Revisiting my old 5-MeO trip; effects on short term memory

[Pure Imagination]

Hey all.

I had a breakthrough, 30mg insufflated 5-MeO-DMT trip 8 years ago and just wanted to share my reflection on it now. First off, I just want to say that I am a neurodivergent person who has immense social anxiety; if you don't have those qualities, then maybe you won't relate to this experience. But I still think sharing it may be useful to you. Remembering it now, it was still the most profound, terrifying experience of my life; that much will be relatable to you if you have taken it haha. But at the same time, I don't regret it. It profoundly changed my perception, and I want to share this because I want to make it abundantly clear that yes, taking large doses of 5-MeO can change your perception forever.

I remember saying back then that I thought 5-MeO hindered or even degraded my short term memory. I think that's still true, but not in a way that was damaging or honestly, in a way most people should be fearful of. I was a spacey person before, who held multiple streams of thought at once in a conversation almost as a defense mechanism. 5-MeO completely destroyed that. It forced me to just stay in the moment and shoot from the hip in conversation, and that's honestly how most people talk anyway. I think it singlehandedly dismantled the neurotic pattern in me that thought I needed to hold so many single threads in a conversation at once to survive socially. I no longer think that's true. I just shoot from the hip with my intuition and it just works. I'm not sure if anyone reading this here can relate to this line of thinking, but I hope at least one can and I'm not alone here in how this profound substance changed me forever.

Like I said, I don't regret this experience at all. It was profoundly positive and still the biggest turning point in my whole life. I experienced God realization and ego death and more all at once, but coming back to human life, that all is almost a side point. A 5-MeO breakthrough specifically will rock your world in ways you could never imagine. I share this to say that 5-MeO has qualities that produce permanent awakening experiences that are rarely talked about, and not in ways that you would assume just through listening to spiritual teachings. It forces your ego into changes that feel like death and mental illness. You literally feel like you're dying when your way of interacting with other humans is just suddenly ripped away from you. That's not some small thing. When your personality changes overnight due to a serious psychological rewiring, that feels like death. Again, this is my own experience; I'm sure some people take this dose of 5-MeO and feel close to nothing.

I was holding onto and chewing on this for years now that I finally wanted to share and maybe someone out there could relate to in their own awakening journey. Maybe other psychedelics do too, but I know from my own experience that 5-MeO was the only one that had such lasting effects for me personally.

 

Let me know what you think. Have you taken a psychedelic where it changed your perception permanently in a way that was world shifting, yet in a way you can somehow articulate? Let me know, and always use psychedelics with intention and responsibility.

Edited Thursday at 12:39 PM by Pure Imagination

[Pure Imagination]

My old trip report

[OBEler]

@Pure Imagination wow what a report. Thanks for your writing I really can feel what happeed to you. 

I took a high dose of LSD 7 years ago and it changed my perception forever in terms that I see that there is nothing outside. So if I see a house I see that it's like in a video game, nothing behind. 

[Pure Imagination]

25 minutes ago, OBEler said:

@Pure Imagination wow what a report. Thanks for your writing I really can feel what happeed to you. 

I took a high dose of LSD 7 years ago and it changed my perception forever in terms that I see that there is nothing outside. So if I see a house I see that it's like in a video game, nothing behind. 

I love that. I had a huge creative awakening on LSD around the same time, but not quite the one I'm talking about here. I'm talking about a huge rewiring that affected how I interact socially. That's mostly why I think this 5-MeO experience was so terrifying, because it shifted my ego and personality in how I approach others, in a way that's more instinctive and single-track minded. Both are valid and useful, but perception changes and creativity epiphanies can only get you so far in this work if you think you're still sane in the minds of others haha

[OBEler]

@Pure Imagination what you describe sounds 5 Meo showed you how it should be normally. I think for a normal person this would not be so terrifying. But I can understand that this kind of interaction was unusual to you.