Emerald

Absolutely. First off, don't be afraid of not finding your way back. This is impossible. In this way, OBE works like a dream even though it feels very different. You just snap right back into yourself, similar to how you would wake up. You don't have to backtrack or anything like that. It's instantaneous. Chances are you will have the opposite problem of not being able to stay out of body. This is what I struggle with, if I get too excited, rigid, etc. Sometimes I'll accidentally move my actual body when trying to get up and will completely waste my OBE experience. Now, there is a chance that you'll run into creepy things during OBE and Sleep Paralysis. This will happen when you go into the experience afraid or feeling uneasy. I've had a bunch of these types of experiences. They aren't fun... but they're fun to talk about later on. I mostly ran into these unpleasant experiences as a result of being afraid, thinking that I snapped myself out of the experience, and then getting up and out of the room that I'm sleeping in. I would be thinking that I'm heading to the refrigerator to get something to eat or to turn on the TV to distract myself from the experience and then Screamfest 2016! Very few times did my scary experiences happen when I was conscious of having an OBE. It was almost always by accident. My recommendation for avoiding scary experiences is to not attempt to leave your body from the Sleep Paralysis state when you feel scared or uneasy. About half the time when I get Sleep Paralysis, I feel uncomfortable so I just snap myself out of it by moving the small muscles in my abdomen. You can also try to move your fingers and toes. Most of the time, I can get back to sleep without the high pitched buzzing noise and paralysis coming back. I also keep my eyes closed during this time. What you can't see, can't scare you. But if you're scared, go back to sleep and don't try to get up and leave the room as you will likely be out of body and not realize it. One time when I did this, I encountered a large man made entirely out of twisted up long black braided screws. No face or features... just mangled up long black screws. If you feel comfortable enough to open your eyes and look around the room during Sleep Paralysis, this is a sign that your experience will likely be more pleasant. But if there is any ounce of fear or uneasiness, just snap yourself out of it. But remember that moving small muscles will help you get out of it very quickly. This next bit might scare you even more but situations like this have come up for me a few times before. Remember not to interact with friends or family members after experiencing sleep paralysis if their personality or life details seem off to you. Let them know that you realize that it isn't them. About a year and half ago, I had an experience where my mother had gotten home from work in the middle of the night. I started talking to her like normal but realized a few seconds later that my mom neither works in the middle of the night nor lives with me. So, as soon as "my mom" realized that I figured it out, it floated sidelong into the other bedroom while maintaining empty eye-contact with me the whole time. Creepy stuff. But these types of situations happen a lot less frequently now. The more that I learn and the more positive that I am, less comes up for me that's scary. So, in waking life try practicing positive focus and other activities to improve your emotional state. Also, there are many New Age based ideas about "raising your frequency" that are said to help avoid such entities... the idea here is that a high frequency being can't share a space with a low frequency being. I haven't tried many of them, so I would experiment and see what works for you. Also, daytime out of body experiences are a lot less scary. So, you can try to induce them in the middle of the daytime too. I hope this was helpful. Wishing you happy travels.

I've always had mixed impressions of Teal Swan. On one hand, she's really intelligent and super helpful. On the other hand, there is something about her persona that makes me a bit uncomfortable. I don't think it has to do with her background or anything. I think it's more of a shadow thing on my part. Like I've repressed traits that she has... or something of that nature. I'm hoping that I can help people with the content I put out. To be honest, at this point, aspiring to be a spiritual teacher feels a bit out of reach from where I presently am. But I can't deny that it felt really good to hear Teal Swan say that it was my life purpose. I have had the idea in the back of my head since I was 12. Thanks again!

It was a lot of fun. Mooji seems like a very loving person. I'm sure that would be a great experience.

Hi! I wrote a blog about my experiences. I also shot a video review about the workshop itself. When I post it, I'll put it on this thread as well. Conversations with Teal Swan: Fear and Decision Making So, over the weekend, I went to one of Teal Swan’s synchronization workshops in Orlando. It was my first time going to see her and it was a really awesome experience. If you get the chance, I highly recommend it. (Conversation with Teal Swan and I regarding Out of Body Experiences after the synchronization workshop in Orlando.) In the past, I’ve had a bit of a resistance to New Age spirituality or anything too much on the metaphysical side. So, when I first saw her videos about two years ago, I had a strong attraction/aversion reaction. But I pushed through it and continued watching her videos (albeit with the lights out and the blinds shut. J/K), which mostly offer psychological and spiritual help through the metaphysical lens. It was SOOO helpful for me, that I truly credit her work for helping me get through one of toughest times in my life. I probably wouldn’t even be in a place to be bettering myself and making blogs and videos without the clarity that her videos have given me. She really helped me pick myself out of some deep psychological traps that I had been caught up in for years, due to a lack of deep understanding. Despite this, to say that I don’t still have a lot of fear relative to New Age spirituality would be untrue. So, if I look at that under a microscope, what do I find? Am I actually averse to New Age spirituality itself… No. I’m afraid of the social stigma associated with being seen as ‘Woo Woo’ or gullible. The truth of the matter is that I really love the idea that there is more to this reality than what it appears at face value. I’ve always, since childhood, had an attraction to anything magical. It is only my social persona that I’m watching out for. I also have Out of Body Experiences, that I try to stay open minded and closed mouthed about in daily life. So, when I met with Teal Swan in person after the workshop, I asked her a question about an Out of Body Experience that I had had with her in it about two months prior that I wrote about in an earlier blog. (It's my blog from January 18th if you want to check it out.) I asked her if it was really her that I was seeing or simply a thought projection that I internally projected upon my experience. She said that it was indeed her, and that we had met Out of Body about 25 times prior over the course of the past two years. She said that I had come here for a similar purpose to why she came here: to be a spiritual teacher. So, I felt intensely happy to be validated in that way, but then immediately deflated because I didn’t want to feel gullible and I certainly didn’t want other people to think that of ME. It’s all ego. My egoic fear sapped me of my joy once again. It’s a huge problem. I like to pay a lot of lip service to being radically open minded, but I have a lot of issues with this when it comes to my reputation. I like to be able to think that I can hold space for contradictory opinions or different viewpoints on reality without clinging to beliefs in either direction. My policy is to neither believe nor disbelieve something, if I don’t have a firsthand experience of it in the present moment. But my ego gets in the way of this, and always wants me to fit and acquiesce to the social situation at hand, nullifying my unique perspective and connection to my wisdom. It’s hard to shake free of this tendency to try to sell myself to others. So, the next day, I went to one of the local parks in Orlando to meet up with the volunteers who worked at the event as well as a few other attendees at the workshop. I was pleasantly surprised to see Teal there too. And I spent about two hours with her and about 15 other people... (and got a pretty gnarly sunburn on my arms). Everyone there was really nice and open minded. Normally, I feel that I have to keep myself to myself to fit in, but there was no such issue here. (Volunteer Potluck at Clear Lake Park with Teal Swan. I am the one with the purple shirt) But then a conversation came up where I was the odd man out: vaccines. I got both of my kids vaccinated. But it didn’t feel good given my older sister’s allergic reaction to the Pertussis in the DTP shot back in 1974. She had petite mal seizures which left her with many developmental delays. In many ways she has the personality and interests of an 8 year old and she has to live with my mother to this day. So, I did a lot of research on vaccines from the establishment and from those against the establishment. Both explanations made sense to me logically and rationally. Ultimately, I decided that not getting them vaccinated would feel even worse to me. I’d rather my children risk being mentally challenged than risk them being sick with a fatal disease. My sister is at least happy. If I could have chosen to both vaccinate and not vaccinate at the same time, I would have. But of course, this isn’t possible. A decision had to be made. So, I decided to do all the vaccines except the Pertussis. This always to me felt like a game of Russian Roulette during that time. Both options felt like a huge risk, with my kids’ futures at stake. Plus, some of the nurses at the Health Department and at my regular doctor's office got super judgmental and invalidating, which was very painful to me. They were denying that my sisters seizures were caused by the vaccines, which is just untrue. They happened directly after the vaccines and it even says on the American Academy of Pediatrics website that this is a rare but possible side effect. But I digress... Now, Teal Swan is a huge opponent of vaccines, and I was fangirling out so I wanted her to like me. I didn’t want to make a bad impression. So, I was tempted to do the same type of social survival that I would normally engage in with the more mainstream social group. I was tempted to keep myself to myself. But given Teal’s ideology on authenticity I decided to be honest, and ask a question to Teal that had been on my mind before many times in the past and to use the vaccine topic as an example and springboard for that. I told her that I decided to vaccinate, but wanted to know how to discern between two binary options when both sides seem wrong to you emotionally but both sides seem right to you rationally. I would either have to exercise faith in the medical establishment or exercise faith in the anti-establishment. Neither of which do I have much faith in… I’m a bit of an iconoclast in that way. Both would certainly be biased by their own ideologies. So, it’s always going to be basing a decision on second-hand information. She recommended to me relative to vaccines to get the vaccines myself prior to giving my kids the vaccines, so that I could experience my personal physiological reactions to them. Then make my decision from there. I found this to be sound advice, although my kids have already gotten almost all of their vaccines that they will ever have to get. I don’t plan on having any more kids, but if I do, I’ll definitely consider this as an option. But later she gave me the answer to let go of fear relative to the issue, whether it be vaccines or any other issues where I’m caught between a rock and a hard place. Essentially, both options for me involved huge amounts of fear… especially with my sister’s reaction. So, I think that for me, this has been a major issue throughout the course of my life. Fear is always in the background for me, subtly lurking there and blocking me off from my innate wisdom. It is the only thing that keeps me back from happiness, joy, love, and all the other positive emotions. It is the thing that makes me deny what is most natural to me and what really feels authentic to me. It’s like all the best food and drink is ruined by a subtle nasty after-taste that won’t go away. The only time I ever got clarity was during my two ego-transcendence experiences where there was no separate me to actually protect. So, there was no fear and wisdom naturally came to me. There was no such thing as an unwise decision. I would imagine that I’d know which option truly felt right to me, if I could just get that clarity and drop away my fear. I’m sure that I would embrace whatever was of interest to me too, and I would never worry about what others would think because there really isn’t any value in that in the first place.

I see. I do often talk about my experiences. They are my only frame of reference, and they are safe for the ego. I think I'm a lot like a kid trying to avoid sleep by asking for a drink of water in that way. I sidetrack myself through intellectual bypassing. But I suspect that there are similarities and differences between what I experienced and living in the enlightened paradigm. More obviously, I wouldn't be experiencing a body-high and hallucinations in daily life. This was purely the effect of the drug. But I suspect that the letting go of neuroses and fears aspect would be part of it, which is what I really want at the end of the day. I want to really live and not just strive and sacrifice for the imaginary friend that I call Emerald.

No worries. I appreciate bluntness, even if it stings the ego a bit. I suspect there's a great deal of subtle posturing that I do every time I engage in conversations about enlightenment to paint myself in a positive light. By the way, what is your background? How did you become enlightened?

I've read about half of it and it's great. They even reference it through the Eastern idea of Dharma, which is basically your life purpose. So, if you're centered in your Dharma, it becomes best to practice it with a warriors resolve and be un-swayed by the opinions of others.

Be kind but also be firm in your boundaries. Say no often. Stick to your guns. Show yourself love and respect. Don't self-sacrifice.

No. I would say that he's intellectually familiar with many of the philosophies in New Age spirituality. But his ego is quite strong and he has a lot of neurotic tendencies.

I would cherry-pick advice from it, when it's applicable and helpful. But to swallow it whole would be absolutely horrible and unnecessary. I have it too. It's great for people-pleasers and understanding how cut-throat people and powerful people often operate. But in my opinion, exorbitant amounts of power are unnecessary. A little bit goes a long way.

That's true. I'm personally very attached to these experiences because they were so pivotal for me. I currently live under the illusion of ego, but these experiences were a small taste of non-duality that changed the course of my life. So, in many ways, it's just another ego game and getting to feel understood when (prior to conversing with others who have had similar experiences) no one else in life gets it. But it is likely an outgrowth of more self-lies, distraction, clinging to dogmas and frameworks, and ego protection. But I'm trying to be mindful. Thank you. Those experiences really changed my life in many ways for the better, even though there were some problematic outcomes of assimilating the memories from the higher state of consciousness back to the lower state of consciousness.

I didn't continue with the drug because it was very apparent while under the effect of it that I didn't need the drug to be in that state of consciousness. I knew that it was better to develop higher consciousness naturally, instead of using the substance as a crutch. This insight was a natural outgrowth of being in touch with wisdom which comes from the ability to be honest with oneself in a way that's impossible from the egoic mindset. The only reason why I did it one more time after the first was because my life was in dire straights and I wanted an escape and to get clarity about the situation. Prior to trying Ayahuasca, I used to smoke Marijuana on a regular basis from the time I was 13 to the time I was 20. When I tried the Ayahuasca and my separate identity dissolved, I realized that I never enjoyed Marijuana or the drugish lifestyle but that I was lying to myself and using it as an identity enhancer to fit a particular persona. I thought doing drugs was part of what made me interesting and therefore significant. I imagined myself with a chaotic life that was more of a work of art, like Hunter S. Thompson or someone like that. Prior to my non-dual experiences, I lived my life as though someone were making a movie of it. I would invite a lot of chaos into my life for the sake of making a more interesting life story. I was really interested in creating a legacy to help me run from the reaper. Ironically, this is what lead me to try the Ayahuasca. I wasn't looking for a transcendental experience when I first tried it. I was practically an atheist and hyper-rational. I just wanted another novel experience to add value and interest to my life-story. But what I got was so much more than I bargained for, and I saw through my many pretenses that I had been completely unconscious to prior to that. I realized that my striving and struggling against death was making me neurotic and causing me to suffer every single moment of my life. So, I quit clinging to that drugee identity afterward, and all drugs and my desire to do them naturally fell out of my life. I haven't done any drugs for over six years now. So, ironically enough, Ayahuasca was my anti-drug.

If you are enlightened, then I think you semantically misunderstand what I mean when I use the word perfection. But I never tried mushrooms. I was experimenting recreationally with Ayahuasca and it catalyzed an experience where I no longer identified with my self-concept, felt connected and inseparable from all of existence, all neuroses fell away, there was no fear even of death (in fact death became beautiful to me), traits and truths that I had long repressed came to the surface, I was more conscious of my emotions because I was allowing them, and I recognized the inherent perfection and completeness in all of existence. I was fully in touch with deep wisdom and no longer needed to seek but had a deep knowing of everything internal that I needed to know as a human being: no more and no less. Can you still not see that everything is perfect, despite your enlightenment? Mind you, I'm going from memory as the experiences were not permanent. But it was very apparent to me that everything was perfect... the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Have you ever had an enlightenment experience yourself?

@jjer94 isn't saying to stop helping people. In fact, someone who has woken up will likely be even more altruistic without even having to have an attachment to altruistic beliefs. He's saying that benevolent beliefs and actions won't yield enlightenment, and if not seen for what they are can actually impede enlightenment. Any and all attachments to the particulars of assumptions and beliefs (no matter how righteous) will keep you from seeing the truth, because ideas will write over top of reality every time. Beliefs are loud but pure being is almost silent. If beliefs aren't deconstructed, they will get in the way. In order to experience enlightenment you have to see all of reality as it truly is beyond all beliefs, assumptions, and frameworks... including the ones related to the self and being a good person. You must also come to recognize that (despite your preferences toward altruism) that everything is perfect exactly as it is... this is the only way to truly have unconditional love and acceptance for all of existence. These are mandatory conditions for enlightenment. Which means that any "I need to fix..." thought (no matter how altruistic) will set you infinitely apart from waking up to enlightenment. Remember, everything is perfect exactly as it is, if you have the level of consciousness that allows you to perceive the perfection.

For what it's worth, I've had two experiences of dis-identification with my self concept (enlightenment). My level of consciousness was artificially expanded through taking Ayahuasca which made it easy to see how much I had been sacrificing to carry around, exalt, damn, protect, and perserve an empty thought story that I thought was me. Enlightenment is nothing more than a realization that the self-concept is nothing more than a thought story, and as a result a deep realization of the perfection in everything that produces deep feelings of unconditional love and acceptance for all that is.

@jcgiusto Thank you for the notes.

Think about the parable of Indra's Diamond Net. It is a Buddhist metaphor based upon the Hindu God Indra who is said to have an infinitely large net that stretches on forever in every direction. At each of the intersection points of the net, is a jewel. And in this jewel reflects all the other jewels in the net which are also infinite in number. So, there is both only one jewel and an infinite number of jewels at the same time. This is meant to demonstrate an answer to the question that you just asked, to show the possible perspectives that you can flip between when doing self-inquiry. You can entertain the notion that you are only one small jewel in the infinite net. You can also entertain the notion that you are the only jewel in the net that reflects all the other jewels. Notice how neither of these answers can ever be conclusive. This type of contemplation can help you deconstruct your taken for granted notions about the self and reality.

Thank you. Being in touch with the true nature is truly the only way to let go of fear too. So, that makes a lot of sense. I'll let you know what I think of the videos in a little while.

@Ayla @Ludwig - My newest blog about my experience meeting Teal Swan at her most recent synchronization workshops in Orlando. I saw on the other message board that you both had been positively impacted by her work. New Blog Post: http://www.thediamondnet.org/blog/2016/4/4/conversations-with-teal-swan-fear-and-decision-making Conversations with Teal Swan: Fear and Decision Making So, over the weekend, I went to one of Teal Swan’s synchronization workshops in Orlando. It was my first time going to see her and it was a really awesome experience. If you get the chance, I highly recommend it. Teal Swan and I after the Orlando Synchronization Workshop. In the past, I’ve had a bit of a resistance to New Age spirituality or anything too much on the metaphysical side. So, when I first saw her videos about two years ago, I had a strong attraction/aversion reaction. But I pushed through it and continued watching her videos (albeit with the lights out and the blinds shut. J/K), which mostly offer psychological and spiritual help through the metaphysical lens. It was SOOO helpful for me, that I truly credit her work for helping me get through one of toughest times in my life. I probably wouldn’t even be in a place to be bettering myself and making blogs and videos without the clarity that her videos have given me. She really helped me pick myself out of some deep psychological traps that I had been caught up in for years, due to a lack of deep understanding. Despite this, to say that I don’t still have a lot of fear relative to New Age spirituality would be untrue. So, if I look at that under a microscope, what do I find? Am I actually averse to New Age spirituality itself… No. I’m afraid of the social stigma associated with being seen as ‘Woo Woo’ or gullible. The truth of the matter is that I really love the idea that there is more to this reality than what it appears at face value. I’ve always, since childhood, had an attraction to anything magical. It is only my social persona that I’m watching out for. I also have Out of Body Experiences, that I try to stay open minded and closed mouthed about in daily life. So, when I met with Teal Swan in person after the workshop, I asked her a question about an Out of Body Experience that I had had with her in it about two months prior that I wrote about in an earlier blog. (It's my blog from January 18th if you want to check it out.) I asked her if it was really her that I was seeing or simply a thought projection that I internally projected upon my experience. She said that it was indeed her, and that we had met Out of Body about 25 times prior over the course of the past two years. She said that I had come here for a similar purpose to why she came here: to be a spiritual teacher. So, I felt intensely happy to be validated in that way, but then immediately deflated because I didn’t want to feel gullible and I certainly didn’t want other people to think that of ME. It’s all ego. My egoic fear sapped me of my joy once again. It’s a huge problem. I like to pay a lot of lip service to being radically open minded, but I have a lot of issues with this when it comes to my reputation. I like to be able to think that I can hold space for contradictory opinions or different viewpoints on reality without clinging to beliefs in either direction. My policy is to neither believe nor disbelieve something, if I don’t have a firsthand experience of it in the present moment. But my ego gets in the way of this, and always wants me to fit and acquiesce to the social situation at hand, nullifying my unique perspective and connection to my wisdom. It’s hard to shake free of this tendency to try to sell myself to others. So, the next day, I went to one of the local parks in Orlando to meet up with the volunteers who worked at the event as well as a few other attendees at the workshop. I was pleasantly surprised to see Teal there too. And I spent about two hours with her and about 15 other people... (and got a pretty gnarly sunburn on my arms). Everyone there was really nice and open minded. Normally, I feel that I have to keep myself to myself to fit in, but there was no such issue here. But then a conversation came up where I was the odd man out: vaccines. I got both of my kids vaccinated. But it didn’t feel good given my older sister’s allergic reaction to the Pertussis in the DTP shot back in 1974. She had petite mal seizures which left her with many developmental delays. In many ways she has the personality and interests of an 8 year old and she has to live with my mother to this day. So, I did a lot of research on vaccines from the establishment and from those against the establishment. Both explanations made sense to me logically and rationally. Ultimately, I decided that not getting them vaccinated would feel even worse to me. I’d rather my children risk being mentally challenged than risk them being sick with a fatal disease. My sister is at least happy. If I could have chosen to both vaccinate and not vaccinate at the same time, I would have. But of course, this isn’t possible. A decision had to be made. So, I decided to do all the vaccines except the Pertussis. This always to me felt like a game of Russian Roulette during that time. Both options felt like a huge risk, with my kids’ futures at stake. Plus, some of the nurses at the Health Department and at my regular doctor's office got super judgmental and invalidating, which was very painful to me. They were denying that my sisters seizures were caused by the vaccines, which is just untrue. They happened directly after the vaccines and it even says on the American Academy of Pediatrics website that this is a rare but possible side effect. But I digress... Now, Teal Swan is a huge opponent of vaccines, and I was fangirling out so I wanted her to like me. I didn’t want to make a bad impression. So, I was tempted to do the same type of social survival that I would normally engage in with the more mainstream social group. I was tempted to keep myself to myself. But given Teal’s ideology on authenticity I decided to be honest, and ask a question to Teal that had been on my mind before many times in the past and to use the vaccine topic as an example and springboard for that. I told her that I decided to vaccinate, but wanted to know how to discern between two binary options when both sides seem wrong to you emotionally but both sides seem right to you rationally. I would either have to exercise faith in the medical establishment or exercise faith in the anti-establishment. Neither of which do I have much faith in… I’m a bit of an iconoclast in that way. Both would certainly be biased by their own ideologies. So, it’s always going to be basing a decision on second-hand information. She recommended to me relative to vaccines to get the vaccines myself prior to giving my kids the vaccines, so that I could experience my personal physiological reactions to them. Then make my decision from there. I found this to be sound advice, although my kids have already gotten almost all of their vaccines that they will ever have to get. I don’t plan on having any more kids, but if I do, I’ll definitely consider this as an option. But later she gave me the answer to let go of fear relative to the issue, whether it be vaccines or any other issues where I’m caught between a rock and a hard place. Essentially, both options for me involved huge amounts of fear… especially with my sister’s reaction. So, I think that for me, this has been a major issue throughout the course of my life. Fear is always in the background for me, subtly lurking there and blocking me off from my innate wisdom. It is the only thing that keeps me back from happiness, joy, love, and all the other positive emotions. It is the thing that makes me deny what is most natural to me and what really feels authentic to me. It’s like all the best food and drink is ruined by a subtle nasty after-taste that won’t go away. The only time I ever got clarity was during my two ego-transcendence experiences where there was no separate me to actually protect. So, there was no fear and wisdom naturally came to me. There was no such thing as an unwise decision. I would imagine that I’d know which option truly felt right to me, if I could just get that clarity and drop away my fear. I’m sure that I would embrace whatever was of interest to me too, and I would never worry about what others would think because there really isn’t any value in that in the first place.

Thanks! Your words are very encouraging to me. I do fall off the wagon a lot, but I'm pretty tenacious when it comes to getting back on track. I'm hoping that over time, I can train myself to stay on top of things without getting off course as often.

I haven't read "The One Thing" but I happened across some videos. Here are a few of them:

These are habits that have a ripple effect through other areas of life. For example, if you focus on creating good habits for the three physiological fundamentals (nutrition, exercise, and sleep) it will positively effect the rest of your habits throughout the day. I have been having increased productivity ever sine I started my 66 day challenge, even though I fell of the wagon this weekend.

How can something infinite be truly all-knowing when it has never experienced the finite? But this is just a rationalization. Take it with a grain of salt.

I got knocked off track with my trip to Orlando this weekend. I got a lot out of this weekend, and it was a ton of fun but I have to start my Keystone Habits 66 day challenge over again, if I want to really solidify the habits. So, I'm back at day 1 starting tomorrow. Keystone Habits- Wake up at 6 am Keep a Food Journal with calories and weight included Exercise 15 minutes or more each day (Also, at least 1 minute of meditation daily... but with a goal of 30 or more minutes)