Aquarius

@aurum Obviously.

@ZZZZ Yes it was! I'm a fragile being! But thanks for compassion, I really needed to hear that. That man looked like 60 years old, I didn't care about sex omg I wanted to make a fragile human being happier and teach him techniques because that's my life purpose, to share love and teach love. I didn't want anything in return, but I didn't want to be emotionally abused either. I told him I'm not looking for a partner, I just wanted to talk openly with someone about who I really am without anyone going non-dual or Freud on me like on more intellectual forums. (which is cool and I still love it but sometimes I need to connect with everyday people too).

@Manjushri Thanks.. <3 I didn't do it cause of neediness, I just wanted connection with someone. Not sexual connection, but arational/intellectual one. It's so rare these days.

If you get enlightened you get more than money. But you also get the money. Enlightenment is just a tool, not the destination. Dumb brain-teasers like these make no sense because they are not how life works. You can find a middle ground in everything. Let us not be childish and naive, or ignorant.

Haha, do I seek it?

Enlightenment. Because then you have both + at least 1 billion more things in all aspects of life. Constant flow of abundance.

Find purpose. Have a vision. Ego is not to play cards with. Surrender to ego. Let it go, then it won't bother you anymore. (counter-intuitive, but effective) You are not God. God moves through you, God creates through you. Stop identifying with archetypes. Be authentic. Don't repress: allow. Panic is fear of fear. Trust yourself. You are the only person that can be trusted by yourself. Once you trust yourself, the world is yours. (not literally, but in a non-attached way) Heart and mind are one. Purify intentions. Enjoy life, remember that you are human. Everything is very fine with you and you are going through a natural process. You are not a thought, you are a human aspect of reality experiencing thoughts. See beauty in everything. Even in "evil". Give yourself what you need, so that later on you can give it back to society a thousandfold. Feel free to express "negative" emotions such as anger, sadness, pain, melancholy, loneliness, lust, hunger... Those are healthy reactions. When you feel alone, connect with someone. I am here for you. Edit: Oh sorry, I was replying to your first post on the thread. I see you are feeling very good now. Awesome!

Root - connected to - Solar Sacral - connected to - Throat Heart - connected to - Third eye Crown overflowing with bliss. This is my way of Being. I wasn't using my root chakra, I was a doormat. I hated myself not others and it was unhealthy. It's all over now. I was in constant fear and I was abused by everyone because my family is toxic. I was letting everyone use me because I did not care about myself, I wanted to see everyone being happy even if I suffered. My root chakra is my most active chakra right now and I'm sharing love and compassion with everyone and im super grounded. Also please don't analyze my profile pic, that's an old picture. I lost all my other pictures because my phone exploded in my hands. I thought it was me creating a poltergeist because all this extreme kundalini, but then I realized it was just too old. Meh, happens all the time. We tend to use things until they explode. Extremely green. I'm buying myself a nokia potato lol. Also, there are more than 7 chakras, so don't get stuck into that model. I can create an orgasm on any point of the body for example because there are thousands of points you can touch. This world needs so much healing, stop making assumptions please because that's hurtful... The strong attention is because I'm about 180cm tall and being a girl that's unusual for some (most girls here being 165cm). Also I'm quite muscular and curvy. Right now no one dares to look at me because they are not ready for my unconditional love. If they do, they do it with love and desire. I have no idea what I've done. I just started accepting and loving myself and respecting everyone unconditionally. I kept telling myself that I deserve good things. I prayed to God. I assume people like authenticity and confidence and that's the shift I'm experiencing. I love my life. I accidentally made a cute cashier blush and I was like wtf is life real??? lol. I'm just letting the Tao flow through me, i dont care about chakras and all that spiritual stuff. I had to mature, that was the problem. Read my journal to understand my maturization process. Thank you. Namaste!

I can't talk to my father, I can't talk to some of my friends without this happening, when I meet someone new they are pissed off. Sometimes even strangers on the street are looking very angrily at me, sometimes even stare. I just say something and people don't reply. They make an irritated sigh or noise sometimes. Or they ignore me and I feel the pressure between us. Why do some people do this? I cannot be natural around my loved ones anymore. I cannot say what I want or feel. I started to be scared to express my emotions and wants and needs. It created a deep fear of initiating conversations.

Both suffering and pain and optional. You can have pain without suffering though.

I know I may not have the best singing skills, but this is a song/poem someone wrote me about 8 years ago and I felt like sharing a message. They lost their song recording and the lyrics too but I have a good memory and improvisation skills, plus I had the lyrics written down. My English isn't the best either so apologies for any mispronounces. Enjoy?? omigosh im so vulnerable. o3o

My eyes never lie. I have mood-color eyes.

I love you guys unconditionally, even if you hate me for no reason. If you guys think I can read your mind or that I care about any opinions about my authentic self, you are deluded. If I was ever acting shady, it was because of self esteem/people pleasing problems and naive nature, and most of you only made it worse. I am completely healed right now, and I'm a healer myself already. How does knowing this make you guys feel? Edit: I took 100% responsibility for my life right now, I'm only pointing out to something here/expressing hurt. Being enlightened doesn't mean being a desensitized robot.

The oxes are just a model. The spiral is just a model. Astrology is just a divinatory practice. The greatest evil you can do to humanity is to abuse and harm yourself.

You seem to be in an ego trap. Enlightenment is not what you think.

Watch every video of Leo and integrate everything. Buy his book list and life purpose course. (recommended) Become a spiral wizard. Know yourself. Don't play cards with the Devil (ego). Surrender and have mercy. Hallucinations are an illusion. (subconscious projection of archetype mechanisms) Use subliminals. Actually no. Make them yourself or ask a trusted individual to create them for you. Also use affirmations. Become arational and become a shaman. Use rational (mathematical) mind to sustain and develop arational mind (imagination). (Hemi-sync, but do it without subliminals). Learn to communicate with animals, plants, crystals and ectoplasms. It's fine to ask for help. Chant Mantras or pray to God. Align with the astrals (planets, sun, moon...). Let the Tao flow through you. Meditate using healing mandalas. Dance a lot. Love your Self more than anyone else. Serve society. The system is good. Without it it's anarchy. Lead like a Coral would. Serve, but don't be a slave. When you offer advice read everything someone says before offering advice. Offer what people ask for, not what you think they need. Remember that everything someone says is just an opinion, don't take anything personally and don't get butthurt.

If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best. If you're putting chains on me, I'm gonna break both the chains and you. I'm serving the system, not any single one frustrated individual, whoever that may be. I do what God wants me to do because I'm a good Christian. Namaste. “Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power.” ― Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

I did exactly this and it worked. Thanks.

@electroBeam Yeah I did exactly this and and got everyone attacking me. I needed lots of courage and thick skin to become a leader. Now no one dares to even look me in the eyes. I am intimidating. I cleared my karma and attained Dharmamega and grounded into it. Thanks everyone for your help. Especially thanks to @Elysian .

Not believing in yourself when no one is next to you and everyone thinks you are deluded and psychotic or evil.

I fink u freeky n i like u a lot my ugly boi so ruff n tuff he dont care bout anything but me The drawing is symbolic not to be taken literally. Lyrics (c) Die Antwoord Art (c) Aquarius

Yeah you're right. Felt good to get it off my chest. Felt bad getting attacked for who I really am (I mean who I really was back then, life changes). Now I've become everything that I listed and more, and I don't even want a man anymore. I just wanna serve humanity. If a man wants me he can have me, but no sex for me because I'm too fertile. Men seem to enjoy my tantric massages and hugs though. *thinking emoji*

The ego doesn't die when you get enlightened. It keeps your body alive. It just becomes dormant and functions in the background. Ego is not evil, it just... exists. Heal your ego before you let go of it. It ain't going anywhere because it's a construct of the mind-body.

You don't kill your inner child, you play with him. And its personality trait is not a weakness, it's a superpower. You're highly sensitive and that's the biggest gift one can have. Polish that diamond!

@non_nothing :) it's true. you're cute.