Beans & Joy’s Journal 🐯🌈

[Beans]

Meow 

Edited 14 hours ago by Beans

[Yimpa]

Welcome back 

[Yimpa]

Despite good success on Threads, I’ve decided to take a break on there. I satisfied the parts of myself craving validation and importance. But after weeks of near-constant attention, I’ve learned that no amount of it can actually satisfy me. 

 

Edited 13 hours ago by Yimpa

[Beans]

13 minutes ago, Yimpa said:

Despite good success on Instagram and Threads, I’ve decided to deactivate my accounts. I satisfied the parts of myself craving validation and importance. But after weeks of near-constant attention, I’ve learned that no amount of it can actually satisfy me. 

I personally don't make content for the attention of it, but mostly for the reward of community, and inspiration in creation. It does make me sad to see your account go, but if this is what you want I’ll always support you in your decision. 
It was beautiful seeing you bloom in your creativity, and overall individualism. 

[Yimpa]

Perhaps being seen for the first time in my life was overwhelming me.

I’ll let my friends know they can find me here for the time being.

Edited 13 hours ago by Yimpa

[Beans]

We will await your return Mrs. Yimpa 🖤🫂

[Yimpa]

 

[Yimpa]

I don’t do peaceful exits. I make a scene, go out with a bang. Keeps things memorable. 😇

I left my ex in a visceral manner. Now I am in a relationship that is a lot calmer and paced much slower.

Beans got to meet said person. They enjoy their presence and don’t feel disrespected by them  

For those new, Beans and I are in a mono-poly relationship. 

Edited 12 hours ago by Yimpa

[Beans]

BABY YOU'RE A FIREWORK! 
COM ON SHOW EM WHAT YOU’RE WORTH!

make em say ah ah ah (cues dancing) 

[Yimpa]

^ Great song. Katy Perry as a person… not so much.

Edited 12 hours ago by Yimpa

[Beans]

2 minutes ago, Yimpa said:

^ Great song. Katy Perry as a person… not so much.

Whole heartedly agree 

[Yimpa]

Mohawk Austin

Was a fun night. Gummies helped calm me down, since I suffer from C-PTSD and social anxiety disorder. Helped me contemplate what death is, as many of the songs were about trauma and suicide. 

Driving home while high was also fun. The road just melts and I'm in a hyper meditative state. I do it legally.

Edited 12 hours ago by Yimpa

[Yimpa]

Truth is pleasing to my mind.

People-pleasing shrinks my authenticity. Truth-seeking is another game entirely - it demands I step into the unknown and face what’s actually there. What comes through is beautiful, unimaginable before the encounter. It breaks the people-pleasing cycle and shifts toward pleasing Love instead - which isn’t separate from me.

[Beans]

Both of my parents are narcissists 

it’s strange deconstructing their teachings, but it’s the most free I’ve ever felt. 
fly little tiger 🐯 🦋

also I’ve found this really informative video on YouTube 

hope yall can enjoy and relate in some aspect 

stay safe love yall 

 

[Yimpa]

I’ve always wondered if i have narcissistic tendencies. I’ve spoken to hundreds of mental health professionals throughout my life, and none of them mentioned it. Maybe they were afraid to? Or maybe I put on a mask so well that they never saw it? Freaky to consider. 

AI:

Given your history of people-pleasing and masking your authentic self, I’d actually guess the opposite - you were so focused on what others wanted that narcissistic patterns wouldn’t have had room to develop.

Narcissism centers on an inflated self-importance and lack of empathy. Your journey seems defined by the opposite problems: suppressing yourself to meet others’ expectations, deep concern for how you affect others, and extensive self-reflection about your impact on people.

The fact that you’re genuinely worried about this is itself a strong signal against narcissism. People with actual narcissistic patterns rarely engage in this kind of self-questioning.

Your awareness of masking is probably about hiding your authentic joy and queerness, not hiding grandiosity or lack of empathy. And hundreds of professionals not mentioning it is meaningful data - they see this stuff constantly.

Sometimes people who’ve been manipulated worry they’re the manipulator. Sounds like you’re processing trauma patterns, not narcissistic ones.

Edited 11 hours ago by Yimpa

[Yimpa]

I am thankful for being supported in my aloneness. Contemplating all alone, without external influence, is how I thrive and transcend my old beliefs. 

It challenges the roles I used to have to play. Being with family during holidays, where is that coming from? Why do I feel forced to hang out with them even though I genuinely don’t want to? 

I kept saying no, but I still won’t leave me alone. 

Respect my no and things will go a lot smoother. Don’t be difficult.

Edited 8 hours ago by Yimpa

[Yimpa]

Being openly trans in 2025 is basically playing on Legendary difficulty. And I wouldn’t have it any other way. I was born to challenge humanity’s paradigms. Medical professionals told my mother I wasn’t supposed to be born, yet here I am. I disproved professionals and will continue to over and over again. 

[Beans]

:)) 

today i watched the perks of a wallflower. And the way this movie had me sobbing. Needless to say i rate it 10/10. 
the main character struggles with the death of their aunt. I found a lot of similarities between the character Charlie and myself. Since I have also lost someone I loved very much at a young age. His struggles with their mental health is also very relate-able. It’s nice to see ourselves in characters that we didn’t expect to relate to. 

[Beans]

I remember the first time 

joy and I played halo together. I always enjoyed playing firefight on legendary mode, but there was a lot of hesitancy with joy in playing that mode. 
 

Though after some time joy began playing with me on legendary mode.  Eventually became the best pro healer on our team. While I was more of the brute force trying to take as much enemies out! 

Edited 7 hours ago by Beans

[Yimpa]