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Hmm. To be honest, it's hard for me to assess your situation without knowing your whole history. But I think that depression often happens because a person have supressed a lot of emotions either through childhood or later in life making them emotionally numb. Processing and integrating these feelings could lift a depression.

That is the million dollar question. I have been reading on forums on people taking ssri´s. It seems that it does something to the receptors. My understanding is that we got a serotonin and dopamine emotional energy system. Dopamine is pleasure and drive (distinct energy) while the serotonin system is attachment and love (distinct energy). Women have higher estrogen which makes them get higher serotonin then men and vice versa. That is why they are more caring then men. I think that ssri´s could fuck up the serotoninerg part of the emotional energy system, making people emotionally numb. Its probably poison.. If you just google long term withdrawal symptoms ssri after quitting, there is a lot of anecdotes. We have actually very little clue about how the brain and nervous system precisely works. There is probably a LOT of interactions happening that we have noe clue about.. One anecdote was of a guy who used one form of ssri. It worked for a while, I think some years, until it stopped working. They ended up trying many different medications which didn't work. He became suicidal with Anhedonia.. His symptoms got ten times worse than before starting medication.

No, it was really stupid of me.. I really fucked up... I have had a really good experience with the dark net places upon that point. Buying good drugs for probably 10 years. But these days it just seems that the drug markets are flooded with fake drugs. Just look at all the fentanyl, fake benzes etc. Its really fucked up..

Ohh, that's cool. Maybe its some genetic thing, but some people have tripping destroyed for life after taking ssri´s.

No problem. The LSD was sourced at a dark net marketplace. I never thought about fake drugs, but It seems like its starting to become the norm, sadly...

Problem with NBOMe is that's a full agonist and have a high neurotoxicity. It literally felt like my brain was frying. It felt like I have ingested poison into my system. It just felt really wrong. If this was actually happening or something I was imagining, I don't know..

It was back in the start of January.

Are you using SSRI´s? I have seen a lot of anecdotes of people who have taken SSRI and never been able to trip afterwards. Some people have gone 5 years without antidepressants and still not being able to trip.

How to argue against science? I am a bit frustrated that scientists have so much authority in our society, when they are pretty clueless about what is going on. I think narcissism in academia is holding society back. Science could be so much better than what it is today. I saw Leos video on science, but at the same time I would like to be able to to argue against science with very concrete and specific examples that layman and scientists have a hard time arguing against. Does anybody have some arguments against science? These are some of my points: A lucid dream is as physical as reality. The phenomenological quality of the sensory modalities are the same, and are sometimes even better (for example brighter colors). A dream is just as physical as normal waking state. But the physical laws are not the same. It is for example possible to swim in space In a black hole, all of our models and scientific understanding breaks down. This shows that science have limits Science dosent work after we are dead. Again, limited Science is based upon fundamental assumptions that haven´t been tested empirically. For example cause and effect. If there is a cause and an effect, there must be a cause for our universe and that cause needs to have a cause which will regress into infinity. Language is based on the fundamental assumption that there is a sender and a receiver. Logic and rationale are human qualities which is placed upon reality. Reality isn’t logical nor rational. All science is based upon logic.

Yeah. when you learn about science in academia they always say it's about probabilities. But the way that it is used in society and understood by people in general is that scientific evidence is truth. Science if models of subjective phenomenology. I think that you can sort the different sciences into "tiers" of accuracy of the models. The more concepts you lay over each other, the more the data will be distorted. The more factors involved the harder it is to draw a conclusion. Classical physics for example will be easy to replicate because what you measure will often be constant. There are som outliers like quantum mechanics, but the mathematics and physics of sending a rocketship to the moon will mostly be the same. These sciences are mechanical. And it has only one layer. In medicine, you have "objective" parameters you measure in the body. On top of this you have the persons unique biology, enoviremental factors and genetics. This are two layers of distortion. In psychology you could have the persons genetics, enoviremental factors, culture etc. The more correlating factors, the more distortions. Regarding the replication crisis, I think that this is a big red flag. But when I discuss this with scientists it's just being brushed off like nothing. The way I see it is that a lot of science is actually relativism. And a lot of value disappears and insight disappears when you compress information. The reason to argue (but which is also low vibration), is that when you discuss something that isn't scientifically proven you just meet a wall of scientist or science fanatics saying "is it proven?", "could it be placebo?", "I don't believe that if its not based upon science" and it get brushed off like it is nothing. I think this is kind of sad...

Long story short. Though I took some LSD. It was bitter, but tought it was the blotter ink. I felt pretty fast that this wasn't LSD. On the comedown it felt like somebody had put gasoline and other dissolving chemicals into my brain. It felt like mye nervous system was getting fried. It was a terrible feeling. Could I have done permanent damage to myself? Could it be that my sensory nerves are getting less sensitive?

Talked to my doctor today. She has previously specialized in drug abuse. She told me that she was skeptical that I could have hurt my serotonin system over this one incident. She said that the body could handle a lot of drugs, but there could be some serotonergic disturbance for a little time. I am starting to feel a lot better also. Lesson of the story, always test the drugs you are taking.

I have heard that some people who have taken SSRI´s are not able to trip on psychedelics. Is that true?

Bought them on a dark net market. Reviews looked good..

I dont know. But it is the shittiest feeling that some other person is responsible for causing me harm over profit. But at the same time, it was stupid of me not testing blotters. Have never had any problem with psychedelics before. Have done psychedelics for over 10 years.

But you are sure it is not possible that it destroys serotonin receptors? Isn't it neurotoxic? But if serotonin receptors are destroyed, will they come back?

I had them under my tongue. I have read a lot of 25i-NBOMe trip reports, and what I experienced was very similar. I have taken LSD hundreds of times. I am 100% certain this was not LSD. What I have read online is that since it is a very strong agonist (95%), it could destroy serotonin receptor sites. Could these receptors rebuild if I stay away from drugs?

Before I write, I just want to preface that I am sorry if I am not allowed to ask for help for a school paper. I am studying in university to become a psychologist and we are about to write a paper in social psychology class. I have always been into spirituality and I have been really interested in spiral dynamics since I first was introduced to the concept from Leo. The paper will be termed "Why do we get cultural clash from multiculturalism?" The main theory will be spiral dynamics where I will talk about it´s background, empirical method and theory, and tie it to under-categories of social thinking, social influence, social relations and group processes. What I think is really relevant for the paper is to explain what purpose the different levels of development serves for our species. Why do we go through the different levels? Why is it adaptive for human as a species and in an evolutionary standpoint? What is it´s function? Is there any source about this that would work in a empirical written paper? I would appreciate relevant topics I could discuss in the paper that is tied to social psychology.

So I had this terrible headache from a meditation session about 8 years ago (you could read about it in my older posts). I have been doing a lot of stuff to get better. Holotropic and LSD therapy have helped me a lot. When I have used those methods, I have started shaking a lot in my pelvis. I though the problem with the headache was that the energy was stuck in the head, but the case has been that my lower energy centers have shut down. I think I might have disassociated from my genitals and lower chakras, so the energy have no place to go resulting in headache. I was wondering if somebody knew any techniques I could use to open up the lower chakras so the energy could flow through the body easier? I am open for everything

Right now I dont know what to do. The past year has been very hard for me. Earlier I had severe problems with drugs and alcohol, and I remember that I thought I was going to become a drug addict. When I started meditation, my life turned around. Suddenly I did very good in school which got me into one of the top 5 universities in my country. I started to work out, eat healthy and shed all of my bad habits. I meditated 1 hour a day. There was almost none resistance to life. About one year ago one of my meditation sessions went very deep. I felt some pretty bad emotions and a pressure came in my forehead. I thought of quitting the session, but in the end I decided to just sit it out. After this session everything changed. When I tried to meditate, it was very hard to do it. The flow I usually felt 5-10 minutes into the meditation session for the past 2 years disappeared. 1-2 months after this session I had a hard time meditating for more than 20 minutes. The pressure was in my forehead constantly. Sometimes it felt like something solid was stuck inside my head. I also had a headache where the skull meets the neck. Slowly I fell back to the person I was before. I started to drink and smoke weed. I had a very hard time studying and got very bad grades as well. Life became very depressing. I have read very much about this topic and have tried many different things the last year like: the dissolving method, taijiwuxqigong, reiki healing, acupuncture, energy therapies and massages. I feel like it has gotten some better (like the headache is almost gone), but the pressure is still there and I am still struggling with my meditation. Right now it seems like I am going to fail many of my classes at university. I feel like the life I am living right now is not worth living (I am actually thinking about what ways to kill myself). There is a battle in my mind. I get it that meditation is not always a walk on the rainbows and that it has its ups and downs, but one year feels like a bit to long and it dosent seem like it is going away anytime soon. I also know that I should not want anything from meditation and for long periods I have tried it, but it never worked. I am thinking about quitting school and travel to meet people who can help me resolve this issue. I preferably want to live with a master (for free would be good) in the US or maybe China or somewhere. Does anyone know how I could do this and if there is any good masters out there? Does anyone know about this problem or know some books about this problem? (I have read Tao of letting go by Bruce Frantzis)

It kind of feels like the problem is in my eyes. The first time I experienced the pressure I felt a pressure in my eyes. It was like the lens in my eyes fell out of order or something. It is hard to describe. Does anyone know about this issue?

The pressure is there 24/7. I have been to a doctor and taken several tests, but apparently there is nothing wrong with me. When I stop meditating for some weeks the pressure slowly disappears so I am pretty sure it is linked to meditaton. I know that you get used to the way meditation affects your life. To me it is just that meditation stopped working like it used to one year ago. I struggle to sit 20-25 minutes a day. Before, I could sit for over an hour a day easily. Before I had no trouble doing school work. Today I barely do what is obligatory. It feels like I am walking backwards.

What kind of psychological reasons could it be? I am trying to accept it and I have gone 2-3 months thinking positively about it, but it still is/was there. I know that life have its ups and downs but with the pressure comes a kind of thought spin. It is like I cant observe my thoughts. It wasnt that I was happy all the time before, just that I could observe my negative and positive emotions. I did not fight the reality before, but now I am.

I know that it changes and I am watching it. But it has never stopped once the past year..

I am not freaked out by it, but it starts to frustrate me and it has lasted for a long time.