lmfao

@Leo Gura I've heard great things about EEG Neurofeedback on this forum, something I should look into. Thanks.

The two conditions put in the title of this thread were specifically mentioned by me since I think I have both of them, to whatever various degrees. I know that regardless of whatever the fact of the matter is in regards to what can be done about these conditions I should accept myself and move forward with what I want in life and be happy. But I ask this question regardless. The biggest source of frustration to me recently has been dyslexia and adhd because I feel those to be directly affecting me in my studies. Being slow at reading and having sub-par comprehension in combination with being distractible isn't a pleasant combination when I want to get something I find meaningful done. Because ideally I'd be doing a shit tonne of reading of mathematics and science since I enjoy that but reading just a few paragraphs of anything feels like a strenuous chore. I'm just typing this because I know that as far as mainstream medicine has developed, there is nothing which can be done about these conditions besides getting some sort of therapy to cope with these problems. Maybe I have to just accept it. I know that meditation improves my focus and concentration overall which is obviously a bonus. What triggered me to type this is the fact that I've become acutely aware of the fact that I can barely read a small article or something without feeling large amounts of mental exhaustion and irritability.

@Anton Rogachevski yeah detaching from results is the best thing to do. Good advice. @Leo Gura I liked your analogy of just inspecting it. Awareness isn't something that can be forced out of neurosis. The paradox of self development. @Mu_ Suffering and addiction. I'm just trying to generate some positive emotion as well. hmmmmm good point. Nah I probably haven't seen much.

@EternalForest Non-duality can be framed logically. We could define reality to just be everything that is present and happening right now. Everything right now that is occurring is occurring in one consciousness. For "you" right now, everything is happening in one consciousness. Other people are simply forms within your consciousness. It should be an obvious fact that everything is occurring in one consciousness, but alas here we are suffering and etc. I don't see the point in statements like "there are an infinite number of realities". That sort of take on things doesn't interest me in terms of consciousness work, because for the sake of consciousness work I see this as a concept. It's the sort of thing I would be interested in at a philosophical/scientific level. I've seen Leo for example to state that he "knows" (I'm straw manning Leo here but I can't think of a better word) that his true self will live forever, and that he knows the he's experienced reality as a dinosaur and that he has and will experience reality in an infinite number of forms. To clarify how Leo phrases it, it isn't the egoic self that lives forever and takes on infinite forms. It's God that lives "forever"(Mu, the void, brahman, Allah, Godhead, whatever name you use). But to be honest, I'm very averse to thinking of things that way. One thought which crosses my mind is that the assertion that you have and will experience all uncountable forms induces the notion of time. But what if time and at an even deeper level the existence of flux, perception, events itself is an "illusion". What does it mean to say "I will experience reality as a Spiderman". Where is this idea coming from? Reality is just: Shouldn't that be enough?

@ActualizedDavid The Book of Not Knowing Kriya Secrets Revealed These are two books which people might recommend to you on this forum regards to consciousness work. I've read part of the The Book of Not Knowing, its really good. But it also sounds like you might also be looking for more self actualisation centred books.

@Charlotte Yeah you're pretty much completely right there. The difference between having monkey mind and not having as strong a degree of monkey mind is like night and day for me. I can feel "adhd" like symptoms of to be significantly relieved after meditating. Even if the effects are temporary I'd like to think that the presence of positive effects in the first palace is an indicator of what could be permanently possible. About procrastination. Like today my mind was ruminating non-stop about a deadline. But after meditation, I realised that my mind is just getting in its own way. I feel as though meditation makes me jump the gun less in all the decisions I make throughout the day. I've been inconsistent with my habit of meditation which is something I can mend.

@Leo GuraIf astrology is low in your priority list for main channel videos then perhaps you could make a post on your blog about it? I'd like to see you try and make me stop being a dogmatic materialist Jokes aside, I would be pleasantly surprised if there was something of worth to "the study of the movements and relative positions of celestial objects as a means of divining information about human affairs and terrestrial events."

@Charlotte I wouldn't say I read often. I do little bits of reading here and there if I'm in a university lecture, or if I'm reading English subtitles for shows I watch regularly. I'm lazy and so I don't put a lot of effort into studying and the sort and so I procrastinate till the last minute. @Marc Schinkel I just googled that guys name, it seems he's written a book on the topic. I'll look into it probably. @pixelwave Yeah the problem I have is that I'm unconscientious. If this were not the case I'd have organised myself better to deal with it all better. But even so the whole thing is frustrating lol.

@tecladocasio Leo is using words and concepts, but what else can he do? Leo is one to always say that God is beyond concepts and words. Words are like a finger pointing at the moon. “I am a finger pointing to the moon. Don’t look at me; look at the moon.” But yeah I can see why you pointed this out.

@moon777light Religions are simply a subset of a ideologies, the way I see it. I cant be bothered to research enough into the semantics of how you define religion neither can I be bothered to research (read some shit cuz im lazy) into what liberalism exactly is so as to say whether liberalism is a religion but I'd be pretty confident in saying liberalism is an ideology and also a religion if what you typed was right. Yep pretty much. In regards to the last paragraph, all of us have unhealthy expressions and healthy expressions of each stage. You could probably say that the degree to which someone is "ideological" in their thoughts, beliefs, actions and behaviour is purely a function of "ego". Even if a person isn't subscribed overtly to an external ideology which someone has written in a book (like various religions, political beliefs, philosophical beliefs, metaphysical beliefs and etc which are written in books and given various names like "christianity" or "liberalism" for example) they will still exhibit the same patterns of thoughts and action of someone who does formally believe in some ideology. We all make assumptions, have skewed perceptions, examine the contents of our conciseness with a lens which wishes to confirm what we already think we know and etc. It's kinda of like how Leo said that despite the fact that not many things can be 100% classified as a cult, there are an extremely number of things which have cult dynamics. We all have ideological thinking, even if I profess myself to have non. I'm inclined to just simplify things and say that "ego" is the root of ideological thinking (since you can probably build extensive models of "ego" which confirm this idea if you were interested enough to do it, which someone like Leo probably is). Part of the reason I'm typing all of this is because your last paragraph made me think about how ideological thinking caries across the different stages in SD and I've gone off on a tangent. There is more to be said about Ideological thinking which isn't sufficiently described by just mentioning stage blue (ofc I know you weren't implying the converse to what I just said in this sentence). The set of all possible patterns of thinking which arise in a particular stage will on average contain "less" ego (I'm treating ego like its something which can be quantified in this sentence) than the average amount of ego found in the set of all possible patterns of thinking in the adjacently below stage. Maybe.

Yeah sports probably is one of the best ways to do shadow work.

I find these tracks inspirational, with the third one firing me up, because of the emotional associations I formed with them due to the shows they are in. I remember Durarara giving me a feeling of sonder. Y'all have trash taste in music, smh.

@ValiantSalvatore I'm quite familiar with the Big 5 traits. I haven't read that book lol. I didn't know that information about the interaction between extraversion and conscientiousness, it makes sense to me though lol. I don't know if introverts are more verbose. Being verbose but being a worse problem solver reminds me of myself. In MBTI I think this might correspond to the N vs S dichotomy, or in the big 5 it could correspond to high vs low openness to experience. "anger is an energy that wants to move forward" yeah. Although I don't necessarily believe in it fully you can take a SD perspective on it. Stage Red wishes to further itself and get things accomplished with an intense single minded passion. Stage Red when healthily integrated will instils inside you a desire for individuation and chasing what you want. I like what you said about owning your anger. Don't be afraid of it, it's a part of nature. Although, I might be a hypocrite since I have not got anger controlled for myself I'm instead just talking from a few experiences I've felt anger to be a force for "good" in my life. I've taken the approach of using anger as a tool for action and I have a mixed bag of results to be honest. Acting impulsively on anger for me can be an easy way to become egotistical and just have a lower consciousness overall, but on the other hand I don't want to repress it. I haven't read that book. When I care about what other people think of me, it's a function of raw anxiety and partially fear for me. I know that for me I probably wouldn't find that book helpful for that purpose. Social intelligence is always good though, I'm sure the book would be useful for me somehow. You might like the book thick face black heart. I haven't read it all but it seems good. Wasn't my cup of tea fully because I felt it to be repeating itself, but good nonetheless.

@ValiantSalvatore I myself can have a lot of pent up anger as well, so I can relate. I'm also quite introverted. I see myself as a nice guy, but I can have a low fuse for certain things which trigger me. Are you asking for advice in regards to your anger as well as advice on being more open and vulnerable with people? ( I believe you're trying to say that your interactions with people lead to pent up anger?). Introversion is an interesting thing. The way I see it, there does exist a large natural variation in people's temperaments in regards to introversion and extraversion. However I know that for myself my introverted traits are partially a function of low consciousness and neurosis. The willingness to open up to other people and the willingness to be authentic are usually the same thing (at least for me), and in many situations someone who's not willing to open up or express themselves is acting upon neurosis imo (unless they have some tangible motive for not doing so). Not being willing to open up is often attributed to introversion. I still think that introversion/extraversion is natural. Some people like to talk and socialise loads, other not so much. I'm usually quite the introverted dull person, but I was to meet someone new today they might get the impression that I'm an extraverted and jolly . I've found that for myself when I'm in a higher consciousness state and am less neurotic I'm naturally more extraverted. However, socialising still tires me out. It's weird, because I partially want to socialise but it feels like a drain for me and to a large degree that can be due to my natural temperament. However when looking at the general case for different people and different situations, I think being drained from socialising isn't solely a function of "introversion"(im using quotation marks because the word introversion is hard to precisely define and the definition can be somewhat subjective). If you force an extravert into social situations where the topic of conversation is boring for them, they will get drained. Part of the reason I get drained from social situation is because most of the social situations I find myself in are just extremely boring for me at times. Maybe this is true for you? I think I possibly have "ADHD" so I just get drained from things I find boring. After reading what you write, it sounds like you need give less of a fuck in general. I can't say I've integrated this for myself, but just be yourself and pay little regard for the consequences. I know that for myself, the more assertively I act the less angry I feel. That's because my mind isn't fighting with itself neurotically about what I should do in certain situations. I try to act on instinct, mindfully with little filtering if possible. It's about trying to act in the spirit of what is often called "Wu Wei" for me. Action in the spirit of non-action. Being vulnerable will lead to you having more power and control over certain situations. I have anxiety problems and that leads to me not being open and vulnerable, as you put it. Maybe you feel fear and anxiety about what other people will think/do if you say/do certain things?

Randomly rewatched this video after months. Really straightfoward and high quality imo. I like how he immediately says that a lecture on zen is something of the nature of a hoax at the beginning of the lecture. After watching much of his content, I think Alan Watts is very good at trying to get you to see the difference between the map and the territory. He talks articulately on the limits of language, conceptualising and thinking.

@Wyatt this is the clearest explanation I've found online for what a sociopath is https://www.quora.com/What-exactly-is-the-definition-of-a-sociopath/answer/Corey-Reaux-Savonte-1 Like @Equanimitize said be careful about the labels you point on people. Someone who commits heinous crimes isn't automatically a sociopath. Low empathy or ruthlessness doesn't make you a sociopath automatically. Make sure you aren't overusing the term Sociopathy in your explanations of the world. 1) Sociopathy is triggered by environmental circumstances (and perhaps 1 or 2 "bad" genes which make you more susceptible to becoming one), which is one of the differentiaters of it from psychopathy. Psychopaths will often not feel strong emotions in regard to sadness, anxiety or loneliness (although they can feel fear) meanwhile sociopaths can. Psychopaths are mostly born the way they are imo. Perhaps there can exist a complex overlap of psychopathy and Sociopathy in a person, which starts to blurs the boundary between these two things. This boundary can be blurred in two senses. One sense is in how we choose to define these two things and and it can also be blurred in how we can observe someone externally and be able to tell the difference. However the existence of these two different categories is not arbitrary if you look at extreme cases within each category. From a scientific perspective, personality is all about the brain so yes Sociopathy is a consequence of the state of a persons brain. The brain is nowhere near being fully understood in science, so in what exact ways the brain of a sociopath is different from a normal person who knows. There does exist some research on this. 2) Probably. Sociopaths have different characteristics from "normal" people, so looking at Sociopathy will allow you to see how the ego will function even when you change a few variables and you can then perhaps start to build an abstract/generalised image of what ego is despite the many forms it takes in different people and in different situation. 3) People who are too nice and push overs are more easily manipulated. If you're good at reading people you're less likely to fall for manipulation. Someone who has healthily integrated their shadow side and aggression can stand up for themselves and will paradoxically enough be in less situations where they have to be aggressive.

@George Fil some of the people with whom I have very close relationships with, family members, can be very boring to talk to. Anytime a discussion point about politics, philosophy or society comes up in conversation they just constantly have a black and white lens from which to view things. There's nothing fun or nuanced about a moraliser who can't see shades of gray. There's always the label of what's good or what's bad present. I have one family member who will always say that "out of principle" such and such is right/wrong. Very absolutist ways of looking at the world. People who don't see relativity or subjectivity bore the hell out of me.

I was watching this Sadhguru video randomly, where he talks about people's search for purpose and meaninglessness. He says that whilst the idea that there is an absolute meaning to life is delusion and leads to madness , be careful that you don't excessively dismantle your psyche when you're not prepared. What this means for me is that I can't only meditate for self-development, I have to be doing many other things as well. There's a good reason ego exists, for self preservation. You want to be stable enough to the point where even without your psychological structure you can live in the present moment.

@ShugendoRa why must you demonise the part of you that demnises?

@EvilAngel Using this version of Maslows hierarchy posted on this forum a while ago, I think that it takes someone advanced to truly evolve past the need for companionship. But if companionship isn't available to you, why become miserable due to it? Just get what good company you can, and if you cant just accept whatever your situation may be in.

At the deepest level, why does it matter which option you chose? If you're trying to train your mindfullness skills then focusing your awareness on unfamiliar/uncomfortable sensations might do you some good.

@Manjushri go to a psychiatrist and psychologist man. I've been really suicidal before as well, to the point where I've frantically researches for hours on the Internet how to kill myself. I've been on antidepressants for over a year now. You said that medical professionals in Serbia aren't great, but I would assume that they are compotent enough to have basic psychiatrists who give you the correct antidepressant. When I was THAT low I absolutely needed antidepressants and I'm thankful for them. I know people on this forum give antidepressants a bad rep but honestly they are needed sometimes. Anyone who has gotten themselves lost truly deep into the pits of suffering and sadness recognises this. I remember just having the words "I want to kill myself" repeated to myself over and over in my mind in an out of control neurotic frenzy. If you're looking for motivation, put a positive spin on the phrase "I want to kill myself". You can forget killing your ego or whatever, I tried to spin that phrase into "I want to change myself". When I was low, at least some self actualization must come before super serious self transcendence work.

+1

@Amun From the perspective of the ethical standards that I operate from in most situations eating meat is unjustifiable and evil. However, I am a hypocrite and am comfortable being one because meat tastes good. I am discriminatory towards the suffering of animals, just because they are less intelligent and I can shut down the empathy I feel for them. I wonder if future generations of humans will look down upon our generation of meat eaters the same way that this current generation of humans looks down on past civilisations for the evils of human slavery and other things. One thing I'm curious about is what is the quality of consciousness of an animal. What would it feel like to be an animal, I wonder. Im not a biologist but I wonder if for instance, a newly born human infant and an animal in a slaughter house maybe have similar levels of intelligence and emotional depth to their experience. And if a a newly born human infant is comparable to an animal, why is killing one acceptable whilst the killing the other is not? (PS I am not advocating that you kill babies btw.........)

@Enlightened @Enlightened characteristics I aspire to become? Hmmmmm good question. I aspire to become someone who is low in neuroticism. I aspire also aspire to become someone who doesn't have addiction problems. I also aspire to be someone who reads and exercises a lot. Those are probably the main things. What do you think?