Avi

@Dhana Choko I'm just thinking out loud right now but is it possible that when we say things like "I want to have more sexual experiences" that we are really hiding behind something that is much deeper? For example, a person would want more sexual experiences and they absolutely think that this is what they want, but deep down in their sub consciousness they are really needy, or insecure, or lonely, or all the above?

@Fer Lazo dang, I wish i could go. Im from la but helping my sister out that night. Maybe we can attend another event together sometime soon?

Wanted to share my realization and insight this morning that I had while meditating. I am not my brain and I am not my mind. The thoughts that come to me are from past inputs and "experiences". My mind is just running on auto pilot waiting for more sensory input so it can have more thoughts. I am not doing this, someone else is. I knew this but I never realized it. When I was done meditating I went "Ohhhhhhh I see it now". Then I the question that popped into my mind was is my awareness on auto pilot too? What do you all think?

@Ayla It totally does, I will try this tomorrow!

@Ayla I need to contemplate on that.

@Ayla Thank you for your guidance

Do improv comedy for the rest of my life and preform in front of others.

@Emerald Wilkins Completely agree with you

@jonny This is awesome that you are aware of your situation. It's a great first step

23

@Emily I'm on that book right now !!! I have to constantly reread sections and go back and be like "what is he saying?" haha

@vizual You bring up an interesting point that I've never thought of before. You don't need discipline if you love what you're doing. You just do and not think about it.

@Pierre Agreed.

@Simon Zackrisson I wouldn't disregard this nor would I judge what I say so quickly. The mind tends to resist what it doesn't know as "normal" and we have a hard time letting go of this "normalcy". Although the examples I gave are highly exaggerated I would still think or rather, don't think about the Truth within them.

I would like to add that being honest and open like this take a lot of practice and people will think you are super weird. It also takes a lot of courage. But the rewards you reap from this DWARF all the awkward moments and people thinking you are super weird.

THIS POST IS HIGHLY GRAPHIC AND USES SEXUAL REFERENCES TO GET THE POINT ACROSS. I would like to try and use contemplation and self-inquiry to see why a person would want to hook up on the first date/give head/jerk off etc... For example (and this can work for a either guy/girl/trans etc... but I will be mainly using guy/girl because it's just easier formatting wise): Example 1 Guy and Girl are done with the date. They are both in the car together. Guy: I had so much fun tonight! Thanks for letting me take you out on a date. Girl: Of course, thank you for taking me. I had a great time at dinner. Guy: You are totally welcome. Girl: You know... I think you are totally cute and fun. I would love to give you a blowjob in my apartment if you are up for it? No pun intended of course. Pause. Guy: You know I love getting head and I think you are really cute as well. May I ask you, besides me being cute and all, why you want to give me head? Girl: I'm looking to have more sexual experiences and I'm not really looking for anything serious at the moment. I just want to have fun and be more open with my sexuality. Guy: You know, I just got out of a serious relationship and I'm actually on the same page as you! I too am looking to have more sexual experiences and have fun. Girl: Great, well come on over and we can talk more and have some fun. End. Example 2 Guy and Girl are done with the date. They are both in the car together. Guy: I had so much fun tonight! Thanks for letting me take you out on a date. Girl: Of course, thank you for taking me. I had a great time at dinner. Guy: You are totally welcome. Girl: You know... I think you are totally cute and fun. I would love to give you a blowjob in my apartment if you are up for it? No pun intended of course. Pause. Guy: You know I love getting head and I think you are really cute as well. May I ask you, besides me being cute and all, why you want to give me head? Girl: Well to be completely open and honest, I've been extremely depressed the past few months and I've been having a lot of family trouble, my sister just committed suicide and my dad past away last year and it's just been to much. I want to use your cock to get over it. Guy: I am so sorry to hear that all of that has happened to you and I can relate as my brother also committed suicide and my dad also past away last year. I'm actually trying to improve myself but I don't want to use sex or sexual activities to cover up my pain. I'm sorry but I don't want for you to give me a blowjob because you are trying to get over your personal problems. It just doesn't feel right to me. Girl: I understand and thank you for your honesty. Would you like to meet again for drink or dinner so we can get to know each other better? Guy: Of course! End. So please notice that the roles can be reversed with the guy having the issues and the girl saying no. In Example 1 there was honest and clear communication between both parties of what they wanted to do. The terms were talked about and action was implemented. In Example 2 I switched both people's lives by introducing some sort of great external pain that each person was having. This in turn, proposed sexual activity not because the girl wanted to explore and have fun but to cover up the pain and harm of this "external conflict". If you've done a lot of personal development work you will know that approaching sex or sexual activities from this perspective is damaging and often leaves both parties confused, misunderstood, and hurt. Further more, I wish individuals talked like this more often with each other as it lays out goals, wants, needs, and problems. The parties involved can't help but come up with a solution. I try and practice this every chance I get as it makes me more open and aware of my motivations, my purpose, and my wants and needs and it also lets the other person know what I want and where I stand. This is why contemplation and self inquiry is so powerful when you do this with yourself and others. Your beliefs, assumptions, and conclusions about you and the world fall away and it becomes about you (in a non-ego way) and your experiences leaving every possibility open, including being honest about what you want and how you want it. -------------------------------- Shaved and Grooming Examples: Example 1 Guy and Girl are done with the date. They are both in the car together. Guy: I had so much fun tonight! Thanks for letting me take you out on a date. Girl: Of course, thank you for taking me. I had a great time at dinner. Guy: You are totally welcome. Girl: You know... I think you are totally cute and fun. I'm just looking to have fun, nothing serious. I would love to give you a blowjob in my apartment if you are up for it? No pun intended of course. But I only like fully shaved cock's. I don't like hairy cock's. Guy: You know I feel the same way! Not about the cock's of course, about you! You are so cute and fun and I would love for you to give me a blowjob. Girl: Great! Well come on up! Guy: I would love to but I don't like shaving down there. I like my hair down there and I don't want to change for anyone. Girl: I see. Well since we are both on the same page about us just having fun and not anything serious then we can end it here. Guy: I agree. I just think we are on different paths in life and I can't seem to comprise with you. It was amazing meeting you though. I had such a great time. Girl: Me too! Wish you all the best. End. Example 2 Guy and Girl are done with the date. They are both in the car together. Guy: I had so much fun tonight! Thanks for letting me take you out on a date. Girl: Of course, thank you for taking me. I had a great time at dinner. Guy: You are totally welcome. Girl: You know... I think you are totally cute and fun. I'm just looking to have fun, nothing serious. I would love to give you a blowjob in my apartment if you are up for it? No pun intended of course. But I only like fully shaved cock's. I don't like hairy cock's. Guy: I feel the exact same way! I too am just looking to have fun. And I have a fully shaved cock! What perfect timing! Girl: Come on up! End. In Example 1 we showed that people have different preferences when it comes to what they like. If you don't like something, even if it's grooming habits you have a right to say "sorry! this isn't going to work out because of "x". And take note, the guy and girl are on different paths because of one's liking for a hairy penis vs. not a hairy penis. In Example 2 we showed that these individuals are in fact on the same page with each other. Even if the guys cock is hairy he would still shave it because he likes doing it and he has found someone that like that grooming habit of his. We so often try to change other people or try and "fix" them but know that this is just a reflection of your own insecurities and problems that you have and are projecting on other people. Further more, I believe the term "slut" is just a term we made up because we are afraid of open and honest communication with each other. It's just a belief though so don't take it to seriously. All these examples are way to show how enlightenment and the practice of mediation can be used to be open and honest with what we want and our needs for ourselves. Thanks for reading if you got this far.

Mine are: Is this happening right now or am I just perceiving that this is happening? Who is aware of my awareness? Am I asleep? What/Who am I without this thought? Just a few though I find the more that meditate and contemplate the more angles I find of questions.

@Wini Just NoFap. Sex is actually encouraged during the NoFap phase. Real sex helps the brain change back to it's "pre-porn" phase. I don't know about the drop in testosterone, that might be something else. I do know from personal experience that my energy level has been insane these past couple of days. www.yourbrainonporn.com this is a great resource for learning about NoFap. Also www.reddit.com/nofap is really great to see other people in their experiences with NoFap.

@Emilio Once you experience that you are not your thoughts and you can watch them just pass you by, it is so powerful.

No news and it feels great!

Froyo or ice cream is the best first date. Not because I'm on a date with a girl I'm interested in but because I love froyo and ice cream. Do what you want to do, she will follow if she agrees to the date.

I felt a lot more calm and love for myself after the first couple of days. Now I don't want to miss my morning meditation routine!

@Pablo Neirotti It's awesome that you are aware of what's pissing you off! That's a great first step. @Rito has given some great advice. I would also suggest looking into your daily life to see if something else is triggering you.

@SenshiAna Couldn't agree more with just being.

From my personal experience hiking has been the best. Every time I get the urge I jump in my car and climb a mountain. I leave near a lot of hikes so it's easy for me hahah