Harry Howard

Any tips for getting dates during a pandemic? I am lonely and constantly yearning for a girl in my life but don’t have one. I am in a college town with lots of young women walking around, so I suppose I should be doing cold approaches. The bars are all socially distanced and I very rarely get invited to parties. My big concern is that I am (mostly) introverted, and I don’t have a big social circle (which is why I rarely have parties I can go to). My concern is that I don’t have enough friends to be seen as socially valuable by a quality woman, that I’ll be seen as an weird loner. I am wondering, is having just a few friends truly unattractive, and will it make it harder to get a girlfriend? Or is that just a limiting belief that I need to overcome?

I'm wondering about what the journey of moving up to stage turquoise would look like. Leo and most spiral dynamics sources say that this can only be done by moving up the spiral by passing through each stage - spending a lot of time at stage orange, green, and stage yellow - before you can get to stage turquoise. This makes sense for a modern person in a western country, but what about historical mystics who undoubtedly accessed stage turquoise, but who obviously never went through stage orange, green, or yellow? An obvious example is the Buddha. How can a member of a stage blue society (Ancient India) jump right to stage turquoise, without passing through the other stages of the spiral? And there are countless examples of mystics like this.

So do you think meditating and working through all this turmoil will make me able to express myself authentically? One big thing is that i feel veru inauthentic when talking to people. Did meditation help you with that?

Im 18 years old in my first semester of college. I got very into meditation a year ago. Meditating became a habit and i definitely raised my conscioussness and had a couple spiritual awakenings (by no means enlightenment experiences). I also tried shrooms and lsd a few times. It has been very profound and beautiful but it has made many problems arise: Im young and i really havent formed a sense of identity yet and i dont have great social skills. I really dont know who i am and ive had quite an identity crisis lately. Meditation and spirituality is beautiful and transcendent and all, but could i be too young and immature to be focusing on it right now? I think sometimes that the psychedelics were a mistake for me being 17 and socially awkward. I feel in many ways that it makes it much harder for me to relate to people and talk about everyday things. I feel so different from the people around me and im very confused about life. Is all this confusion and turmoil part of the process or could i just not be ready for existential truth in my life? Sorry for the long post, but ive really had a hard time with this dilemma, and i cant find examples of people with a similar problem anywhere.