Forestluv

@Llight I think you are quite imaginative and creative. To me, this is an odd outlet to express such creativity. It's like someone with awesome musical abilities scratching their fingernails on a chalkboard. . . You could use your imaginative / creative abilities in other areas and excel. Something like writing a book, creating storylines. That's just my take, for what its worth.

To me, it seems the character intensity has been dialed up to about an 8. That's pretty impressive in terms of creativity. You could stop here and it would be a legit awful character in the movie and I wouldn't throw any shade. . . yet tbh I've seen dials go up to 11. . .

An interesting character you have created in the movie you are watching. Filters of perception. . .

At the human level, growth and experience is infinite. . , So of course, "I" have potential for more awakenings. That would be like saying Pi is in for some more numbers. . .

Various constructs we could build here. Let's bust out a hammer and saw. . . First, consider different "levels" of subjective understanding/embodiment. At an immature level, a person would be so immersed in their own subjective view / experience that they would consider that as being "objectively how it is". There is attachment / identification to the view / experience. As you say, there is immersion into an ego and an inability to assume another perspective. In terms of SD theory, this would be lower Green and below. At a "higher" level, there would be awareness of the relative nature of each view / experience. There is no attachment / identification to the view / experience. In SD, this is a trait of Tier2. . . This is a very different dynamic than above. The awareness of relativity and loss of attachment / identification allows for the seeing and understanding of another perspective.

My apologies. I thought you wanted to explore ideas about your original question. Looks like I misunderstood.

It depends on your definition of "many". The vast majority of people are fine on low doses of psychedelics. Microdosing has positive effects for most people. Microdosing is widespread in places like Silicon Valley and creative careers. Imo, we could consider microdosing a performance enhancing substance. And I've never heard of adverse effects of microdosing. . . Even into mini-dosing. . . At moderate to higher doses, there are some concerns related to ones background - their genetics, prior conditioning, neuroses etc. There are some with with psychedelics should be handled very carefully, or perhaps another method should be used. Yet I think saying this is "many people" is a bit misleading, since it is a minority of people. Wow. . . that is a major escalation. One doesn't need to abandon their lifestyle, job and re-route all their time to psychedelic work. All leading to an apocalyptic crash of global economies. . . That is a binary all or nothing model.. . . I've used psychedelics and I'm in the same job - it has actually enhanced my job in many ways. As well, how much time do people waste on things like video games and mindless TV shows? Could someone find 10-20 hours a month for a trip and integrative work? That averages out to 30min. a day for benefits. Not very time consuming. As well, this suggests that spirituality is some type of side-show - something I "have to do". To me, your post sounds like people I know that complain about exercising. "Yea, but exercise takes time and effort". . . This misses the whole point. Exercise is not like having a second job. It is the zest of life. Getting involved with groups in sports or yoga. Adopting a healthier diet. Running solo in nature. Traveling to run a 10k with friends. . . . This itself is the juicy experience in life. . . . Similarly, spirituality via meditation, retreats, time in nature, psychedelics, dharma talks etc. itself is the juiciness of life. And if spiritual development induces a career change, that is usually a good thing, because the person is moving toward work that is more aligned with their true nature and resonance. I've never met a spiritually-mature person that said "I used to have a wonderful job aligned with my true nature and resonance, yet after this spiritual practice and self-actualization I decided to change jobs into this crappy slave job that I hate". As well, if someone's genuine desire is to explore and discover Truth for Truth's sake, self-centered concerns become secondary.

@ttm The main point was about the orientation of asking questions, rather than the verbatim choice of words. In some contexts, too much focusing on words is a distraction from what is being pointed to. Yet I can now see how the word choice had an unintended impact. When the mind asks a question and already has an answer in mind (or a thick mental filter), there is often a mental dynamic in play that restricts the mind in a contracted state. And the mind often wants to control the narrative. For me, this awareness has been important to allow space to explore, grow and expand. Yet this doesn’t seem to be resonating with you, which is ok. Feel free to dismiss it if it isn’t helpful to you. It’s not about you personally. Perhaps this will resonate with someone else reading the thread. Or perhaps I’m on my own frequency here.

Thats another good one to add to the list. ?? The observations weren’t directed at you personally. Perhaps someone reading the thread will find it helpful.

You suggested the medication solved the problem, yet it seems like you stopped. I would be very cautious with medication, like adderall, because it stresses physiological systems and has dependency, tolerance and side effect issues. Something like modafinil might help, yet can't be used everyday. Ime, continuous long-term use of medication has more negatives than positives. Yet if someone can deal with low-doses 3-4 times a week it may be sustainable. You might also consider coping mechanisms. For example, when I was an undergrad I couldn't pay attention through a whole class. So I audio recorded all my lectures. I would listen to them over and over - sometimes with the textbook, sometimes while running. Also, I've found it helpful to get organized with daily activities and create time blocks in my day without distractions.

300 million in ads can't overcome Bloomberg's deficiencies. He is looks like Trump-lite to half of Democrats. Warren's take-down of Bloomberg on sexism and NDAs was a thing of beauty. It was one of the most precise attacks I've ever seen in a debate. And Bloomberg had huge self-inflicted wounds. That eye roll and saying "they just didn't like a joke" is a terrible response to give to a democratic audience. With another 300 million in ads, he may be able to sustain 10% - the people that watch a lot of TV and are not engaged in politics. I'm more concerned about what he might do behind the scenes to sabotage other candidates or a brokered convention. And if he runs third party, it would favor Trump. One of my biggest concerns last night was that Bernie was the only candidate that said he would support nominating a candidate with a plurality of votes - this has been the tradition in the Democratic party and it's concerning that every other candidate refused. If Bernie wins a plurality of votes and they deny him the nomination with super delegates on a second ballot - it's over. It would be 100x worse than the Clinton shenanigans. No way the Dems win.

After I ask a question, if I find myself responding in the below ways, it is often a sign that I am not asking the question with a genuine desire to learn, grow and expand. It's generally a sign that I already have an answer in mind and I'm filtering people that agree or disagree with me. "You are avoiding my question. I know why you are avoiding the question. . . " "You don't understand my question, go back and read it again. If it's too hard for you to understand, I'll try to make it more clear for you ". . . "You can't tell me what's true. I'll tell you how it is". . . For me, these are generally orientations that set up inter-personal conflict dynamics and hinder me from expanding.

Ime, the "dumb", "fool" and "idiot" buttons aren't very fruitful. They usually encourage an inter-personal conflict in which I'm on the offense as the "smart one" and puts them on the defensive as the "dumb one". i suppose this is an ok dynamic if my intention is to show how "smart" I am. Yet, if my intention is to help or contribute to someone's life, it's not a good dynamic. As well, I also try to be mindful of attempting to "change someone's life". My mind may judge someone's situation and what they "need" to do. Yet who am I to decide what's best for them? Have I actually asked them what they desire or what they wish to accomplish? For example, if someone asked about how to have a mystical experience and said they prefer not to take psychedelics, I wouldn't consider this "dumb". Sure, it might be harder for them to have a mystical experience without psychedelics, yet who am I to say what's best for them? They just told me that psychedelics is not best for them and I trust them on that. Who knows, perhaps psychedelics would induce a traumatic experience and be counter-productive to their path. So, I would think about other ways in my life I've had mystical experiences. This would likely resonate more strongly with them.

Yep. During an Ayahuasca retreat. . . Yet for me, It's not like there is a "spirit realm" induced by Ayahuasca and a "non-spirit" realm without Ayahuasca. It's all manifestations of spirit realms, including right now.

You seem to be assuming that any brain alteration is a "bad" thing? The results of this article are amazingly promising for the advancement of psychedelic therapy and spiritual progress. These are very good results. The main finding of this work were alterations in the DMN - which is the center of self-referential thinking. Hyper-connectivity of the DMN is associated with hyper self referential thinking, depression, stress and worry. This causes suffering, as well as challenges to spiritual progress. At a physical level, this is an area that psychologists. meditators, yogis etc are trying to re-structure through years of practice. That psychedelics like Aya are able to do this is a GOOD thing. Not only did Aya uncouple hyper-connectivity of the DMN, Aya practicioners scored better on transpersonal, transcendent tests and scored lower on things like self worry. That's the whole point. . . When I read this article, I was like "YES!!! Finally, neuroscientists are starting to observe benefits of psychedelics at a physical, metaphysical, therapeutic and spiritual levels". And it's not just with Aya. Other studies with psylocybin therapy for people with depression and PTSD have also shown restructuring of the DMN, less self-referential thinking, less depression, less anxiety and less PTSD episodes (which is a good thing). Of course, not all brain re-structuring is beneficial to well-being at the human level. There may be some areas in which psychedelics have undesirable effects. Knowing what these are can help the development of a new generation of psychedelic substances. For example, the article you linked showed some very promising good results with how Aya restructures the DMN. Perhaps another study might show that Aya-associated purging has undesirable effects on the autonomic nervous system. Then we could design a new form of Aya that preserves the good DMN restructuring properties and eliminates the unwanted ANS properties.

It seemed like you originally grouped it all as "bullshit", yet then subdivided that into "bullshit" that works and "bullshit" used by scammers and psychopaths that prey on the weak and wounded. Those are two different dynamics at two different levels. For example, Turquoise-level psychics and Reiki masters that strive to help others is very different than Orange-level psychics and Reiki pretenders that want to scam people out of their money. . . You say you know the difference, yet grouped it together in your original post. You say that Mr. Gurgles is your "imaginary fried". This is a very condenscending tone, for example that is often used with people that have schizophrenia as having "an imaginary friend". My niece is a master lucid dreamer and quite often people speak to her as if this is her "imaginary friend". Being call out someone as having an "imaginary friend" is a huge judgement of ignorance that will create a massive disconnect that cannot be bridged. It can also cause a huge amount of distress to the other person, because they are being judged as not meeting a "myth of normal". (E.g. seeing the sun, rather than their "imaginary friend"). If you can't see it, that is your limitation and your contraction. You would not be able to expand and deepen your understanding. It doesn't matter if you throw in a line about "the sun and imaginary friends both being real on different layers". This is just another creation of a two-tier system of the "real real" layer and the "imagined real" layer. To me, it seems clear your "imagined real" layer is second rate relative to your "real real" layer. Again, I think an important dynamic here is genuineness. Someone coming from a place of genuineness is different than a scammer making up bullshit to swindle people out of their money. To me, these dynamics were very obvious in Sedona, AZ. There were many people their that were highly conscious, had abilities and had done a lot of practice and skill development. And there were others that were charlatans that saw an opportunity to trick people out of their money.

I can understand wanting to raise children. Yet I don’t understand the desire to pass on “my” genetic sequence. It would be like writing a book and every 25 years, half the book gets scrambled into gibberish. After one lifetime of 100 years, it is completely illegible. It seems pointless to me. And at least writing this book that is destined to decay would be something I personally created. In contrast, I feel no personal connection to my genetic sequence. It’s like an abstract idea to me.

This isn’t surprising at all for Ayahuasca. Spirit realms is a common theme. And everything is a spirit realm. It’s all around you. . .

One route is to go through an intellectual analysis of what awakening is and the best environment to attain this awakening. Perhaps there is some value in that. . . Another approach I resonate with these types of uncertainty questions/actions is to go inward and ask:. . . . "right now, which direction would lead to more contraction and which will lead to more expansion?". And then I listen to feelings and intuition - rather than a bunch of rationalization. If I observed the story "”your still young, you don’t have your financial grounding yet, your business only just starting to take off, your just about your own place. Give it a year, few years to settle, than you can fully surrender”. . . and then ask "right now, does this story lead to more contraction or greater expansion?" and then sit with the intuition and feelings - there is a sense of clarity for me which path leads to greater expansion potential. Yet thats me. Other people may have different relationships with that question. For example, if I don't contract into the story - there is room to expand. . . perhaps there aren't only two options: either awaken OR get financial grounding. An expanded space would allow for more options. It allows space for new creativity, exploration and insights to arise. . .

@Ethan_05 Another way to view it is attachment/identification. A mind can have a relationship with a phenomena without "believing it". Belief is a form of holding onto something with attachment/identification. . . For example, if I was with a bunch of classical musicians discussing whether Bach or Beethoven was more of a musical genius. I could become very curious and learn a lot. I don't know much of either composer. Yet all the ideas would float around like a bowl of stew. I wouldn't really "believe" any of the ideas in the sense of attachment. Holding to any of the ideas would limit my fluidity and capacity to learn. "How can we live a life with a radically open mind without going down some obscure path and believing everything that falls into our laps?" I would use the term "gullible" here, rather than being open-minded. For me, I would say a "gullible sensor" is a combination of intuition, resonance and rational thought. If a drunk person gave me a stone and told me this stone will correct all my DNA mutations, synergize my astral planes and grant me three wishes - I probably wouldn't resonate with that and my intuitiion would kick in. Then my mind might create a rational story of why this doesn't make sense. . . . On the flip side, someone might tell me they have a paranormal ability. The rational mind may kick in and think "this is woo woo BS", yet a deeper intuition and resonance might arise. If the mind relaxes, it could allow space to explore.

I would trust your intuition and get in touch with your feelings and be mindful of creating new thought stories of identification. I probably wouldn't address it through smoking everyday - for me it would probably just create a new habit and escape realm. I would put some effort into experiencing it in the moment. If social anxiety arises, get in touch with it. I've found a little bit of thought story ok for grounding, yet it's super easy to get immersed into these stories of "who I am". The actuality of what is happening Now is super important for me. And that means experiencing whatever is happening now and not trying to get to some other place. Substances can be a method to get to another place, yet so is thinking and imagining. One of my mind's #1 escapes is to think about who I am and spirituality.

@Martin123 All good. I consider it a compliment.

A bit of an odd situation with a gal I was recently dating. . . . There aren't many women I meet that are into self-actualization, awakening, spirituality, exploring different realms etc. . . So a couple months ago, I met a gal and we immediately connected. Even our first date, we sat and eye gazed for several minutes at a time and went to transcendent states. Like we had met each other before, knew each other, were separated and now re-united. There was a sense of joy, yet also of sadness. It was like the separation and re-uniting was a pattern. There was joy of being re-united, yet also a sadness of impending separation - like we are not allowed to be together for some reason. I got this sense immediately. It wasn't like a "woo woo" thing, it felt very real and grounded. She had similar experiences. . . And our time together was so effortless. It flowed so beautifully. Yet it seemed transcendent to the practicalities of life. When we got together it was like the "common life" of 4D dissolved and we were in a 5D realm. . . One of my senses was that the practicalities of life would again separate us. That this "transcendent" connection would not hold and this was the sadness of our "soul contract" - it was like each time we get reunited, something would arise and separate us. So. . . what happened? After being together a couple weeks, she tells me she is separated and going through a divorce. She tells me that she and her husband have agreed to date others, that he knows about me and is totally fine with it. This of course triggers a huge red flag, yet this seemed to be somewhat trivial relative to the transcendent connection I felt with her. I've only felt this a couple times in my life. . . So I decide to keep going with her, yet with a bit more distance. . . . And then one time we are together, I my phone blows up with repetitive calls from a "Caller Unknown". I answer it and it's the husband. He wants to know my intention with his wife. I hang up and he gets upset, re-calling and sending texts that I am messing with his wife and he will hold me accountable for anything that might happen. This is harassment and threats that I don't want to engage in. . . A couple days later, he tells me he had an acute episode and apologizes for his behavior. I tell the gal it made me unsettled and I needed some space. She tells me it's not that big a deal, that they are moving forward with the divorce and he is better now. . . A couple other unsettling things is that they had been separated for two years, yet they got back together every 5 months or so for sex and perhaps some type of emotional support. Yet the husband was clearly still hoping to get back together and her doing this is harmful to the husband as it re-ignites his hopes. Even though he threatened me, I really felt for the husband. I can totally understand his pov and his feelings - I've been in a similar situation. A couple weeks later, we go to a symphony and have a great time. I think perhaps we can be friends or perhaps dating if things do settle down with the husband. Last Saturday, I send her a text asking if she would like to get together and she responds: "I would like to say yes, however if you were unsettled by my storyline before (well, actually, the storyline of somebody in my life), then you will be even more unsettled now. The process of divorce is long and messy and not for the faint of heart. . . " I responded that I enjoyed our time together and felt a unique connection with her. Perhaps we could get together as friends sometime. . . . I haven't heard back from her and notice she is back active on the Bumble dating site (and hasn't indicated she is still married). So, another guy may get involved in this mess. As well, I found the phrase "it's not for the faint of heart" to be interesting. It seems she wants to meet a guy that will get involved in the "long messy" process and stick by her side in spite of the mess. And she suggests things are getting worse - does that mean the husband will ramp things up and contact some guy's work? Trash his car? Show up at his house? Restraining orders?. . . As well, I found the line "if you were unsettled by my storyline (well, actually, the storyline of somebody in my life. . . ". It's interesting in how she is dissociating herself from her husband. They were married 20 years and have a daughter. They live 2 miles apart and are in daily contact. They help take care of each other's houses and re-unite for a sexual fling every few months and he is threatening a man she dates. How on earth is that the "storyline of someone else in my life"? Perhaps she has a deep desire to dissociate from him, yet for some reason cannot. A few things I now reflect on: -- That transcendent connection seemed sooo real. And it really seemed like we both shared it. Could we have had some transpersonal soul connection, yet earthly personalities and practicalities overcame it? -- Could both have been true? Could she be this transcendent being I connected with, yet also a human behaving unhealthy? Yet if so, why would she dump me like this when it became apparent that I didn't want to play the role of a romantic partner walking through a messy divorce with her? She could have said something like - "we re-united again, yet the timing is not right". Yet she left without any indication that the transcendent connection was "real". That is what's so disappointing to me because now I feel like it wasn't real and I was just taken for a sucker again. And if there is a transcendent "soul contract" of re-uniting, getting separated due to personal life circumstances, disappointment and sadness - it doesn't get resolved and will continue on . . .

Along the theme of prior conditioning and thought stories. . . Last Saturday, I was with a psychologist friend - she wanted to show me her office. As we sat there, it didn't take long for her asking questions about my childhood. I felt some resistance since it seemed like she was creating some thought story of me. Some type of character or identity. . . Due to the conditioning I received from my parents, I now have "x, y and z" neuroses and physical problems. This just felt like some thought story she was creating. I just wanted to enter what is happening now in my mind and body. What am I feeling now, without any creation of thought stories or characters. . . Yet this didn't feel right either. It was like there was a dynamic of both. . . Yet every time she brought me back to my father's behavior and the consequences on me, it felt like story creation. I started getting really uncomfortable. She switched gears and asked me to describe what my body was feeling and what my body wanted to do. She asked me to push away with my arms "Is that what your body wants to do?". No. . . She kept asking "what does your body want to do?". I didn't know. . . Then I looked at the door and everything became clear. All of the energy in my body wanted to get up and leave. Yet importantly, not to leave her or what was happening Now. . . She told me to go ahead and walk out the door. I couldn't do it. I wasn't allowed to. . . She told me again to get up and walk out the door. . . I was paralyzed. . . And then my body got up and walked out the door. There was this huge relief and release. And a knowing that arose. It had nothing to do with my psychologist friend and wanting her to stop. . . There was absolute clarity. . . During my entire childhood, my father would get upset with me and put me on a couch and lecture me for hours about how I screwed up, how I'm harming the family, how I'm not good enough etc. I didn't want to push him away, I just wanted to be able to stand up and leave. Yet I wasn't allowed to and this feeling got repressed to the point I was no longer able to recognize it. We are talking hundreds of times and hours of this. After a while, I just started dissociating. That was my way of "leaving". . . When I stood up and walked out of her office, I wasn't leaving her. It was the energetic dynamic conditioned into me from my father and not being allowed to ever leave and repressed emotion. Some may say I'm just creating a new thought story. Perhaps I am. Yet there also seems to be some energetic dynamic happening now that was entangled with my father. There was not "past" and "present". Both were now. Perhaps similar to entanglement within quantuum mechanics.

I know this dynamic well. Taking a psychedelic and entering a space of "I shouldn't have done this. I want to go back". Yet I can't go back and there can be a panic of not being able to go back. Not being able to stop it. As well, time often has no meaning during a trip. When in that timeless anxiety/panic space, 4 minutes, 4 hours, 4 weeks and 4 years all have something in common: they are all "not now". Again, if you enter these spaces I would recommend taking extra care with psychedelics. This might be a dynamic that needs to be worked through. Ime, there were people that told me the anxiety issue is just egoic resistance to ego death and awakening and I need to face it. They were well-meaning and this is true in a way. Yet they also didn't have to live with weeks or months of trauma-related anxiety. Like I said, we wouldn't take an 8 year old boy and drop him in the middle of Mumbai by himself. As well, that anxiety inducing infinity can also become peaceful / blissful.