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About Matteo

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  1. @Consilience I heard about that book several times. There is even a sub Reddit dedicated to it. How long did it take for you to see results? Months ago I was doing a concentration practice suggested by Om Swami, staring at a candle for minimum 7 minutes, two times a day for 40 days. Are you referring to something similar when you talk about stabilizing the attention span? When I did this practice, I haven't noticed significant changes.
  2. I tested many meditation techniques, some of them in more depth than others. (I did two vipassana retreats and lived in sadhguru's ashram for three months, practicing several hours of yoga every day) Many teachers advertise one technique or more, and they have their own explanation on why it's supposed to work. They also have criticisms towards other teachers and techniques, which confuses me even more. I like to test things for myself and see if they work, so that I don't have to take somebody else's opinion about what to practice, what works, what is safe, what delivers results in a reasonable span of time, but in my experience I can't really tell if anything that I've done had some effect on me or not. Right now I'm very confused and overwhelmed by the quantity of instructions and techniques out there and the fact that they seem to require so much time to start delivering results. In this confusion I find almost impossible to pick one technique and stick with it. I haven't practiced regularly in months. Do you resonate with this? I don't want to just give up the whole thing, but I feel that this is what is going to happen if I don't resolve some of my confusion. You may share some techniques that really did something for you and describe your experience with them a little bit. What I'm primarily looking for is more happiness, long lasting peace and satisfaction. Also, I heard so many times the idea that I am God, I am the absolute, that reality is an infinite hallucination, that all is one, that I would love to see if this is true for myself. And possibly maintain that awareness.
  3. @Leo Gura I think what you're saying makes sense. I would like to interview one of those extrasensory people to know how they developed their opinion on the subject. Have you done such a thing? Have you had any occasion of meeting with an extrasensory person and have him check your body's condition? Are you interested in having this kind of feedback?
  4. @Leo Gura I understand that someone who has no experience or not enough experience with something isn't in the position to be knoledgeable on that thing. What makes me confused is that although some of those teachers who criticize psychedelics don't have much experience with them themselves, some of them claim to be extrasensory and to see things that a normal person wouldn't normally see. Let's say some of them are genuine: If I were extrasensory and I were able to see a correlation in people's body between energy damage and psychedelic usage, I'm not sure I would start taking them myself just to see if I get damaged also. So, even though those people have no experience themselves, aren't their capacities giving some validity to their perspective?
  5. The discussion about whether using psychedelics is appropriate or not is becoming a real problem and source of confusion for me. I have had 10 trips with psychedelics with proper settings, and I had been in Sadhguru's ashram for 3 months and did several of his programs, including kriya yoga, hatha yoga, mantra yoga, and shoonya meditation. Did a vipassana retreat, and right now I'm experimenting with shaktipat transmission. Tried many types of meditation and practices and watched thousands of youtube clips by spiritual teachers, and read many books. After all of this, still I'm not clear at all about psychedelics. Teachers have conflicting views: - Sadhguru says that they damage the energy system, and he says he has clear awareness of the layers of the body and how it works. He also says that people who do take psychedelics, don't really grow through the years. I don't know what kind of growth he's referring to. - Teal Swan seems to have a more balanced view about them. She says they can be a tool, but also they're not for everybody. She claims to be extrasensory and to perceive the human energy body, but she doesn't say anything about possible damages to that due to psychedelics usage. here's the video - Jeffery Martin, which is conducing a large scale experiment about using meditation to transition people into persistent non dual awareness, says that from their data, people who did take psychedelics struggle more in his meditation program to transition into persistent non dual consciousness. - right now I'm taking shaktipat from a guy on the internet which has been trained by Ramaji. When I asked him about psychelelics, he said this: 1. if you did psychedelics you should wait at least one year before reciving shaktipat. 2. Psychedelics create disturbance in the energetic makeup of the body. 3. people who say that psychedelics are a desiderable tool, are not necessarely enlightened, even if they're shamans or if they claim to be. 4. He said "a true teacher wouldn't reccomend psychedelics". - David Hawkins says that when people did take LSD with proper preparation, they only needed to take it once or twice. Here is the video - Osho talks in particular about LSD, saying that the body must undergo a long specific preparation to be chemically purified, before taking the substance. I heard other teachers saying other things, but I can't remember all the sources right now. From my perspective, what the main debate seems to be is that people who claim to have awareness of the energy body say that psychedelics can be damaging to that, and I woulnd't underestimate that statement if one's goal is not just to visit deep mystical states from time to time, but to stabilyze into a higher state permanently. On the other hand, other people seems to be very happy with what psychedelics did for them, but I don't know if these people are aware at all of sublter dimentions of their own body, and so maybe they miss where the damage is happening because they do not perceive that dimension. If there is no such thing as an energetic danger to psychedelics, why so many teachers claim that it exists? Are they just plainly lying? Seems unlikely that they're just dishonest and that they're inventing what they're saying. I don't have any awareness at all of the energy body, prana, astral body, aura, energetic makeup or anything like that, so I have no way of verifying what they're saying.
  6. I heard Jeffery Martin saying that during his research, it came up that people who have done psychedelics struggle more when they try to transition to non-symbolic consciousness through meditation. Also I heard Sadhguru saying that big, fast drug induced expansions of consciousness are dangerous to the energy body. I have some experience with 1P-LSD and cannabis, and I never felt any energetic damage because I don't even know how such a thing looks like. It may have slowed down my awakening process, but how can we know if that is the case? I have no way of comparing how I'm progressing with how I could have been progressing if I didn't take any psychedelics. If someone has any precise informations about this subject it would be extremely valuable for me and for others with this kind of doubts. I stopped doing psychedelics because I was afraid of damaging myself, and I would start doing them again immediately if I knew what they don't slow you down.
  7. @ajasatya I've been meditating for three years now, but I was consistent only for short periods of time. Right now, I'm doing a very basic practice that I learned from Sadhgruru's ashram (I've been there for three months this summer). I'm doing an 18 minutes meditation that they teach, two times a day, and then I do one cycle of Surya Namaskar in the morning. I discovered that unless I do very short practices, I get a lot of anxiety and I end up dropping them and find myself at the starting point again and again. In the ashram they told me that I may benefit from doing a lot of physical activity, because it will settle my energy system and allow me to practice more effectively. I would like one day to start doing regular meditations up to one hour a day, something like breath awareness, but right now I want to be totally consistent with what I'm already doing.
  8. @purerogue do you have any suggestions about how to fix it?
  9. Yesterday I went to a friend of mine to do rehearsals with our band, we are 4 members. I was feeling great and we were joking about various things while having breakfast. The main topic was picking up girls. Then, for some reasons, one of the members (a girl) started criticize me in a playful way, saying that the way I present myself would turn off girls. I wasn't concerned at all about that, because I knew that she was joking, and I was replying in a playful way also. But then she was persisting, and out of the blue I got hit by a huge feeling of shame and sadness. I felt that way the whole day, and it was awful. I was trying to understand what happened, and what I came up with is that deep down I feel like I am a worthless, arrogant human being, which deserves to suffer. I had that belief my whole life, but I thought it wasn't there anymore. I don't know how to go about this. I cannot afford therapy at the moment because as a music producer I don't earn enough because I've just got started. I'm afraid to get a regular job, because I don't think I'm capable of functioning normally in a work environment like a restaurant or a supermarket, there are too many people and I don't know how to deal with them when they behave negatively, without being overwhelmed by huge negative emotions. What can I try?
  10. Are you asking if I'm blind? I have normal vision. Was that what you meant?
  11. @Haumea2018 I'm sorry, what is JBP?
  12. @Nahm So, basically what you're suggesting is to substitute thinking with breath awareness until my mind stops?
  13. But is that really true? I agree with you when you say that the search puts a strain on you, I can feel that strain very clearly. But what about realizing that everything is one, that consciousness is universal, that the universe is a mind, and all that stuff? Does the dropping of the search make you realize that? I don't really get the second part of what you said.
  14. @Leo Gura I would like to have your perspective on this, if possible. Thank you.
  15. I do remember you. We never spoke, but I saw you hanging around several times.