Nahm

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It’d be most beneficial instead (just opinion here) to go outside, breathe it all in and notice - that / this, is flat out fucking impossible. Every single explanation is absolutely wrong as in not it. Kensho might be a thought, sure, but Kensho can not be thought.

@RMQualtrough Might sound redundant or even critical, not meant that way… if everything is said to come from nothing, or if nothingness is a foundation, then these are properties, features, facets, aspects, etc, and nothing is no longer nothing, but is now misappropriated as “that which” is two, -and- has properties, features, facets, aspects, etc. (As pointings of course, great, no ‘issue’.) If there is one thing in or by which infinity resides, then there is either not that one thing, or there is not infinity, or there is neither… but by definition there can’t be both. Yes on the “deep sleep” pointing. When one is “awake” God is asleep, so to speak, so all “awakenings” are seen as delusion / duality. That appears to be a very ‘way down the path’ comment or perspective, but that is the ‘sneakiness’ (if you will) of now, or we might say, of now vs experience, in the opening the door sense to identifying by “a past” or “a future”. Because deep sleep is being said to be a property of nothingness, which is then no longer nothingness. Even ‘literal’ upon nothingness implies a ‘not literal’. Otherwise, if I am caught up in language here and that is precisely what you’re saying, then just - yep. Because ‘it’ is never things, ‘consciousness’ is kind of the ultimate pointer, such that consciousness can inspect and realize there is no actuality of separation / things. Also, consciousness, or awareness, points to the most prior, and then the label also goes. What is or would therefore be aware of awareness, or conscious of this consciousness (minus the dualistic implication via language there). Also - the instant consciousness realizes it is consciousness which can never come, go, awaken, fall asleep, yada yada, eternity is ‘realized’. Even ‘the underlying’ must go. It is not possible to have mind before matter. Matter = Mind. Mind = matter. ‘Matter’ is just a thought, a label. Inevitably, so too is Mind, as in finite and or infinite. Points back to the ultimate pointing of “consciousness’. Again though, might be saying the same thing here… and also, me saying whatever seems to be being said must also be ‘seen through’ / cancelled out. Not a word of it is true. It’s literally being made up ‘on the fly’. Edit: reply to your last comment… there are no “humans”…there is no “relative viewpoint”… there is no “void”! That is all consciousness… and even that label (consciousness) must go.

But even by inference… what literally does not exist (nonexistence) simply isn’t, and can not even be inferred. “If a tree falls in the woods and no one is there to hear it, did it make a sound?” Points to that the tree, ear & sound are all (equally / parallel) vibration. There is no duality of observer / observed. There is no ‘the two together’, the seeming two are One. Same factor… there is no observer, only the thought that there is. Scrutinize direct experience… is that thought - ‘that there is an observed’ - that very thought ‘itself’… is it ‘observed’ in any separate manor really? Is there a separation of any kind present? Is there the direct experience of a ‘dormant observer’ in deep sleep or an aesthetic? Or is there the hindsight thought / assumption that there is? Not that there is a separate body mind, but analogously… if the body mind so to speak, RMQualtrough, right now appeared as John Doe… the thought might arise ‘for’ ‘John Doe’ - where did RMQualtrough go? Another approach… what you’re saying about deep sleep and an aesthetic isn’t evidence for an observer which is dormant, but is evidence that there really is no ‘time’. No time passed… but if it is believed time passed… then the mind if you will, fills in with an explanation, for that which is unexplainable & being the very explanation and mind it’s arising in. If nothing is said to have a property it is not being said to be nothing. What is not two of course can not - does not even know - ‘sleep’. Asleep & awake are a mental duality. All “awakening” and or “awakenings” is / are mental duality, thought attachment, monkey mind (a bit extreme language for emphasis). Finger & moon situation. God be’s by not being and sleeps by not sleeping. Also, if it is said awareness comes and goes in any way or manor… and that is based on direct experience… then what is being said is that awareness is aware of awareness coming & going, thus awareness doesn’t / isn’t coming & going.

How would ya know if ya found it, since what is said to be potentially found - does not exist by definition of the inquiry?

@Someone here The word existence gets used both ways. Sometimes as ‘reality’ or ‘appearance’, and sometimes as Being.

See a doctor of course, and also, sometimes pride can seem to prevent us from moving forward.

Even ‘can be anything’ would be a limit. Yes, pretty much every religion. God = no thing, nothing, nothingness. But then likewise “necessitating infinite everything ness” is a self imposed limit. If there is a nothing, that is a duality. If not, there isn’t.

If you are being conscious minds, the start, and the universe… if there is only now…are there really these? If there are not these, then cessation is simply the absence of the thoughts about there being these. Even the thought ‘cessation’ could be entertained to be other than now. Likewise, perhaps cessation lies within the absence of the thought - “consciousness”. (Then there isn’t dormant / not dormant, nor conscious of / not conscious of.) This too could then be seen to be an ever so subtle veil of thought labelling. Eternal being might think itself to be time, infinite being might think itself to be space. Yet, if “being” can not think itself… And likewise, if nothing is what all things or anything resides in, then it is not per se nothing, as that albeit ever so subtly, defines / labels. Indeed. Yet……how funny would it be if it’s like, just, literally not at all serious? If “The Big It” is regular ol’ you already, that’d be one hell of a joke. A humor-cessation, some might say.

@Zigzag Idiot Thanks!

@sda Yes, thanks, just taking a little space, a breather so to speak. Quite a tragedy indeed.

How can I fully love this experience? (The human experience I am having). Instead of hating It? The hate is of arising, appearing, thoughts. Conditioning. Thoughts which do not jive with the truth within you, which is of the heart. If you hold your hand on a hot stove, you will not like the burn, and you will eventually remove your hand from the stove. If you hold your attention on thoughts which do not feel good to you, you will eventually remove your focus from those thoughts and focus on thoughts and activities which do feel good to you. My one vote, my advice or suggestion, is to do so swiftly. Not to linger & dwell. Not to attempt to solve with more thoughts in kind. You are love, you are the creator. No thought less will do. See who you really are. Question that which is appearing as.

Spot on, as always. Beautiful.

We get to passion, love, empowerment, freedom and enthusiasm by first getting to contentment. This is counterintuitive at first, as we get to contentment not by any doing or solving, not by any thinking... but by letting go of all of it, by relaxing, by giving it to love when it’s become to much for us to handle. We get to contentment by shifting focus away from thoughts - to seeing, hearing, breathing and feeling. The thoughts must be aloud to settle. The resistance felt is not about who you are. The thoughts about you are not true. The resistance in feeling is the all-too-tangible literal evidence of the truth of feeling, that these thoughts about you are not true about who you really are. Who you really are is unconditional. Unconditional can not meet you in these conditions held in mind, or, focused on in thought. Talk to someone. Talk to me today if you like, (no charge). Express to let go. Nothing is need of solving. Let go and allow well being is, allow comfort in, allow the love in. The true nature floats like a cork, when no longer held done by the focus on these conditions, these beliefs about itself. They don’t hold any water, and they don’t hold this love back - but boy do we feel that resistance when we’ve momentarily lost our way. Everyone who has ever lived has been there. You are not alone my friend. We’re all with you. We support you. We believe in you. We can not let go for you. We can not choose to talk to someone for you. We can not express and release for you. We can only tell you do not lose faith, do not give up on hope. There is so much love here for you.

Head full of questions, how can you measure up, to deserve affection, to ever be enough for this existence; when did it get so hard? Your heart is beating, alive and breathing - and there’s a reason why. You are essential, not accidental! And you should realize - you are beloved! I wanted you to know - you are beloved! Let it soak into your soul! Forget the lies you heard, rise above the hurt, and listen to these words; You are beloved! I wanted you to know! You are beloved! You are beloved! Sometimes a heart can feel like a heavy weight; it pulls you under and you just fall away. Is anybody gonna hear you call? But there´s a purpose under the surface, and you don’tt have to drown! Let me remind you; this love will find you! Let it lift you out! You are beloved! I wanted you to know! You are beloved! Let it soak into your soul! Forget the lies you heard! Rise above the hurt! Listen to these words! You are beloved! I wanted you to know! You are beloved! Don’t be afraid. Don’t let hope fade. Keep your eyes fixed on the light above. In the heartbreak, in your mistakes, nothing can separate you from love. You are beloved!

Nor did I say it was. You quoted me, but cut off what was said after the word “or”. Here is what was said: “I have never supported the notion or concept of Mahāsamādhi, or, the conscious death’, but offered clarity on the misunderstanding.” The topic of this thread is “Soonhei (Member of this community) killed himself to experience Conscious Death.” I apologize that I am able to comment on this thread and you are not.

I did not and am not saying you or anyone edited his comment upon logging in some days after his passing. I am saying the comment I replied to was edited after I replied. If he did this, I do not know why he would have anymore than I know why he took his life. I looked into this and unfortunately a digital history or record of edited private messages is not available. Again I am very sorry for your loss. It is a tragic and devastating event and my mind and heart are with you and your family. It is in these precise ways that communication by text such as these threads online is very limiting and leaves much room for miscommunication and misunderstanding. I apologize that this thread is locked, and that I am able to comment and you are not. If you ever want to talk through skype or zoom I welcome that and you can reach me anytime through my website email. The link is below each post. @Muhammad Jawad I am very sorry for your loss as well, and I apologize that I did not say this already. My best friend through my teenage years and on, from whom I learned to play guitar from and had music and just about everything in common with committed suicide as well and it was difficult to bear. I wish you and your family peace as well.

@SoonHei Again, I am very sorry for your loss. What you are sharing is not the direct communication, it is an edited after the fact, more than once, communication. When I received your message, I messaged Leo asking if it is possible to see the editing history, to try to make some sense of this. Like you, I could only speculate as to his ‘why’, because whatever that why might have been, it was of his private thoughts. I do not agree that he trusted in my guidance. If suicide was the ‘lessor of two evils’, I have always suggested expression, talking with someone, taking advantage of all resources available, letting go vs carrying the weight. If his actions were of the thinking of ‘conscious death’, I have commented multiple times offering clarity on this misunderstanding. Making a dreamboard is indicative of what I suggest, and is about living and creating consciously. I am not per se an advocate of even the “ego death” lingo. Also, in terms of trusting my guidance, he never reached out to talk as in have a session. I wish he would have, perhaps he would have opened up if he was carrying a weight, or perhaps found clarity on the “conscious death” philosophy. Again I am speculating here. This medium of communication is very limiting. I am on the road in the country presently and reception is hit or miss. If however you are interested in chatting on Skype in the future I welcome that.

@SoonHei Very sorry for your loss. In all fairness, it should also be disclosed that his message was edited more than once after I replied. I do not know by who, only that it was. My posts are visible and searchable. I have never supported the notion or concept of Mahāsamādhi, or, the conscious death’, but offered clarity on the misunderstanding.

@Wilhelm44 Nonduality means not two. The term points without defining. When comparing that which already seems to be defined, it is already missed there are, not two. There is not someone who knows this, nor someone to fully realize nonduality. ‘People self realized’, would be two. This has not only been covered extensively on this forum, it is literally the only apparent content of it.

@ivankiss ?? ♥️

@Tim R Indeed. Beautiful.

@ivankiss (If I might) not a wrong ‘how’. Being...thought...in and of itself is inherently, as in feel for oneself now, check ‘direct experience’, intuitively, ‘off’. Or, being already is thought, and thus can not be thunk.

Never resolved by diagnosis as individual separate selves. That feeds into the very heart of the suffering and perpetuates. Only the truth, or true nature will do. Not adding delusion, judgement, isolations, etc. Treat symptoms, ease symptoms, rather than weave an identity.

@Muhammad Jawad So very sorry for your loss. I’ve no ‘answers’ beyond what @RMQualtrough already stated.