ValiantSalvatore

@Thought Art That song reminds me of good rock music lol, I love Korn. This is the most conscious rant I have seen so far.

If humans would outsource themselves, the would be the highest peak of self-hatred in a sense, I don't think that is what A.I is designed to do, it's more about creation and optimization for the sake of human related issues, that humans alone can't solve. Like building a skyscraper alone is close to impossible, yet with a crane and thousands of humans, and/or other tools it's possible. I dunno I believe in Yoda, maybe I am delusional. Humans will find a way to outsmart anything I feel. I pretty sure A.I can help with art, as a brush does it for a painter, it mostly depends what tools someone likes, and which tools. I mean the A.I always has to be feed with a certain amount of data ... if it's not feed any data and can't generate it on it's own, there is nothing new happening it will only work within it's constraints. It certains helps to generate ideas, I think it should be compatible, although I might be wrong. They even show the data feed for the A.I https://openai.com/blog/jukebox/ A great musican can turn anything into art, I'd say this is pretty cool inspiration I love musican and I am an A.I fan.. so I am biased, yet I would never listen to music generated by this A.I. I heared to an artist just rant about it, and I think it's heavily biased, and judgemental against the A.I, yet I figure this is just what it is currently... I also don't like some topics, yet I think it can be used as an inspiration, and I would support humans first and A.I second. If there needs to be the choice.

Repression of sexuality, after my dating adventure I looked a bit into sexology and it was used for example by churches and kings for birth control, so the rich stay rich and the poor poor, in stage blue ethnocentric driven cultures in europe etc. Many never developed quality and go for the path of least resistance, the highest quality relationships are of people who are mostly attuned to nature and ethics in a way, and have a loving relationship instead of materalism with TV and are working pretty hard and have a connection to spirituality and great friendships. Which is super rare. Don't see relationships as mastery process Abundance of porn and sexual material creates false expectations Excess individuality of stage orange, (middle class invented sexual fetishes etc.) I think smth. akin to this as it was allowed, historically.... see nowadays the good middle class will most likely be in favour of this kind of liberty without taking spirituality into account. I think porn is fine, for example just apparently is not the greatest for some couples. All religions teach this, and it's a surivial mechanism to maximize pleasure and reduce suffering, and many do whatever they want recklessly as long as this is present Apparently there is happiness beyond conditions, this is what I wanted to work upon with Shinzen... Because you have a body I'd say without a physical system that does not elicit pain, there would not be the believe, unfortunate cirumstance of karma... in that way, cause and effect. Manipulation, gasligting, power dynamics, being made fun of, anxiety, fear trauma. Ego and power, as well as a lack of integrity. Not a single leader as smart and competent disambiguating power in power to stay in power and don't act from power. At least this is my pov..., yet he/she still has to hold power otherwise this does not work. See Ken Wilber as leader of integral I never get the sense that he is in power, yet he has power and is in power in a sense of the community there, and also has been. I might have seen one holistic leader who is capeable, of it as LC's support it...' Translogical power would be the key term, I've learned. Also lack of healing and compassion. Here goes me...

@uriel Other question what are you doing in tech regarding A.I? Are you into machine learning or deep learning? What are your responsibilities? My life purpose is to head into A.I, some of this stuff is so heavily mathematically favoured, that someone said you might as well could do a Ph.D to be one of the best so to speak, I also read that this is sort of a toxic academia mindset, to be the best. I am doing a masters in applied cs. I dunno I feel similar to music, yet I was never supported in the endeavour, when I went to music school as a kid, as my parents just fundamentally left me alone. I can't play a single instrument anymore. It was also only a 4 year+ programm. What do you feel can you create space to make a living out of music and still call it a passion?

@Bando I dunno ultimately, and I don't care all to much.

The point is spiral dynamics is about values, and not about development itself the cook-greuter model is about ego-development. Wilber is not on the highest level of development he is centered at approximately causal witness state as a permanent structure-state (in one taste he reports this) - he could have gone beyond and could be centered at non-dual There is a distinction between structure-states and state-stages State-stages are sufficient, but not neccessary for growth in structure-states Structure states is the permanent realization of the next higher state-stage You can be at stage green structurally (cognitively and value based) and have spiritual non-dual state-stage realization. Spirituality is the highest line of "intelligence" so to say. State-stages can be reached by "peak experiences" meditation, "psychdelics" (I bet no research), yoga, some spiritual practice, eventually even exercise and fluke luck. As far as I know these values can first develop when the cogntive development (neccessary ego-development) has taken place Spiral dynamics can only play itself out when the neccessary cognitive development is there Some philosophers were outliers who surpassed this, Leo mentioned some of them in his blog and the intro about philosophy video Growth occures to current "scientific" understandings with 30 minutes of meditation alone and beign aware of integral theory and spiral dynamics. (Idealistic information I am sharing here) Growth occures approx. every 2 years and after ages 20-29 every 5 years one new stage is reached with consistent practice Stage turqouise is still within the ego.... it's not beyond the ego, yet it's the first that actively seeks to be more transpersonal, instead of green fadish spirituality, there is a deeper consistency with practices and going beyond the ego becomes a desire (see Maslow transpersonal stages), peak experiences etc. become more of the norm Depending on life circumstances, you can drop in SD development, yet hitting one stage makes it permanent even when you spiral down, if LC's (life conditions) are meet you are there again. Ex: Many who hit green in academia then go back into the real world who are disappointed with post-modern lifestyles re-engage in materalistic excess of orange, even when they still have the capacity to go back to Green any time. As far as I know Spinoza is mentioned a couple of times with Hegel in Wilbers books, I don't study this academically, my raw intuition would have put him and Hegel at around Yellow with their idealism and it seems very system-thinking like. I think Leo also mentions that we could educate ourselves about them if you are more serious about philosophy in his intro to philosophy video, mostly using Wikipedia. I don't like Nietzschians, they seem very stage red to me with some green, yet mostly toxic. I like Hegel, although I don't like studying western philosophy that deeply, it takes a lot of time. If you want to grow you could directly go to the source at integrallife and study the courses there I did integral mindfulness to get a taste of all stages within spiral dynamics as a structure-stage and it's corresponding values - expression of stage when realized. I don't think it's neccessary, I would just look at the video from Leo about philosohpy and read up on Wikipedia takes notes and ideally do psychedelics and read Wilber, as well as watch videos for growth. Or dive right into the research the paper from O'Fallon seems to be the latest addition to the ego-development model (abillity to take perspective...). Sri Aurobindo was the one who inspired Wilber, who came up with the stages stuff, I believe... before Graves and Beck for Spiral Dynamics. In an older audiobook it's mentioned traveling and journaling can nudge you up 0.5 stages, especially if you are young 20-29 max, as far as I know. Wilber also mentions that weightlifting helped him to grow and he regrets not having it done early to facillitate growth in consciouness better phrased ego-development. Fundamentally, you need to have a spiritual practice as a baseline to grow. This is all the info I have to this topic I hope it clarifies stuff. Also, this certainly does not fixing dating actually makes it harder. I wrote all of this rather naively and idealistically, this certainly does not apply to everyone.

There is no way, as a German I frankly found him the only likeable philosopher of the rationals, tbh. I presonally find them all laughable. That is legit funny. I like Greeks more, I bet even Euclid was a better philosopher than Kant. Heraclitus is mah man. Sorry, I love to hate on Germans at times.

Thanks for saying that , truth hurts one thing I noticed when I went very deep. It was very eye-opening though got a taste of what consciouness really is about. Now I get more minor entries to this, I still get very emotional when I enter near that area. I never had an ego-death experience. It was more a form of union with consciouness and nature, as a state experience.

I did truffles also with cannabis, they were so weak for me I barely noticed anything and it reminded me more of MDMA, that was the first time I ever did shrooms and I took a medium dose, I think with a friend. The trip was almost to chill, just good vibes and some love. Might aid in the perspective as info. It was Atlantis truffles. We drank them infused with lemon ginger tea. I would not measure experience by amount, yet by quality and quantity of trips, as well as ability to explain and make sense of the experiences spiritually. I pretty much always meditate with intentions before, that aids for some groundding.

I dunno, I've never done DMT I only done it once and it was to intense for me. I am extremely visual internally, although the last trips I did last year have been not as deep visually as the first 10 I get internal geometry type stuff. So in terms of a psychonaut I am still pretty newbie. You can certainly nudge with smaller doses, never do what you can't handle. This is my reference experience, hope it has value to you!

Ranges were from 200-600mcg mostly, I smoked at least 0.5-1.5g max of weed/cannabis most likely on the duration of the trip. At one point it did not help anymore and it was also to much at times. I smoked also pure. First time I did it was approx 400 on 1P-LSD with approx the same amount of cannabis as you . This was 6 years ago. Was my first and only baby-horror trip, although in retrospect I learned a lot about my shadow self, as I did shadow work during that time (3-2-1 process which is a mild cogntive based strategy...) and the setting was with a person I did not like. Depending on length of the exercise, it can be done also a bit deeper. I tripped approx.... 22 times after the first trip without cannabis, eventually also with some cannabis I can't recall every trip. I am approx 30+- 5 into tripping with LSD, so still relatively newbie and intermediate. It was interesting to explore, can vouch definitely with nudging and experience, I am unsure I never went for a breakthrough dose. In case if that could be a question, for deepning and prolonging I can vouch at one point it becomes the norm sorta. (Now 3-4 months without any tripping). Integration went farily smooth, yet my spiritual work was off during this time, and my deepest trip was meditating for 8h on LSD, with some cannabis eventually could have been. Definitely smoked afterwards at a retreat which was also interesting to see, how that connects.

Cannabis and LSD mixed fairly well for me, I am not an in-depth expert, yet psychdelic strains such as silver-haze and super-silver-haze worked for me, and prolonged the trip and deepend the trip. I did this for approx 8-12x or, so I am unsure it was pretty deepening for me everytime. Also lacing cannabis with hash, was pretty good. Can vouch, I would recommend vaping/vaporizing, if possible because of health, I did not do that during that time. Super silver haze was pretty insane and enjoyable, although fear hold me back to go deeper. I also used hash, like honey hash and indica based hash. I could not take to much of that, Terrence McKenna recommends it post DMT trips to calm down. IIRC. I don't have the link to this, info it was in some video of him.

I did a quick Google search only, yes apparently there is something like this, also the insurance can pay some of it if you have a more severe health issues. I did not dive into the technicalities. The test you send me would suffice for now, as it's a lot of effort thank you again!

Thanks I'll keep it in mind. Just saw it costs 24€ per heavy metal, by going to a doctor lol that is expensive.

@Jannes Where did you make the test? I'd be curious also here from Germany too!

Sorry, I did not read this. Basically you can sweep through the body and for example start with the feet, and move towards the skull. Slowly with awareness and concentration going through the body and notice, where guilt is held as an emotion. Then do that again from top skull to bottom feet and look just how your body feels. Go through shoulders, legs,hands, extremities ears, let eye lids relax. You can set the intention to explore guilt and journal afterwards, e.g 20 min body-scan and 10 min journal afterwards to describe what you felt. With mindfulness skills, you can with practice dive heads deep into it and penetrate without a strict body-scan technique. Similar to UnbornTao's answer with direct inquiry. Just without inquiry and just pure penetration. I did it more in a momentary awareness style, so I did not focus. I am using a khanika samadhi style of meditation. As that fits my personality the most.

@Emerald I think she is banned, it's a second account of pretty india, before saying more lol. I am unsure though, yet hi also as fellow INFJ.

@Ulax https://integrallife.com/integral-mindfulness-and-the-evolution-of-shame/ Is the link of the video of the session with corey from integral life, I was a member I'd wanted to do his book shadow light for a shadow process, as I did some IFS during a Shinzen retreat (I full-throttled the audiobook), you could check it out it might aid you. I am unsure how good it is, I did sections from online-courses from integral with him involved and it was a lot about sexuality and love, he has over 10k hours in couples therapy etc. and councled with presidents according to him. I'd definitely check him out. What I find funny about him, he likes psychology so much he himself still get psychotherapy it's sorta amazing lol. https://www.amazon.com/stores/Keith-Witt/author/B00J9VQYVU?ref=ap_rdr&store_ref=ap_rdr&isDramIntegrated=true&shoppingPortalEnabled=true It's unfortunately behind a pay-wall, yet you might find something of value

From experience I can only say from doing stuff on my own, probing with question on what is behind the guilt. I went pretty existential on a trip with meditation for this, where I was feeling ashamed to be human and steadily move to pride as an emotion, you could ask. Why do I feel guilty? What can I change to stop feeling guilty internally? Is it based on a belief system? What am I believing? In which situations does guilt manifest? Am I supressing guilt? Why am I supressing emotions? What am I afraid of? Does fear cause guilt? Probing with meditation (body scan technique etc, then write down what was evoked penetrating guilt so to say) Gult&Shame is a social modulator (i have this info from dr.keith witt from integral), it's a good mechanism to have if you consider survival, it helps to adhere to norms and not kill us (own interpretation as well as info from Witt). Exploring guilt is for me already the correct question, and part of the work, I also feel a lot of guilt more "esoteric" ressources helped me to deal with it just knowing I am apparently more prone to it, it's sort of like a feedback mechanism to me to see socities standards and question them, as well as personal beliefs and trapped emotions etc. Obviously, also to not go crazy and be a functional human to others. This is how I explored it through manual journaling mostly in early phases of development. I find it's connected to vulnerabillity and ego, I've certainly become more authentic and can come forth from a more innocent place. How to stop worrying and start living was a great book that helped me to overcome similar emotions and issue that might befall you, I could re-read it some principles are very good in there, like living in day-tight-compartments etc. Hope this is interesting and of value to you!

I dunno I liked the David DeAngelo online-course as it seems to me very blue-yellow pilled, I looked at the current dating scene and most of it that is somewhat clear I'd frame as orange pill, as it's very optimization based, and is not truely holistic, also women are included sometimes cherrypicked. This is nout about politics though, more about having clean sources and even without PUA knowledge guys, can be pretty toxic and virtue as well as vanity are two different things imo. I noticed how this goes a little out of hand, where a chinese guy I just got to know said "white girls are racist no?", I know my humour is hellacious at times. Still the orange pill would benefit him a lot, so to speak with more developed humans the issue would not exist. Also I find the orange pill partially exhausting, as it's about a numbers game, while this is true. Finding strategies and inner game that works. I don't think many do this to integrate this in a vision of themselves that is not "hyper-masculine", I'd still like to see vulnerabillity game from a jacked guy. To see the difference. I think toxic masculinity has been on the rise since Covid-19? Even in South-Korea in their political landscape etc. was shaped by this. The unfortunate spiral truth is it's a numbers game and it takes skill & competence to get good with women. When you listen to Andrew Tate for dating advice, I personally feel you have to be partially delusional, at the sametime men relate to it because it validates some masculine worldview, that I personally think is stupid. I would prefer someone like Arnold Schwarzenegger to be seen as a masculine man, instead of Andrew Tate. Yet from going out I know a lot of guys like it because it's funny and toxic, and then act with well where is your non-judgement now? I just can't watch it I am to influenceable, the dating advice I got is pretty good, it takes just a lot of practice and most of the priority to build a nuclear family as it's their desire to do so. Beign a low value guy (no prolific future) and also seeing how a lot of "assholes" get the girl. I've read some stuff, where they explain it's mostly about assertivness and needs, and to not be that guy. Ex: I was out with a friend who is like super nice and loving and well-off possibly millionair (2w3) (I don't usually ask this stuff), beign out with the gucci bag kids so to speak, I see a very attractive girl, guy comes see her as her equity, she had to scream him away with her friends (drunk) they all show him the middle finger as the biggest bouncer packs him at the neck and throws him out, I approached her afterwards as I know I am not like this, and she seemed to calm down, and this must seem to have happend more often (by my observations), my approach was somewhat okay? Yet I am newbie I did not even approach 10 girls I think and I almost got laid and received petting in the club (obviously as I work on myself). Anyway! Afterwards my friend who is super nice and loving (he hates this sh*t) described above, slept with her I had to laugh at how good he is, yet he is basically blessed by enviroment and just looks, (not height) and has very good character also, he just sees a lot more thanks to experience, his best friend is quiet toxic imo, yet he had a pretty rough upbringing and still is like super-nice, just to much zeaolot. When incels are rising, it sort of explains why my mind is corrupted by this stuff without looking at it and the Andrew Tate projections (Strategist perception...) many women who are not very well educated are imo in an blue/orange paradigm with Green values, dictated by culture, and otherwise worse. At least here in Northern Europe. I think women should point out that Andrew Tate is unlikeable and disassociate from him, instead of showing up with him. This is where I see someone like Owen Cook and this whole Orange/green pill type LC's.... is what people want to some level. Obviously, I am inventing some stuff as nobody carries this flag so to speak. The rise of Andrew Tate without looking at any of it made me also more toxic just by beign a man, I don't know why same goes for incels. Andrew Tate for me on some level is sort of an incel. If the guy ever had spiritual sex, I doubt he'd be on that kind of scheming. It's all image and vanity, nothing virtues. The only virtue about is the authentic desire even if it's dark...

So true! Even when it hurts a little reading this.

Scores range from 1 (low) to 5 (high). Your score from primary psychopathy has been calculated as 2.3. Primary psychopathy is the affective aspects of psychopathy; a lack of empathy for other people and tolerance for antisocial orientations. Your score from secondary psychopathy has been calculated as 2.3. Secondary psychopathy is the antisocial aspects of psychopathy; rule breaking and a lack of effort towards socially rewarded behavior. First attempt was 2.0 and 2.8

I scored 7 first and the second attempt 13. I find the second attempt was more true. I was maxed in vanity and authority was very high, I also did this with a legit psychologist all my ranges are normal. I have one SD variance in beign rebellious and one SD variance in blaming others IIRC, also some 1 SD variance in beign avoidant in some sort and anti-social. All within healthy ranges, so these are things to work on. Especially the anti-social thing was good feeback. Don't have the scores did this a while back.

Just going to post what I think after going through what I wanted to go through: Vision oriented and purpose oriented Thinks about values and integrity and works on character qualties empathy,compassion/love,honesty, Is aware of shadow personality Knows what he wants most of the time Goes for what he wants Has drive Stability as well as aspects for a proper prolific future (excuse my english) A certain level of humility (depends on times...) Does not disregard the weak. Does not engage in gossip of the very toxic kind, in terms of gaterhing information I feel it's fine to talk about others sometime Keeps his word, and does his work (I struggle with this personally for various reasons, as I overestimate myself at times) Interested in god/spirituality in a non-dogmatic and non-idealogical way Has projects. Integrates feminine side, and is playful. Rejects toxic feminity!! Has courage to say the truth without going to ham Accept deeper yearnings&darker desires, and chooses to engage and not engage in them. Generally gives direction Can lean into feminine when to much masculine is present Is not overly neutral, yet is neutral when situation asks for it. Is a sexual creature, knows how to please women and enjoys it! Positive ownership in relationships Accepts feedback and does not engage in over-thinking Questions assumptions Let's go of control and controlling others and manipulating Does not act in the expense of others Does not engage in apeish group mockery, out of fear and insecurity Knows how to make fun of himself at times (not to much!!! no clowning) Takes care of physical health Is assertive and direct tells girlfriend 女朋友, boundaries, desires and is interested in holistic communcation and power disambiguation Motivates and supports partner in spiritual pursuit and carrer. Accepts others for who they are and is open-minded. Kicks out toxic loosers in his life who are disinterested in beign in integrity and are just in for the money (tricky, because some like this authentically and need to do the mistake eventually) Is a creator and comepetitor and is not overly competetive, as a certain level of healthy competition with focus on the process, art, beauty and the craft is needed. The best performance comes from god, lol. Is passionate about one and or two things in life (I struggle with this at some level, as I underwent some changes) No smoking cigarettes to be cool Not following toxic media and seeing it as the absolute pinnacle of what masculinity is about. Sees relationships as a mastery process Integrates healthy red (assertivness and going after what you want) with healthy yellow not going for excessive self-interest Upgrades life conditions without excessive self-interest and accepts the ineviabillity of some of it, without demonizing it to much. Non-judgement (I struggle with this to some extend) Aceepts women who have power (It's odd at times, yet I still empower it 99.9% of the times... that is an odd TQ quality... might be purple also) Helps and aids those weaker than himself does not see himself as above as well as beneath others. (tricky as hell -> look into the mirror) Integrates healthy tough love as well as healthy levels of compassion as a feminine approach (tricky as hell) Not lost in schizophrenic delusions (been there, learned some stuff) Accepts the inevitabillity of lonliness at times Non-needy as well as goes after his needs (see Abraham Maslow) healthy friendships, healthy networking (online&offline) etc. Even just brief interactions going out solo and talking to people. Is self-aware Chooses self-aware women/men/trans etc. Does not groom beigns to ones own ideaological agenda. Accepts influence Is aware of projections of others and does not blame others consistently, because of one's own "unfortunate circumstances" Asks for help Goes away from negative news & negative toxic warmongers Accepts most stage of the spiral and is aware of it's pitfalls in Spiral dynamics IMO prefers insight prior to knowledge Does not have predefined categories of women as social roles & stereotypes Engages in positive roles with partner and is aware of them TLDR; Is not a dick and is not a pussy. (I struggle with not beign a dick at times) This is mostly it.

If weed gives you brainfog and causes you to contract, you have pretty intense and hard conditoning, I've tested it when I was young never was the guy who smoked a lot and who chased after weed each day&weekend to skip school, as I was mainly going through life. I practically opened up to a more spiritual reality, yet was forced to re-condition myself socities standards, that was an eye-opener to me, I still did better than most of my non smoking friends in school, and it helped me to realize and see traumatic events and conditioning and to let go of some of it. I had a very deep trip on 1P-LSD and potentiated it with hash a few years back, when I was intersted in psychdelics, as I not interested in my late teen years to do synthetic drugs, and my mother was even fine with me smoking some cannabis, as long as I don't over do it, and I still have the most spiritual connection on cannabis, I never did shatter, and a good bong hit just elevates you to other spaces. I tried splice recently, and saw how stupid it is overload "dopamine receptors" the experience was very uncomfortable and non-spiritual. Also the deepest trips I had on LSD I potentiated with cannabis. When I potentiate the trip with meditation I would most likely refine and refer to different ideas, and use more body based practice and use vapes, as I I am sometimes not so health conscious and smoked joints. For me it's not the best tool, as I conditioned myself to rather lazy activites although I get strong spiritual vibes and insights when I do them, which is mostly video gaming and listening to music contemplating the nature of reality. I loved it that I could potentiate and learn deep lessons, for me it's best used sparsely and I never vaped, as I feel that would make the cravings less and is less ritualistic, as rolling up a joint, there is a stupid pleasure in just having the "skill" to roll-up a joint, and I dunno ironically, most moderate conscious smokers I've meet are very successful in life, so I don't get at times the bad rep about cannabis. It even helped me with the injury I have. I really wanted to test NN-DMT and hash as a come down / potentiator for future trips, yet my body could not handle it I am still injured and I usually exercise a lot and take care of physical health, this also helped immensely to potentiate a trip. There is a huge difference when all the cells in your body are in growth mode, so to speak after doing strenght exercises and taking a break from cannabis for months/years and then doing it. Similar to mediation retreats, strength exercises potentiate the depths, as I can break through the "pains&agitations" of the body. I am not very fluent in doing a lot of DMT, I have an odd brain I notice it's highly visual at times there is no point in describing what I see, so I am a bit vary about NN-DMT, I consistently remember dreams and draw inferences from them, yet seldom people talk about them etc. Others don't seem to have or leverage that kind of spiritual dimension or even ridicule it. Analyze it to death, and reduce everything to the matter they should actually break through. Some have a larger intuitions about this some don't. This is what I'd say. I am suprised how it affects Leo and that he says it's a stronger psychdelic for him, I've meet many smokers and some are just different, and I love to dovetail theories, sometimes I even leverage the space high for others, and that is why some of my friends even prefered me high, as they had more access to that dimension themselves. Masters/Gurus also at times report doing it and going to spiritual dimensions, if you can do it all natural you'd legit be a "freak of nature", which I would not deny is possible, yet I know from experience using cannabis as a crutch and using it pro-actively is a huge difference. Sorry, in case my message came across in an unemphatic manner, I'd wanted to say that most of the friends I've meet felt uncomfortable, as they were not used to this spiritual "hidden" dimension and their survival cravings and how this is played on on a "trip".