Raphael

These are parts of its limitations just like other stages. It's probably difficult to accept it for people at stage green because we are directly confronted with these issues in our era, but it's easier to understand the horrors of the past like dictators and slavery because we are out of touch with that. They are not doing what they are doing because they consciously want it, but because they are unconscious. Just as a stage red dictator is unconscious of the suffering that it is doing to others. Billionaires that don't contribute back enough are run by unhealthy emotions and motives but are unconscious of it. It's like an addiction for them, if you ever had a strong addiction you can understand how they feel. They want to feel good and they think that they can feel good by accumulating wealth so they endlessly chase money and success, it's like being addicted to gambling or alcohol, it's super difficult for them to stop, they just cannot help themselves. Many of them are only rich financially, but poor emotionally, they are ignorant and don't know what life is really about. You just need to let go and accept it, just as you can accept the existence of past tyrants and of slavery.

I consider myself as being mostly at stage orange/green. I want to become a millionaire because I'm poor. It will allow me to quit the place where I live, travel, meet interesting people, in summary, to have more opportunities and freedom to self-actualize. Of course, if the richest people in the world where redistributing more money, it would greatly help me to get started, but it is not the case because they are not conscious enough, so I have to do it by myself. Being a millionaire will also help me for enlightenment because I need a proper financial foundation to support myself. However, after enlightenment, I don't know what I will do. If I have a lot of money available, I can create systems to help others to self-actualize. Endless chasing just for success looks futile and dissatisfying, accumulating wealth is more satisfying if it is used to build infrastructures to help mankind to evolve. Concerning the exploitation, it existed since the dawn of time. Stage orange is actually the first one to stop classic slavery. Of course, working 60h per week is also a form of slavery but it's better than the exploitation that happened at previous stages where people were working until their death without receiving anything in return. Stage orange is actually less exploitative than the previous stages, but its environmental impact is much more concerning. Stage orange can also have incredible work ethics. At the beginning of Amazon, Jeff Bezos had working days that would end up at midnight or 1 - 2 AM. I currently work with someone who wakes up at 6 and continues to work until 11 PM - 12 PM because he is so concerned about satisfying its clients. All the technologies and luxuries that we have today and that we are currently using to communicate even if we live on different continents exist thank to stage orange. Stage orange is a necessity and is on what green is built on and will continue to be built on in the future.

31 July 2020 Wake Up Time: 05:41 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 09:35 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ❌ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: 09:00 AM - 09:30 AM: I started the day by a call with my client. Work Duration: 30 minutes 02:51 PM - 02:58 PM: I had a quick call with my client. Work Duration: 7 minutes Deep Work Sessions: 09:54 AM - 11:34 AM: I worked on the stripe payment. It's almost completed. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 40 minutes 11:47 AM - 01:16 AM: I continued the stripe integration. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 29 minutes 02:19 PM - 02:51 PM: I almost completed the stripe integration. I got a call near the end. Deep Work Duration: 32 minutes 03:19 PM - 05:01 PM: I completed the Stripe integration, but it created another on the validation page. I will maybe fix that in the evening if I'm courageous enough. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 42 minutes 07:57 PM - 08:14 PM: I corrected a few bugs. Deep Work Duration: 17 minutes Total Work Duration: 6 hours 17 minutes, including 5 hours 40 minute of Deep Work (objective at least 6 hours) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective 0 minutes, I'm not reading anything currently)

30 July 2020 Wake Up Time: 05:43 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 09:15 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ❌ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: 07:40 AM - 08:23 AM: I worked on my server configuration. 43 minutes 08:23 AM - 08:59 AM: I had a call with my client. We discussed the payment and the work. I often feel like I'm fighting with him to get a proper pay. Work Duration: 36 minutes 08:59 AM - 10:39 AM: I created an invoice template and went back to configuring my server. I've restarted it from zero at the end because I was too confused. Work Duration: 1 hour 40 minutes 11:00 AM - 12:10 AM: I continued the server configuration, I'm still confused. Work Duration: 1 hour 10 minutes 12:15 AM - 01:35 PM: I had a long discussion with my client. Work Duration: 1 hour 20 minutes 02:35 PM - 03:48 PM: I got bored trying to configure the WordPress server and its tools manually. It was taking too much time so I preferred to subscribe to a dedicated service. Work Duration: 1 hour 13 minutes Deep Work Sessions: 04:00 PM - 04:54 PM: I fixed a bug on my client's website, searched for other bugs, but I'm having trouble finding how a bug is happening. Work Duration: 54 minutes @Raphael Focus on the essential, you don't need to go completely into the details. Otherwise, that was a good day. Good job! Total Work Duration: 7 hours 17 minutes, including 54 minute of Deep Work (objective at least 6 hours) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective 0 minutes, I'm not reading anything currently)

29 July 2020 Wake Up Time: 07:07 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 09:30 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ❌ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: 10:13 AM - 10:35 AM: I had a call with my client. He is abusing for the amount of work and the payment. I will stop him if I don't have any news tomorrow or Friday. Work Duration: 22 minutes. 12:30 AM - 01:15 PM: I had a tough negotiation with my client about the payment. I put clear boundaries and forced my position so that I can get a minimum amount. I hope that shit will go fine. Work Duration: 45 minutes Deep Work Sessions: 11:00 AM - 12:29 AM: I corrected some bugs on the website. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 29 minutes I had a message from my client, I will get paid a little less than I expected. I usually like to show compassion and want to be kind and help people, but most people don't care, when they see a genuine being they just want to take advantage. I'm bored of being exploited by people, I will force more and more my will onto them and put clear boundaries in the future. Shit will go my way now. @Raphael Good, you rest properly today. You got lazy to get out of bed this morning, but that's fine as today was not a working day. Keep clear limitations with clients and keep moving forward ♥️ Total Work Duration: 2 hours 36 minutes, including 1 hour 29 minute of Deep Work (objective 0 minutes) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective 0 minutes, I'm not reading anything currently)

I feel the cringe. They are both living in different realities and are unable to recognize the relative trues in each other worldviews.

28 July 2020 Wake Up Time: 05:43 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 09:10 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ❌ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: 09:09 AM - 09:18 AM: I had a quick call with my client. Work Duration: 9 minutes 01:34 AM - 02:09 AM: I had another call with my client. Work Duration: 38 minutes 03:44 PM - 04:03 PM: I had another call with my client. Work Duration: 19 minutes Deep Work Sessions: 08:53 AM - 09:09 AM: I started to work on the review area, but then got interrupted by my client. Deep Work Duration: 16 minutes 09:18 AM - 10:11 AM: I almost completed the review area, but I have one question for my client. I will ask him later. Deep Work Duration: 53 minutes 10:32 AM - 11:46 AM: I started to make the API call, but it seems like there's going to be issues with managing multiple captchas. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 14 minutes 11:57 AM - 12:39 AM: Still working with the captchas. I'm getting the errors that I expected. Deep Work Duration: 42 minutes 02:18 PM - 03:07 PM: I started to do some fixes on the checkout workflow. Deep Work Duration: 49 minutes 03:17 PM - 3:44 PM: I almost completed the checkout flow. Deep Work Duration: 27 minutes 04:08 PM - 04:48 PM: I completed the checkout flow and the review area. Deep Work Duration: 40 minutes @Raphael Good job, you have been very productive today! Keep it up! Total Work Duration: 6 hours 7 minutes, including 5 hours 1 minute of Deep Work (objective at least 6 hours) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective 0 minutes, I'm not reading anything currently)

27 July 2020 Wake Up Time: 06:16 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 09:50 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) Work Sessions: 09:30 AM - 10:41 AM: I went back to the SEO course, I realized that I needed a running online WordPress server to continue the tutorial so started to set up one. I was very distracted at a moment. Work Duration: 1 hour 11 minutes 10:58 AM - 12:12 AM: I had a long call with my client. Work Duration: 1 hour 14 minutes 12:29 AM - 01:20 AM: I continued the WordPress server configuration and got a small call near the end. Work Duration: 51 minutes 02:01 PM - 03:03 PM: I continued the server configuration but wasn't able to set it up. I am very inexperienced with this. I also distracted myself near the end. Work Duration: 1 hour 2 minutes 03:19 PM - 04:11 PM: I went back working on my client website but got super distracted. Work Duration: 52 minutes Deep Work Sessions: 07:26 PM - 09:22 PM: I did some corrections on my client's website and started the review area. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 56 minutes @Raphael Remember, stay focused. When things are taking some time, when things are loading, just do nothing and wait. Minimize your brain efforts and you will progress. Take care ♥️ Total Work Duration: 6 hours 14 minutes, including 1 hour 56 minutes of Deep Work (objective at least 6 hours) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective 0 minutes, I'm not reading anything currently)

26 July 2020 Wake Up Time: 05:37 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 09:05 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ✅ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: No work for today @Raphael Good, you rest properly today Total Work Duration: 0 minutes, including 0 minutes of Deep Work (objective 0 minutes) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective 0 minutes, I'm not reading anything currently)

Strong Determination Sitting This meditation technique is super powerful. I meditated for one hour every day for several months, I was using the do-nothing technique, it was quite challenging but I got used to it. So I wanted to change a little and started to experience with the Strong Determination Sitting technique and it was like hell, I couldn't even do it for 30 minutes most of the time. The maximum that I did was 35 minutes. I think I will continue with this technique and push it to one hour, it's very powerful and I see a lot of potentials. Here's a quick video about it: https://youtu.be/EHI1aPUxs4s

Study computer science on your own a little before going to work and a little after work Create a few small projects When you consider that you have the minimum experience, search for a job in the field as a junior software developer Explain your situation to your future employers and show your projects, personal projects are more important than any degree in the software industry. The people will maybe understand you, have some compassion, and accept you in their company

25 July 2020 Wake Up Time: 06:59 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 09:26 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ❌ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: 02:11 PM - 02:50 PM: I started back the SEO course. I was distracted a lot. Work Duration: 39 minutes 02:52 PM - 04:17 PM: I continued the SEO course. Work Duration: 1 hour 25 minutes 04:23 PM - 04:47 PM: I continued the SEO course. I was a little sleepy and tired so quite unfocused too. Work Duration: 24 minutes Deep Work Sessions: 09:59 AM - 10:45 AM: I handled the received items for the order items. Deep Work Duration 46 minutes 11:04 AM - 12:37 AM: I fixed the checkout page and added the legal information pages. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 33 minutes I was a little down today. I think it's probably because of the last two intense days. My body and brain need some time to adapt to more intense rhythms. Total Work Duration: 4 hours 47 minutes, including 2 hours 19 minutes of Deep Work (objective at least 6 hours) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective 0 minutes, I'm not reading anything currently)

Have high standards, your minimum standards should be high so that when you focus on an objective the minimum result that you get is already a high-quality result.

Norman Vincent Peale

24 July 2020 Wake Up Time: 05:40 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 09:15 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ✅ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: 11:42 AM - 11:56 AM: I had a conversation with my client. Work Duration: 14 minutes Deep Work Sessions: 09:02 AM - 10:11 AM: I corrected the API calls for the filters on the search page. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 9 minutes 10:34 AM - 11:42 AM: I started to handle new query parameters to set the filters on the product grid page. My client called me near the end. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 8 minutes 12:07 AM - 12:50 AM: I completed the corrections for the filters on the product grid page. I will have to do the same for the search page. Deep Work Duration: 43 minutes 01:46 PM - 03:01 PM: I corrected the search page filters and updated the view for the order's history. I distracted myself briefly at a moment. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 15 minutes 03:10 PM - 04:52 PM: I created the view order items modal. I still have a little of work to do in this area. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 42 minutes @Raphael Superb work! The do nothing habit before going to bed works very well on your sleep. Continue the good work! Total Work Duration: 6 hours 11 minutes, including 5 hours 57 minutes of Deep Work (objective at least 6 hours) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective 0 minutes, I'm not reading anything currently)

23 July 2020 Wake Up Time: 05:40 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 09:05 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ✅ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: 08:02 AM - 08:18 AM: I had a quick call with my client. Work Duration: 16 minutes 12:00 AM - 12:23 AM: I did a small correction than a quick summary of what needs to be done. Work Duration: 23 minutes 01:33 PM - 02:37 PM: I had a talk with my client, he is still adding more work and talking about future projects, but doesn't want to pay enough. These negotiations are tight, I hope to get better payments for the following months. Work Duration: 1 hour 4 minutes 04:13 PM - 04:30 PM: I did a few analysis and started a few improvements on the search page. Work Duration: 17 minutes Deep Work Sessions: 07:24 AM - 08:02 AM: I continued to clean the project and fixed the remaining bugs. 38 minutes 08:28 AM - 10:03 AM: More bug fixes. I distracted myself at a moment. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 35 minutes 10:35 AM - 11:50 AM: More bug fixes. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 15 minutes 03:02 PM - 04:08 PM: I fixed the filters for the product grid page. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 6 minutes 04:48 PM - 05:36 PM: I started to work on the filters for the product page. Deep Work Duration: 48 minutes @Raphael Superb job You worked a lot today and in a focused manner. Congratulations! Continue! Total Work Duration: 7 hours 22 minutes, including 5 hours 22 minutes of Deep Work (objective at least 6 hours) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective 0 minutes, I'm not reading anything currently)

22 July 2020 Wake Up Time: 05:35 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 09:20 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ✅ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: 08:33 AM - 08:56 AM: I had a call with my client. Work Duration: 23 minutes 10:12 AM - 10:23 AM: I had another call with my client. Work Duration: 11 minutes Deep Work Sessions: 09:21 AM - 10:12 AM: I fixed more bugs on the project. Deep Work Duration: 51 minutes 10:56 AM - 12:20 AM: More bug fixes. I was less distracted in the second half because my sister called me to talk. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 24 minutes @Raphael Good, you woke up early and rest properly today Total Work Duration: 2 hours 49 minutes, including 2 hours 15 minutes of Deep Work (objective 0 minutes) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective 0 minutes, I'm not reading anything currently)

This guy is incredible

21 July 2020 Wake Up Time: 07:30 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 09:00 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ✅ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: 01:42 PM - 03:05 PM: I withdraw the money from the freelancing platform. I also searched for a better laptop and made an order. Work Duration: 1 hour 23 minutes Deep Work Sessions: 09:05 AM - 10:00 AM: I started to fix the remaining bugs on the project, I fixed the cart number bug and I will fix the order data bug after. Deep Work Duration: 55 minutes 10:20 AM - 11:35 AM: I created a service for managing cookies and find out why I was having so many issues with them. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 15 minutes 11:42 AM - 12:20 AM: I wanted to continue fixing the remaining bugs, but I had many API errors. I contacted my client but didn't get any response. Deep Work Duration: 38 minutes 03:48 PM - 04:02 PM: I fixed a few bugs. The server is still not up, I cannot do a lot of things. Deep Work Duration: 14 minutes 07:42 PM - 07:55 PM: I correction another small bug. The server is still down, unfortunately. Deep Work Duration: 13 minutes @Raphael Remember, when things are hard just pause and let go. When you feel resistance, just let go. When you feel the urge to distract yourself, just let go. When your body is tight, just let go. When things aren't going well, just relax your body and let go. Accept the now, let go & love yourself ♥️ Total Work Duration: 4 hours 38 minutes, including 3 hours 3 minutes of Deep Work (objective at least 6 hours) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective 0 minutes, I'm not reading anything currently)

I need to take more empty time, I have been way too distracted recently.

20 July 2020 Wake Up Time: 05:37 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 10:22 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ❌ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: 02:20 PM - 02:22 PM: I just did a commit. Work Duration: 2 minutes 03:41 PM - 04:55 PM: I started to read about the Twitter API, then my client distracted me and we had a pretty long conversation. Work Duration: 1 hour 14 minutes Deep Work Sessions: 08:35 AM - 10:02 AM: I corrected a bug, then started to work on Instagram login. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 27 minutes 10:42 AM - 12:12 AM: I completed the Instagram login modal. I need to do the same thing for the registration. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 30 minutes 01:18 PM - 02:04 PM: I implemented the Instagram registration and did some corrections. Deep Work Duration: 48 minutes 07:48 PM - 09:16 PM: I made API calls to verify the token validity and created the session expired modal. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 28 minutes I distracted myself too much on the internet today. I thought I'll work in a focused manner, but I failed. @Raphael Good, you woke up early and worked enough today Just remember, stay focused, this is critically important. Total Work Duration: 6 hours 29 minutes, including 5 hours 13 minutes of Deep Work (objective at least 6 hours) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective 0 minutes, I'm not reading anything currently)

19 July 2020 Wake Up Time: 06:00 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 09:15 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ✅ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Deep Work Sessions: 09:35 AM - 10:22 AM: I started to work on Google social login, so far so good. Deep Work Duration: 47 minutes 10:50 AM - 12:42 AM: I finished Google login implementation, I took more time than I expected. I had negative and sad thoughts of past events that came back and also other thoughts related to self-actualization. Deep Work Duration: 1 hour 52 minutes I didn't expect to work, but this client is demanding so I worked a little anyway. I need to learn to set boundaries and ask for more if there's more work. @Raphael That's good, you woke up early and worked a little today. You maybe didn't relax properly as you didn't take a lot of empty time, but that's fine, you will do better next time. Take care ♥️ Total Work Duration: 2 hours 39 minutes, including 2 hours 39 minutes of Deep Work (objective 0 minutes) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (objective 0 minutes, I'm not reading anything currently)

@commie @zeroISinfinity @modmyth @Galyna It might be better to open a new thread to discuss all these issues, we are derailing he's journal here. The discussion is not only about him anymore, and I feel that it will expand in many directions.

I don't know if this is only me, but I feel like it mostly works when someone has repressed anger. That way when someone is harsh, the person reacts and wants to prove others wrong. I don't consider this healthy as it's backed up by fear.

I agree, and it's actually after being broked in pieces myself that I started loving myself. I was just so down that I started to have panic attacks, I thought I was dying. It led me to the realization that I need to accept and love myself, and that's what is currently allowing me to move forward even though I still have backslashes. Nevertheless, I consider that there's a limit to how much someone needs to be broken down, some people never recover. I don't know him that much nor the relationship that you guys are, so I'm maybe wrong here, and maybe broking him down is necessary, but I personally don't want to break him until he has a panic attack or a heart attack. There's an equilibrium to be found and some limits to be respected to allow growth to happen.