Finished the LP course

[Jannes]

I miss having a belly laugh about myself. 

[Jannes]

Just had a dream. 

I was walking with my father and my sister somewhere, we wanted to get our car and drive home. But it looked like some kind of explosion of fire happened there recently. It looked increasingly dangerous and then we hire another explosion and something like gunfire. We turn around and want to run but my sister seems paralyzed. I speak to her very calmy:  "[name of my sister] run." So this reaches her unconscious and she starts running. And I feel so great that I just managed to do that. We reach a safer zone soon after and thats about where the dream ends. 

[Jannes]

Not sure if I wrote it in my blog already but I had a nice talk with my dad about my internship which I am clueless about. But then we found that I had an internship way back in special needs education which I really enjoyed on many levels. Holy shit, I need to try that, or something similiar out again. Maybe its even possible to do similiar work with the education which I have already. A path forward! 

[Jannes]

I have had the thought before that humans may be striving for some sort of chaos because thats what their psyche needs. A super orderly and perfect world isnt acceptable because things like struggle and war are needed elements for the human experience. 

I recently got that exact same intuition reflected somewhere else. 

Its just speculation but it originates somewhere. I think this is something that could be discovered in a few centuries and then be common knowledge. But because humanity might have peaked in the 2000s, its time to experience humans fucking up/ manifesting that inner strive for a balance of peace and chaos.