Emerald

It is quite possible that that's true. Though I've only seen a few videos... so I'm not sure if he's a genuine bitter misogyny or if he's just grifting as a bitter misogynist because that career path is lucrative. But if he's the former, he probably has a whole myriad of traumas, unmet needs, and blindspots that have made him become bitter and mean-spirited towards women. And it could be the case that some of those are romantic... but others might be relating to other areas of life. Like when I was 10 years old (during my last year of elementary school and the following summer) I had a yearlong phase where I was extremely overtly misogynistic... believing (on some level) that I was the only nice girl/woman. And I believed that all girls/women were mean and cruel. And all of my friends were boys. I refused to be friends with girls. Then, sometimes I'd be hit with this cognitive dissonance because I also recognized that there were plenty nice girls/women that I encountered in school. But I had to pretend they didn't exist whilst also knowing they did. But I just had such hate for other girls (and women). And I even created an entirely different gender distinction for myself to feel exempt from the biting judgment of my own misogyny... as I conceptualized myself as neither male nor female. And a lot of the perspectives that I held at the time were like a non-sexually charged version of what Incels/Red Pill guys say about women. Like, I can see my own internalized misogyny in them... which is a force of nature, on its own. Anti-Feminine sentiment can be hard to shake in a society that abhors the Feminine principle... especially if someone has issues with their mom or with making friends with girls/women.

You might have made the same mistake I did. My mind edited out the word "less" when I first read it. So, I was thinking that those are the same exact things. So, I read it as "Big difference between Emerald and Leo - they inject a lot less of themselves into their work. But Teal's personality is very much present."

One thing I would say in relation to this is that I might include some anecdotes from my personal life as it serves the topic at hand. And of course, Leo does this too. But I think the thing you're picking up on with Teal Swan is the tendency to self-celebrate a lot within her perspectives as a driving force within what she shares. She's also serving the topic at hand, but there is a tendency to put out perspectives that are more about herself... like her struggles with fame and getting criticisms, or her relationships, or her past traumas, or her path as a spiritual teacher, etc.

I tend to think it's quite common for people who get into things like personal development... and spiritual seeking. But truthfully, average people seem to get on okay most of the time. The main drawback of lacking the drive towards divergence is that people can tend to stay in a reactive state to life as opposed to an initiatory state... which requires a questioning of the status quo and a level of individuation such that they can realize a different vision to what is.

You put it very well. Mind you, I say all this as a longtime fan of her work. I enjoy her perspective and have gotten a lot from her. But it's clear to me that this is one of her biggest short-comings... and I think of it as a cautionary tale to learn from for anyone who is interested in leadership of any kind.

I've been to 3 of her synchronization workshops over the course of the past decade. I've gone pretty much every time she does an event in Florida. And you can tell that she really revels in praise from the audience. And it isn't an act just to look gracious, as that looks quite different. It's clear that it really means something to her.

Thank you so much! I'm glad you like my channel! It definitely is like that. And it's important with having an audience and the power that comes with that to detach somewhat from things like praise... and criticism as well. Really, that's the double-edged sword where the degree to how seriously you take one of those is the degree to how seriously you take both of those. But it's sort of like in the Wizard of Oz... instead of seeing the man behind the curtain and realizing their own power... people can get caught up in the illusions of "Oz the Great and Powerful." And there's value in playing the role of the Wizard of Oz, as long as it works in service to others realizing their own power... like how the Wizard of Oz helped the Scarecrow realize he was intelligent, the Tin Man realize he was heart-centered, and the Lion realize he was courageous. (which was clearer in the book than it was in the movie) But that takes a lot of responsibility and the development of good judgment to play the role of Oz the Great and Powerful in the instances where necessary without getting caught up in the illusion one's self.

Yes, I've noticed that. And while I really enjoy her work, it's not a helpful quality to have for a teacher to revel in adoration from fans. It just adds to the illusion of being some different kind of human being. And it causes people to disown and project their own power and sovereignty onto the teacher that does that. She'd be a lot more effective if she were to take praise with a grain of salt and re-direct people to recognize their own power and specialness. Also, I don't know how she stands it. I have a modestly sized YouTube audience (a little under 70k subs), and I met with a coaching client a couple of years ago. And he was putting me up on a pedestal and calling me "Goddess" and stuff like that. And I just felt bad for him as I could see his vulnerability. And I felt really uncomfortable with having that kind of "superlativity" projected upon me. So, if people are giving me too much praise, I'm just like "Oh no! I'm doing a bad job at empowering people and helping people embody their own sense of sovereignty!"

Well, takes one to know one, I suppose. Even in childhood, I used to fantasize that I was a supernatural being... as I was always trying to set myself apart from others. Part of that was a reflection of a difficulty with belonging... of being different in a bad way and feeling outcast and disconnected. And the other was this driver to be different and superlative in some way... and to diverge either in quality or in kind from others. And my adolescent identity followed suit with that... as I was always trying to be a special snowflake and avoid common humanity. And that embrace of my inner alien and the pride in my divergence enabled me to develop a lot of special skills and qualities that I otherwise wouldn't have developed. But the re-integration of ordinariness has been at the heart of my inner work since 2021... when Ayahuasca showed me how everything I had ever wanted is on the other end of integrating ordinariness. The medicine kept bringing me back and forth between two states... One state was my usual MO, just exaggerated... which was polarization into extraordinariness to the exclusion of ordinariness. And the sense of disconnection and alienation was very palpable (a feeling I hadn't been cognizant of since childhood). It was like being a puzzle piece that had gotten taken up out of the puzzle and was floating in thin air, with all the weight of existence resting squarely on my head and shoulders. Then, the medicine would bring me back into the integration between both extraordinariness and ordinariness... and I felt connected with humanity, with nature, and one with the universe at large. And the existential weight was lifted from me, and I could relax and exist in this highly connected state. And the plant teacher kept toggling me back and forth between these two states until I understood what it was showing me. Then, it put me in this "scene" that was like I was at the precipice of connection... almost like a line. And I had all these ordinary collective phrases flitting through my my mind like: community, family, church, relationship, etc. And I felt this deep aversion to all of these words, as it was always what I was trying to avoid. But I sat there shaky on the edge of the decision to enter the realm of the collective ordinariness... but fearful to do so. So, I know that one of my biggest growth arcs comes with the integration of ordinariness... as it frees me up from being the nail that sticks out and bears the entire weight of the universe. But it's difficult after 25+ years of consciously trying to be an alien and feeling such a strong aversion to all things ordinary and average.

Did you feel called out or something?

Yes, I agree with that assessment.... and I think this difficulty respecting people comes from a lack of appreciation for ordinariness. And it's challenging, I think, because she has a lot of great points about how people tend to use humility to avoid their own greatness... and to try to be "good" whilst sacrificing so much potential. And there's a lot that 90% of people could really benefit from hearing, because people's identity of humility can and does hold them back from their full potential. But for someone like Teal Swan who has such a strong polarization into extraordinariness and such an aversion to ordinariness... it creates this difficulty just relating to people on a common, eye-to-eye level. It's like disliking humanity to the degree that you try to become a special and beautiful alien.

The lack of a maternal incubator probably wouldn't work out well for the babies... as there is likely more to gestation than just the brass tacks physical needs. It's similar to how, if a baby doesn't get physical contact with a parental figure, they will fail to thrive and even die... even if all their other physiological needs are being met (sustenance, warmth, etc.) Think of "lab babies", like the Rhesus monkey experiment... only the human fetuses would be the test subjects. So, I honestly don't think babies will ever be produced in a lab from conception to birth. But if that does happen, I suspect it will only be sought by mothers who either have no other choice... or who are afraid of pregnancy. And it may prove to be unethical anyway for the reasons that I stated above.

I'm also American. And most people here are in Stage Orange. Many are also Blue. And many are also Green. Also, Donald Trump is literally the poster child for Stage Orange. So, that definitely isn't true that we can't get a Stage Orange person elected. And Barack Obama is most certainly Orange with a smattering of Green. And Bush was Blue/Orange. So, we've been all over the map with it. But all these leaders have led in an Orange way. Also... the idea that "society will never be green" is similar to someone 200 years ago saying that human beings will never fly. It seems evident to us, because we're not used to such a world. But things are always changing.

I agree. I wouldn't put a Spiral Dynamics lens on that persay... as it's not really about the paradigms of the people in these countries. It's clearly just empires serving their own interests through acts of warfare. And as long as an empire has Stage Orange weapons of mass destruction and the leaders are adept at dominating within a Stage Orange frame, they can establish dominance even if the society they preside over is heavy Blue. And Israel is part of the same empire coalition as the United States. And it would make sense to me that Israel was established as an ally to prevent the coalescence of an uninterrupted Arab empire. So, I just don't see this as being a situation that can be explained well through Spiral Dynamics as it's just an empire trying to prevent the coalescence and strengthening of a rival empire.

There will always be people who want children. It's just that when people are given free choice over having children, most will choose to have 1-3 children OR no children. That's just part of the nature of general human preference. But in a world without contraception, sex education, or female sovereignty, people end up having way more children than they prefer. And this is necessary for the population expansion that happens between Stage Beige and Stage Orange. But that which goes up must come down. And expansion isn't always good... nor is contraction always bad. It's just the Yin and Yang of things. So, sometimes the population flows... and sometimes it ebbs. That's the way of the development of our species. And right now the population MUST start dropping or we will render the Earth unlivable. And in this sense the issue of Climate Change will somewhat fix itself as the human population contracts over the course of the coming generations. And it seems to me that the population drop is just nature playing itself out through us... as we are also part of natures feedback systems. Now, of course, there will be challenges in dealing with such a contraction.... just as there were challenges in dealing with population expansion. But to me, the birthrate dropping just feels like a natural part of human development once we start cracking more and more into Stage Green. We just don't think about the human collective as being a part of nature. So, we don't get surprised when manatees collectively migrate for the winter. Nor do we get surprised that certain nut trees collectively produce nuts only every few years. Yet, we feel that the human species as a collective are exempt from being a force of nature that goes through unconscious species-wides cycles that vary in terms of timelines.... as we feel separate from all that. But consider that the contraction of the human population is a necessary feedback loop that arises when the human collective starts to develop in ways that could become cancerous and overgrown... leading to ecological problems and potentially impediments to the ability of the "hive of humanity" to survive.

This statement got me thinking about something with regard to patterns with Teal Swan... as I've been watching her channel for like a decade now. And it is a shame as she does seem to struggle with surrender.... yet very much prefers a more polarized (man dominant - woman submissive) dynamic in her relationships. She seems to obsessively look for it, even.... like a bit too fixated. It's like one of the main hang-ups she seems to talk about in her work. I think her biggest impediment to the type of relationship that she wants is because she's too polarized into Yang qualities like strength, capability, extraordinariness, divergence, greatness, etc. And she's not very well integrated with Yin qualities like vulnerability, limitation, ordinariness, commonality, humility, etc. (this is also the reason why she draws so much ire from the general public) And it's the Yin qualities that one must integrate to be "submissive" in a relationship... but beyond that, those are also the same qualities that one requires to have a human-to-human connection with anyone, even in just a friendship capacity. Even men who are resistant to those Yin qualities will struggle with connection, as polarization into extraordinariness creates a feeling of alienation... and of being outside of nature. So, this set my mind in motion a bit... It could even be that the level of intensity of her desires for submission could come from her lack of integration with ordinariness... and a conscious rejection of humility (as she consciously sees humility as an unquestionably negative thing). So, she goes looking for that through the outlet of a romantic relationship. But of course, none of those romantic relationships suffice because it's a reflection of her own repressed desires for commonality and humility. But she seems to have this impression that, if she can find the "right" man, she can experience the Yin experiences she longs for. And that requires a lot of humbling experiences to be receptive to.... which she is always experiencing a lot of and is resistant to.

Yes, that describes him well. It's ether that his emotions and bitterness holds him back from applying his intelligence to more constructive things. Or he's a really sincere-sounding grifter who knows how to construct narratives that are soothing to men with insecurities about dating and relationships.

I still don't see how your post correlates with what I said. Are you saying that the sex workers that I was reading about a decade ago were lying about some of their Johns treating them like therapists? Or are you saying something else?

I've seen a few of this guy's videos, and they really just exist as a hug box for men who are insecure in dating/relationships. His formula is basically this... "Here's an explanation of how men have all the power and how women are inherently powerless compared to men. And men are blameless... while women are to blame because of character flaws that are baked into their nature. And women are wisest to just settle for what they can get because they're powerless, and if they don't realize this they will die old and alone as cat ladies... and they'll deserve it." And he frames this as general advice towards men and women. But in actuality, the target audience is 99% insecure guys who feel soothed by these narratives as it gives them a scapegoat to put the responsibility for their dating problems onto. But it just holds them back from taking personal responsibility for their dating/relationship issues... and paralyzed in a state of cold comfort that "at least women will get their comeuppance."

That answers my question. It's a scarcity mindset thing.

What is this in reference to?

That tracks with some of the anecdotes that I was reading. Some of the stories that I heard were of men calling up at the phone sex hotline, not to talk about anything sexual... but just to talk about their pain and grief. So, I could totally see a guy trying to get that for free from a courtesan.

I thought you guys were talking about sex workers for some reason, and I forget why. Well, at any rate... it was a fun fact!

I have noticed the same thing. I suspect this could be just naturally the way men are, generally speaking. But I'm sure that cultural norms have a lot to do with it... as sex and fighting/anger are framed as the only 'manly' options for emotional expression and catharsis.

I was just asking you why you prepare yourself to date immature women... and whether it's preference or scarcity thinking. Personally, I haven't found it difficult to find mature men or women. They do exist... in spades. So, in my mind, I wanted to know why you're preparing yourself to date immature women... when you could just raise your standards and sort those women from consideration. Sure, someone could always fall in love with an immature person. That could happen to anyone. But my question is more along the lines of why you made the earlier statement around expecting to date immature women and planning and preparing as such. To me, it just came across as an indicator of scarcity mindset and preemptively not sorting out immature women from your dating pool... or as an indicator of a preference to date immature women.