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Everything posted by universe

  1. @integral @Yarco Thank you for sharing! This feels like discovering the Internet for the first time back when I was a kid. Endless possibilities and pure madness haha love it!
  2. It's up to you. Having most of your values matched will make things easier of course.
  3. Jesus, let them have those girls and find yourself one who cares for others enough to not let her boyfriend bully them. You have an increased need for safety, which will likely manifest in yourself freezing and being blocked. You do not need to life with this, you can change it. Release your need for safety. Done ✅
  4. Growth as always comes from within and has nothing to do with the external. You go out and get rejected hard but you continue to do your thing. When before you went home and resigned -> Growth. You used to think about ways to impress her or what to say and now these thoughts don’t even come to mind. -> Growth You thought that you needed women in your life in order to feel complete and now realize you are perfectly happy and complete on your own. -> Growth
  5. Haha. You are Nahm, you are God. You cannot have it both: The illusion and the Truth, pick wisely. Of course, a donation is to help the receiver, not the donor.
  6. Every gender has it's perks and challanges. This forum is about personal development. While this post was directed at men feeling treated unfairly by society, I see the overall theme of it can be universally applied to every gender that exists or will exist.
  7. Locked. This is not the right place for a privat chat. If you think a moderator has violated the User Guidelines in a PM you can report that PM as well.
  8. Some things that come to mind. -That this worldview leads to hate/anger -How to be relaxed in situations that feel physically tense to you -How people will sense your feelings -Acceptance -Setting boundaries -Expressing your feelings -How to lead -That they are you -Love ❤️
  9. Of course you don't need 5k approaches. Otherwise women all over the world would be starving for guys. It really depends on where you start. A typical student around your age has it much easier than a 40y.o. virgin who spend his entire life playing video games in his parents basement. If you don't enjoy night clubs or it doesn't fit in your schedule fuck it. Stay up early, get your work done and then join some social activities on your campus. Do one approach a day and make sure to spend your time earned by not partying with socializing with other students. Preferably guys who are good with women and women.
  10. Of course they can go everywhere. You can also try to climb a wall with a broken shoulder. But the focus should be on healing. If you are depressed and can't get out of bed then it's hard to have a healthy relationship or build a business. Not saying that you can't or that it is not possible but my first instict would be to focus on healing first and then face the other challanges. But maybe for someone a challange is just what they needed to get out of depression. Everyone is different and to my (albeit limited) understanding of depression it can take on various forms as well.
  11. I don't understand how shaming women and calling them impure is helping anyone. And I am questioning the purity of the person who has these kind of intentions
  12. So you ditch your friends and try to keep the conversation flowing because you fear losing her and because you want to feel harmony again. Does that sound correct?
  13. You unconsciously desired to be the way you are now. So relish it, give yourself a pat on the back for not having any good habits, no girlfriend and no energy. Congratulations you got what you wanted! How does that feel? ❤️
  14. If you bring out shit, people associate you with it. Now if that doesn't matter to you thats allright. But if you want to date her take it easy. Overall sounds like you tried to be rational and wanted her to behave like a man.
  15. self-love ≠ Self-Love This guy talks about people with depression. Actualized.org is specifically not a place to heal your depression. It's stated in the User Guidelines. And I agree with him. If you are depressed it can be because you are too much concerned with your own life and don't care enough about others. Which again Self-Love fixes but there are other ways to do it.
  16. Fuck what other say you should or shouldn't do. I'm confused as to why you stayed with her instead of going to see friends. If you really go deep into why you did. Was it because others said its immature, was it because she wanted it, was it because you wanted to feel harmony, that you didn't like the tension or was it the fear of loosing her. Was it because you felt you did something wrong, was it because you felt like she misunderstood you?
  17. Imagine being a single girl in college and wanting to find a good partner. How do you think she wants be approached by that partner? How does she meet him?
  18. I'd like to share a few unknown quotes which I think are very true. You can never feel other people rejecting you, you can only feel how you reject them and In your 20s you worry about what others will think about you In your 40s you stop caring what others think about you In your 60s you realize that they have never thought about you in the first place What works best for me is to accept and love other people for who they are. Making eye contact in a busy city with strangers can be tense. Many people are not good with tension and they might find it threatening. With that in mind, work on your tension skills, get out of your head and feel into your body. When people notice you are relaxed it allows them to relax as well. Don't forget to smile
  19. The example you give is not gaslighting to my understanding. Gaslighting is when you drive in a car with your friend and then say you think the next turn is left but he says its right. Then later he tells you that you said right and he said left. (Example) Knowing about gaslighting is what keeps you out of victimhood. Because you can be aware when someone is doing it. A good move is then not to accuse them of doing it but to distance yourself from them as soon as possible. There is a ceviat that comes with perception. Just because you perceive an event happening in one way doesn't mean that someone else does so as well. You can not know in what way exactly yout friend saw the event happening. To him it may played out differently. Or he might remembers it differently. So give your friend some leeway but it should be quite clear when it's done on purpose. Of course you are gaslighting yourself because you are Consciousness.
  20. Very doable. Just get out and have fun meeting new people. Do it however way fits best to your personality. Meeting people in Night Clubs or Bars is only one of many ways to do it.
  21. Self-Love Enlightenment experience And also just growing out of your previous attachment styles. Letting go of the need to be with a partner. Or letting go of the need to be separated from your partner. Around 59 minute mark.
  22. Im ready for this because I listened to this all the time when I drove to university years ago
  23. Men and women are very different when it comes to attraction. So your girlfriend most likely was saying the truth. And yes, what you are experiencing is very normal. But these are just desires. You can control them. Just like you can control your desire to hurt someone who you don't like, or steal money that you see somewhere. You make a choice. Having lots of sex with different people can give you pleasure. Building an intimate and long relationship with one partner can give you pleasure. Although ultimate Pleasure comes from realising that you don't need anything And not falling for the voice that tells you that you might miss out on something.