Max_V

@Ryan_047 Well that's basically what I'm doing. Exploring suffering and internal struggle is the basis of Shadow work. I do this alone and with a psychologist Nofap makes it that much easier to work on this part of my shadow because I'm not numbing down the struggle and pain but actually experiencing and feeling it.

@Ether Yes, no mind feels really good. But notice that you are not in control of your thoughts what so ever. You don't even know what your next thought is going to be. Don't judge meditation sessions as good or bad as to whether or not you were able to silence the mind, this will get you incredibly frustrated because you are trying to control something you have no control over. Meditate just for the experience itself. Just sit in stillness and observe your experience.

It's not really that I'm blindly doing Nofap because it is 'better' in any way. Ofcourse it really has it's benefits. You can google them. For examply more energy, higher testosterone levels in the body; which helps with working out, etc But those are not my reasons why. I do it because I've noticed within myself a lot of loneliness and yearning for love. When I masturbate I temporarily numb that feeling. So the real purpose why I am doing Nofap right now is to be able to solve this yearning for love. This simply isn't possible when I numb this feeling. There has to be exposure to the pain to grow.

@Pebble What is important that you recognize why you are not meditating. Contemplate where those excuses come from. Also find a specific time during your day that you dedicate to meditation. For me I was starting out I had this exact time in my head planned when to go upstairs and when I would be done. That time has stayed the same for almost 2 years. 17:50 If you have any negative reactions to Teal Swan because of the things that have been going around, notice them and try to look past them. I think this is a good video

Well I will share some too then. I have been feeling quite miserable lately. I quit gaming, porn, and watching tv. From gaming I got a sense of 'being someone' of the thrill of coming out on top in the competitive aspect Counter Strike has. Now that I quit I feel like a nobody. Not important, not recognized, lonely. I guess I have always felt this way but with Counter Strike I was just distracting myself temporarily to get away from that feeling and experience a sense of recognition that performing good ingame gives you. With now time in the evening to explore my creativity and do self inquiry more commited, I should be feeling on top of everything since my self actualization is going into the right direction, but I don't. I'm very critical with myself so when I don't feel like I did something perfect I feel a lot of dissapointment. This perfectionistic view is something that I'm working on myself and with my psychologist aswell. I'm probably just in the middle of a storm right now, so I feel quite blinded to all the beautiful stuff that is right here in front of me. But I have the feeling that when I get through this, I will be able to experience life in a totaly different way.

In theory I know this. But when I’m in the midst of a struggle or depression there is always this need to immediately solve this ‘problem’ because my mind tells me I cannot be happy with this going on. But I guess after a while this will pass too

@Pebble These problems are really just symptoms of a much bigger thing going on. Do you meditate? Do you do shadow work?

Find out why you cheat. Why do you do this even when things are going perfect? Is it the wrong doing that feels good? Is your self respect low and you sabotage your relationships because you feel like you don’t deserve them? Look into this. Go to a therapist if you have to. It helps a lot with uncovering the root problem, and working on that thing effectively

What helped me was printing out a calender and crossing out the days. Also affirming every morning why you are not masturbating and your motivation for it works really good.

@Leo Gura That made me laugh so hard

The first week you feel a big impact, after that it takes a year or so to really notice a change. The difference in effects you get from 1 year and 10 years is unimaginable. You just have to keep at it. It will be the best habit you ever implemented in your life.

@AlwaysBeNice Word has it that when you have ‘ Sp.r. ‘ in your last name enlightenment is 10 times easier to obtain David Spero Rupert Spira A coincidence? I think not

@Leo Gura That reminds me of a Rupert Spira analogy haha

You’re right. I want to look attractive because I feel quite insecure and not acceptive of how I look. I want someone to have an emotional connection with. Might not be very masculine but that’s how I feel.

@Leo Gura Yes I guess it’s because I got picked on when I was young because I’m quite skinny. There is just a desire to look ‘good’. I know this desire is egoic but it’s still there

@Leo Gura I want to gain muscle. The only way of eating I’ve ever really used is 2 sandwiches in the morning, 6 in the afternoon and 2 sandwiches + fruit later in the afternoon. What could I replace bread with? It’s something so ingrained in my culture to eat sandwiches throughout the day. Gain muscle but at the same time eat clean so that I can have a clear mind for consciouness work. Is this possible?

@Truth Seekah Ohhhh yess dude I love me some Em. Do you have some recommendations of other amazing rappers with preferably deep lyrics?

@Leo Gura windows 10 looks sexy though

I’ve been getting quite into Peter Ralston’s teachings lately and I found out that his workshops from Chenghsin are also in the Netherlands. Since I don’t have much money to spend as a student I was wondering if there are any people here who have good experiences with his workshops. I already go to Rupert Spira’s retreats twice a year so I have to spend and save my money in a thoughtful way

@Leo Gura Yes he was the first to win westener to win a full contact championship right? The guy is amazing. I am considering to take lessons on his way of boxing. The art of effortless power

@Space No problem. It's in Nijmegen though so you'd have to travel a little more by train. I would really love to meet Peter Ralston myself aswell. Hopefully he is able to be there. If not, I'm sure he has people there who have insight and can help you grasp the things you are not conscious of yet.

@egoless Yes but I am not sure if he will come all the way to the Netherlands. He is getting older after all.

@Torkys Yes it’s quite usual in 1 hour + sittings

@Shiva Oh never heard of that. Sounds interesting, thanks for the help

@Shiva You mean like workshops of spiritual teachers for example? Lectures and such?