Shin

Spiritual awakening isn't an activity, a lifestyle or a goal. It isn't an activity because once you realize that you are which is aware of the mind, and not the mind itself, there is nothing you can do. Living in the present moment, being conscious/aware, alert, is your natural state (which is not a state, but language). Until then it feels like doing something, like forcing yourself to be conscious, because you're still fundamentally believing you're a mind trying to get rid of its content. If you see clearly that you aren't the mind, even if it's active, dumb and negative, it really doesn't matter to what you really are. So the best way to actually have a peaceful mind, is to stop to be mad at yourself for not being peaceful, accept that it's the case and just be present. Notice that I didn't say a "clear mind" or an "empty mind". This is a fantasy, a goal that you're pursuing, which puts in the futur (which doesn't exist) the discovery of your true nature, which doesn't depend on having a clear mind at all. It isn't a particular lifestyle, because the only thing you're "doing" is being conscious. Sure you may stop some activities, but only because they are neurotics, hurting you, or that you weren't really interested in doing them in the first place. So going into an Ashram, to a retreat, taking Ayahuasca, becoming a monk/zen student, all of this is unnecessary and can actually be a huge distraction for the ego. Your mind loves to associate itself to communities, dogmas, and mental positions, so doing anything that you consider "spiritual" is by definition a delusion. There is no activity that is spiritual, because spirituality is just being conscious and realizing more deeply your true nature, which is totally independent of any activities whatsoever. It isn't a goal, because a goal implies that you're not already yourself, and that you can train yourself to be it. Back to the first point, it can feel like that until you know what you are, but once you do, meditation and other spiritual practices are the same exact thing as being present. Notice this, it is the same thing, which means you can self-inquire/meditate or whatever wherever you are and whatever you do ! It can't be a goal because the only way to deepen your realization is to be here, now, present. This is beautiful because you don't have to worry or to stress yourself anymore to get it or to chase it. You may ask: "But wtf is he talking about, I clearly am not Enlightened !" In a sense you aren't, but see this more like a continuum than a binary system. Sure, there is a clear threshold which has a massive change in perspective, but for most people this happens gradually … It's not even actually happening, you're just realizing what you always were, even when you were totally inconscious you were it the all time ! There is a huge downside to expect this massive shift in consciousness, it makes you chase after an experience, which is not different than chasing happiness in traditional means like relationships/money/sex/drugs. If you can already not associate your sense of self with thoughts and emotions, then stop chasing and just be present. If you really want to do something, do this, whatever you do go deeper in it. Don't chase anything, just be totally and utterly uninterested about the past and the future. Even things you want to do in 5 minutes, even in 5 seconds, 1 second … Whatever you need to do throughout your day you will remember if it really matters to you, you don't need to think about it ! Live in the present moment so fully, that you can't chase anything anymore, because there is nothing to chase if you're content and fulfilled by resting as yourself. If you can actually manage to get to that point, then enlightenment is only a matter of time, because the very nature of the illusive sense of self is seeking ...

https://www.trinfinityacademy.com/courses/enlightenment-1-part-2-person-wakes-up-to-presence/lesson-10-there-is-only-now/ ? ?

Don't forget to watch your hand

10 baby days strong

Everything you can think of is possible. Even the things you can't.

What is this supposed to mean ? ?

One day ! Oh wait …

Please realize this !

Love you too

2 hours in the morning, 2 hours in the afternoon, and 1 hour in the evening. Waking up at 6:30AM. Walking for 1h a day Meditate 30 minutes in the cold No eating in the morning and no snacks between meals. This is the things that I want to become a habit (again) before next monday. Probably too much to expect, but you can't go to the moon if you shoot the earth

I don't know your name or what you look like, but I want to help you. How do you explain this ?

Spamming because it's just so good

Nothing to say, So I'll just this here …

Life is a joke for him. I want it to be a joke too ?

They are all suffering greatly because of it. Very few people enter a relationship without being needy. So of course, from most people point of view, relationships and sex is necessary for their happiness.

If you suck with women, no matter how hard you work on yourself, there will always be a part of you that won't be fully open and therefore limit your potential growth. In your mind, women will still be seen as immensely valuable and worth pursuing, which will weight in your subconscious on some level. There is only two ways out of this, which are deeply connected: 1: Find out if you're using this as an excuse and are lying to yourself, and if you do, be very conscious that you actually still hold the belief that women will make you happy and fulfilled. There will be a paradox where you will know intellectually, even intuitively that it's never gonna work, but experientially you will still feel like you need one in your life. So basically, brings a lot of awareness on this, meditate a lot too. You need to be brutally honest with yourself. 2: Practice the skills needed to be attractive to women (Leo has a video on this). The more genuinely attractive you become (no manipulations) the more detached you are from women. You do this for you, not for them, because all the 5 factors that attract women like crazy are a reflection on how free and happy you are on the inside. You can't be confident if you never achieved things you wanted to do in the past. You can't be (truly) humorous if you have a sad and pessimistic view on life. You can't be adventurous if you fear to go out of your comfort zone. You can't be detached from outcome if you aren't secure and emotionally grounded, And you can't be good in bed if you can't let go and fully embrace the animal side in you. Ultimately both of those advices can only work if you socialize, hook up and date women, it's only by failing and suffering that you will understand they will never fulfill you, Which in turns makes you want to focus even more on the above points. You can't just do one and not the other. If you only do the first, you will actually end up lying to yourself on how you don't need them. If you only do the second, you will end up being successful with women but still being needy (even if you hide it like a god), Because if you forgot the first point, you will dismiss the detachment part, the real deep detachment, not the surface level you think you have. When you'll truly feel they can't make you happier, then you'll be able to truly choose if you want or not to be near them. You will always be pulled toward them though, it doesn't matter if you're internally free, you're still one side of the coin energetically speaking, But at least you will never confuse again the pull for salvation, for something that is required for you to be happy in life. The decision will be about what you want to focus or not, if you have time or not, if you genuinely want it, And not about lust or neediness, which are the same thing actually, a feeling of lack in you that needs to be filled, Which will always be there no matter what you do, unless you spiritually awaken.

Seventh day all over again

When she pisses me off, I switch hand.

That's some nice mushrooms you got there.

It's been a while that I didn't thought about this, but I've gone to a mall that is crowded and tried to remember how it was to be me before all of this. What people think of me, who's staring at me, how I look like, what I like or don't like about what I see, what I'm supposed to do tonight/tomorrow or in a month, etc Shocking how different it is. There is almost nothing left, as if there wasn't a person here anymore, almost … I don't even remember how it was to judge and categorize everything, naming everything I see before using it or talking about it. If I'm honest with myself, I've never done a retreat, took a psychedelic, or did self-inquiry on a long enough period. Could it be because I know that If do those, it will be the end of me ? Or is it because I genuinely don't feel the need to do any of it as of now ? Honestly I don't know, I've deceived myself so many times that I can't pronounce myself on this. What I know is that the 2 hours of meditation a day starts to have a profound impact, it is just like the first few months 2 years ago. Those months were I was meditating at least 2 hours a day and forcing myself to be conscious all the time, except now it's effortless. Sometimes I don't even want to do anything and just sit, and it feels more satisfying than anything else I could do. I know I've said that quite a lot, but it still amaze me that doing nothing is more fulfilling than anything else I could do. Who would have thought that just sitting and doing nothing in the dark (not even in nature) could make you blissful ? I can literally feel my body having subtle orgasms within itself, I can't even imagine how infinitely more powerful it can be, but I know it can. Somehow I always end up stopping my meditation shortly after it happens, next time I should let go and see what happens. It's different than going into the "deep sleep zone" and also different than a Kundalini awakening, it feels like infinite love wanting to express itself through me. I say this because the subtle orgasms aren't physical, and it isn't something happening in my mind either (as an emotion), and the only thing I can put a word on it is love. I'm afraid of it.