Emerald

That does make sense that you'd attract Puellas if that's the case. But the advice still stands to be careful with much older partners (especially immature ones), as it's easy for young people to be taken advantage of or controlled by older partners. Or even if not deliberately, being with a much older partner can cause you to skip out on the developmental phases characteristic of people in their 20s... which also wouldn't be good.

I was just thinking about how, according to the video, women statistically go for more hyper-Masculine guys if they're hooking up and having one night stands.... and I had mentioned earlier to someone that perhaps more promiscuous women who value one-night stands tend to go for more hyper-Masculine guys. But most women aren't that motivated towards short-term hook-ups and don't value them much.... even if they have them from time to time. And that's because these experiences focus far more of the physical experience of sex rather than the emotional experience of sex... which just isn't as interesting for most women, as women are mostly motivated towards sex for the sake of emotional stimulation. There's just so much more emotional stimulation from being with a guy you have a deeper relationship with where you can experience a far greater range of erotic emotions flowing through you. To give an analogy, let's say women are like stoners. And more most women are like really discerning stoners who 99% of the time won't even get high unless the weed is some special strain of it as she is aiming to have a very specific kind of high that's way out of this world. But some stoners just enjoy the act of smoking weed and are focused on the act of smoking the weed itself and are less interested in experiencing the high that comes with smoking the weed. So, they're willing to smoke dirt weed even if it doesn't get them that high because they just like smoking weed regardless of how "meh" the high feeling is. They just enjoy smoking... or perhaps they can't quite connect to the high feeling of the former group. Women who have a strong attraction to averagely Masculine guys are more geared towards the former... which represents the more profound levels of emotional stimulation associated with a deeply intimate sexual dynamic... and will tend to pine for guys who seem like better longterm partners who they can envision having those deeply intimate emotional dynamics with. And perhaps, if more promiscuous women are women that enjoy the physicality of sex more than the emotionality, they might be more drawn to more hyper-Masculine guys who are more likely to have a lot of physical prowess and would themselves be more focused on the physical elements of sex.

But the original video is about women preferring a guy with a more averagely strong looking build versus his more shredded after picture. He doesn't have an Arnold build. But he's worked to make himself more shredded. And it's the difference between what men find aesthetically pleasing about men versus what women find aesthetically pleasing about men. And men tend to find more shredded and jacked men more aesthetically pleasing, and assume that's what women like. But women tend to find men who look strong in a more lean or average body more pleasing.

You can learn all those things. But you can't change your level of Masculinity as the Masculine and Feminine are more innate to the person and are baked right into the personality.

A regular guy is a guy with an average level of Masculinity with either a lean but strong body type... or a more average but strong body type. And it's a guy who's got a mixture of Masculine and Feminine qualities. At its most attractive, think of a Hollywood heartthrob guy who's like Ryan Gosling or Brad Pitt or Timothee Chalamet or someone like that who aren't hyper-Masculine but are Masculine with some softer qualities. And in its more average expression, it's most men that exist on the planet. The "alpha" guy is a super jacked and shredded guy who's hyper-Masculine and doesn't have much softness to him. Think of guys with a physique like Dwayne Johnson or Arnold Schwarzenegger... but minus the warmth of personality. And it's men who tend to have smaller eyes, more angular faces, and a lower body-fat percentage. And these are men who tend to have a more stoic and domineering way of coming across.

I'm not an outlier. You just don't understand how women actually operate. Just look at the data... and you will see that women don't prefer hyper-Masculine guys. Men prefer hyper-Masculine guys and find them more attractive. But women tend to prefer men who are Masculine but not in an extreme way. This is also why Hollywood heartthrobs are more like Brad Pitt types rather than Dwayne Johnson types. Here's some videos that reflect this...

Because they have social status. I mean regular guys in terms of level of Masculinity and muscularity... not in level of social status. Plenty of musicians and club promoters are not hyper-Masculine guys. Some musicians are quite sensitive and Feminine. But they get a lot of female attention because of their talents or status. Also, regular guys have women in situationships all the time. That's not reserved for hyper-Masculine guys... just low-investment guys. Also, the CEO guy in the example is attractive to women because he's tall and he's a CEO... and probably has a strong looking body... not necessarily a hyper-Masculine one. Usually when I think of the successful CEO type, he looks more like Patrick Bateman than he looks like He-Man. Plus, it's on a dating site... so the women only have photos and information to go off of. They can't vet for vibes.

You should price for how much value that your customer will get from your work... not for the time you've spent. I would just specify in the future that your process will involve AI and will be a shorter window of time to get completed, that way there's transparency. But if the client is getting the same results, but it took you a shorter period of time to create it, there is no issue there. In fact, it's more valuable to get it to them quicker.

But it's not just that "focusing" on the unfairness is a losing mindset. It's believing in the narratives you've proposed in the first place that will be your own downfall because it so thoroughly misunderstands how women as a group tend to operate. And this misinterpretation of women's nature will create bitterness in you and repel women who would prefer you.

You're welcome.

No, most women just prefer regular guys. Period. This is a goofy mindset that will keep you lonely if you keep thinking this way. You will be offended when a woman is genuinely attracted to you because "clearly she's been ran through by alphas to be settling for me." And you will be grumbling about a woman not letting you cheat because "If she was with the alpha, she'd let him cheat all he wants." It's unrealistic, and it's a losing mindset.

I don't know about that as a generality. My standards are a lot higher than they were in my early 20s because I've been around the block. And I've observed that that describes most women who are 30+. And all my female friends' standards for their partners have gone up as they've matured. Like, when I was 18-20... I could be attracted to guys who had very little going for them if they had long hair, smoked weed, and were in a band as that was the lifestyle that I wanted in my teens and early 20s. All that was necessary were some common interests in music or in clothing style. Nowadays, that would not fly at all... and I would find that quite repulsive. Yet again, an older woman who's interested in very young men might be particularly immature herself like a Puella Aeternus. So, I don't doubt that they exist and that you might be approached by them, as there are immature people who exist. And I know that cougars exist. Not that you seem interested in these older women, I would just say to be careful if you get involved with them as that can be really negative for the younger person to be involved with a much older person. Personally, I'm 36, and I couldn't imagine being interested in a guy who's under the age of 30 because they're just not in the same stage of life as I am.

That's what the narrative is that men are getting brainwashed into to increase their insecurities so that they buy more information products from online Masculinity peddlers who want to profit from their insecurities. You seem believe that women are SETTLING for the beta guy after they've had their "fun" with the gigachads. But women actually PREFER the beta guy. No settling necessary.

Yes, Harry Styles is quite attractive because he has a mixture of hard and soft qualities. And you'll find the women's celebrity crushes usually have this hard/soft combo going on because that's what most women prefer. And that Jocko Willink guy is very Masculine and has the characteristic unsexiness to his appearance that most hyper-Masculine guys have. Like, I can't imagine having a tender human moment with him... nor a passionate moment just from looking at his appearance. Of course, he could be a really nice tender guy irl. His unexpressive appearance just suggests otherwise... so he's not appealing at first glance. So, at first blush, he seems to be a low emotional stimulation kind of guy because you wouldn't be able to see any emotions or conflict reflecting in his eyes when sleeping with him. Like a going to bed with a statue.

First off, no man can change his level of Masculinity as it is innate. So, it doesn't matter what is ideal, as everyone is working with what they got... unless they start taking hormones or steroids. I'm just trying to communicate to men that most women don't prefer a hyper-Masculine guy... and more average expressions of Masculinity are plenty attractive to women... even more attractive than hyper-Masculinity is in the eyes of most women. Keep in mind, a lot of these young men believe they have to be Rambo for a woman to actually be interested in them as a person. And that any woman who likes them is just settling for them because she "can't land Rambo". That's the narrative they're feeding men now-a-days. And if you were female, you would know how bullshit they really are as you'd have experienced being hyper-attracted to an average guy, and you wouldn't believe the things you currently believe from the blindspot you're in as a straight man. It's just conflating what men respect about men with what women are attracted to in men, which are two very different things. Hyper-Masculinity just isn't very attractive at all. Not to body shame or personality shame, but it's a little bit repellent. And most women will tell you that. (There are also things that are very Feminine and considered unattractive too... like cellulite.) So, clearly I am not as unusual as you think I am... and the study Dr. K stated in the video backs that up... as do the street interviews of women rating the most attractive male body types. Women aren't as attracted to hyper-Masculine guys as they are guys who have a mixture of hard and soft qualities... and that includes body types. You just don't understand female sexuality as well as you think you do... and you don't really get what women really find appealing about men. And I do mean MOST women. it's a shame too... because you're missing out because the attractive things about Masculinity are a lot more subtle. They whisper and they don't scream. And they come across when the man is just being himself, comfortable in his own skin, and isn't even trying to be particularly manly. Imagine women at large were under the impression that they had to garishly exaggerate their Femininity to the degree that they made themselves less attractive. Like if 90% of women thought they needed to look like the lady in the image below to be interesting to men. Then, you tried to tell women (of varying levels of attractiveness) that they don't need to exaggerate their Femininity to the highest degree to be attractive to men, and they said, "No way. That is the very best way to get lots of men interested in sleeping you is to exaggerate your Femininity as much as possible." And you'd be like, "Sure. If that's what you want." But you said so yourself that that isn't what you want... and that you're looking for one partner. And while most men would like to have a promiscuous phase, most men would also eventually like to have women see them as longterm relationship material and don't want to come across like a raging fuckboy on steroids... which most discerning women will filter out of consideration, not just because it's not good... but because it's not very attractive or appealing either. Long story short, Masculinity is most intriguing when it's subtle and unpretended... and when the fierceness of it is mixed with human tenderness enough to where you can actually connect to it intimately.

I said most... not all.

I'm just using the language that Dr. K is using. I know that alpha and beta isn't primarily about physical appearance. But many men believe they have to be these hyper-Masculine alpha-looking guys who are ripped with a 6-pack to have women interested in them. It seems that lots of young men have really internalized the notion that women are preferring the most Masculine guys... and the more Masculine the better. But too much Masculinity tends to decrease the attractiveness of a man in the eyes of most women. And that just isn't the case because very few women prefer the appearance of hyper-Masculine guys... and prefer men with more averagely strong or lean body-types. And also women tend to prefer a mixture of Masculine and Feminine features on a man. Also, "alpha"/player guys don't even give off appealing vibes.... in my opinion. They usually give off sleazy used car salesman vibes... and most women learn this by high school. I've noticed that it's mostly women who have some self-esteem issues that go for them... probably because it mirrors some childhood abandonment or insecure attachment dynamic and makes these men attractive to them.

@UpperMaster That could have played a role for her... the common demographic background. But honestly, it's about the chemistry and the human-to-human connection... and commonality of any kind just helps with that.

I preferred this when I was 20 as well.

Personally, I understand. As someone with a really strong life-purpose myself that I'm working on daily, I need a partner who's not quite as married to their work as I am. So, I know that guys who have a strong life-purpose are not someone that I'd be a good match to because it's more likely to put me in a wishbone situation, where either he or I will have to sacrifice investment in our purpose for the others' purpose if they end up bringing us in opposite directions. It's much better to have a dynamic where both support the household, but that one isn't as purpose-driven as the other. But that's just what I need for my personal relationship dynamic, given the fact that I am a very purpose-driven person and cannot be otherwise without massive amounts of unhappiness and depression. I've been that way since I was about 5 years old, where I'm always aiming for some greater future trajectory which provides a sense that I'm living a meaningful story. It is a bit more common that the man be the purpose-driven one though. And it makes sense that many purpose-driven men would want a supportive partner who isn's as married to their work. But making your significant other your "purpose" is not the same as seeing your significant other as the prize.

Exactly. It's 100% like that. I remember, when I was 13 or 14, I thought that boys found the skinniest girls attractive. And I would be really jealous of girls I went to school with who were rail-thin. And this was the early 2000s, so all of the pop stars and actress were SUPER skinny. Mind you, I was only like 125 lbs at the time, which is smack in the middle of the range of normal weight for my height. But I was jealous of girls who were like 90-100 lbs. So, I felt a lot of pressure to get as skinny as possible. But then, I heard a lot of boys in my grade saying they liked a bit of meat on the bones and curves. And I saw a survey in some magazine where most guys hadn't rated the skinniest woman as the most attractive. So, knowing this enabled me to start leaning into my weight and appreciating my body type.

Why? It's a lot more forgiving than what men tend to believe women want.

I am thinking about it in terms of how it would be to be physical with him (cuddling and otherwise) when making that consideration. And the fleshiness is more inviting than the hardness. It just feels like you can physically connect more if a guy has a layer of fat over the muscle.

No... there really is a PREFERENCE for the "betas". And women just tend to respond better to guys with a strong but not ripped look. Bearing in mind, these are very young women so they're probably going to like the lean look... as that's very laddish and might resemble their male peers more. So, if they were a bit older, they might tend to prefer the dad bod. I personally prefer the dad bod... but would have preferred the leaner body as a younger woman. But notice how very few women choose the ripped body.

Not the same guy. But yes, I find the guy on the left more attractive than the guy on the right... body-wise and face-wise.