You're Not Happy Because You Don't Really Want To Be Summary

[Juan Cruz Giusto]

If you are aware enough, you will realize that you are actually not happy. The real reason you are not happy is because you don’t want to, even though it sounds really insane.

People are actually pursuing conditional happiness. It means that you would only be happy if things go the way you want to; but this is very illogical.

 

If you could be unconditionally happy, what would you decide? (really think about the question?). If you say yes, this would mean:

-          You wouldn’t need food, water, sex, shelter, family, have fun, friends, etc.

-          You would be happy no matter what (even if your family is murdered).

What you have been doing all the time is putting rules and conditions to happiness (I will be happy when…). Your entire motivational system in life has been predicated upon achievement of things and goal, but if you could be happy with anything, why would you do the things you do. The problem is you don’t know what to do with yourself when you are actually happy.

Instead of focusing on things that would bring you happiness, focus on happiness itself. You actually want fulfillment, not the goals you want to achieve! YOUR ULTIMATE GOAL IS HAPPINESS!

The rule you say to yourself is: I will be happy when… Positive motivation and negative motivation are actually neurotic; you shouldn’t be happy when you get stuff done as you shouldn’t be sad when you don’t; you should be happy anyway. When you say you want conditional happiness (consciously or unconsciously), you are creating misery for yourself.

Your suffering is really unnecessary and doesn’t help to change situations. You actually don’t need suffering to take action, you make it neurotic! You need to change your entire foundation of how you are motivated.

Since you don’t have authentic motivation, you label yourself as a businessman or a healthy person so you take action in order to maintain your identity (you will sacrifice happiness to maintain your identity).

You are not pursuing happiness; you are pursuing the things that you think that will need to happiness. If you want to be really happy, you need to let go some of these rules (but it is extremely difficult for you).

You need to ask yourself: Why do I feel I need …. To be happy? It usually boils down to a feeling of deficiency inside of you in some way, like a hole that need to be filled and you actually believe that if you feel that hole you will feel complete. You need to understand that the holes that you feel cannot be completed with physical things or with any kind of achievement in the external world. If you look deep enough, you will realize that you are already complete and all holes are illusions, there are no holes in you. You don’t need anything to be happy.

The question now is; why would I do things at all? You will realize that really it doesn’t matter what the experience is, you can learn to every experience and enjoy the magic in every experience, not matter what are you experiencing (from having sex to dying or being tortured). The fact that there is even an experience at all, it still a remarkable thing (the problem is that we were disconnected with the magic of experience itself).

A test to discover your happiness level: If you lock yourself in a box forever, can you still be happy? Highly developed people don’t need shit to be happy; you don’t actually need anything to be happy.

Notice that when you are detached (don’t need) something, it doesn’t mean you are never gonna experience it again, it means that you are not attached to it.

YOU DON’T REALLY HOW EXTRAORDINARY IT FEELS SIMPLY TO BE CONSCIOUS!

Detachment doesn’t make you depressed, or nihilistic; it frees you up to do whatever the fuck you want. Even when you are enjoying something but you are attached to it, you actually suffer.

In order to say yes to unconditional happiness, everything in your life will have to be changed and refactored, you need to realize that you were just pretending to be happy.

Right now you have some assumptions like:

-          I need money to be happy

-          I need sex to be happy

-          I need to have an impact in the world

-          Etc

You need to contemplate about them and realize that these rules for happiness are backfiring you and you have forgotten that the point of life is not to do stuff or to be busy, the point is pure happiness. When you shed awareness to your neurotic motivations they will start to crumble and you will feel lost: trust that your motivation will come back to you and in a more authentic and divine way.

Edited July 25, 2016 by Juan Cruz Giusto