phoenix666

wow. I would like to. have you tried? is it that simple? does it work?

Isn't that a very good sign? You apparently tapped into a hornet's nest. Now you have to face the defense mechanisms the ego is 'sending'

wow, love this. I think this was one of my bigger insights during the last shroom trip. It was kind of hard for me to formulate the insight. I had this deep struggle within, it kept choking me and I kept looking, seeking, doing, thinking and trying to grasp like crazy. then I suddenly realized That I need to let go and so I did. It felt lie such a release. Like struggling up an infinite mountain, reaching the top and then jump down in total bliss and freedom <3 thanks for putting this into words

@Dan Arnautu sounds like you're the perfect strategic motherfucker (cit. Leo) As much I dislike the structure and the way they make you 'learn' things, I am so thankful that I have the opportunity to go to college. (In my country we pay very little money for it) As much as I'm looking forward to start with my dream job, I found out last summer that the college years are in fact the best opportunity to really do a lot of studying. By that I do not mean the stuff you have to learn for your exams, but massive self development work. Whilst I loved doing my first internship last summer, I noticed that with the tight working schedule there is not much room for anything else left. So you really need to build up a solid foundation before you enter the 'working world'. College gives you the opportunity to immerse yourself in research and inner work. Good luck on your way, Anicca

I think all latin derived languages strongly 'relies' on the ego, the separation from 'me' and nature, other beings. and yes, absolutely true. I would even dare to say that thoughts ARE language. mixed with images maybe? It's so difficult to 'think' outside of all those concepts language lies upon our mind. (I don't know if my point comes across, I struggle a little with my english....there you see, language itself can be an obstacle in communication)

Today I had an insight about words and language in general. I was meditating outside beside a river, using the mindfulness technique with the labeling of 'seeing' 'hearing' 'feeling'. Since English is not my native language, I mostly use my mother tongue in my head (or should I say for thinking, just to sound less crazy;)) But the last couple of years I've been watching and reading a lot of content in English. So I sometimes notice myself thinking in English - a quite common phenomenon. Whilst meditating I felt a cold breeze and I caught my mental voice saying 'so cold' in my native dialect. I labelled it 'hearing' and then I tried to savor it by repeating it a couple of times mentally, to bask in the sound of my inner voice. And hearing the sound in this raw dialect made it very easy to detach from the meaning. (I just realized that I mostly use English when I am in a state of higher awareness, interesting). The two words sounded so strange, even foreign. So I completely distanced myself from what the words stand for. I just concentrated on the pure sound. And then it hit me that words are just chosen symbols. conventions. historical? cultural? definitions of things. labels, which by definition are not the thing they refer to. completely arbitrary. yet our world, our society, our relationships, everything works based on that arbitrary, vague chosen construct we call language. Our thinking and rationality also bases on language. this makes it impossible to communicate the Truth. I know, sounds pretty obvious. And surely have been thinking about it before, but I've never seen and felt it so clearly as today. Just wanted to share this insight with you. Thank you for reading if you're still with me.

@Dan Arnautu I really like all your arguments, on point! I guess it really depends on what your life purpose is. I mean, in some cases there is no other possibility. For example if you want to become a doctor. What I mean, is that you can work on your degree with the life purpose on your mind and do the rest additionally. It really depends on what you want to be. @Anicca you have to find out whether you absolutely need a degree for your purpose or not. If so, then don't be discouraged by it. just get through with it and keep your spiritual growth rolling. if not, then @Dan Arnautu is completely right. the important thing is: if you decide to go to college, don't let yourself being sucked into all the dogmas and social conditionings that come with the educational system.

one does not exclude the other student's life can be pretty chill if you want it to be. in your free time you can work on yourself and your life purpose. I am not a big fan of the education system, since it's based on pure knowledge in the sense of learning stuff by heart much like a computer rather than on thinking, creativity and association skills. But we live in a society, specially in western culture, where a college degree opens many doors and leaves people with no classic education very little chance.

@cetus56 that's exactly what came to my mind; reality being beyond mental concepts such as time. Since our thinking is based on language, which is in turn based on all those concepts, it simply is impossible to think our way to the Truth or reality. Leo mentioned it before in some of his videos, but there is a difference between hearing it from someone and experiencing it, that's why I wanted to share it with you @Delinkaaaa I've heard about semantics before, I've always been interested in literature at school and also outside of the educational system. It reminded me a lot of the 'Sprachskepsis' of Wittgenstein and the crises with language some writers like Rainer Maria Rilke and Hugo von Hofmannsthal had at one point of their life. The inability of words to describe emotions. it's an interesting topic, I also noticed that I am emotionally attached/reactive to words.

I often meditate under the sunlight. feeling it on the skin is like being more connected to nature. try to avoid the aggressive sun between 11am and 3pm. like @Prabhaker said, no need to be a masochist. sometimes whilst meditating I feel very strong heat waves coming up. (not only under the sunlight, also when I meditate inside). then I, too, feel my mind getting hyper and distracted. When I try to resist, it only gets worse. When I surrender to the feelings in my body and observe my hyper mind, it gets much better.

@OBEler @Delinkaaaa

that's why religions have failed and turned into mass manipulation machines.

Spices are great! they boost brown adipose tissue, which highly increases your metabolism by burning fat and turning it into heat (a process called thermogenesis). so brown adipose tissue does not only boost your metabolism, but it also makes you more resistant to cold.

Isn't that one of the definitions of enlightenment? so hard to accomplish. I think I am miles away from reaching that. On my last shroom trip I was able to detach myself from my thoughts, just observing my mind from a state of pure awareness. But doing that during a 'normal' meditation session seems impossible, at least for now.

@cetus56 I know, some things are just downright impossible to communicate, one must experience it himself. Let's see where the Now will take me

do you mean whilst doing 'Do nothing' meditation? or also with the mindfulness labeling technique? it sounds fascinating, I have to admit. I'll try tomorrow. It will be quite a challenge, since I've been meditating with my eyes closed for two years now. How do you manage to not get distracted from what you see? Even if I look at a white wall, light patterns and other visible phenomena will still emerge.. and the blinking stresses me out.. I will try tomorrow, thanks for the inspiration!

I think doing it with your eyes open should help keeping you awake. But if falling asleep is not an issue, then you probably can do it with closed eyes as well. I also prefer meditating with my eyes closed. I get distracted by blinking and shifting accommodation

It's so difficult to want to experience something and at the same time to not give a fuck. How do you find the balance between being curious and not caring? @OBEler @Shin

doesn't coffee make you even more stressed? stimulants activate stress response even further and then make you crash again. coffee is a strong stimulant and fast acting. green tea is a bit softer and longer lasting. you could take a thermos bottle filled with tea to work good luck with your improvements!

try replacing coffee with green tea? it worked perfectly for me. (as an italian I was very addicted to espresso I drank 5-6 espressi during the study-periods before my exams) I also discovered matcha powder some weeks ago. It's delicious! and has even more antioxidants than conventional green tea leaves.

@Prabhaker @Leo Gura Thank you very much for the insights and for the advice. This motivates me a lot to even deepen my work. I don't want to run away from it, I actually want to face it. Next time this boredom arises I will look deeper into it, observe when and how it comes and what exactly it is feeling like. Yeah, I became really aware of my addictions lately. I mean, I knew it on a rational level from the theory. But actually feeling it in my bones was new to me. I realized my addiction to thoughts, keeping my mind busy with studying and work. the realization really hit me during my last shroom trip, where I was able to finally let go of all the monkey chatter. I also re-watched the video about the dark sides of meditation and this boredom is probably the ego trying to regain power. the dictator fights back I've been thinking about a solo retreat, specially after the video series on vimeo.. I know it would skyrocket my inner work. it's so difficult to organize with today's busy society, all the social obligations and university. but I will try to organize something the next months. Thank you very much for the help, I feel very motivated and excited about this growth opportunity.

I've been meditating for two years now, (almost) on a daily basis. I already feel some progress. It was extremely difficult for me at the beginning because I am a classic 'thinker'. I was never able to shut down my thoughts and as a teenager I even thought always having a busy mind is a benefit (!). However, it's getting easier to quiet down my monkey mind for a couple of seconds these days. But I noticed a problem: whenever I meditate for a little longer, especially when I go over the 30-40 minutes mark, I find myself getting extremely agitated. I feel such a strong urge to DO something (studying, training, reading, responding to my messages..) and I just feel like I am wasting my time. The strongest emotion that overcomes me then is an extremely deep boredom. Sometimes meditating bores the fucking hell out of me...so strong, that I can't bear it. Does anyone face the same problem? Where does this boredom come from? Is it my addiction to thinking?

you're a nurse? cool then you'll probably be very interested in Dr. Greger's material! Oh, please, don't call me that^^ not yet... couple of years to go.. I wish you good luck on your journey! I am sure that a more plant based diet can make you feel better. I am so disappointed that they give diet and lifestyle so little attention at med school..

Self actualizing can make you very lonely I guess. Leo recently shot a video about this. I lately feel a very strong urge to isolate myself. I've always needed a lot of 'alone-time', but lately it's reaching a whole other level. Even my parents started to ask me why I spend so much time by myself. But they see that I am quite satisfied with my life, so they actually don't worry. they're just curious I guess. Don't let losing some friends stop you from keeping up the good work! It probably means that you're making a lot of progress

I sometimes notice my mind becoming very quiet and calm. In those moments I feel a deep contentment, sometimes there is a hint of fear, but I also feel save at the same time. It's difficult to describe! The moments with no thoughts arising get longer and longer (they are still very short, a couple of seconds). It takes a lot of time and practice. Patience in all things