legendary

@winterknight I would love to know what your opinion about Tom Campbell's proposition is: Feel free to post anywhere you like. Thanks!

@Salvijus the point Tom Campbell is trying to make is that the idea of liberation from suffering is born from the same self-identifying mechanism that creates suffering. I have not experienced past lives or anything of that sort, so any talk about karma is nothing more than runination from me. Why would you want to Mukti so bad? Because current state of ego-identification and self-deception create a lot of misery. If one were swallowed by love and devotion for the Absolute, as some highly Self-realised beings are, perhaps they don't care about liberation anymore.

An extremely 'Yellow' answer from Jordan Peterson. Very pertinent, because it shows the nuance of stage Yellow, but it is evident that Leo's answer to the same question would've been more Turquoise.

Trump: Channelling the deceitfulness and insincerity of Stage Red/Orange Sanders: Epitomising Stage Green It's clear who is closer to the Truth!

Even back when I knew nothing about Non-duality, there was clearly something intuitively True about Spacey's experience of death in American Beauty. Thanks for sharing:)

The following is an excerpt from Jan Esmann's book- Lovebliss. The interviewer asks Jan some questions that someone new on this path is likely to have. Hope this helps:) Q: Does the small self wander from life to life? I mean, we reincarnate, don’t we? J: The tendencies of the small self perpetuate themselves from life to life, and they generate a new small self from life to life. The energy in the small self keeps on going, but the specific ego is generated in each life around a basic core that reincarnates. This means that the less you identify with the small self, the more you will have continuity between lives, and eventually you will be able to remember past lives. The more you are identified with the small self, the more you will actually lose. I told you, the small self is a fiction. Believing it to be you is a trap. Q: Does the Self not reincarnate? J: The Self cannot be said to be incarnated or non-incarnated. Remember, it simply IS and does not depend on anything, nor is it qualified by anything. It is the Pure Being that permeates all your lives, and it is your presence here and now. It has no history, since it does not grow or age, so therefore it cannot be said to reincarnate. But do remember, it is YOU. The Self is the detached witness of all your lives, and it is the deepest continuity throughout the changing existences. Q: So what actually reincarnates if not the Self? J: First and foremost, the identity structure built up around the identification mechanism. In other words, everything you believe you are will wander from life to life. The dynamics of the identification mechanism is anything that is self-referential and which generates identity structures in the psyche. These dynamics are any psychological workings that can be put in the formula “I … this/that/him”. For example, “I hate this”, “I desire that”, “I played with him”, etc. So all of the basic psycho-dynamics and emotions are the culprits. They include hate, desire, greed, lust; but also self-referential activities like cheating, hurting, deceiving, etc. that define you through a negative space. The negative space is either within you, as in “I need this”, or projected onto another, as in “she is wrong”, etc. Banal love is also a culprit since it is defined by a lack and a want which is self-referential. True love, however, is not self-referential and based on lack, but is based on abundance and is "other-centered". So is true kindness, true compassion and true devotion, and so forth. Today most acts of kindness, compassion and devotion are self-referential and spring from more or less unconscious calculations such as, “If I am kind to him, he will help me”. Such hypocrisy greatly enhances the identity structure. Q: What happens to all this after Self-realization? J: Its days are numbered. After Self-realization all this may still have energy in it, and will continue on for a while. If it has enough energy after death, it will generate another incarnation. Once you get Self-realized you will feel it falling away at an incredible rate. So your sādhana after Self-realization becomes twofold. First and foremost is to merge into Lovebliss. Secondly, be aware of the energy contained within the identity structures that are still hanging around whenever they become active. And when they become active, you simply observe them from the Self, with Lovebliss, and they will crush. Some energies have to manifest and so be it. You simply observe that also, and remember that it is only karma unfolding. Q: Is all this, which you call unfolding energies, the same as karma? J: Yes, it is the same. Remember that with Self-realization you step out of these energies, and this is the same as saying that you step out of karma. In the Bhagavad-Gītā it is called: “stepping out of the gunas”, and it is the same thing. Self-realization is freedom, it is liberation.

I had an interesting lucid dream experience a few nights ago. I was extremely tired that night, so I fell asleep pretty quickly and went into a dream state. I found myself lying down on the grass, in the same place where I smoked the toad medicine (Bufo Alvarius) a few months ago in Barcelona. I wasn't surrounded by any person in this dream, but my wishes were being taken care of. One of the things the shaman (Octavio Rettig) did during the actual retreat was blowing Rapé through the person's nose. In the dream, I became aware of the possibility to get this, so I said (well, just set the intention) let's get Rapé. And the next instant, it was done! The pipe was brought near my nostrils, the chemical was blown and I felt the harsh taste in my nose and throat. I could not believe how real that experience felt. Then I wondered if I could take it a step further and try the toad medicine; and boom! Done! Suddenly the dream reality began to vanish and everything got dissolved in bright light. I was pretty scared and excited at the same time. I felt as if a giant hand lifted me up from the ground and push me towards the light. The dream stopped being a dream! I started begging for the experience to stop. It stopped after a while and I woke up. Even in my dreams the ego doesn't fail to put up a fight! I wonder if taking the toad medicine in the dream convinced my brain to endogenously produce a tiny amount. -Cheers!

I grew up in a Vegetarian family and never ate meat until the age of 18, when I went off to college. After that, I had an on and off relationship with meat. But it never became my staple. I experimented with Veganism after I graduated, but never got the hang of it. I felt weaker and even fell sick at the end of my two months of Veganism, at least partially because I didn't take adequate care of my micronutrient needs. After that: 6-8 months of constant meat eating, where I also experimented with the Paleo diet. A few months ago, I smoked toad medicine (Bufo Alvarius) at a retreat in Barcelona with Octavio Rettig. While there were many insights I gained from the experience, towards the end of my trip, I became acutely aware of how my decisions have been creating suffering and pain for others, which was antithetical to this self-actualization journey. I felt sad for the death of all those animals (I briefly stayed in India during my Paleo phase, where the butcher kills the chicken/goat right in front of you before chopping it to pieces and selling you the meat); it was quite emotional for me. Since then, I generally avoid eating meat . I eat organic eggs from cage free hens; and only eat meat when I'm travelling abroad and cannot find nutrient dense vegan food. I agree with the ethical arguments against eating meat, but I believe every person must make this choice by their own volition. Cheers!

@winterknight Are you fully enlightened/liberated? I believe self-inquiry can lead to genuine insights into the true nature of reality, however, that may not be permanent + it may not be complete. In Buddhist/Hindu jargon, what I'm asking is whether you have escaped from the cycle of death & rebirth. Also, do you dream at night? Do you still have a shadow-self? Thanks! Apologies if this has already been answered.

@archi are you sure about this? I read a bit about Kambo online, but I could not find any mention of this

Leo didn't start to "believe" in this now. He has mentioned this in his 'paranormal phenomena' episode; and basically, his point is that there is overwhelming anecdotal evidence supporting this. Of course, from the perspective of God there is no such thing as a past life, but from the perspective of an individuated consciousness, there may be.

@Leo Gura what's the difference between extremely nondual trips (as you say) and a whiteout? It seems that they both have the same repercussions.

@Serotoninluv wow! Just out of curiosity, how much time do you allot for integration between trips? I remember you had another breakthrough trip just last month?

Great trip report. Thanks for sharing!

@Timotheus Thanks!

@The Blind Sage Of course you can! LSD is the most potent psychedelic that there is. I have had some paradigm shattering trips with LSD. My body's tolerance is high with all drugs in general, so I didn't notice anything significant below 150ug. Everyone is different so, be careful as you increase your dosage. Also, meditate and set intention for what it is you want out of the trip. One cannot just take the drug and wait for it to give you the insight.

@SgtPepper I don't reckon you'll be able to do it in the US, since 5-MeO is a Schedule 1 drug. You can always go down to Mexico, though.

Context: I am 10 days away from a planned Bufo Alvarius session with Octavio Rettig in Spain. Since the retreat organisers strictly state: "no drugs a week before", I thought now might be a good time to trip existentially once so that I breakthrough successfully later Dosage: 400ug LSD Insights: I became aware of the Fact, that Being is Infinite, in all dimensions, everywhere It became glaringly obvious to me how consciousness is a 'shapeshifter' as Leo put it. It has no attributes whatsoever, so it can be everything The residue of my materialist, rationalist paradigm was completely shattered. I encountered this with my 24ug 5-MeO trip before, but there it was more of a shock and I didn't have time to grasp the repercussions of the insight. But now, on LSD, this insight was concretized gradually, such that I cannot deny it anymore. Consciousness is fundamental to reality and existence, not atoms and molecules. Holy fucking shit! Are you kidding me?! I'm an engineer, man! I became aware of the ego, and it is just so much bullshit! Infinite degree of self-deception. I feel that I cannot take anything literally anymore, because the Devil will misconstrue it, even if it is a teaching about enlightenment. Pure irreducible being is all that can be trusted. I feel that there is nowhere to hide anymore. And nowhere to go. What's even the point of lying and bullshitting?! (Of course, I will come up with reasons later) I became conscious of what Nonduality really means. Holy fucking shit! I cannot be jealous of, criticise or judge anything ever again (of course I will find a way) My entire life and being has been completely recontextualized. I understand why they call it 'emptiness' and why people say stuff like 'God is!, saying anything more is already misleading'. My fears: I had originally thought that I would try doing self-inquiry in the dark and face my fears, but the things mentioned above just blew all my plans away But after having all these insights, it became clear to me that what I feared truly wasn't some scary phenomenon or a crazy mindfuck, but the lack of a first person perspective! So I returned to the same position where I was at the end of my 5-MeO trip, knowing that I need to surrender this sense of self, getting close, but failing to do so. Again, so much bullshit here, I became aware of how I'm escaping doing the really important work and instead thinking if I can come up with more insights or something. It really felt like I'm fighting an invisible dragon, as Leo described, but it is just..tough What's next: The Bufo Alvarius ceremony, of course! I hope the drug is powerful, because this ego structure I have is a fucking beast. It will not die! Just wanted to share this. If there is anything I'm misconstruing or doing incorrectly, then please let me know. One obvious mistake I made was to trip on a Sunday evening. This gives me no time to sit and reflect upon my insights, but I had to study for an important test before (of course, it is not important at all, in a way)

@SoonHei Yes, very subtle indeed. almost all thinking can be boiled down to self-deception

@PsiloPutty Thanks! This trip was much needed. So much bullshitery going on!

@Recursoinominado they happen in Europe (Spain and Netherlands) and the Americas (Mexico) as far as I know. Google it and follow-up on the leads

This is a really good debate on the Nature of Reality between Alan Wallace (Buddhist Scholar/Teacher) and Sean Carroll (from the Quantum Mechanics episode). There are so many debates on YouTube between Atheists and Religious folks (Stage Blue); nothing of value ever comes out of those! This debate also shows why stage Orange is more likely to advance to Yellow and Turquoise compared to stage Blue.

@kieranperez thanks!