Joining a Youth Community Living Project Pro's & Cons

[LoneWonderer]

*Edit, I meant to place this is the life purpose and career subforum please if a mod could move it I'd be thankful.

Hey everyone I'm looking for any advice or Insights you are willing to offer.

So for context I am currently living in an awesome country doing a pretty awesome job in the field I studied. In many ways my life is stable and to anyone who would see my life from outside I'm doing ok for myself. However the problem is I have increasingly become dissatisfied and disillusioned with my lifestyle. For one I am very introverted and I work in a solo job in nature conservation. This is a double edged sword because in a sense I don't have to deal with anyone's bullshit most of the time but I am slowly more and more atrophying my social skills (That were always very poor to begin with). Secondly I am too comfortable and am not pushing or challenging myself in areas I know I need to grow and isolation helps me not have to face that fear of the unkown. Thirdly I have had some ongoing issues with the on site staff that live there full time. Manipulation, intimidation, control issues I've been dealing for past two years and so after having gone above and beyond to point these issues out I'm considering leaving and finding greener pastures elsewhere. Fourth and lastly I'm in the camp of people who studied a degree and have quickly figured out it's not my passion really what I am doing. I want to live a more authentic experience and offer my time and help authentically to others.

My plan is to make the move by the end of this year. I have financial goals I want to hit (save up around 12,000 euros) beforehand. In about 3-4 months I will start looking for work more aligned with social community aspects such as working with voluteers and combining this as well with nature conservation which is what my degree is in. I already have a few previous contacts that could offer me more social oriented role opportunities back in Europe.

However I do think that I could dedicate some months beforehand to taking on more difficult (but ultimatly fun and personal growth oriented) social volunteering projects. I am interested in the idea of diving headfirst into a youth community that live, work, spend time toghether. I know of many such projects in Europe and it would be a question of sending out a few emails. The positives and negatives:

Positives:

Get out of your comfort zone big time (especially as a very introverted guy) and practice social skills. Find some sense of community. Opportunites to get laid. Opportunities to learn from others and build friendships. Opportunity to learn new uselful skills for future employment.

Negatives:

Huge groupthink traps. Huge chance I won't get along with them due to differing world views (when everyone you interact with has an issue with you it usually means it's not them it's YOU). This has been my experience in the past. Another possible negative is I am 27 years old and am wondering if I'm getting too old for this shit. 

So why don't you just find community in your current area and volunteer on weekends or something?

several reasons. I live in a very rural area. All local activities are things deeply unpassionate about such as Rugby, fishing. Being rural, activites are all pretty far away and there are very few young people in my area (most young'ns favourite pass time around here is hitting the bottle and smoking dope). And there are definetly no youth run projects in my area, I checked. closest one is 2h drive away and that's too far for me.

So why don't you just switch jobs and area in the same country?

This is not my home country. I have a work visa that limits me to work in this one company. If I move back to Europe I can go anywhere I want freely.

Why don't you just go out clubbing and meet young people like this?

You're asking too much of me here. I'd have a panic attack and die (not literally). But yes, no, I have my limits.

I guess one of my my biggest fears in all this is leaving security and stability I've built the past few years to seek something speculative but that would improve my life experience. I don't want to end up living back with my parents or relatives at 27/28 if things don't work out. I am pretty sure I will work it out and have a solid financial plan but the fear is always there.

 

I am open to all your advice and feedback on my plans. I may not answer your replies but I have read them. 

Edited 4 hours ago by LoneWonderer

[Someone here]

2 hours ago, LoneWonderer said:

However I do think that I could dedicate some months beforehand to taking on more difficult (but ultimatly fun and personal growth oriented) social volunteering projects. I am interested in the idea of diving headfirst into a youth community that live, work, spend time toghether. I know of many such projects in Europe and it would be a question of sending out a few emails. The positives and negatives:

Positives:

Get out of your comfort zone big time (especially as a very introverted guy) and practice social skills. Find some sense of community. Opportunites to get laid. Opportunities to learn from others and build friendships. Opportunity to learn new uselful skills for future employment.

Awesome. Do this .stepping out of your comfort zone and exposing yourself to new experiences is what grows you in life and makes your life more exciting. And you will thank yourself later on in life .
the negatives you mentioned are just excuses to stay in your comfort zone and not face the challenges that socializing with people who are not lookalikes in terms of personality and lifestyle you might present. And “too old “ ? lol you’re 27 . You were born yesterday.

 

[LoneWonderer]

1 hour ago, Someone here said:

Awesome. Do this .stepping out of your comfort zone and exposing yourself to new experiences is what grows you in life and makes your life more exciting. And you will thank yourself later on in life .
the negatives you mentioned are just excuses to stay in your comfort zone and not face the challenges that socializing with people who are not lookalikes in terms of personality and lifestyle you might present. And “too old “ ? lol you’re 27 . You were born yesterday.

 

@Someone here Thank you for your perspective. There is a few other things I forgot to mention as to why I'm hesitant. I feel a sense of guilt and failure at the idea of moving and changing my life at this stage in my late 20s. Like aren't these the years I'm supposed to be laying down roots? Working hard and saving up lots of money? I feel torn apart in this sense. If I stay in my current place I can definitely build the financial side, get residency, eventually buy a house or something. If I were to stay at this job I could probably over a period of 10-15 years become financially free.

But I know I'd be miserable on the job, not growing as a person and not advancing in life for the next 5-10 years. If I leave however, I'd throw away all that stability I've built but grow as a person. Back in Europe I may never make good money again but I'd most likely be a happier and more wholesome human. This is my dilemma. In my heart the decision to leave has already been made but now I'm afraid I'm running away from my responsibilities as an adult.

Edited 1 hour ago by LoneWonderer

[Someone here]

6 minutes ago, LoneWonderer said:

@Someone here Thank you for your perspective. There is a few other things I forgot to mention as to why I'm hesitant. I feel a sense of guilt and failure at the idea of moving and changing my life at this stage in my late 20s. Like aren't these the years I'm supposed to be laying down roots? Working hard and saving up lots of money? I feel torn apart in this sense. If I stay in my current place I can definitely build the financial side, get residency, eventually buy a house or something. If I were to stay at this job I could probably over a period of 10-15 years become financially free.

But I know I'd be miserable on the job, not growing as a person and not advancing in life for the next 5-10 years. If I leave however, I'd throw away all that stability I've built but grow as a person. Back in Europe I may never make good money again but I'd most likely be a happier and more wholesome human. This is my dilemma.

Then choose what matters the most to you .. comfort and money as soon as possible or gaining experience in life and having adventures. Ultimately you have to decide. If you can’t decide then talk to someone you trust and who has experience to guide you . If I was in your shoes I would stay in the job and get financial independence asap. I care about peace of mind and comfort more than getting better and achieving long term goals ..but that’s me ..not you .

[LoneWonderer]

11 minutes ago, Someone here said:

Then choose what matters the most to you .. comfort and money as soon as possible or gaining experience in life and having adventures. Ultimately you have to decide. If you can’t decide then talk to someone you trust and who has experience to guide you . If I was in your shoes I would stay in the job and get financial independence asap. I care about peace of mind and comfort more than getting better and achieving long term goals ..but that’s me ..not you .

This is why I want different people's perspectives on this. As for me, I don't really value long term stability as much as I probably should and there is this constant reminder in the back of my mind I'm not growing as a human being. Becoming better socially has much more value to me than numbers in my bank account. Finding love, companionship a meaningful reason for existence feels like a worthy pursuit. It also feels like magical thinking at times and disconnected from reality. Reality is if things were to not work out I'd have thrown away a good scheme I have going here. 

I can't see at this moment in time if the decision I'm contemplating undertaking is an immature one of someone trying to run away from responsability.

Edited 1 hour ago by LoneWonderer

[Someone here]

 

 

@LoneWonderer you might find value in these two episodes. 

[LoneWonderer]

2 minutes ago, Someone here said:

 

 

@LoneWonderer you might find value in these two episodes. 

Yeah thanks man. I've actually already watched both those episodes several times over before. Expose myself to more life experience is something I desperately need.

Edited 1 hour ago by LoneWonderer