Raphael

When we aren't connected to survival everything becomes identical.

10/02/2021 (Week 3) If I treat listening as a creative act... I'll bring more consciousness to moments where I need to listen I'll choose moments where I consider worth to listen I'll develop more empathy I'll get more ideas from listening to people I'll open myself more to people I'll be happier to listen I'll be able to create flow states while listening If I notice how people are affected by the quality of my listening... I'll see that people are needy I'll see that people want visibility I'll see that I can bring happiness by caring a little more about people I'll see that I can improve my relationships by listening to people I'll see that not listening to most people is causing me to be disconnected and alienated I'll see that I'm a selfish bastard who only cares about himself I'll see that to improve my relationships I need to let go of my selfishness and become a little more selfless by listening to people's needs and opinions If I bring more awareness to my dealings with people today... I'll be more kind I'll be more attentive to my neurotic emotional reactions when listening to people I'll bring more compassion to my relationships I'll be more attentive to the words that come from my mouth I'll start to change the world by changing how I behave in my relationships I'll be fairer I'll let know in a polite way when someone's conversation doesn't interest me If I commit to dealing with people fairly and benevolently... I'll take time to analyze how I treat people I'll create the proper balance between me and others I'll understand that people are where they are and that it's unfair to see them as inferior because of that I'll be more genuine I'll bring more responsibility to how I behave with people I'll be open to different opinions

10 February 2021 Wake Up Time: 05:37 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 09:50 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ❌ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: 10:40 AM - 11:19 AM I did some research and responded to a client Focus: 3.5/5 Duration: 39 minutes 07:38 PM - 07:51 PM I responded to a client Focus: 3.5/5 Duration: 13 minutes Good day, even though I got some internet cravings before going to bed. Average Focus: 3.5 / 5 (objective at least 3.5 / 5) Total Work Duration: 52 minutes, including 0 minutes of Deep Work (objective 0 minutes) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (I'm not reading anything currently)

Towards Wealth I'm not rich, but I'm moving a little more towards wealth every day by using my mind and my emotions. It will happen naturally, that's something that I felt since I was a kid. For the moment I have pretty good living standards despite not being rich.

Interesting.

It's a movie scene, life ain't like a movie. If you have some real life examples I'm interested btw.

I had many experiences like you, not just with women, but globally in relationships. I would just ask a question because I was curious about something, or make a statement and people would easily get highly emotionally reactive. I think that's because I'm naturally highly logical and don't take things personally, where most people are more emotional. Your post was still a little too much in my opinion. However, if I made something similar, but a little more down to earth, I would also not understand why Leo would lock it as being "low quality". In my mind, it would only be that I was curious about knowing people's opinions on a subject and therefore asked a question.

09/02/2021 (Week 3) If I treat listening as a creative act... I'll get more creative ideas I'll recognize that other people can have good ideas too I'll put more attention in listening to people I'll got ideas from sounds around me I'll be happy to listen I'll complain a little less about noises around me If I notice how people are affected by the quality of my listening... I'll realize how much listening to people is important in relationships I'll make an effort to listen with more attention I'll see that people want to be heard just like me I'll notice that people are happy to speak about everything it means that I can improve my relationships by listening more to people I could help people by giving them feedback after listening to them I could help people by giving them emotional support after listening to them If I bring more awareness to my dealings with people today... I'll accept that people aren't concerned by the things that I'm concerned I'll see that people suffer from unconsciousness I'll see that people cannot help themselves many times I'll see that I can help people every day by giving some love I'll see that I can help people every day by giving a few tips I'll open myself a little more to people I'll bring more happiness to my social interactions I'll be more enthusiastic around people If I commit to dealing with people fairly and benevolently... I'll set a proper balance between personal interest and other people interest I'll be more genuine I'll see that everyone needs to be treated fairly and respectfully I'll try to find win-win solutions for everyone I'll stop looking down at people I'll stop seeing myself as a superior being

09 February 2021 Wake Up Time: 06:40 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: ~ PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ✅ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: 09:31 AM - 10:40 AM After one year of fighting and more than one hour this morning it looks like I'm finally able to withdraw my money from the freelancing platform. I now only need to wait with the hope to see the money appears on my banking interface Focus: 3.5/5 Duration: 1 hour 9 minutes 10:58 AM - 12:33 AM I did some analysis and some research on backlinks. I learned a lot Focus: 3.5/5 Duration: 1 hour 35 minutes 01:25 PM - 02:57 PM I took back the accounting course, but I realize that it's currently useless for me. I switched back to my coding project and got in touch with my previous work Focus: 3.5/5 Duration: 1 hour 32 minutes 07:33 PM - 08:10 PM I updated node.js, made a small correction and a pull request, and sent some updates to a client Focus: 3.5/5 Duration: 37 minutes Deep Work Sessions: 03:02 PM - 03:36 PM I fixed a bug, found another issue, but it only looks like a software that needs to be updated Focus: 3.5/5 Duration: 1 hour 34 minutes I didn't want to get out of bed this morning because it felt so good. It didn't matter that much in the end as I had a pretty productive day. Average Focus: 3.5 / 5 (objective at least 3.5 / 5) Total Work Duration: 6 hours 27 minutes, including 1 hour 34 minutes of Deep Work (objective at least 6 hours) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (I'm not reading anything currently)

08/02/2021 (Week 3) If I treat listening as a creative act... I'll bring more focus when I'll have conversations I'll remember better what people says to me I'll be more open to different opinions I'll be non judgmental with listening to people I'll be more happy to hear people share I'll be more open to people If I notice how people are affected by the quality of my listening... I'll realize that how I listen to them is part of the quality of my relationships I'll notice that people like attention and visibility I'll improve the quality of my listening I'll change how I listen to people I'll have a little more attention to people I'll have a little more attention to people's needs If I bring more awareness to my dealings with people today... I'll be more happy to communicate with people I'll be more genuine with people I'll see people as innocent childs I'll create a proper balance between interacting and caring about people and my personal life I'll bring more consciousness to my interactions I'm bring more attention to my interactions If I commit to dealing with people fairly and benevolently... I'll be more honest with people I'll accept people's imperfections I'll be more genuine with people I'll try to better understand people I'll try to better understand human emotions I'll enjoy human relationships more and more I'll be more authentic I'll bring more joy to my life

08 February 2021 Wake Up Time: 05:45 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 09:35 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ❌ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: 08:27 AM - 10:01 AM I continued the accounting course Focus: 3.5/5 Duration: 1 hour 34 minutes 10:26 AM - 12:06 AM I continued the accounting course, I distracted myself a bit at some moments Focus: 3.5/5 Duration: 1 hour 40 minutes 01:06 PM - 02:30 PM I continued the work on the accounting course Focus: 3.5/5 Duration: 1 hour 24 minutes 02:39 PM - 03:48 PM I'm continuing the accounting course, but starting to get tired Focus: 3.5/5 Duration: 1 hour 9 minutes 03:54 PM - 04:21 PM I corrected an issue on the calculations Focus: 3.5/5 Duration: 27 minutes @Raphael Good job! Average Focus: 3.5 / 5 (objective at least 3.5 / 5) Total Work Duration: 6 hours 14 minutes, including 0 minutes of Deep Work (objective at least 6 hours) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (I'm not reading anything currently)

Releasing Trauma Is Hard So... I want to release some traumas that I experienced in the past and this is very hard. I started to list people who hurt me in the past on a document and started to put myself back in these situations. I will mostly focus on recent situations and work-related situations at first. What I experienced so far is that only writing the situations is pretty tough. I don't want to do this, I feel resistance, I feel pain, I feel anger, I feel sadness, I want to cry while I'm only writing the situations. I want to watch porn as a way to cope with these situations. But, all of these reactions are good signs, it means that I have a lot of work to do there in order to heal myself. And I haven't even started the exercise, I'm just writing out situations.

I have a title for your book: Understanding Life, Consciousness, Sex, Relationships, Politics, Societies, and Everything Else

Welcome back! I'm happy to see you here again

07/02/2021 (Week 2) If any of what I wrote this week is true, it might be helpful if I... try to fix my insecurities start to fix my traumas by using the trauma release exercise work with the emotional scale model show more respect to people accept to have more fun accept myself practice radical honesty in my life force myself a bit every day in order to achieve my goals

Weekly Statistics (01 February 2021 - 07 January 2021) Total Working Hours 24 hours 50 minutes Average Focus 3.41 / 5

07 February 2021 Wake Up Time: 05:50 AM (objective 5:30 AM - 6:00 AM) In Bed Time: 09:20 PM (objective 9:00 PM - 9:30 PM) ✅ 45 minutes of Doing Nothing Before Going To Sleep Work Sessions: No work for today Average Focus: ~ / 5 (objective at least 3.5 / 5) Total Work Duration: 0 minutes, including 0 minutes of Deep Work (objective 0 minutes) Total Reading Time: 0 minutes (I'm not reading anything currently)

A new thread would be more appropriate because this is complicated stuff...

So stage orange: turning a global crisis into an opportunity to make money.

Healing Work Traumas I got this idea from Leo's latest blog post: https://www.actualized.org/insights/back-from-2-month-break-updates I currently have a problem when working which is that very often when I work I have painful thoughts that appear about past work experiences. I entered the marketplace in late 2017 and worked in two companies previously. What happened is that I had a lot of creative ideas and wanted to do good work and did my best to achieve goals, but got dragged down by coworkers and supervisors. They basically got jealous and started to see me as a treat, and therefore I got bullied a lot. Of course, I also did some shit at some moments, but I think it was way less than what I experienced. At a point, the bullying was too much for me so I cut off everyone as much as I could. I was basically going to work, not talking to anyone all day long, and then getting back to my small apartment. I was all alone, depressed, sometimes suicidal, and sometimes had panic attacks. Even if I'm far away from this now I still have many residues within myself that are impacting my ability to work and to use my brain properly. I currently associate work with pain where before that work used to be a way to express myself. Leo talked about how important it is to have a proper root and also mentioned that sometimes it's worthwhile taking time to fix the root rather than trying to force things. This is what I'm going to do. I was planning to start reading a new book recently, but it will wait. I will instead use this time to fix my work-related traumas .

So sharp as usual I'm happy to see the direction that actualized.org is taking by the way, especially with the book. I recently had a life purpose idea about understanding life deeply and interconnecting everything and then applying the knowledge to strategic areas on the planet in order to raise the level of consciousness and create chain effects. Even if you don't release the book, only the notes would be gold, but I think you will achieve it.

@Leo Gura Question: You mentioned that you were interested in connecting everything, and especially human development with consciousness. You also mentioned that you are getting to insane levels of consciousness when using psychedelics to the point that you feel so much joy where it goes full circle and becomes painful. Do you think it can be similar for global human development? What if societies become so advanced that everybody feels so much joy to the point where it becomes painful and boring and we seek back drama? Could societies collapse that way? Or could we globally as a species get stuck in a strange loop of Pain -> Joy -> Pain? Or could we find the proper balance at a point between high joy with still the possibility of experiencing drama in a controlled way so that living life ain't too boring?

I hate noises again. Sometimes I would like to be deaf.

06/02/2021 (Week 2) If any of what I wrote this week is true, it might be helpful if I... bring more consciousness to the words that I use bring more consciousness to the emotions that I share carefully choose the words that I share carefully choose the emotions that I share bring radical honesty to my life accept not being perfect notice my emotional patterns accept having needs and wants work to fulfill authentic needs and wants let go of inauthentic needs take 100% responsibility for my emotions take 100% responsibility for my awareness take 100% responsibility for the quality of my life