How To Not Confuse Real Love with Limerence

[Melancholy]

In a nutshell: How to stop loving a person who doesn't love you without feeling hurt about it.
I believe it is a good topic because it is essential to know how to deal with a broken hurt heart.

[Preety_India]

 

Maybe this chart will help you understand the difference between love and limerence. 

In love, you want to love that person. 

 

In Limerence, you only want that person. That person is an object of having or possession. 

My ex showed tendencies of limerence towards me. In the end its very hurtful to know that the person only wants you but doesn't love you. 

[Melancholy]

21 hours ago, Preety_India said:

 

Maybe this chart will help you understand the difference between love and limerence. 

In love, you want to love that person. 

 

In Limerence, you only want that person. That person is an object of having or possession. 

My ex showed tendencies of limerence towards me. In the end its very hurtful to know that the person only wants you but doesn't love you. 

I appreciate the fact that you are trying to help me understand it.
There are many misconceptions about what love between two people really is.
One point of the chart stood out to me: "Based on physical attraction or popularity". Why? Because I have always believed that popularity is a huge key factor to make someone fall in love with you but is this really how love works? Just be popular and everyone will love you? What worth does it even have that someone falls in love with you? Someone can accept you or reject you, you can never know but what worth does it even have when it is based on pure luck? Wow, if someone accept me then I got lucky but when not then I got unlucky?

I was suggesting it because I believe Leo makes very good videos and it could help me out hearing his thoughts and beliefs about it.
It would help me a lot if I finally understand what real love means otherwise I always fall into the trap that what I am experiencing between another person is real love when in reality it is just based on how the other person looks for me (physical attraction) or how popular I am with the women (popularity).

Howsoever, I appreciate your input but I believe I need a little bit more explaining to really understand it.
There needs a distinction to be made what love is and what not.

"My ex showed tendencies of limerence towards me. In the end its very hurtful to know that the person only wants you but doesn't love you. " I feel very sorry for you. I hope you have recovered from it.

Edited August 4, 2020 by Melancholy