

people everywhere so this is like a

00:31

mother's doing i love how you came

00:33

straight in and you like and you

00:34

zeroed in on the thing that i would have

00:36

gone to and you've justified it without

00:37

me even raising it it's my [ __ ]

00:39

mother

00:40

came here today i'm like yo why because

00:41

my mom

00:43

she just is like you know she wants me

00:44

to be proud of my moments but it's just

00:46

very

00:46

like it's cute in her house but in my

00:48

house i feel like it's kind of like a

00:50

like a whole dentist you know when you

00:52

go and you're like i don't really care

00:53

whose teeth you clean like you go to

00:55

that dentist as well yeah can you clean

00:56

teeth or not

00:57

i don't care about the pictures on the

00:58

wall it's so lay how you doing

01:00

i'm doing really good i'm happy to be

01:02

talking to you you too

01:03

i was thinking it's nice actually out of

01:05

all the times you know

01:07

covid has just been just so hard on

01:10

everybody whether it's

01:12

actually physically getting the illness

01:14

or

01:15

just mentally and spiritually or you

01:18

know so many people are just

01:19

experiencing anxiety and fear but

01:22

the one great thing is you know to bring

01:25

you to

01:26

my studio bring you to my home yeah

01:28

we've never been able to sit where i was

01:30

thrilled

01:31

the music really gets i mean when it

01:32

came into my diary and it's i was like

01:33

where are we doing it

01:34

and they're like well it's it's at

01:36

miley's place i was thrilled because

01:37

you're right it started out in our place

01:39

and then it was covert orientated tech

01:41

talk

01:41

yeah i don't like that especially with

01:43

you and me you know you want to have a

01:44

real conversation and

01:46

i think with that i think timing is

01:49

everything

01:50

 

 


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life or you're removed from it because

21:09

your senses aren't really so attached to

those memories anymore

and so i always hated making physical

records i'm so happy that we've moved

into

a new way of putting out music

especially if you say goodbye to

 

especially if you say goodbye to

yourself every night

and that's what i'm saying by the time

21:22

look dude this is daily that i that i

change you know and i actually really

don't like when people

you know say that it's being fickle or

you don't get to just decide you know

actually me and why

 

Edited by Preety_India

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come out because it's just

78:45

i it's the most proud i could be of

78:47

anything and you know again

78:49

i just feel like just so much gratitude

78:52

towards the collaborators who helped me

78:53

create it

78:54

you know here's the thing you'll make

78:55

another one yeah and another one

78:57

i already am i already am this song was

79:00

this

79:01

album was 12 songs long somehow i think

79:03

it's 15 right now

79:04

it's i've added three songs since it

79:06

came out twelve plus two covers

79:08

twelve two covers and now midnight's

79:09

guys stevie nicks

79:11

so now when i printed this record two

79:14

weeks ago

79:15

it was a twelve song album it's 15. so

79:18

that's the great thing about digital

79:19

you're already making another one i can

79:20

just keep adding i love it

English (auto-generated)

#MileyCyrus #PlasticHearts #ZaneLowe

Miley Cyrus - Apple Music ‘Plastic Hearts’ Interview

790,722 views

•Nov 24, 2020

35K325SHARESAVE

Miley Cyrus

15.1M subscribers

SUBSCRIBE

Miley Cyrus sits down with Apple Music’s Zane Lowe in her home studio to talk about her seventh album, ‘Plastic Hearts.’ Miley shares the major themes throughout this record and the life ex

 

Edited by Preety_India

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3:32 / 1:19:24

Transcript

00:01

[Music]

00:12

this place is cool

00:13

thank you so much i am at some point i'm

00:16

gonna

00:17

this wall is gonna go away and i'm gonna

00:19

make a big like songwriting deck out

00:20

there because i'd like to go outside we

00:21

have a little mini spot out there

00:23

but my mom came in here and spruced the

00:26

place up

00:27

and she's obsessed with putting like

00:28

photos of me with all these

00:30

people everywhere so this is like a

00:31

mother's doing i love how you came

00:33

straight in and you like and you

00:34

zeroed in on the thing that i would have

00:36

gone to and you've justified it without

00:37

me even raising it it's my [ __ ]

00:39

mother

00:40

came here today i'm like yo why because

00:41

my mom

00:43

she just is like you know she wants me

00:44

to be proud of my moments but it's just

00:46

very

00:46

like it's cute in her house but in my

00:48

house i feel like it's kind of like a

00:50

like a whole dentist you know when you

00:52

go and you're like i don't really care

00:53

whose teeth you clean like you go to

00:55

that dentist as well yeah can you clean

00:56

teeth or not

00:57

i don't care about the pictures on the

00:58

wall it's so lay how you doing

01:00

i'm doing really good i'm happy to be

01:02

talking to you you too

01:03

i was thinking it's nice actually out of

01:05

all the times you know

01:07

covid has just been just so hard on

01:10

everybody whether it's

01:12

actually physically getting the illness

01:14

or

01:15

just mentally and spiritually or you

01:18

know so many people are just

01:19

experiencing anxiety and fear but

01:22

the one great thing is you know to bring

01:25

you to

01:26

my studio bring you to my home yeah

01:28

we've never been able to sit where i was

01:30

thrilled

01:31

the music really gets i mean when it

01:32

came into my diary and it's i was like

01:33

where are we doing it

01:34

and they're like well it's it's at

01:36

miley's place i was thrilled because

01:37

you're right it started out in our place

01:39

and then it was covert orientated tech

01:41

talk

01:41

yeah i don't like that especially with

01:43

you and me you know you want to have a

01:44

real conversation and

01:46

i think with that i think timing is

01:49

everything

01:50

you know i learned that whether that was

01:52

in love or

01:54

relationships or just comedy i mean just

01:57

even to

01:58

to make people laugh to make people cry

02:00

there's a timing to all of it

02:01

and when you lose that timing and that

02:03

connection and that awareness of okay

02:06

i'm sensing what you're feeling you're

02:07

sensing what i'm feeling

02:09

when you lose that i think that's what's

02:11

kind of been causing some of this

02:12

anxiety and fear because there's an

02:14

unknowingness of the response

02:17

you lose that when you're talking

02:19

through a screen well the core of

02:20

anxiety and fears

02:21

is a desire for control and we put that

02:24

in the same conversation as time

02:26

yeah and that's why when things happen

02:27

to you it's like oh i have the worst

02:28

timing

02:29

yeah i can't believe this time that

02:30

happened yeah and it's interesting that

02:32

you would look at it from a different

02:33

perspective of like

02:34

actually i lean into the concept of time

02:36

even if at the time

02:37

it felt like a bad time also i think

02:39

there's something about

02:40

you kind of fall into the right timing

02:43

and i think there's been times where

02:45

i've wanted to rush in times where i

02:47

wanted to wait

02:48

and there's just seasons and that's been

02:51

this record for me because

02:53

this record i really was patient with

02:56

and patience you could probably get a

02:58

lot of adjectives of the things that i

03:00

am

03:00

but patient i don't think if you ask

03:02

anyone around me would necessarily be

03:04

you were sort of pushed in that

03:05

direction right because

03:07

it's so funny i was thinking back to the

03:09

last time we really spoke

03:10

well around the last album which was

03:11

younger now album album and it's funny

03:13

that title you know because i think

03:14

about like

03:15

you were really you were on a mission to

03:17

mature and to build a life for yourself

03:19

to stabilize yourself

03:20

and you called that album younger now

03:22

and it all just felt very at odds and

03:24

then 2018 the whole thing just tips

03:26

upside down as you wrote so poignantly

03:27

in your note

03:28

and i think about that that's a push

03:30

toward patience because that's about

03:32

losing control you can't control that

03:33

that must have been the problem with

03:34

looking back on it now the most

03:35

significant one of the most significant

03:37

events of your life that fire

03:38

i write down everything like i my dad

03:40

always says you know when you write it

03:41

down when you say it out loud you give

03:43

it power

03:44

you begin to create it the minute that

03:46

you write it down so i write everything

03:47

down

03:48

you know i did write about i guess it

03:50

was a push into patience but

03:51

it's now a part of my character and it's

03:54

something that i really

03:56

am proud of and it i feel it was earned

03:59

um

04:00

to be patient and as much as there's

04:03

things that

04:04

i'll miss it really what i

04:07

gained which patients being one of them

04:10

was worth it

04:11

in a sense finding a balance of feeling

04:14

detached

04:16

but still being able to connect yeah you

04:18

know yeah

04:19

i would never want someone to say you

04:21

know she just wasn't there with me she

04:23

just

04:23

you know i i do have a problem with

04:25

people that that think being protected

04:28

or guarding yourself in some way is

04:30

detachment is attachment because

04:31

if you don't protect yourself then like

04:33

take all the locks off your house

04:34

leave the keys in the car sure don't

04:36

wear shoes on your feet well also you

04:38

have a right to keep something to

04:39

yourself

04:39

i mean you or yourself before anybody

04:41

came into your life ultimately outside

04:43

you know the family that you have and

04:44

even then the minute you're born it's

04:45

your journey mm-hmm

04:46

and i wonder i've always wanted to ask

04:48

you this as you now get to a higher

04:50

state of self-awareness through your

04:51

music through your life through learning

04:53

through relationships through all of it

04:54

through maturity right it's called

04:55

maturity

04:56

do you look back now on what you were

04:59

told by your parents

05:00

what you how you acted as a kid the kind

05:02

of kid you were from that you know they

05:04

all

05:04

just had the earliest memories have you

05:06

always been this

05:07

no i mean i am not the person i was

05:10

yesterday

05:11

you know last night sitting behind you

05:14

cutting with stevie nicks on the phone

05:16

that changed me forever you know

05:17

everything changes me forever

05:19

and i'll never be

05:22

who i was yesterday in a way every night

05:26

before i go to sleep i say goodbye to

05:27

myself in a way because it's like

05:29

that person's done and there's like a

05:31

sadness to it sometimes because

05:34

i do evolve really quickly because i'm

05:37

very absorbent like i just take

05:39

everything in

05:40

yeah and recently i've had to do

05:42

inventory

05:43

of what i've owned as mine that isn't

05:46

mine because i think like you're saying

05:49

your parents so

05:50

whether it's generational or the way

05:52

that you're raised or you know

05:54

you you really do get passed through dna

05:56

yeah personality and character even fear

05:59

yeah nature versus nurture for sure you

06:01

know exactly nature versus nurture and

06:03

we're all just an equation of all those

06:05

things adding up

06:06

you know the last three years i called

06:09

it the

06:10

the cocktail of chaos because it just

06:12

felt like the worst bartender ever

06:15

which was like as the universe yeah

06:17

sometimes just kept pouring the [ __ ] and

06:19

you're like oh my god like can't drink

06:21

any more of this [ __ ] yeah and you're

06:22

just like you know

06:25

you're dizzy often that's what i mean

06:26

like when we spoke in 2017 and the album

06:28

was coming out

06:29

and you were just like i got this like i

06:32

got the relationship i got the album i

06:33

got that life i'm good

06:35

yeah and then and life just laughs it's

06:38

like

06:38

you're not done yet you know i i kind of

06:41

hate the saying but also love it that

06:43

when you make the plan

06:44

that life you know laughs at you because

06:45

i do think there's something to having

06:47

an idea of what you want and like

06:49

setting a goal and seeing it

06:51

you know i daydream a lot daydreaming

06:54

and like

06:54

seeing it all happen but not

06:58

letting it completely consume you to the

07:00

point where there's no other

07:01

opportunities you exactly and become

07:03

i never let an idea or a schedule

07:07

determine my creative choices so

07:10

listen like i made a record you and i

07:13

had talked during younger now

07:14

and then i was going and making a set of

07:16

three eps which were

07:18

amazing i was in love with the songs you

07:21

know but

07:22

those two eps weren't relevant anymore

07:24

and even though i loved the songs for

07:26

what they were

07:27

they lost their relevance so to me i

07:29

can't ever release that

07:30

is the only thing that you did in that

07:32

equation that that doesn't play to how

07:33

you would do that now is you announced

07:35

it

07:35

yeah when you announce it you get power

07:37

that's the plan

07:38

yeah exactly and then it goes upside

07:40

down i didn't realize you lost stuff

07:42

though oh yeah so every computer

07:44

every journal every song i've ever

07:46

written you know and i write a lot of

07:48

songs

07:49

that no one ever hears they're just for

07:51

me actually yesterday i was going

07:52

through i have a joan jett book and

07:55

i was looking at some pictures of her

07:56

getting inspired and i was like

07:58

we had the exact same handwriting and i

08:00

realized it was my handwriting i had

08:02

used her book

08:03

as my songwriting journal so if you know

08:05

if i don't have anything you just

08:07

pick up a record and just right i was

08:08

right on it and so i was like man

08:10

me and joan do have a lot in common i

08:12

even have her handwriting and then i

08:14

realized that's my handwriting yeah i do

08:16

not remember her writing about like

08:18

you know floating through space with an

08:19

astronaut so that was like

08:21

in my dead pet studio i had had a book

08:24

sitting here on this console

08:25

this console survived the fire this is

08:27

from my studio in malibu

08:29

and um yeah my dad actually was like can

08:32

i have that

08:33

i'm like dude this is what i the one

08:35

thing that we really had left

08:36

was my freaking console it's mine he's

08:38

like i know but i just got the perfect

08:40

compressor i need a place to put it

08:42

like you have to get your own damn

08:43

console this is like because my studio

08:45

was the only

08:47

thing that was left so this kind of from

08:49

here

08:50

and those signs those were that's a sign

08:53

that's the only thing i had left was my

08:54

studio that's all that was left was my

08:55

music

08:56

wow oddly you know i didn't have a lot

08:58

of my songwriting journals

09:00

in my studio because that's never i mean

09:02

for me that's never where i write a song

09:03

i never write a song in the studio can i

09:05

ask you a really weird question i've

09:06

never asked anyone because it was such a

09:08

such a unique experience that you go

09:09

through something as kind of traumatic

09:10

and life shaking as that

09:12

what is it like when you walk through

09:14

what used to be a home

09:15

dude i mean part of you wants to just

09:19

start digging through ashes

09:20

and find whatever is left you know so

09:23

part of me wants to do that and part of

09:25

you creates

09:26

the the walls and the what was there and

09:30

you can almost see pictures i mean

09:32

part of you you're i guess it's somewhat

09:34

of muscle memory of some kind you know

09:37

it starts putting it all back together

09:39

again

09:40

and then a part of you is very peaceful

09:42

i also am very

09:43

fortunate because i knew that i would

09:46

have some place to go that i would not

09:48

be displaced yeah and now so your

09:49

security's checked

09:51

my security is fine and i know that

09:53

about my life

09:54

i never stop being grateful for that

09:57

my life is extremely unique and i'm

10:00

sometimes feel overly fortunate

10:02

and i had my own guilt with that you

10:04

know so

10:05

being there there was a sense of peace

10:07

knowing that there was nothing i could

10:09

do about it

10:10

because there's times where me wanting

10:11

to control has been able for me to

10:13

create this authentic brand i never do

10:15

anything that i don't want to do

10:17

my music is exactly what i want it to be

10:18

being in control a lot of the time works

10:20

in my favor

10:21

but being obsessed with control can also

10:23

be really damaging to just being

10:26

in what the plan that the above has for

10:28

you so

10:29

i battled with that but i more so

10:33

i really felt at peace knowing that

10:35

there's nothing i can do about it and

10:37

i've taken that piece and i try to find

10:39

that

10:40

space because there's a billion other

10:43

times in your life that there's gonna be

10:45

nothing that you can do about it

10:46

having that that freedom now of not

10:49

being

10:50

just so in love with control has been

10:53

really good for me yeah it's funny you

10:54

talk about that because

10:56

if i go through and i read it from an

10:58

altitude and i said cherry pick the

11:00

events that we've all seen and heard

11:02

that's the trade of being a performer i

11:04

suppose is that

11:05

stuff gets put out here it does feel

11:07

like the moments when things have taken

11:09

you in a vastly different direction to

11:10

be the moments when you've

11:12

on the outside have being in complete

11:13

control uh-huh yeah well i

11:15

i thrive in in chaos a little bit and i

11:19

also

11:19

i don't like making decisions this is

11:22

one thing that i don't like

11:23

i do not like someone asked me to go to

11:25

dinner you choose

11:27

like i do not like me oh that's annoying

11:29

i don't like making decisions that's

11:30

because i really am kind of happy

11:31

anywhere right

11:32

i just am and until you're not until

11:34

until i'm like this place

11:35

sucks but i'm like so obviously really

11:39

i really like people kind of i mean when

11:42

it comes to my music into my

11:43

craft i really really like making my own

11:46

choices and making my own art but those

11:47

aren't really decisions

11:48

you know those aren't to me those aren't

11:50

decisions they're probably very big

11:51

decisions if you're not

11:52

used to making them all the time but

11:53

like putting out music to me isn't a big

11:55

decision it's like

11:56

it just is like it's just flowing out

11:58

constantly so i liked that

12:00

i never had to make a choice about

12:03

saying goodbye to that house it just

12:04

said goodbye to me there was no choice

12:06

in it and i really liked that about

12:08

about the non-decision-making process so

12:10

it's been a year

12:11

i mean if this is still the case and no

12:13

judgment but from what i can tell it's

12:14

been a year since you chose

12:15

sobriety right since you decided to

12:17

clear your head yeah how did it feel

12:19

when you started to wake up and realize

12:20

that that was working

12:22

well i like a lot of people you know

12:24

being completely honest during the

12:26

pandemic fell off and felt really

12:30

a lot of you know and i would never sit

12:31

here and go i've been [ __ ] sober and

12:33

i didn't and i fell off and i

12:35

realized that i now

12:39

am back on sobriety two weeks sober and

12:42

you know i feel like i really

12:46

accepted that time and one of the things

12:48

i've used

12:49

is don't get furious get curious

12:52

so don't be mad at yourself but ask

12:54

 

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

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you need to make a statement

13:11

either way i guess so i

13:13

didn't choose to make a statement i

13:15

think that

13:16

somehow i remember it was like a couple

13:18

months ago and i was doing an interview

13:20

 

 

 

 

18

you came out of this world at a young

14:20

age where it was like you can't be

14:21

malleable

14:22

yeah i know exactly yeah it's a very

14:25

obvious observation yeah apologies if

it's just

 

pure cliche do you make do you

14:29

 

 

down to the animals i mean i just

24:35

like when i love i am very loyal to

24:38

people i mean you could tell this by any

24:40

time you see me or any of my team or you

24:42

know i'm a loyal person

24:45

but there's times you know where it says

24:47

you know is it wrong that in my mind i

24:49

walk the line

 

Edited by Preety_India

INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

Cleared out ignore list today. 

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8

3:32 / 1:19:24

Transcript

00:01

[Music]

00:12

this place is cool

00:13

thank you so much i am at some point i'm

00:16

gonna

00:17

this wall is gonna go away and i'm gonna

00:19

make a big like songwriting deck out

00:20

there because i'd like to go outside we

00:21

have a little mini spot out there

00:23

but my mom came in here and spruced the

00:26

place up

00:27

and she's obsessed with putting like

00:28

photos of me with all these

00:30

people everywhere so this is like a

00:31

mother's doing i love how you came

00:33

straight in and you like and you

00:34

zeroed in on the thing that i would have

00:36

gone to and you've justified it without

00:37

me even raising it it's my [ __ ]

00:39

mother

00:40

came here today i'm like yo why because

00:41

my mom

00:43

she just is like you know she wants me

00:44

to be proud of my moments but it's just

00:46

very

00:46

like it's cute in her house but in my

00:48

house i feel like it's kind of like a

00:50

like a whole dentist you know when you

00:52

go and you're like i don't really care

00:53

whose teeth you clean like you go to

00:55

that dentist as well yeah can you clean

00:56

teeth or not

00:57

i don't care about the pictures on the

00:58

wall it's so lay how you doing

01:00

i'm doing really good i'm happy to be

01:02

talking to you you too

01:03

i was thinking it's nice actually out of

01:05

all the times you know

01:07

covid has just been just so hard on

01:10

everybody whether it's

01:12

actually physically getting the illness

01:14

or

01:15

just mentally and spiritually or you

01:18

know so many people are just

01:19

experiencing anxiety and fear but

01:22

the one great thing is you know to bring

01:25

you to

01:26

my studio bring you to my home yeah

01:28

we've never been able to sit where i was

01:30

thrilled

01:31

the music really gets i mean when it

01:32

came into my diary and it's i was like

01:33

where are we doing it

01:34

and they're like well it's it's at

01:36

miley's place i was thrilled because

01:37

you're right it started out in our place

01:39

and then it was covert orientated tech

01:41

talk

01:41

yeah i don't like that especially with

01:43

you and me you know you want to have a

01:44

real conversation and

01:46

i think with that i think timing is

01:49

everything

01:50

you know i learned that whether that was

01:52

in love or

01:54

relationships or just comedy i mean just

01:57

even to

01:58

to make people laugh to make people cry

02:00

there's a timing to all of it

02:01

and when you lose that timing and that

02:03

connection and that awareness of okay

02:06

i'm sensing what you're feeling you're

02:07

sensing what i'm feeling

02:09

when you lose that i think that's what's

02:11

kind of been causing some of this

02:12

anxiety and fear because there's an

02:14

unknowingness of the response

02:17

you lose that when you're talking

02:19

through a screen well the core of

02:20

anxiety and fears

02:21

is a desire for control and we put that

02:24

in the same conversation as time

02:26

yeah and that's why when things happen

02:27

to you it's like oh i have the worst

02:28

timing

02:29

yeah i can't believe this time that

02:30

happened yeah and it's interesting that

02:32

you would look at it from a different

02:33

perspective of like

02:34

actually i lean into the concept of time

02:36

even if at the time

02:37

it felt like a bad time also i think

02:39

there's something about

02:40

you kind of fall into the right timing

02:43

and i think there's been times where

02:45

i've wanted to rush in times where i

02:47

wanted to wait

02:48

and there's just seasons and that's been

02:51

this record for me because

02:53

this record i really was patient with

02:56

and patience you could probably get a

02:58

lot of adjectives of the things that i

03:00

am

03:00

but patient i don't think if you ask

03:02

anyone around me would necessarily be

03:04

you were sort of pushed in that

03:05

direction right because

03:07

it's so funny i was thinking back to the

03:09

last time we really spoke

03:10

well around the last album which was

03:11

younger now album album and it's funny

03:13

that title you know because i think

03:14

about like

03:15

you were really you were on a mission to

03:17

mature and to build a life for yourself

03:19

to stabilize yourself

03:20

and you called that album younger now

03:22

and it all just felt very at odds and

03:24

then 2018 the whole thing just tips

03:26

upside down as you wrote so poignantly

03:27

in your note

03:28

and i think about that that's a push

03:30

toward patience because that's about

03:32

losing control you can't control that

03:33

that must have been the problem with

03:34

looking back on it now the most

03:35

significant one of the most significant

03:37

events of your life that fire

03:38

i write down everything like i my dad

03:40

always says you know when you write it

03:41

down when you say it out loud you give

03:43

it power

03:44

you begin to create it the minute that

03:46

you write it down so i write everything

03:47

down

03:48

you know i did write about i guess it

03:50

was a push into patience but

03:51

it's now a part of my character and it's

03:54

something that i really

03:56

am proud of and it i feel it was earned

03:59

um

04:00

to be patient and as much as there's

04:03

things that

04:04

i'll miss it really what i

04:07

gained which patients being one of them

04:10

was worth it

04:11

in a sense finding a balance of feeling

04:14

detached

04:16

but still being able to connect yeah you

04:18

know yeah

04:19

i would never want someone to say you

04:21

know she just wasn't there with me she

04:23

just

04:23

you know i i do have a problem with

04:25

people that that think being protected

04:28

or guarding yourself in some way is

04:30

detachment is attachment because

04:31

if you don't protect yourself then like

04:33

take all the locks off your house

04:34

leave the keys in the car sure don't

04:36

wear shoes on your feet well also you

04:38

have a right to keep something to

04:39

yourself

04:39

i mean you or yourself before anybody

04:41

came into your life ultimately outside

04:43

you know the family that you have and

04:44

even then the minute you're born it's

04:45

your journey mm-hmm

04:46

and i wonder i've always wanted to ask

04:48

you this as you now get to a higher

04:50

state of self-awareness through your

04:51

music through your life through learning

04:53

through relationships through all of it

04:54

through maturity right it's called

04:55

maturity

04:56

do you look back now on what you were

04:59

told by your parents

05:00

what you how you acted as a kid the kind

05:02

of kid you were from that you know they

05:04

all

05:04

just had the earliest memories have you

05:06

always been this

05:07

no i mean i am not the person i was

05:10

yesterday

05:11

you know last night sitting behind you

05:14

cutting with stevie nicks on the phone

05:16

that changed me forever you know

05:17

everything changes me forever

05:19

and i'll never be

05:22

who i was yesterday in a way every night

05:26

before i go to sleep i say goodbye to

05:27

myself in a way because it's like

05:29

that person's done and there's like a

05:31

sadness to it sometimes because

05:34

i do evolve really quickly because i'm

05:37

very absorbent like i just take

05:39

everything in

05:40

yeah and recently i've had to do

05:42

inventory

05:43

of what i've owned as mine that isn't

05:46

mine because i think like you're saying

05:49

your parents so

05:50

whether it's generational or the way

05:52

that you're raised or you know

05:54

you you really do get passed through dna

05:56

yeah personality and character even fear

05:59

yeah nature versus nurture for sure you

06:01

know exactly nature versus nurture and

06:03

we're all just an equation of all those

06:05

things adding up

06:06

you know the last three years i called

06:09

it the

06:10

the cocktail of chaos because it just

06:12

felt like the worst bartender ever

06:15

which was like as the universe yeah

06:17

sometimes just kept pouring the [ __ ] and

06:19

you're like oh my god like can't drink

06:21

any more of this [ __ ] yeah and you're

06:22

just like you know

06:25

you're dizzy often that's what i mean

06:26

like when we spoke in 2017 and the album

06:28

was coming out

06:29

and you were just like i got this like i

06:32

got the relationship i got the album i

06:33

got that life i'm good

06:35

yeah and then and life just laughs it's

06:38

like

06:38

you're not done yet you know i i kind of

06:41

hate the saying but also love it that

06:43

when you make the plan

06:44

that life you know laughs at you because

06:45

i do think there's something to having

06:47

an idea of what you want and like

06:49

setting a goal and seeing it

06:51

you know i daydream a lot daydreaming

06:54

and like

06:54

seeing it all happen but not

06:58

letting it completely consume you to the

07:00

point where there's no other

07:01

opportunities you exactly and become

07:03

i never let an idea or a schedule

07:07

determine my creative choices so

07:10

listen like i made a record you and i

07:13

had talked during younger now

07:14

and then i was going and making a set of

07:16

three eps which were

07:18

amazing i was in love with the songs you

07:21

know but

07:22

those two eps weren't relevant anymore

07:24

and even though i loved the songs for

07:26

what they were

07:27

they lost their relevance so to me i

07:29

can't ever release that

07:30

is the only thing that you did in that

07:32

equation that that doesn't play to how

07:33

you would do that now is you announced

07:35

it

07:35

yeah when you announce it you get power

07:37

that's the plan

07:38

yeah exactly and then it goes upside

07:40

down i didn't realize you lost stuff

07:42

though oh yeah so every computer

07:44

every journal every song i've ever

07:46

written you know and i write a lot of

07:48

songs

07:49

that no one ever hears they're just for

07:51

me actually yesterday i was going

07:52

through i have a joan jett book and

07:55

i was looking at some pictures of her

07:56

getting inspired and i was like

07:58

we had the exact same handwriting and i

08:00

realized it was my handwriting i had

08:02

used her book

08:03

as my songwriting journal so if you know

08:05

if i don't have anything you just

08:07

pick up a record and just right i was

08:08

right on it and so i was like man

08:10

me and joan do have a lot in common i

08:12

even have her handwriting and then i

08:14

realized that's my handwriting yeah i do

08:16

not remember her writing about like

08:18

you know floating through space with an

08:19

astronaut so that was like

08:21

in my dead pet studio i had had a book

08:24

sitting here on this console

08:25

this console survived the fire this is

08:27

from my studio in malibu

08:29

and um yeah my dad actually was like can

08:32

i have that

08:33

i'm like dude this is what i the one

08:35

thing that we really had left

08:36

was my freaking console it's mine he's

08:38

like i know but i just got the perfect

08:40

compressor i need a place to put it

08:42

like you have to get your own damn

08:43

console this is like because my studio

08:45

was the only

08:47

thing that was left so this kind of from

08:49

here

08:50

and those signs those were that's a sign

08:53

that's the only thing i had left was my

08:54

studio that's all that was left was my

08:55

music

08:56

wow oddly you know i didn't have a lot

08:58

of my songwriting journals

09:00

in my studio because that's never i mean

09:02

for me that's never where i write a song

09:03

i never write a song in the studio can i

09:05

ask you a really weird question i've

09:06

never asked anyone because it was such a

09:08

such a unique experience that you go

09:09

through something as kind of traumatic

09:10

and life shaking as that

09:12

what is it like when you walk through

09:14

what used to be a home

09:15

dude i mean part of you wants to just

09:19

start digging through ashes

09:20

and find whatever is left you know so

09:23

part of me wants to do that and part of

09:25

you creates

09:26

the the walls and the what was there and

09:30

you can almost see pictures i mean

09:32

part of you you're i guess it's somewhat

09:34

of muscle memory of some kind you know

09:37

it starts putting it all back together

09:39

again

09:40

and then a part of you is very peaceful

09:42

i also am very

09:43

fortunate because i knew that i would

09:46

have some place to go that i would not

09:48

be displaced yeah and now so your

09:49

security's checked

09:51

my security is fine and i know that

09:53

about my life

09:54

i never stop being grateful for that

09:57

my life is extremely unique and i'm

10:00

sometimes feel overly fortunate

10:02

and i had my own guilt with that you

10:04

know so

10:05

being there there was a sense of peace

10:07

knowing that there was nothing i could

10:09

do about it

10:10

because there's times where me wanting

10:11

to control has been able for me to

10:13

create this authentic brand i never do

10:15

anything that i don't want to do

10:17

my music is exactly what i want it to be

10:18

being in control a lot of the time works

10:20

in my favor

10:21

but being obsessed with control can also

10:23

be really damaging to just being

10:26

in what the plan that the above has for

10:28

you so

10:29

i battled with that but i more so

10:33

i really felt at peace knowing that

10:35

there's nothing i can do about it and

10:37

i've taken that piece and i try to find

10:39

that

10:40

space because there's a billion other

10:43

times in your life that there's gonna be

10:45

nothing that you can do about it

10:46

having that that freedom now of not

10:49

being

10:50

just so in love with control has been

10:53

really good for me yeah it's funny you

10:54

talk about that because

10:56

if i go through and i read it from an

10:58

altitude and i said cherry pick the

11:00

events that we've all seen and heard

11:02

that's the trade of being a performer i

11:04

suppose is that

11:05

stuff gets put out here it does feel

11:07

like the moments when things have taken

11:09

you in a vastly different direction to

11:10

be the moments when you've

11:12

on the outside have being in complete

11:13

control uh-huh yeah well i

11:15

i thrive in in chaos a little bit and i

11:19

also

11:19

i don't like making decisions this is

11:22

one thing that i don't like

11:23

i do not like someone asked me to go to

11:25

dinner you choose

11:27

like i do not like me oh that's annoying

11:29

i don't like making decisions that's

11:30

because i really am kind of happy

11:31

anywhere right

11:32

i just am and until you're not until

11:34

until i'm like this place

11:35

sucks but i'm like so obviously really

11:39

i really like people kind of i mean when

11:42

it comes to my music into my

11:43

craft i really really like making my own

11:46

choices and making my own art but those

11:47

aren't really decisions

11:48

you know those aren't to me those aren't

11:50

decisions they're probably very big

11:51

decisions if you're not

11:52

used to making them all the time but

11:53

like putting out music to me isn't a big

11:55

decision it's like

11:56

it just is like it's just flowing out

11:58

constantly so i liked that

12:00

i never had to make a choice about

12:03

saying goodbye to that house it just

12:04

said goodbye to me there was no choice

12:06

in it and i really liked that about

12:08

about the non-decision-making process so

12:10

it's been a year

12:11

i mean if this is still the case and no

12:13

judgment but from what i can tell it's

12:14

been a year since you chose

12:15

sobriety right since you decided to

12:17

clear your head yeah how did it feel

12:19

when you started to wake up and realize

12:20

that that was working

12:22

well i like a lot of people you know

12:24

being completely honest during the

12:26

pandemic fell off and felt really

12:30

a lot of you know and i would never sit

12:31

here and go i've been [ __ ] sober and

12:33

i didn't and i fell off and i

12:35

realized that i now

12:39

am back on sobriety two weeks sober and

12:42

you know i feel like i really

12:46

accepted that time and one of the things

12:48

i've used

12:49

is don't get furious get curious

12:52

so don't be mad at yourself but ask

12:54

think about it like it just

72:24

it just comes out and i don't really

72:26

know where it comes from it's almost

72:27

like

72:28

you know like spider-man like

72:30

discovering that if he goes like this

72:31

he's got the web

72:32

it's like you know it's that it's that

72:34

like i didn't even know

72:35

i mean but even even spider-man is like

72:37

a he's a showman

72:38

you know he's like an entertainer so

72:40

like you want to see that show you want

72:42

the costume you want the whole thing

72:44

and so for me that's why i [ __ ] love

72:46

dolly parton

72:48

is because she has it all that to me is

72:51

just an ultimate icon because she's

72:52

never lied

72:53

her songs are the truth even if they

72:56

don't resonate with her now

72:57

like maybe they're she's attacked from

72:59

something she's written before that's

73:00

what happens when you have a career like

73:01

that's as expanded as hers but she

73:04

just found this balance of being

73:07

she is a superhero like she almost has a

73:10

character but it's

73:11

true and that's why i love drag queens

73:14

because

73:15

that's what debbie harry loves

73:16

jacqueline's debbie harry when she

73:17

created blondie

73:18

that was creating like a drag character

73:20

because she's like you know i'm like

73:22

in a dirty band t-shirt in my apartment

73:25

writing songs but like when i become

73:27

blondie

73:28

and then that makes it sound different i

73:30

write songs in like all different ways

73:31

but like when i write songs

73:33

not only do i see color but like i'll

73:36

see what lipstick i have on because i

73:37

see

73:38

the who's gonna whose mouth it's gonna

73:40

come out of like i see

73:42

not the person that's like you know last

73:43

night i was in a you know a sweatshirt

73:45

like recording stevie nicks

73:46

but i'm not in my mind in my mind i'm

73:50

not in my mind we are like in our witch

73:52

realness and like i'm totally in

73:55

stevie's vibe and i've got a hat on

73:57

and my hair is long and i'm like the

74:00

moon is full

74:01

and there's like wild dogs everywhere

74:04

and we're part of it and we're one of

74:06

them and that's what i where i am i'm

74:08

not in here so like

74:10

wow really like when i write a song

74:12

that's why sometimes it's even nice

74:14

to write in unfamiliar places like you

74:15

know i'll write i'll that's why i said i

74:17

don't really write songs in here that

74:18

much yeah like i don't really write

74:20

songs in the studio i write songs in the

74:21

car because they're just gonna come to

74:22

you

74:23

like you know but i think by feeling

74:26

that because in a song like when you're

74:28

writing a song you can go anywhere

74:29

in your like imagination yeah look when

74:32

we spoke three years ago i was like oh

74:34

we're gonna get to this

74:35

and so this is another step towards this

74:37

and it's like just to be in a situation

74:39

where i

74:40

have no idea what time it is i haven't

74:42

thought about it for a second

74:44

for me it's just like been a very fluid

74:46

conversation

74:47

about process around this album which

74:50

really

74:51

just finds you at a point in your life

74:53

where it's

74:54

self-awareness and acceptance

74:58

and freedom acceptance keeps finding me

75:01

like

75:01

that word it's the it's the eyes without

75:04

a face of words

75:05

it will not quit like everywhere i go

75:08

and

75:08

mindfulness yeah so mindfulness is

75:11

following me also

75:12

like i got just totally zoned into

75:15

mindfulness over the last maybe four

75:17

weeks and it's changed my life

75:18

and my final thing that i'll say of

75:20

what's been extremely helpful to me is

75:22

the best way to stay open is to never

75:25

close

75:26

so last night i had to say that to

75:28

myself repeatedly when i was like

75:30

cutting midnight sky i don't know what

75:31

it was it was something about it that

75:33

i don't know what i was really getting

75:34

like creatively blocked and like

75:36

for some reason when midnight sky

75:38

started playing i just started crying

75:39

like i don't even really know why i

75:40

guess maybe the

75:41

the fact that stevie nicks is on the

75:43

record like blew my mind but i also

75:45

i don't want to be an amateur therapist

75:46

but also it came out at a pretty

75:47

dramatic time for your family when you

75:48

lost someone close to you around the

75:49

scene yeah

75:50

i realized that the person that wrote it

75:54

isn't the person that's recunting it now

75:56

and listening to it and the way that's

75:57

already and that made me sad you know

76:00

because i was like

76:01

i'm listening to it and a lot has

76:03

changed already

76:05

like when things are different i'm

76:07

really affected by it

76:08

and like just by losing someone

76:11

relationship

76:12

changes obviously there's a big change

76:14

in the country going on like a

76:16

exchange of power and there's just all

76:18

this going on and i'm like last night

76:20

when the song started playing

76:22

in a way when i wrote it i mean but it's

76:24

just

76:25

another one we remember the past better

76:28

than it was

76:29

present worse than it is and future more

76:31

resolved than it ever will be

76:33

and so when i look at the past i'm like

76:35

when i wrote that song

76:36

it was simpler times and these are so

76:38

complicated there was a laundry list if

76:41

you would have asked me when i wrote

76:42

midnight sky

76:43

that's why i was writing it was i just

76:45

want to be in control of my narrative so

76:47

bad

76:47

i i hate when the media creates my

76:51

autobiography for me like no stop

76:53

writing my life that's what creates the

76:54

anxiety though

76:55

exactly that is the root of it which

76:57

ultimately man if it's one thing i'm

76:59

learning as i'm growing as i'm getting

77:00

on in my life and and my kids are

77:02

growing up and everything else it's like

77:04

as and where you can apply those two

77:07

words

77:08

that sit there just waiting to be used

77:09

and are always at arm's reach

77:11

which i'll let go yeah i love that

77:12

that's why i wrote you know on my record

77:14

it's like i think you're really gonna

77:15

like this record

77:16

but if you don't [ __ ] you because it's

77:18

like i [ __ ] love it and

77:20

i think there is a balance i think that

77:21

is the car like to me like the best

77:24

you know carly simon like i love you're

77:26

so vain because i love that the chorus

77:28

you know that's as iconic as happy

77:30

birthday like that is like the simplest

77:32

most mainstream amazing but the verses

77:34

are so

77:34

weird and like so storytelling and

77:37

that's the one thing that i thought

77:38

me andrew watt andrew wyatt

77:41

mark ronson you know we really found

77:45

on this album is that i dolly parton

77:48

i've inherited this song writing i grew

77:50

up listening johnny cash i grew up with

77:52

nina john jett

77:53

and i i have that in me but also

77:56

like i've also grown up listening to

77:58

gwen stefani who really did that kind of

78:00

best you know she got to just have the

78:02

best of both worlds to not be ashamed of

78:04

anything yeah

78:05

um she really did and how to find that

78:07

merch how to be

78:08

everything how to be the melting pot of

78:10

everything that i've ever loved

78:12

and not be ashamed of like some of my

78:14

guilty pleasures of music that you know

78:16

that i've wanted to

78:17

that have inspired me and like how to

78:18

make it my own and just a sense of like

78:20

the shame just it doesn't it's not

78:22

helpful so i guess what

78:24

started that tangent was that originally

78:27

the shame came out

78:28

and now i'm just getting a little more

78:30

hyper aware to go like oh no i actually

78:31

don't feel that way detached attached

78:33

from that i

78:34

have a fear of writing new music because

78:37

what i've been is so

78:38

large um not anymore

78:42

no i'm really excited for this record to

78:44

come out because it's just

78:45

i it's the most proud i could be of

78:47

anything and you know again

78:49

i just feel like just so much gratitude

78:52

towards the collaborators who helped me

78:53

create it

78:54

you know here's the thing you'll make

78:55

another one yeah and another one

78:57

i already am i already am this song was

79:00

this

79:01

album was 12 songs long somehow i think

79:03

it's 15 right now

79:04

it's i've added three songs since it

79:06

came out twelve plus two covers

79:08

twelve two covers and now midnight's

79:09

guys stevie nicks

79:11

so now when i printed this record two

79:14

weeks ago

79:15

it was a twelve song album it's 15. so

79:18

that's the great thing about digital

79:19

you're already making another one i can

79:20

just keep adding i love it

English (auto-generated)

 


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Miley Cyrus 

I say goodnight to the person I was that day. 

 


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Miley Cyrus 

I write down everything. 

Like if you write and say it loud, you begin to give it power. 

Finding a balance between being able to detach but still being able to  connect. 

You're not done yet. 

I do evolve very quickly because I'm very absorbent, like I take everything in and. 


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3:32 / 1:19:24

Transcript

00:01

[Music]

00:12

this place is cool

00:13

thank you so much i am at some point i'm

gonna

this wall is gonna go away and i'm gonna

make a big like songwriting deck out

there because i'd like to go outside we

have a little mini spot out there

but my mom came in here and spruced the

place up and she's obsessed with putting like photos of me with all these

people everywhere so this is like a mother's doing i love how you came straight in and you like and you zeroed in on the thing that i would have gone to and you've justified it without me even raising it it's my [ __ ]

mother came here today i'm like yo why because

my mom

she just is like you know she wants me to be proud of my moments but it's just very like it's cute in her house but in my

house i feel like it's kind of like a

like a whole dentist you know when you

go and you're like i don't really care

whose teeth you clean like you go to that dentist as well yeah can you clean teeth or not

i don't care about the pictures on the

wall it's so lay how you doing

i'm doing really good i'm happy to be

01:02

talking to you you too

i was thinking it's nice actually out of

all the times you know

covid has just been just so hard on

everybody whether it's

actually physically getting the illness

or

just mentally and spiritually or you

know so many people are just

experiencing anxiety and fear but

the one great thing is you know to bring

you to

my studio bring you to my home yeah

we've never been able to sit where i was

thrilled

the music really gets i mean when it

came into my diary and it's i was like

01:33

where are we doing it

and they're like well it's it's at

miley's place i was thrilled because

you're right it started out in our place

and then it was covert orientated tech

talk

yeah i don't like that especially with

you and me you know you want to have a

real conversation and

i think with that i think timing is

everything

you know i learned that whether that was

in love or

relationships or just comedy i mean just

even to

to make people laugh to make people cry

there's a timing to all of it

and when you lose that timing and that

connection and that awareness of okay

i'm sensing what you're feeling you're

sensing what i'm feeling

when you lose that i think that's what's

kind of been causing some of this

anxiety and fear because there's an

unknowingness of the response

you lose that when you're talking

through a screen well the core of

anxiety and fears

is a desire for control and we put that in the same conversation as time

yeah and that's why when things happen

to you it's like oh i have the worst

timing

yeah i can't believe this time that

happened yeah and it's interesting that

you would look at it from a different

perspective of like

actually i lean into the concept of time even if at the time

it felt like a bad time also i think

there's something about

you kind of fall into the right timing

and i think there's been times where

i've wanted to rush in times where i

wanted to wait

and there's just seasons and that's been this record for me because this record i really was patient with

and patience you could probably get a

lot of adjectives of the things that i

am

but patient i don't think if you ask

anyone around me would necessarily be

you were sort of pushed in that

direction right because

it's so funny i was thinking back to the

last time we really spoke

well around the last album which was

younger now album album and it's funny

that title you know because i think

about like

you were really you were on a mission to

mature and to build a life for yourself

to stabilize yourself

and you called that album younger now

and it all just felt very at odds and

then 2018 the whole thing just tips

upside down as you wrote so poignantly

in your note

and i think about that that's a push

toward patience because that's about

losing control you can't control that

that must have been the problem with

looking back on it now the most

significant one of the most significant

events of your life that fire

i write down everything like i my dad

always says you know when you write it

down when you say it out loud you give

it power

you begin to create it the minute that

you write it down so i write everything

down

you know i did write about i guess it

was a push into patience but

it's now a part of my character and it's

something that i really

am proud of and it i feel it was earned

um

to be patient and as much as there's

04:03

things that

i'll miss it really what i

gained which patients being one of them

was worth it

in a sense finding a balance of feeling

detached

but still being able to connect yeah you

know yeah

i would never want someone to say you

know she just wasn't there with me she

just

you know i i do have a problem with

people that that think being protected

or guarding yourself in some way is

detachment is attachment because

if you don't protect yourself then like

04:33

take all the locks off your house

leave the keys in the car sure don't

wear shoes on your feet well also you

have a right to keep something t

yourself

i mean you or yourself before anybody

came into your life ultimately outside

you know the family that you have and

even then the minute you're born it's

your journey mm-hmm

and i wonder i've always wanted to ask

you this as you now get to a higher

state of self-awareness through your

music through your life through learning

through relationships through all of it

through maturity right it's called

maturity

do you look back now on what you were

told by your parents

what you how you acted as a kid the kind

of kid you were from that you know they

all

just had the earliest memories have you

always been this

no i mean i am not the person i was

yesterday

you know last night sitting behind you

cutting with stevie nicks on the phone

that changed me forever you know

everything changes me forever

and i'll never be

who i was yesterday in a way every night

05:26

before i go to sleep i say goodbye to

myself in a way because it's like

that person's done and there's like a

sadness to it sometimes because

i do evolve really quickly because i'm

very absorbent like i just take

everything in

yeah and recently i've had to do

inventory

of what i've owned as mine that isn't

mine because i think like you're saying

your parents so

whether it's generational or the way

that you're raised or you know

you you really do get passed through dna

05:56

yeah personality and character even fear

yeah nature versus nurture for sure you

know exactly nature versus nurture and

we're all just an equation of all those

things adding up

you know the last three years i called

it the

the cocktail of chaos because it just

felt like the worst bartender ever

which was like as the universe yeah

06:17

sometimes just kept pouring the [ __ ] and

you're like oh my god like can't drink

any more of this [ __ ] yeah and you're

just like you know

you're dizzy often that's what i mean

like when we spoke in 2017 and the album

was coming out

and you were just like i got this like i

got the relationship i got the album I 

got that life i'm good

yeah and then and life just laughs it's

like

you're not done yet you know i i kind of

hate the saying but also love it that

when you make the plan

that life you know laughs at you because

i do think there's something to having

an idea of what you want and like

setting a goal and seeing it

you know i daydream a lot daydreaming

and like

seeing it all happen but not

letting it completely consume you to the

point where there's no other

opportunities you exactly and become

i never let an idea or a schedule

07:07

determine my creative choices so

listen like i made a record you and i

had talked during younger now

and then i was going and making a set of

three eps which were

amazing i was in love with the songs you

know but

those two eps weren't relevant anymore

and even though i loved the songs for

07:26

what they were

they lost their relevance so to me i

can't ever release that

is the only thing that you did in that

equation that that doesn't play to how

you would do that now is you announced

it

yeah when you announce it you get power

that's the plan

yeah exactly and then it goes upside

down i didn't realize you lost stuff

though oh yeah so every computer

every journal every song i've ever

written you know and i write a lot of

songs

that no one ever hears they're just for

me actually yesterday i was going

through i have a joan jett book and

i was looking at some pictures of her

getting inspired and i was like

we had the exact same handwriting and i

realized it was my handwriting i had

used her book

as my songwriting journal so if you know

if i don't have anything you just

08:07

pick up a record and just right i was

right on it and so i was like man

me and joan do have a lot in common i

even have her handwriting and then i

realized that's my handwriting yeah i do not remember her writing about like

you know floating through space with an

astronaut so that was like

in my dead pet studio i had had a book

sitting here on this console

this console survived the fire this is from my studio in malibu

and um yeah my dad actually was like can

i have that

i'm like dude this is what i the one

thing that we really had left was my freaking console it's mine he's

like i know but i just got the perfect

compressor i need a place to put it

like you have to get your own damn

console this is like because my studio

was the only

thing that was left so this kind of from

here

and those signs those were that's a sign

that's the only thing i had left was my

studio that's all that was left was my music

wow oddly you know i didn't have a lot

of my songwriting journals in my studio because that's never i mean

for me that's never where i write a song

i never write a song in the studio can I ask you a really weird question I've never asked anyone because it was such a

such a unique experience that you go through something as kind of traumatic and life shaking as that what is it like when you walk through

what used to be a home

dude i mean part of you wants to just

start digging through ashes

and find whatever is left you know so

part of me wants to do that and part of

you creates

09:26

the the walls and the what was there and

you can almost see pictures i mean

part of you you're i guess it's somewhat

of muscle memory of some kind you know it starts putting it all back together again

and then a part of you is very peaceful

i also am very

fortunate because i knew that i would

have some place to go that i would not

be displaced yeah and now so your

security's checked

my security is fine and i know that

about my life

i never stop being grateful for that

my life is extremely unique and i'm

10:00

sometimes feel overly fortunate

and i had my own guilt with that you

know so

being there there was a sense of peace

knowing that there was nothing i could

do about it

because there's times where me wanting

to control has been able for me to

create this authentic brand i never do

anything that i don't want to do

10:17

my music is exactly what i want it to be

10:18

being in control a lot of the time works

in my favor

but being obsessed with control can also

be really damaging to just being

in what the plan that the above has for

you so I  battled with that but i more so

i really felt at peace knowing that

there's nothing i can do about it and

i've taken that piece and i try to find

that space because there's a billion other

times in your life that there's gonna be

nothing that you can do about it

having that that freedom now of not

being

just so in love with control has been really good for me yeah it's funny you talk about that because

if i go through and i read it from an

altitude and i said cherry pick the

events that we've all seen and heard

that's the trade of being a performer i

suppose is that

stuff gets put out here it does feel

like the moments when things have taken

you in a vastly different direction to

be the moments when you've

on the outside have being in complete

control uh-huh yeah well i

i thrive in in chaos a little bit and i

also

11:19

i don't like making decisions this is

one thing that i don't like

i do not like someone asked me to go to

dinner you choose

like i do not like me oh that's annoying

i don't like making decisions that's because i really am kind of happy

anywhere right

i just am and until you're not until

until i'm like this place sucks but i'm like so obviously really 

i really like people kind of i mean when it comes to my music into my craft i really really like making my own

choices and making my own art but those aren't really decisions

you know those aren't to me those aren't decisions they're probably very big

decisions if you're not

used to making them all the time but like putting out music to me isn't a big

decision it's like

it just is like it's just flowing out

constantly so i liked that

i never had to make a choice about saying goodbye to that house it just said goodbye to me there was no choice

in it and i really liked that about

about the non-decision-making process so

it's been a year

i mean if this is still the case and no

judgment but from what i can tell it's

been a year since you chose

sobriety right since you decided to

clear your head yeah how did it feel

when you started to wake up and realize that that was working well i like a lot of people you know being completely honest during the pandemic fell off and felt really a lot of you know and i would never sit here and go i've been [ __ ] sober and

i didn't and i fell off and I realized that i now am back on sobriety two weeks sober and you know i feel like i really accepted that time and one of the things

i've used is don't get furious get curious so don't be mad at yourself but ask

 

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3:32 / 1:19:24

Transcript

00:01

[Music]

00:12

this place is cool

00:13

thank you so much i am at some point i'm

gonna

this wall is gonna go away and i'm gonna

make a big like songwriting deck out

there because i'd like to go outside we

have a little mini spot out there

but my mom came in here and spruced the

place up and she's obsessed with putting like photos of me with all these

people everywhere so this is like a mother's doing i love how you came straight in and you like and you zeroed in on the thing that i would have gone to and you've justified it without me even raising it it's my [ __ ]

mother came here today i'm like yo why because

my mom

she just is like you know she wants me to be proud of my moments but it's just very like it's cute in her house but in my

house i feel like it's kind of like a

like a whole dentist you know when you

go and you're like i don't really care

whose teeth you clean like you go to that dentist as well yeah can you clean teeth or not

i don't care about the pictures on the

wall it's so lay how you doing

i'm doing really good i'm happy to be

01:02

talking to you you too

i was thinking it's nice actually out of

all the times you know

covid has just been just so hard on

everybody whether it's

actually physically getting the illness

or

just mentally and spiritually or you

know so many people are just

experiencing anxiety and fear but

the one great thing is you know to bring

you to

my studio bring you to my home yeah

we've never been able to sit where i was

thrilled

the music really gets i mean when it

came into my diary and it's i was like

01:33

where are we doing it

and they're like well it's it's at

miley's place i was thrilled because

you're right it started out in our place

and then it was covert orientated tech

talk

yeah i don't like that especially with

you and me you know you want to have a

real conversation and

i think with that i think timing is

everything

you know i learned that whether that was

in love or

relationships or just comedy i mean just

even to

to make people laugh to make people cry

there's a timing to all of it

and when you lose that timing and that

connection and that awareness of okay

i'm sensing what you're feeling you're

sensing what i'm feeling

when you lose that i think that's what's

kind of been causing some of this

anxiety and fear because there's an

unknowingness of the response

you lose that when you're talking

through a screen well the core of

anxiety and fears

is a desire for control and we put that in the same conversation as time

yeah and that's why when things happen

to you it's like oh i have the worst

timing

yeah i can't believe this time that

happened yeah and it's interesting that

you would look at it from a different

perspective of like

actually i lean into the concept of time even if at the time

it felt like a bad time also i think

there's something about

you kind of fall into the right timing

and i think there's been times where

i've wanted to rush in times where i

wanted to wait

and there's just seasons and that's been this record for me because this record i really was patient with

and patience you could probably get a

lot of adjectives of the things that i

am

but patient i don't think if you ask

anyone around me would necessarily be

you were sort of pushed in that

direction right because

it's so funny i was thinking back to the

last time we really spoke

well around the last album which was

younger now album album and it's funny

that title you know because i think

about like

you were really you were on a mission to

mature and to build a life for yourself

to stabilize yourself

and you called that album younger now

and it all just felt very at odds and

then 2018 the whole thing just tips upside down as you wrote so poignantly in your note and i think about that that's a push toward patience because that's about losing control you can't control that

that must have been the problem with looking back on it now the most significant one of the most significant

events of your life that fire

i write down everything like i my dad

always says you know when you write it

down when you say it out loud you give

it power you begin to create it the minute that you write it down so i write everything

down

you know i did write about i guess it was a push into patience but

it's now a part of my character and it's something that i really am proud of and it i feel it was earned

um

to be patient and as much as there's

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things that

i'll miss it really what i

gained which patients being one of them

was worth it

in a sense finding a balance of feeling

detached

but still being able to connect yeah you

know yeah

i would never want someone to say you

know she just wasn't there with me she

just

you know i i do have a problem with

people that that think being protected

or guarding yourself in some way is

detachment is attachment because

if you don't protect yourself then like

04:33

take all the locks off your house

leave the keys in the car sure don't

wear shoes on your feet well also you

have a right to keep something t

yourself

i mean you or yourself before anybody

came into your life ultimately outside

you know the family that you have and

even then the minute you're born it's

your journey mm-hmm

and i wonder i've always wanted to ask

you this as you now get to a higher

state of self-awareness through your

music through your life through learning

through relationships through all of it

through maturity right it's called

maturity

do you look back now on what you were

told by your parents

what you how you acted as a kid the kind

of kid you were from that you know they

all

just had the earliest memories have you

always been this

no i mean i am not the person i was

yesterday

you know last night sitting behind you

cutting with stevie nicks on the phone

that changed me forever you know

everything changes me forever

and i'll never be

who i was yesterday in a way every night

05:26

before i go to sleep i say goodbye to

myself in a way because it's like

that person's done and there's like a

sadness to it sometimes because

i do evolve really quickly because i'm

very absorbent like i just take

everything in

yeah and recently i've had to do

inventory

of what i've owned as mine that isn't

mine because i think like you're saying

your parents so

whether it's generational or the way

that you're raised or you know

you you really do get passed through dna

05:56

yeah personality and character even fear

yeah nature versus nurture for sure you

know exactly nature versus nurture and

we're all just an equation of all those

things adding up

you know the last three years i called

it the

the cocktail of chaos because it just

felt like the worst bartender ever

which was like as the universe yeah

 

 

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sometimes just kept pouring the [ __ ] and

you're like oh my god like can't drink

any more of this [ __ ] yeah and you're

just like you know

you're dizzy often that's what i mean

like when we spoke in 2017 and the album

was coming out

and you were just like i got this like i

got the relationship i got the album I 

got that life i'm good

yeah and then and life just laughs it's

like

you're not done yet you know i i kind of

hate the saying but also love it that

when you make the plan

that life you know laughs at you because

i do think there's something to having

an idea of what you want and like

setting a goal and seeing it you know i daydream a lot daydreaming

and like seeing it all happen but not

letting it completely consume you to the

point where there's no other

opportunities you exactly and become

i never let an idea or a schedule

07:07

determine my creative choices so

listen like i made a record you and i

had talked during younger now

and then i was going and making a set of

three eps which were

amazing i was in love with the songs you

know but

those two eps weren't relevant anymore

and even though i loved the songs for

07:26

what they were

they lost their relevance so to me i

can't ever release that

is the only thing that you did in that

equation that that doesn't play to how

you would do that now is you announced

it

yeah when you announce it you get power

that's the plan

yeah exactly and then it goes upside

down i didn't realize you lost stuff

though oh yeah so every computer

every journal every song i've ever

written you know and i write a lot of

songs

that no one ever hears they're just for

me actually yesterday i was going

through i have a joan jett book and

i was looking at some pictures of her

getting inspired and i was like

we had the exact same handwriting and i

realized it was my handwriting i had

used her book

as my songwriting journal so if you know

if i don't have anything you just

 

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INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

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if i don't have anything you just

08:07

pick up a record and just right i was

right on it and so i was like man

me and joan do have a lot in common i

even have her handwriting and then i

realized that's my handwriting yeah i do not remember her writing about like

you know floating through space with an

astronaut so that was like

in my dead pet studio i had had a book

sitting here on this console

this console survived the fire this is from my studio in malibu

and um yeah my dad actually was like can

i have that

i'm like dude this is what i the one

thing that we really had left was my freaking console it's mine he's

like i know but i just got the perfect

compressor i need a place to put it

like you have to get your own damn

console this is like because my studio

was the only

thing that was left so this kind of from

here

and those signs those were that's a sign

that's the only thing i had left was my

studio that's all that was left was my music

wow oddly you know i didn't have a lot

of my songwriting journals in my studio because that's never i mean

for me that's never where i write a song

i never write a song in the studio can I ask you a really weird question I've never asked anyone because it was such a

such a unique experience that you go through something as kind of traumatic and life shaking as that what is it like when you walk through

what used to be a home

dude i mean part of you wants to just

start digging through ashes

and find whatever is left you know so

part of me wants to do that and part of

you creates

09:26

the the walls and the what was there and

you can almost see pictures i mean

part of you you're i guess it's somewhat

of muscle memory of some kind you know it starts putting it all back together again

and then a part of you is very peaceful

i also am very

fortunate because i knew that i would

have some place to go that i would not

be displaced yeah and now so your

security's checked

my security is fine and i know that

about my life

i never stop being grateful for that

my life is extremely unique and i'm

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INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

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