universe

Why does it bother you? Its ok if you are not good with people, its like a muscle. You can train it. (E.g. by watching charisma on command videos on youtube). There is nothing wrong with you and you dont have to be good with people. Look up the sedona method. What Im guessing is that you have a need for validation and a need for control which ultimately block you from behaving how you would like to. With the sedona method you have a tool to release these needs. Do that and in any situation where youd want to be social you will be able to easily accept that there is no guaranteed control or validation. By accepting this part of reality you will become fearless.

You can release emotions and pain via the sedona method. Welcome it and feel it all the way.

This is the way.

I dont quite understand. You mean when giving a speech about your project that has some yellow or turquoise stuff in it, people tend to ignore it? I guess because they cant really relate to it?

Could be a lot of things and from a distance its hard to see whats really going on here. General advice: Read "How to win friends and influence people" and watch Leos video on how to be funny.

Thoughts and prayers Rip - this is what death really is

Seems to me like you are overthinking this. You dont need complex models to be conscious. From your text it seems like you are a very logical and rational guy. My advice to you would be to explore your emotions and energetic levels very thoroughly. Not only will it help with dating but it will help with actualizing, too. In a holistic kind of way. Watch for example these videos as a start: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VQCWryMBRxQ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0j7dwG1cXc4

Sounds fucking annoying to me. Maybe it has to do with your location or age. Do you text with them before you meet, like on the same day? What I always try to do is set the location fordates 3 minutes away from my home. Doesnt mean I never took a 30 minute drive somewhere else but Im just lazy.

What if you let go of your desire to be disciplined and be happy just relaxing and having fun all day?

To add on what Knock said. Yes, dont chase women. Dont be afraid to look into yourself and face the feelings you want to avoid: Imagine not being loved by anyone, talking for days with many people and no one who will give you validation. Feel into it. Feel it in your body. Accept that feeling fully. Imagine being in a situation where you cant make a girl stop laughing about you, pointing fingers at you. Where you just cant come up with any words that can change how she behaves. Feel how it is to loose control. Feel into it. Feel it in your body. Accept that feeling fully. Imagine being in a room with people where you talk about your intimate feelings and open yourself up. Imagine those people attacking you and talking down on you for what you said. Imagine how it is to be totally vulnerable. Feel into it. Feel it in your body. Accept that feeling fully. Can you accept these situations? Make it a challange, how bad can you make the situation in your head and still be ok with it? Watch Leos video on Fear. Its very helpful. Fear = Not accepting a part of reality. When you conquer your fears you will radiate acceptance and confidence. And also you shed your layers of protection that hide the real you that people can connect with (like Knock said). This is really 90% of the way. The rest is learning some basic communication skills. Then when you go out, you will be confident that women will like you. Maybe not this one, maybe not the next one. It doesnt matter. You just do whatever you like, play around, have fun. That is how you have the abundance mindset. The next step is to get actual abundance. When you get new numbers every day and you really give no flying fuck about if one girl stops being interested. At best you find it a little funny. Now you reached the level women are at naturally. They have so many guys interested in them, they dont give a damn about if one guy stops being interested And you start to choose, and pick the girl you like the most and you go home with her. And the next day you do the same with another one. I mean you dont need to, but just knowing that you can. That gives you actual abundance. You get into a flow. You wont be able to get any girl, you will fail. Maybe when you go out one night you wont even get a single one. But the difference between someone with abundance and someone who is needy is: You dont start doubting yourself if things go south. Because you are sure of yourself. You know that you are enough. Its the 10/10 mindset. Imagine a girl that is a 10/10. That is the world they live in.

To add to what good advise you already got here. First, having 3 children who you are not in contact with and an abusive ex-partner are red flags. Also she seems like she was kind of stalking you? If yes, that would be a huge red flag. When you are dating be careful about dates who talk a lot about their problems. First of all it means they have a lot of problems, do you really want a relationship with someone who is in a pile of mess? That requires a lot of strength. Im a big advocate for taking time for yourself to work on your problems before commiting to a new relationship. Then also the saying "dont eat where you shit" applies here. Girls are usually not going to be intimate with someone they told all their problems. If you are already in a relationship for a longer time you can become more intimate by sharing your deepest fears and problems. The early stages of a relationship (especially before you had sex) are more playful, fun and romantic.

Looked for a simple design but nice To-Do list. Couldnt find any. They all looked ugly as hell. So I took a wedding checklist template from the office site and tweaked it a bit to my liking. Here is the file: Simple Design ToDo.docx I used these fonts: Batang, Edwardian Script ITC and Monotype Corsiva Here is a sample pdf so you can see how it should look like: Sample ToDo.pdf Details Its a bit artistic and maybe too much for some people. Wanted the task font to be playful but still readable, could be improved Didnt want to have any checkboxes because they break the design and you can just strikethrough This list is for about 8 tasks, if you want to fit more into one page you should make the task size smaller But its more for less tasks. No "sub-tasks" included as it would clutter the design. Maybe have another paper for them if needed You can make more than one page of course If you have any ideas please post here. Im not sure about the orange, maybe other colors are better for coming in "task crushing" mood Please refrain from discussion about the actual efficiency of using To-Do lists. Im aware that apps exist for this as well.

You wont succumb to these temptations if you are truly decided. My friends could put the cocaine in front of me, on the belly of a hooker and cheering me to take it, I wouldnt take it. If I was you I would really look into your standpoint towards those things. Do you think they benefit you or not. You struggle not because you fail to be disciplined. You fail because your perceived benefit of being abstinent to youtube/porn is not that much greater or even greater at all to just enjoy them. Its a fine line and you will need to find your own balance. Another question for you: Do you have a meaningful job/hobby you like to spend time on. Do you have regular sex? Because it could be the case that you dont have any addictions. Maybe you are just bored.

Dont fool yourself. You do this stuff because you want to. Its not like you dont want to watch youtube but something evil is making you do it against your will! So the problem is, at some point you might rationally explain that its not what you want, but most of the time you just want it. If you really decided you dont want it. Make a challange, for one month no youtube for example. And then find more meaningful or better ways to spend your time. See how you feel about it. You have to deal with yourself here. Literally. Show yourself your life without the addiction and let it compare to your life with it. If you truly feel better without it you will stop doing it and it will be easy. The thing is right now, you dont truly believe you would be better off without youtube. In short, its a decision.

Besides being included in your DNA its also culturally constructed. While growing up we see other people of our own gender react to the opposite gender and we imitate that behaviour. Then along comes Movies/Books/Television/Commercials etc., here specific attributes are displayed as being valuable. We take notes. We want to have it.

Could you not rent in Barcelona to host your brother, too? Follow your heart. Ive never been to Madrid but I love Barcelona

By being vulnerable with girls you already show that you are confident and comfortable with them. And you can feel confident right now. Just accept every outcome and be ok with that. Kinda like what you are doing right now.

@MsNobody If you wouldnt objectify people you wouldnt have any concerns about someone spreading love and compassion to 10 others a day. No one is the property of someone else. Dating as its is right now for the majority of people is very sefish. On both a conscious and unconscious level. Can we just agree that this makes it a struggle to people of all genders?

As a member of the fucked up sleep schedule club, what kind of detrimental health effects do you notice?

You are not really doing yourself or even your friends a favor by conceiling your emotions. Real friends are interested in how you feel and what you do, they dont leave you because you are down. As long as people dont make it all about themselves in some kind of self-absorbed narcissistic way, I can not think about a time where I would be annoyed or repulsed by someone telling me they are feeling down and miserable.

@Forrest Adkins What do you mean with boring stuff? Have you ever noticed that the "cool" kids in school talk about boring stuff all the time. Communication has more layers than the words you say.

"Hello I have almost no experience with girls, is it a good idea to get some experience?" What do you think Go for a walk, girls like that. Do whatever you want to do! If you dont enjoy the date she will notice. Girls want you to have fun on a date and they want you to lead, lead them where to go, lead the conversation and lead the physical touch. In general, some girls might want to lead but they are rare.

Ive had success with these dating apps but nothing serious has ever gotten out of it. It can work quite good when you travel. It might help you when you are shy to get some dating experience. Just set up a profile and start swiping and see for yourself. You can do both on- and offline dating. In the end all these apps do is connect two people. So it all depends on the person you are talking with.

On one hand you are right, everyone and everything is exactly how it should be and perfectly in tune with everything there is. On the other hand when you look for it, you see distracted people who are unhappy everywhere. You see potential. You see what could be. But yeah I dont like to compare myself with others. Everyone is on their own path. Could also be that you lack some very basic needs. Maybe its time to first get your social and financial life in order, not because you need to but because it might give you a speed boost on your spiritual journey.