Nahm

A parent is suffering but suppresses rather than inspects. Their child creates an idea of who they are, like all kids, but it includes who ‘they must be’ based on unknowingly coping with the emotional suppression of themself and the parent. The child grows up doubly suppressing, and doubly copes by creating an over inflated self image. The become stuck in an inner tug of war between seeking the good feeling, and upholding that self image. They inevitably choose how they feel over their concept of themself, either from the toll this takes on their relationships, or their health. The hypersensitive part still eludes me. They seem to go from non-sensitive to realizing sensitivity, understanding & changing behaviors, and the body of course follows in terms of healing from within. As to why they would have let it go so long, there is a unique increasing avoidance of people and relationships, due to the opportunity for self understanding. Maybe you mean they are hypersensitive toward others, in terms of mechanisms like deflection & projection...?

@SamC Great share. Good to bring into the light and understand. In the vein of dealing with this societally it’s important to keep the following in mind... “While it's true that the recipients of the most annoying of the narcissist's traits—an inflated sense of self-importance, an overwhelming need for admiration and a lack of empathy toward others—suffer emotionally...the narcissist himself actually suffers physically from higher levels of the stress hormone cortisol...perhaps it's the pressure of trying to keep up a front: narcissists, although they come across as conceited, boastful or pretentious, often feel fragile and humiliated on the inside. “ https://www.healthywomen.org/content/blog-entry/narcissism-bad-your-health Like many psychological issues involving a front, it’s important to recognize the suffering going on as what is seen & heard most often tells the opposite story, which can be manipulative or intimidating without the understanding and knowledge of what to look for. It’s also important imo, to be mindful of the distinction that the behaviors do not define the entity. Seeing who one really is, through the behaviors can be very empowering, especially if one is inclined to help. @SamC @ivankiss @NoSelfSelf @Keyhole @Preety_India Maybe you guys can offer some clarity... I’ve worked with narcissism in sessions and found much healing & change in being more sensitive. With others, but more specifically in terms self talk / inner monologue. Every time (so far) there was a physically limiting ailment which got worse over time, and they ‘hardened’ in ignoring it, rather than being hypersensitive. It has always turned out to be a previously un-inspected unresolved offshoot of a parent(s) / upbringing. So I’m finding the hypersensitive and narcissist facets to be at odds. What am I missing there? Thanks!

@cannedsoup Happy to help. Here’s the link again just in case you missed it. I would give them a once over. One will ‘click’. Enjoy!

I’ve broken many bones and had hundreds of stitches. Broken both collar bones twice even. Might seem very counterintuitive, but I don’t cope. I find coping to perpetuate. I instead feel it, release it, let it go from mind, and focus on what does feel good to me. I found the Buddha’s teachings of the distinction between pain & suffering most insightful. Wishing you the best.

It’s not about the thoughts, it’s about the body releasing conditioning. “Pushing through” is a conditioned mindset to let go of. Relaxation is meditative. Meditation is relaxing. Letting go is effortless, not effortful. When emotional misunderstanding releases, have a good cry and let it out. If you can’t, write about how you feel, and let it out. If you can’t, talk to someone and express how you feel, and let it out. There is no “facing radical truth”, “metaphysical suicide”, etc. It can seem like it from years of conditioning & suppressing. We adapt and don’t notice this, so it can be a lot to let go of. But that’s the point, and the more you let go of, the better you feel, and the less you fear. The radical truth is love, loving you, flushing the conditioning out. A mindset of ‘facing it’ is making an opposition of it. The ‘scared’ is emotional suppressing. The emotional scale is a great way to understand. It’s empowering to be able to move up the scale, to know how and do it anytime. Like riding a bike, it becomes second nature with some practice & understanding. The body mind eventually does it automatically as needed in subtle ways. It’s most worthwhile. It’s also not about faith, determination or conviction. It’s about beginning to feel, remaining present, or returning to being present again & again. The more you feel and understand yourself, with tools like the emotional scale, the clearer it is that there is no problem or anything to be scared of. It’s good that it’s coming up...notice the mind’s narrative, which essentially is the habit of suppressing the feeling, and let it out. Try a variety of meditations, one will ‘click’ with you. Don’t try to ‘force’ one style or practice into place. One of those meditations will ‘click’ ‘subconsciously’ with a specific suppressed emotion. This kind of does the work ‘behind the scenes’ for you in a big way.

@cannedsoup More or less, yes. There’s a link with some meditations if you’re interested. Some of the details might be insightful or helpful.

Meanwhile...God fucks around in forrest.

Gorgeous.

@Frenk Thank you! ??

Ism. Lucidity.

@Frenk See the best in everything & everyone everyday. All excuses not to will naturally come up and out. No expectation of permanent shifts. Just actual you. No games. Goodness. ♥️ The Goodness IS you, There is no “you” which awakens.

“We should really honour the diversity of contemplative practices that are available, because they all do different things, and people would have a much better chance of matching what they need, if they had a bigger buffet of choices.” Each person should choose the best technique – and the correct “dose” – for their particular situation, rather than doggedly pursuing a plan that is not working. Found one resonating passage in that article. ?? Meditations Someone should let them know about this... The Emotional Scale.

See the best in everything & everyone everyday. All excuses not to will come up and out. No findable permanent shifts. Just actual you. No games. Goodness. ♥️

@Loving Radiance And This. ?

Enjoy the trips, also, inspect beliefs, uncover assumptions. Consider looking to what is actual in direct experience, rather than thinking & believing about it. Unwrap ‘the now’ like a present. Maybe this is the oneness consciousness and you’re assuming it isn’t? What then is the ‘wrapping paper’? Maybe you’re busied trying to convince yourself of concepts, but haven’t noticed there are not two of you? It would be more sensible to be trying to convince someone else. Incessant thinking & beliefs are like a movie. Directly experiencing awareness is like directly experiencing the screen, without the screens activity of being a movie. You, prior to birth, conditioning, identifying, assumptions, beliefs, etc. Do Nothing meditation begins with the notion that this is already the oneness consciousness. In this light the veiling activity of the mind is readily spotted. When this occurs it is often recommended one practices meditation oriented toward quieting the mind, and grounding in feeling, and returning to Do Nothing at a later point. The difference between thinking & believing, and actually feeling source, is like the difference between the thought of shitting yourself, and the universe literally shitting ‘your’ self. The meditative mind receives insights, in the peaceful clarity where the thinking & believing used to be. Without inspecting thoughts, assumptions, etc, that carousel of twoness just keep spinning, and one doesn’t notice one is on it. One wouldn’t even know there is a matrix. Wouldn’t know what ‘sneakiness’, or ‘authentic’ point to. Imagine if right now you suddenly hilariously delightfully realized you’ve been madly, wildly, insanely, viscerally head over heals in love for a couple decades - but just now noticed for the first time. Imagine the wonder and awe, and also the shocking profundity you’d experience as to how it is possible that you somehow ever missed this, until just now. And twenty seconds later it slips away, and you’re back on the carousel, none the wiser, not knowing there is a matrix. It varies greatly depending on who you ask, which is why only a peaceful clear mind & direct experience will do.

@Javfly33 ...What @abrakamowse said is of course accurate, only direct experience will do. Sharing wise, I directly experience this and have been for quite a while. Admittedly funny but I didn’t know how to refer to it when it first happened, so I called it ‘whoosh’ or ‘whooshing’. If you search whoosh there are some old posts. That’s just what it felt like and the word that came to mind. It’s amazing feeling and in hindsight I’d say it’s ideal to be ok with the non-locality of yourself. Again, just sharing, and respectfully, only direct experience will do, but I’ve experienced it both ways. Me whooshing into someone else, and someone else whooshing into me. I also experience this with people as other people, from other times or past lives showing stuff to me, to show to them. I readily admit this sounds crazy and is unbelievable. I don’t even believe in time or past lives. It wasn’t something I’d even thought of and it wasn’t something I tried. The first time it just happened, and like any other experience much is “known” in the hindsight of having experienced it. I believe meditation & psychedelics were the biggest part of opening the mind, and then Reiki classes were a big part of developing (which really is just being there and it happens) siddhis etc with other people non-trip wise. There’s no more a me ‘doing it’ than there is sharing this. Might be helpful to someone. Tried to ‘push’ a bit on this thread admittedly but didn’t seem like anyone was interested in exploring. I try to be most mindful & respectful to the maker of the threads /asker of the question because it expands reality, but don’t want to be too ‘pushy’. Always a fine line.

The loving everything & everyone everyday.

I knew a guy once who judged everything & everyone everyday. Like nothing was ever good enough for him or something. He said he decided to love everything & everyone everyday and it worked.

@Tal ??

@BipolarGrowth Will pm ya. ?

Without materialism, mysticism points to nothing.

Those thoughts appear, now. That idea appears, now. That wall, appears, now. But ‘wall’ is a thought. Perception is not, and can not be, thought. “Perception”, is a thought, which appears, now. The word, or thought, “perception”, points to what “that wall” really is.

Consciousness is the awareness, of that belief. Consciousness appears as knowledge, but is infinite & thus can not be conceptualized. You can make just about anything out of legos...except the legos. No one, no thing, nor no no thing, is tricking you. One tricks oneself, with concepts, of oneself.

Enlightenment is not a thing, and is only veiled by the thoughts which support, that you are a thing. Enlightenment can never happen to you. Enlightenment is such that no one gets “enlightened”. There is only enlightenment. There are no “enlightened people”. No one’s understanding of the universe (duality) is as direct as your direct experience right now, as the universe (nonduality). Awakening happens every single day. You’re wakefulness right now.

@Grappler If those perspectives aren’t working for you, choose more aligned, better feeling to you, perspectives. Hate doesn’t create, and has no power, no actuality, and no source. Undo, unlearn, unfocus the pattern of belief & perspective that working makes you a ‘slave’. It actually is freedom. It is the creating of the life you want. You might think of this as ‘getting out of your own way’.