New Journal [CD Process] -> Dev -> Rev -> Process

[KosmicGeng]

I could not find a right title, and there are a billions of issues, due to the nature of what I went through and health, I have not been able to find anyone to help me with the issues since birth, and the ideas and solutions I have are mostly destroyed by the inability for humanity or the others; to be more spiritually insightful to get into the root cause, hence it's my responsibility to find a solution, I have been looking into archetypes based on the fundamental notions of some calculations and time, and time archetypes as I had some "chrone" types of experiences, and integral psychology the book creates, a lot of insight, but I feel and notice the doubt of humanity and the weight of that pain.

I have been looking for stability with other, but the hypernarccistic expansion of perception and the in-abillity of the social structure of once here once was empathy has turned into a desire for capital money, gain and the denial the money and value is part of love, and the core issue of love.

So many, things happend:
 

• I still ruminate suicide a lot, due to issues of thought and the pain I have since birth, but most psychologist are stuck in moder-post-modern levels of thinking from problems that stem from pre-rational to post-rational levels, and the pain of correcting or healing myself is awesome, but it's a lot of racist remnants from WWI and the effects of interacting with people here and their pain-body with Rudolf Steiner and Tesla, and other scientist how racist that era was, and how much violence has occurred, and the issue of the Ideation of race itself, d.n.a., turkey and Iran especially, their ideaology, the issue of color, and just my recent experiences. I got banned as I could not handle anymore my "coping" and the issue of being more social to be and get help, and that dragon swallowing you and devouring you etc.
   
• I found out that Leo's first name was part of Greeks Odyssee, with Alexander, Dimitri and Leo and the issue of Christ and religion and the whole issue with nature mystecism, the regress Ken Wilber was talking about and more patterns that I was correct, but could not express due to pain, especially as my first name is Dimitri, and I am using Wu-Xing generally speaking I had so many odd experiences and they all are Kriyas, I made to many excellent choices that turned into pure hell and purgatory, from multiple perspectives, the larger whole of what I yearn to say is:
   
• I found some answers if I will ever unify my psychedelic experiences and find possible terms and alternative terms or simply nothing to see and experience the credibility 

I found out a lot about humans; but I really required a forum or medium, so many things technically broke, as I learned and I found new patterns and ideas, but the core issue is the translation to put it into my understanding of Wilbers framework, and the core issues I had in my family, I yearned also to post this publically, as this was the only thing that gave me safety to the pain of the lies and the education of what I experienced with my mother, and her racist attitudes as well as inabillity to empathize due to them, like white liberals need white liberal training as they are in lie, they only seek lust, but can't find the meridian to turn lust and love into the purity of spirit, soul and evolution... most black men and I am partially black and others do that, and that level of commitment and depth goes to the deepest levels of rumi.... 

I found some answers in terms of order and vision, but the issue of the scientific paradigm and statistics, especially and worldviews since the 19th hundreds has internally not changed for me in my friendships, especially recently they have all been part of that and I had very deep revelations of the nature of spirit, but to read the symbolic holism and integrative hierachy behind it, as well as mastering integral language, as the more deeper you get I am 100% confinced that Lucifer and Ahriman did incarnate from this Paul Check video, and that fundamentally caused the issue with Iran.

It's the deepst archetypal hunch I have due to this IW/IR patterning and the synchronicity of the time and birth of my favorite book integral psychology as many answers are applied, I cry so often, I can't even get to the notes due to the level of insights that pattern alone created the notes and last sections or Ken Wilber himself is a very deep IW/IR integrative patterning from BaZi.

Science has to advanced into the true spirit of the causal, Steiner etc. to reinterpret that without their statistical bias, and the lack of scientific rigour ever since latin and greek disappeared bothers me deeply ever since I lived here, the lack of integration in that space, especially to let go and cleanse out pain is incredible.

Btw, this is the best channel I found for meditation recently, I am very much done with stuff, but I yearn to understand Gödel, Nikola Tesla, Lada Love Lace, and some secret societies and orders, to take the esoteric and see what was exotertically true, and some mathematical allegories eventually, if I can get into 4d space downloads and insights, and the core issue of being a passionate mathematician, identity, and the current issue of our times.

I'd like to report I went through so much, this place has been the only refuge I had, when society is utterly crumbling, but integral is building some human space to heal from that era, tbh. I am personally as a German not over WWII Shinzen and others telling me about the traditions as they are afraid they die, and the anger as well as compassion for and with Iran, and I've been using BaZi and Steiner as a lense, as the Wu-Xing, Goethe etc. are interconnected, but to write with that purity and the issue of IW/IR I saw what happens with Wilber, myself and my aunt, God will bend you, God will break you, and your will is your will. YOU ARE ONE. 

That is the entire issue I go through let alone with my own real names, how far they echo back into eternity, and the issues of how many traditions have realized GOD, has brought nothing back or stabilizing it.

The only thing humanity should to is to stabilize god, and reduce violence and heal. The level of commitment and what I envisioned and if it's true, but most issues I had are more survival especially as a lot of trust in humanity has been broken, and a lot of things deepended on this pattern, but it turned so evil.

I want, there are a lot of issues, due to success, and the issue of GOLD as well as the issue of beauty and GOD, Goethe and GOD and the interconnections, but I will make this a brief recollcetion!

[KosmicGeng]

Sorry I posted twice, I could not delete that I will keep this journal and look for a way to delete that, generally speaking and I got into stuff I am re-framing with A.I, my core suspicion that integral had to many secrets and the revelation of secrets since Epstein etc. what I had to read in university even about secret societies and my own interests with esoteric history, like a Witch Doctor or Voodoo priest technically, I see Leo's points, but mentally on a causal level I am reframing things very differently similar to a "Throne/Chrone" or what is depicted as a golden carriage, in Daoism. 

The levels of intuitive overlap would be very high, but due to the issue of integration this happend:

• Defining precise terminology via language
• The pain of interconnecting and the issue that my tech broke so often for a reason to fix and heal
• The underbelly for me of green/yellow and the experience with the ex, and the fragmented sexual experiences
• Sadghuru and his wive whole india as synchronicity via Daoism etc. It shocks me she went on the day I was born, (not year) and yearning to understand my health

[KosmicGeng]

I will post what creates and gives me hope, love, qualia and insight, I have been buying books, but I have been crying due to the stupidity of myself and humanity to evolve and I really had a lot of emotional breakthroughs the point is through the hyper narccistic bubble of feelings first pain later, there will never be any purification possible, only the constant process of purification which is the paveway to hell as intent exists.

The entire issue of Rumi and Yang Wood Dog or XU existence and purple Daoism, & Jung archetypes and the confusion there what is higher, what is lower, and my own cosmic blueprint, inspiration and god. The issue of the Yellow Emporer with DO/7k and the entire history/"papers" and lectures I went through I had insight overflow, and been contemplating how strongly tech died, as humans do not even love their own entertainment, play and love anymore, especially the humans I saw as my human. 

Let's speak latter... I hope freedom of thoughts exist and persist, I can't provide as much clarity as I want due to pain and the compatability via BaZi and Wu-Xing as well as the issue of the axioms of my abstractions mind/body&heart, spirituality that claims is science, but has not fully understood abrahamic religion and jesus, and my overexictement as I am like Wilber and my intuition was right all along, but it really depends a lot on WWI interpretation we have forgotten ourselves, if you'd do statistic right, and I am not Napoleon the water horse ( I am speaking from Yi-Jings etc.) you'd be suprised to what the actual truth is of nature mystecism. 

I am very glad I started that, as only the dimension of depth, insight, expansion and contraction, the whole wu-wei paradigm of love, and the interconnections of Yin&Yang Zen as True Zen and ZEN AS GOD, which has been the hardest issue, annihilation, Rumi and other things, as well as the level of esoteric practice that work, you can go through the entire globe with maps and go through every single node of intuition abstract with yourself, the whole Socratic process, then with a.i etc. 

Saw, Rinse, Contemplate value, exemplify, demystify, I feel for today at least that I am back towards starting a path towards my own Philosophy and transcending the issue separation and Ennea 4 issues that are hyperly expanded.

I found many intuitive and real tools to measure energy, but the current issue is what I intuited as a Kid with Charles Darwin and Lamark.

Science had a lot of secrets way more than the world, that is why we life, CHRONE IS TIME we have the all-seeing eye, the issue with time lord and the whole archetypal protection, from a YAHAWE perspective or what I intuited from the kabbalah, and technically my life path is associated very highly, to integrate that, but the physical issue (let alone the illusion of existence - Rumi & annihilation) the issue of how dangerous spirituality or religion is and what happend with Iran... especially how I framed it I could only see it via BaZi, and my own biased and racist attitudes mostly stemming from my environments interpretation of WWI and South Korea and North Korea, they hide that information and that is what I feared as a child and had to let go not knowing, as this world only conscious... therefore I AM. 

There are archetypal patterns, due to some natures of the biases, especially if you get into Na-Yins, Daoism and BaZi as a reference point for spirituality where a lot of shadow work has not been done and created by me, especially Yin-Water Ox manipulation, deceit and leadership being very weak for the weak, it's a lack of patience, Chinese history, Xiamen and Deng Xiao Ping. 

I hope I can interconnect this, as I've been there done that..., yet the energy and the contemplation I really yearn to talk and continue to work with the material of Keith Witt, if I am fortunate in order to create a paradigm of love, as the only thing that works is the esoteric, not the exoterisch, and the lies especially of Enneagramm 8's, 9's and 1's mostly body types I faced, and the issue of 4's as stability not finding together as they can't even reveal their differences. 

I guess we go slow... as Wilber is injured, but to realize I have partially reincarnated that pattern was just obvious to beginn with if WWIII ever breaks out with this mass underlying hysteria and lack of freedom. 

I don't know if I will get so far to see if the calculations are correct, as the proofs I calculated and formalized never end, I had to understand infinity first before I understood Gödel, and now I understand more why Ramanuja and Einstein have carnated, but as I have to realize the issue of light, envy and this whole Jesus stuff, generally speaking kriyas due to pain body etc. 

Also just by having calculated some proofs I see the issue of loving infinity as it's endless but if you're not in eternity it's not endless, and I can't enter bardos etc. 

Anyhow, this is the current interconnection I am seeking, I am having troubles cleaning things up as stuff constantly breaks, and the hyper inflated narcissism and the lack of Truth, Soul etc. has been bothering me, especially the lack of travel experience, etc. depth by soul and what I perceive.

There are a lot of things Leo is correct about, but if I will see that in my lifetime No, I am glad I realized that 100% as I already intuited the 100% due to this Wilber patterning and my family has exact combinations with differentials, and exponential truths or not.

Hence, I highly doubt it I really like astrology and antorhosophy, but there is a lot of 19th century bias in there, but I got a lot of answer.
 

The entire issue is, we already figured out, I am very glad Japan is my chrone in that sense. But HF GL understanding me I am you. 

Even when I never ventured so far, let alone through some very basic calculations and patterns I have been good at I found calculations that give possible access to archetypal tendencies, and calculated some very basic profs with Fourier calculation and other matrices, as well as some advanced calculus and statistics, but I have to get back to the core understanding and formulations of that, to further transcend the mathematical gift and foresight I see, even without a proof, as coding & the entire time/space matrics is continously expanding and contracting, this is my meditative view on this. 

Most of my insights for mathematics came from nothing, but what he found in Lakshmi and Love is part of RAMANJUA IS ONLY LOVE AND FOR ME THE PURE INCARNATION OF LOVE, it is obvious it's Lakshmi... but to view this with my german mind and the whole issue of WWI being played out in our current timeline is crazy, how little I was educated, due to the excess industrial age, and that I was ONLY the arrival of the global civilization that unraveled through time space reality

The whole issue of reason, as not been transcended into the core essence of "Vernunft", especially due to the reasoning of the current law makers, anti-integration of Ken Wilber and the level of misinterpretations as they lack LIFETIMES I AM SERIOUS LIFETIMES of understanding that man, and I am glad a few % due, even as 7's my clown of the enneagram, partially eventually also the incarnation of Lucifer, idk how deeply I can get into esoteric, if darkness disappears, it also my sensorical giftedness and having to expand on gifts, as the west is stuck on ideation and parameterization and generalization ideally IF YOU READ The Dwagon Dwagon Dwagon... Wagon Wagon... what a joke... if zen is pure essence of nature mystecism. 

From my archetypal blueprint I charted close to 1k people currently I am very different and I compared myself with Millionairs, Billionairs... I am very glad I realized how dumb my professors are if they can't get into current level of topology etc. and what someone like Ramanuja calculated for A.I computer science, infinity and FOURIER MY BAD ASS MOTHERFUCKER I hate it that they don't like him, but understanding him omfg. 

I'd love to talk humours bull, but god that guy had to dodge cleopatra, I hope my archetypal work is good for Wikipedia, if the Grokians arrive omfg, mostly I craved infinity, annihilation and I hope I can create my art studio and work with stuff. 

I also realized my issue and gifts more in mathematics, I am more like Gödel and less like a formulator 62 with details, but my energy is very high in these areas and moves downwards, generally my incarnation of what I charted in every calculator is very high, the core issue is humanity has been corrupt ever since I was born, and I wear that birth mark, I wonder if people would ever realize what reality is if they have not been born with any defects, most of my issues stem from Warfare, and there have been War Saints etc. the entire story of Thesalonik and art also makes me very sad, but that melancholy from ahrimanic spirit is also very interesting, I wish I would be at Heidelberg again.... 

I love it how vast the universe is, but unironically it's not vast enough, as nothing ever has been deserted... abrahamic religion what a crazy love story. 

Edited 34 minutes ago by KosmicGeng

[KosmicGeng]

We wont even get actual transhumanism till this guy does not carnate, but we have never been aryans idk what is worse realizing parts of Steiner is right or that he is a little yin-wood snakely, idk what is funnier from daoism. 

Edited 32 minutes ago by KosmicGeng

[KosmicGeng]

This is also very interesting, I've been craving my archetypal incarnation of science, and I figured out a TOE for me, but I still have to TOE the TOE of Ken Wilber, and buy the books or go through the references on a weekend, generally, I could not build my own industry, due to the issues I see, I contemplate very deeply.

The first thing is, our universe is so beautiful if anyone would just understand Einstein, I am very happy that guy was archetype my best friend my whole life as, if bullshit never had holism, I'd wonder what purification is, as well as solid eternity... 

Edited 17 minutes ago by KosmicGeng