Emerald

@kingroboto By the way, how old are you?

Your projection is very strong. You have to realize at some point when you're being delusional.

Something tells me that this isn't true...

Precisely. Only they're not circling you. They're leaving you out of their concerns entirely.

Unfortunately, you'll never find a woman like that with your chosen paradigm and negative projections onto women. Psychologically healthy women will pick up on your issues with women from a thousand miles away, and steer clear of you. Best to just stick to yourself until you can work through things. At this point, your only matches would be women who are equivalent to you in terms of consciousness. This is why emotionally damaged, entitled, and manipulative women are the only ones that you ever seem to come across. Like attracts like. Here's an example... One time, our van stalled out, and I had to take a cab in to work. I used to teach high school graphic design at the time. And I always liked to dress very professionally. And the guy who was driving the cab... you could tell that he'd had a rough life and that he probably had some drug and alcohol problems. He was a nice guy and all. But his speech was slurred and he talked and acted kind of trashy. He reminded me a lot of the spun out middle aged people in my home town. And he was asking me some basic questions about what I do. And he was genuinely flabbergasted that I existed and had a job and goals and things. He said he had never met a woman who wasn't addicted to pills. So, he was HYPER complimenting me because I had my shit together. And I said thank you. But at the same time, I didn't really consider it that much of a compliment. I was around tons of women who weren't addicted to pills and had their shit together. In fact, no women that I was personally close with at the time even did pills to my knowledge. So, it was really obvious to me that the guy was just keeping company with a lot of other people that were like him. And then he was assuming that the people he encountered were just the way people are in general. To him, dysfunction was normal. And he was judging women, that (if he were a woman) he would be exactly like them. And he was probably guilty of the "pills" and "no goals" thing himself, that he judged the women in his life so much for. Now, I'm not saying that you're like that guy. I'm just saying that you're assuming the same things about reality that he is. Basically, that the people you keep company with and encounter are the norm. And then projecting the worst judgment onto women as a whole group, even when you're guilty of the same crimes.

Reality is empty of both worth and worthlessness. So, any judgment of worth comes about subjectively and has no backing in reality. So, if we go around assigning worth to others, we will be creating a system of judgment that we will unconsciously use upon ourselves. This is why we can't love ourselves. We believe in the idea that some people are worth more than others. Then, we don't know why we can't love ourselves. It's because we're always judging ourselves against those contrived standards of worth and value. So, no. No one is worth anything. And likewise no-one is worthless. Our being is so far beyond the idea of worth, that we can't even fathom of how unshakably valid we are until we let go of the illusion of worth and value.

Well, why does your personality suck? You know that the personality is your own creation, right? So, you can actually take your personality and exalt it to better versions of itself. Growth is possible.

The problem here is that men don't know what makes men attractive to women. In fact, I am very attracted to men who are more reserved. They're more mysterious, and it makes me want to know them more. And plenty of women share my tastes. So, men are very objective but not very picky with their attractions. Women, on the other hand are very picky but very subjective at the same time. So, men have one zone of difficulty and one zone of easiness. And women have one zone of difficulty and one zone of easiness. The problem happens when men think that women get attractions like they do... only they're a lot pickier. Women's attractions toward men, are TOTALLY different. Men project that women are both picky and objective with their attractions. So, they believe women have two zones of difficulty, when they have only one. This is the problem with men assuming that women get attractions like they do. And from there it's very easy to project objectification onto women. Generally speaking, women's attractions are intuitive, subjective, and holistic. It's not the case that they have some laundry list of attractive qualities that they cross reference men against. And it's not the case that they're attracted to all men over a certain degree of attractiveness according to those standards. This is how men are attracted to women. It's not how women are attracted to men. Women usually like only one man at a time. And she likes him in a way that the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. So, women's attractions are subjectifying and not objectifying. If a woman likes you, chances are she likes you simply because you're you.

What I'm saying is that a lot of women don't realize that they can get guys easily in a physical way. So, the thought that the OP is trolling is incorrect thinking. She really doesn't know that this is true. But don't spread that victim mentality around. Everyone can find a partner. No one is un-datable. It will be a little (and I do mean a little) more difficult for a man to find a woman because of biological reasons and common sense reasons. Women are more selective because they can have fewer children and will invest her entire body and nine months of her life in the creation of those children. Men, on the other hand could father a new child every time he has sex with a new woman, if he gets her pregnant. So, a man could have thousands of children in his lifetime if he tried. A woman would max out around 20 children. But everyone can find a partner. And women tend not to be as looks focused as men, and are more holistic with their attractions. So, even less attractive guys will be able to find someone if they're decent people with something going for them.

Many women don't know this... especially if they're under the age of 21 or so. And for most women (if not all), there is never a sense that they can get the guy they like to like them back. It's never for certain. This is true of myself included when I was single. If I liked a guy, I'd be terrified he'd reject me or think I'm weird/creepy for liking him. Now, once I turned about 13, I realized that there were guys that existed on the planet who would be interested in me. So, I knew that I wasn't un-datable at that point. Now, when I was 12, that's a different story. But if I hadn't had success of some kind, I could have harbored that belief into adulthood. So, she's definitely not trolling. Many women don't realize that most men will be interested in them in some capacity and have a lot of self-esteem issues around their desirability. I feel like a lot of men don't realize that about women though, and tend to think it's a one-sided game where women hold all the cards. I had a friend of mine back when I was 20, and she was like 21. And she was super cute... definitely at least a 6 or a 7 in the looks department. She also was really cool and had a lot going for her intellligence-wise and creativity-wise. But she was also very sheltered. So, she had never had a boyfriend. Then, this guy at a bar kissed her and she was really surprised and elated that he wanted to kiss her. I however, was not so surprised. Of course he did. She's a cute girl. I was, however, super surprised that it was her first kiss though.

He's right though. I genuinely was trying to help you. I was a bit frustrated, and it probably showed. Understandably. But I see a ton of guys get really trapped in these ideologies to where they can't see out of them. And it really distorts reality and makes it impossible to truly grow.

Perfectly said!

As always, there is strength in numbers. So, when women come out against powerful men in large numbers all of a sudden (even years later), it's similar to a class action lawsuit. A single person who has little power compared to a big corporation may feel powerless to challenge that big corporation and take them to court, even if that big corporation is doing shady things that negatively effect them. So, they may want to save themselves the headache of being the lone dissenter toward a powerful entity. But when there is a class action lawsuit, there is power in numbers. So, they will get a little more anonymity and won't be single out. And it will be much more difficult for a large corporation to smear them and their reputation. So, it's safer. The same goes for the 'me too' movement. Men like Harvey Weinstein have a long track-record of sexual misconduct and sexual assault. But he is a very powerful producer who's worked with the best in the business. So, when there is an actress... especially one who is just starting out, she knows that he can put an end to her career right away if she comes out against him. So, they weigh the options, and decide that it's best to just move on as opposed to throwing their dreams in the dumpster. So, they swallow their trauma and move on with life. But years later, if other women start coming forward, it becomes much easier to be honest about those instances as they won't be the lone dissenter facing off against a powerful man with their career in his hands. This is why, when one woman steps forward and accuses a powerful man of these crimes, others start coming out of the woodwork even if the assault occurred a decade or two ago. There is strength and power in numbers. And once these women feel like they have numbers on their side, it becomes a lot easier to be honest about these things. To come out about these things alone, means that society as a whole will blame you and will want your head on a stick. Victim blaming is a widespread epidemic. That's the whole idea behind the widespread nature of the 'me too' movement. It encourages strength in numbers. So, it may have begun in Hollywood as a result of cases like Bill Cosby's many rapes or Harvey Weinstein's history of sexual assault and coercion. But it's trickled not the mainstream because we're starting to see some of humanity's darker shadows that mostly women have been privy to. So, it's a movement for solidarity, and I'm personally glad that it's hit the mainstream.

My heart smiles when you speak my thoughts. ... and anytime you say anything disapprovingly about Jordan Peterson especially. My heart smiles really big. Maybe it's a bit petty. But I hate the fact that there are so many people who are caught up in this dangerous collective delusion that these figures all propagate and profit from at the expense of the people and the Earth. I hate how much control they seem to be able to exert over the masses.

@TheBeachBionic Don't worry. You are. Everyone's attractive to someone. And I'm not making this up. It's 100% true. You may not have mass appeal, if you are as unattractive as you say. But someone will be attracted to you. Probably plenty of guys will be. You just have to find one that you're also attracted to, who is a good partner. If you've never really put yourself out there and tried to date, you may not know this. But it's 100% true. I can't think of a single person that I've EVER met who I thought was going to be unattractive to everyone. That literally never happens. And when I say this, I've definitely met ones and twos before. Some of which were already in relationships or married, but other were single. But with the single ones, I knew they could find partners if they wanted to.

I made a video for you. Just posted it a few hours before you created this thread.

Thank you!

Like I said before, men are usually not picky. Most are just thrilled to be getting attention from a woman in general. So, even if you believe yourself to be unattractive and are indeed as unattractive as you say, there will ALWAYS be TONS of men who want to sleep with you. It's not hard for LITERALLY any woman to get sex from a man. Somebody's going to want to do it. And it doesn't matter that much what you look like, if sex is what you're looking for. If you are open to it, there will be men willing to do it... In fact, some would even be willing to pay you for it. That's how wiling they would be to do it. So, getting sex from some random man is about as easy as it gets, if that's all you want and you're not being selective about which man you get sex from. You'll have thousands lined up knocking on your door about it. Of course, this is meaningless, and ultimately wouldn't be satisfying. With random men who are looking for sex, as a woman with sexual needs, it's alway like being dehydrated in the middle of the ocean. As they say, "Water. Water everywhere. But not a drop to drink." Sure. You could get sex from them easily. And this is 100% true. You may not have realized this yet. But it is. Trust me. But the only thing that will really quench the thirst is a sexual connection that is intimate, personal, and specific. And for that, it has a lot more to do with personality than it has to do with looks. Attraction may play a role. And there will be men out there who will be attracted to you. They will also probably be of a similar attractiveness level to you. So, there will be a possibility for a deep, meaningful relationship with a guy who's worthwhile, regardless of what you look like as well. So, if you're looking for sex. Don't worry! If you really wanted that, you could get fifty men per day to graciously agree to do it. But if you're looking for a relationship. Don't worry! There will be men who are congruent with you, who will like you for who you are. So, as I said before, it might be a bit more difficult for you to find a relationship if you're unattractive. But it won't be THAT much more difficult.

Like I said, IF that is true, it will be a bit more difficult. But it's definitely not impossible by any stretch of the mind. I know tons of less attractive people (men and women) who are now happily married or in a relationship. It's just a matter of being open to dating and being social in general. Plus, studies have shown that partners tend to have a similar attractiveness level. So, if you are unattractive, then there are going to be other unattractive guys who are looking for partners as well. You just have to find someone who matches you, not only in the realm of physical attractiveness but in the realm of personality as well. Now, if you're unattractive and have you heart set on dating someone who looks like Channing Tatum or something like that, that's going to seriously impede your ability to find someone. But as long as your standards are reasonable and you put yourself out there as being open to dating and relationships, there will be men who'll be interested. You just have to find one who you clique with on deeper levels.

Well, if you are indeed unattractive physically, it will be a bit more difficult to find a significant other. Not impossible by any stretch of the imagination. But a bit more difficult. But I think a lot of women believe themselves to be less attractive than they are. Self esteem tends to be a huge issue. So, I'm inclined to believe that you're probably over-estimating your degree of physical unattractiveness, for this reason. Perhaps, open your mind that you may not be as unattractive as you believe yourself to be. Now, I don't know, because I haven't seen a picture of you or anything. This is just my guess. I suffered from the same belief that I was the ugliest girl until I was somewhere in middle school. It was especially bad when I was in early elementary school. I was a very romantically precocious child. The earliest crush I can remember was when I was 3 years old. I decided that I was going to marry the neighbor boy, so I could kiss him. And any romantic element to a movie or story of any kind was always my favorite thing about that movie or story. So, I was very boy-crazy... secretly. I kept it to myself. And I was taking it to my grave. But over the course of my entire life until age 6, I never had any of the boys I liked reciprocate my feelings or had anyone have a crush on me. So, by then, I had figured that no boys liked me because I was ugly and just not worthy in general. I also thought it was because I wasn't blonde. I had also thought that other kids were already having boyfriends and girlfriends. So, I had this illusion that I was the only girl who was too ugly to be liked by a boy. I also thought it was because I was flat-chested (even though everyone else was in the 1st grade too. I just didn't notice because my thoughts eclipsed the reality). And I remember thinking hypothetically, what if some old bald fat ugly man was the only one that would want to be my boyfriend? And I hoped I would say no to being his girlfriend because the idea repulsed me. But I also thought that no one in my entire life would ever want to be my boyfriend, so I might have to say yes to this hypothetical old bald fat ugly man because I'd have to go with whichever option was open to me... and that might be the only one. And I've always carried around insecurities about my looks, which at times play like a broken record in my mind. I'm inclined to believe that this is something that many if not most women are going through. But the thing I noticed that made me a lot more secure about this is in relation to dating and relationships is that men generally aren't really picky. They have a pretty wide range of who they find attractive and who they're willing to be involved with. And most of them are just glad to have some kind of female attention, to be honest. So, I have no doubt that you'll be able to find someone who's interested in you. You just have to seem approachable, normal, and open to dating. It also helps to wear make-up and dress up a bit.

There is much more to the feminine principle than what society relates to it. The feminine has been largely unconscious to us for many millennia, save for a few relational feminine aspects that can't be sacrificed if we want society to continue. So, motherhood, attractiveness to men, and care taking are largely what makes up societal ideas of the feminine. But there's so much more going on there than meets the eye. In fact, it extends far beyond the expression of human women. It is a principle that imbues all of reality. The masculine is the same way. So, creativity, strong emotions like falling in love (thus the association with romanticism), motherhood, attractiveness to men are all part and parcel to the feminine principle as it relates to women and the feminine side in men. But they're really just the tip of the iceberg in relation to human women (and the feminine side of human men) and reality at large. But I would say that a subtractive approach to discovering your feminine side is probably best. If you try to "put on" or "add" feminine energy to yourself, it'll just be a bunch of ideas that are derived from culture and relational understandings, which are limited and often distorted. And because they are of the mind and are thoughts, ideas, and beliefs about the feminine, they will still ultimately belong to the masculine principle. But if you approach it in a subtractive way, you're just removing the barriers to realizing whatever happens to be there regardless of labeling it masculine or feminine or neither. So, I'd say the best way to get in touch with the feminine aspect of yourself is to really explore the realm of the emotions. Emotions are a mysterious realm inside every human being that belongs to the feminine. There's a lot going on there, and it's a realm that's home to all the wisdom and insights that you could ever need. It's like a dark watery cave with many treasures buried in it, which is also home to many monsters. Emotions carry wisdom. So, this is why wisdom is an aspect of the feminine principle, esoterically speaking. But our culture is very masculine oriented and doesn't look well upon emotions in general. They are looked at more as signs of weakness and something to hide away. So, we get in the habit of repressing how we feel and instead prefer to defer to the mind and its "Shoulds" and "Should nots". So, I recommend getting in touch with your emotions and practice validating them. Think of it as an aspect of yourself to explore and discover things in. And remove limiting beliefs about emotions being weak or unmanly. It's certainly not for the faint of heart. It is only the realm of emotions that people can root themselves into reality enough to be grounded and receive wisdom. This will also provide you stability and save you from gullibility while you're doing inquiries into higher nature things.

The idea of sexual transmutation (when referred to as sexual transmutation) has become popular among men. So, you're unlikely to find any substantial information about female sexual transmutation if you Google it that way. But ultimately, what has come to be known as sexual transmutation has to do with libidinal energy being able to be expressed at "higher" levels than at the level of pro-creation. This libidinal energy which comes as a result of the tension between polarities within ourselves also has many other names: Kundalini energy, prana, life force energy, chi, etc. etc. etc. The reason why libidinal energy stagnates within us and stays "lowly" and only at the level of sexuality, is likely because we are repressing one half of our polarity. So, the interplay between Yin and Yang (and all the other polarities these subtle energies inform) is stunted and can't generate as much libidinal energy. This usually comes about when a person represses their less dominant energy. So, a person who represses their less dominant energy will alway be looking for someone to complete them. So, a man will repress his femininity. And he will desperately come to seek that feminine part of himself through projection onto a women. So, sex will feel like the only acceptable way to be in touch with that aspect of himself. And it will be such a dire emergency to have contact with the feminine that all of his energy will be hung up in a deep need for sex. And his masculine energy that he hasn't repressed will remain "low" in order to seek the feminine separate from himself, as he has repressed his own femininity and made it impossible to have a connection with the internal feminine. Then, because he wants to be attractive to women, he wants to repress his feminine away more and more. So it becomes a repression snowball effect. I see this all the time. But when the masculine and feminine are allowed to express themselves and enter into intercourse within an individual, there is no need to express libidinal energy low and it can be transmuted upward toward other things. And there will be a lot more energy produced as well because those polar energies can intermingle freely as they do in all of nature. So a lot more energy is accrued. So, largely it has to do, for both genders with being able to accept all aspects of one's self and all polarities. Then, these polarities will have a lot of tension which creates the libidinal energy that can then be transmuted toward things of a "higher' nature. Physically speaking, I would imagine that many men who have addictions of a sexual nature, are repressing their feminine aspect, also called the Anima. So, there is probably both an aversion toward the feminine in themselves and an equally strong pull toward re-integration of the feminine. So, because the non-sexual outlets for connection with the feminine have been blocked off within themselves, there is a deep pressure to be accepted by the feminine in a sexual way in the form of women. And if this is not possible, porn and masturbation is a substitute. And the small amount of libidinal energy that they have is spent on this. Now, I think you won't find as many women struggling with this problem. The social stigma for women accepting their masculine side is a lot less than the social stigma for men accepting their feminine side. So, this is also probably another reason why women aren't looking for this information too much. The bigger problem would likely be the tension between their own libidinal energy and the ideas that society projects onto it. And this causes a lot of repression. Or it causes an attempt to fit into the temptress box and relate your own creative energies to being objectified and pleasure to being treated poorly. So, these confusions and pleasure/pain inversions are more likely to be barriers for women than spending all the libidinal energy. This would be harder anyway, because women tend to have a lot more energy going on around the sacral chakra area, since this is where the womb is. That's just a guess though. I don't have a standard of comparison. It just makes sense to me. So, the problem isn't draining, but instead is over-engorgment, stagnation, and repression. Also, inability to climax, inability to let go, and inability to express creatively are indicators of this same barrier.

I'm glad that they helped!

I made videos on the topic. I've mostly used sleep paralysis for the OBEs, but I've done a little bit with lucid dreaming as well. Here are the videos. And if you have any specific question, feel free to ask. @cetus56 Thank you for recommending me.