Jordan of the Shire

The flexibility to see multiple paths and differences was the biggest insight I had about reading and going through my own response to this thread. I appreciated that feeling or breath of being able to hold multiple reference points at once and not needing one to be the one size fits all approach. Yea I think the important thing is to alchemize something into the form that is most beneficial for us and our circumstances. Yea that's a tricky part. Always a little slight of hand when it comes to conditioning. Sometimes it happens so fast. Yea wonder is a breath of fresh air. That feeling of touching on something greater ... yea, that's what it feels like sometimes. I feel yah about relishing being triggered - something unknown with you to discover when that happens. Beautiful ❤️ That's interesting, pretty cool! Love that you're able to remember the feeling and activate the state. I can see how wonder can empower the breadth of experience - great feeling to move into and focus on. It's something I'm starting to experience with looking at the sky, the water, the trees. By releasing, the attention is less drawn compulsively to things, and I'm finding new things arising in the awareness. It's fresh!

This is stuff I'm working through too, in my own way. Cool to hear that you have, and/or are in the process of sorting them out. The description of your completed projects, and the way you can connect with who they help, though they are not personally connected, or may never know your role, I admire this, and can relate with that feeling of losing steam when not seeing a higher purpose or mission or outcome. Glad you're able to find that.

I like this @Natasha Tori Maru I find your introspection balanced with everyday life. The things you have to do expand beyond taking care of yourself of a small group of people. You're working with many moving parts that can change and you're not totally in control of everything. Great training for sorting through the internal contractions. @LordFall brother, I know this may seem unconventional, but, to release anything and make space for a new pattern, there is no need to intellectualize, or even feel the emotion. Both, without proper release mechanisms can spin out and become self perpetuating, draining energy, and not gaining the outcome. Natasha has a good process for feeling through emotions, understanding them to release, you have a good process for breaking things down intellectually. I feel I am weak in both those areas, and I am going to be working on them. How I tend to approach things is through the body. Rather than through emotion or logic, I try to open the body physically with different asanas, I then rest the mind in the lower dan tian and release, this pulses energy through to my feet, hands, head, everywhere pretty much, and overtime it purges pathogenic information. As this clears up, the awareness and the thoughts become distinguishable as seperate and then the practice moves to releasing the awareness itself. I don't have to go into stories, emotions, or logically break things down, and I can still release, transcend, and include. I can still use Natasha's prompt for analyzing the experience, but my approach for analyzing the experience will be using the awareness to see space within the emotion, story, thought, etc. The prompts help me unravel what might be subconscious. Then I can use this particular skill set to deal with the underlying binding. Once you apply a label, and start to guess where things come from, then you move further from release. This is the insight of the training - that at the center of it is a tangibly felt somatic contraction which can take place on any of the layers of our being. When you see the contraction and soften awareness towards it, then the mind see's space. This space has a contageous affect on the mind, and what happens is release. The release creates pleasure, and by abiding in this pleasure, you release the negative, and reinforce the positive. This is called a cycle of release.

@integral These are pretty cool. Nice thread. I was vibe coding a few months ago but decided to stop for a bit. I have a couple webapps i'm working on. I need to film content for one of them. The software is so much more advanced than it was when I started so I'm excited to see what I can do now. I had a lot of fun learning about Git, worktrees, mcp's, agents, and I even tried to program an agent to recursively reflect on it's source haha. I like your apps. I want to meditate and contemplate different app ideas and see what comes up. Like you said, marketing is the hardest part to turn a dollar. When you say 6 months, do you mean you would be posting videos on youtube, and running the X algo game type thing?

Generate a level of quality attentiveness through spiritual practice to resolve the underlying issues related to intimacy with people so that you can connect with anyone and still find a level of wholeness within. The problem on the surface is "being properly entertained" by people who you are interacting with, such that you feel "close". But the real underlying issue is a quality of discontentment with what is happening now. Each of those moments is an opportunity to practice your philosophy. The more you can alchemize moments of discontentment into contentment and cease looking for the next thing, the more you can chain a continuum of wellbeing that persists through the changing conditions of the moment.

The human being is composed of all the biological matter but also dimensional energy centers, and magnetic fields. Awakened and cultivated beings imbue their objects, interactions, and crafts with their energy. When this energy is transmitted, then objects can have stored information and radiance which can make people feel calm, sleep better, etc. Aside from the purely physical, there are energetic aspects as well. This is why spaces can have this kind of feeling when built by people with this quality.

Planning a unique and creative challenge and inviting people to join can be fun.

Often in the past the friends who became very close were ones that were confident and skilled in what they do, yet had a layer of insecurity or pain which we allowed eachother to see. We connect on that. This seems to be a common theme in deeper friendships. And can help with loneliness - being seen. Mentorship with someone can help with loneliness, either youre teaching, or being taught. Being of service in the community really helps with loneliness. In spacious awareness, one can feel connected. Building life force energy can reduce the perceived barriers between yourself and others. Wonder if this helps. Forgiving oneself can help if theres a level of shame that prevents one from being seen. I remember a lecture on dante's inferno, which I'll share here, which was super interesting. In this lecture he described Hell as being a place that people experience when they cannot forgive themselves. The way to love is through self forgiveness. An interesting lecture to say the least.

Hey Leo, I don't understand what you mean by Buddhists putting the cart before the horse. I'm curious about it. Can you elaborate?

Buddha means the knowing quality all the time. Buddho means the knowing quality here and there. So with this, we can ascertain that a buddhist is one who is training the ability to know. (and one need not be a buddhist, to practice this) This knowing can be pointed at anything. I would look at it as a skill that can be used creatively. Not always as a way to extinguish thoughts. Thinking skillfully I think is more the point. Also - I personally tend to break away from generalizations like "buddhists, daoists, hindus," etc, because it is a form. When you do the practice, one will overtime do away with rites and rituals. But I suppose one could identify with buddhist daoist etc. What are your thoughts on this?

I edited a lot out I was saying that knowledge can be a hinderance to direct experience. Intellectualizing over the nature of reality is not the same as having a constant direct perception of it. And perception is not the only thing that's important. How you look is just as important as what you see. In practice, not forcing oneself to experience more than they actually can is important. It's releasing with what is within the boarders of your current experience that causes growth, where imagining and conceptualizing ideas like all is mind, without a direct experience of that, it can be a block. I also mentioned that the path of progressing in your life, you may come across many different teachers, and you'll have to use your own discernment to sense what is right for you.

Remove the cultural, ritualistic, and religious aspects, and buddhism is an alchemical framework. In the process of practicing, you'll transform.

Within buddhism, the deeper meaning behind the practical stuff is that the cleanliness of mind makes it easier to absorb. Cleanliness of action builds merit, which empowers penetrative seeing.

"The center is the thing in the middle." "If you start a fight by beating yourself up, you're already outnumbered."

@Natasha Tori Maru I appreciate your breakdown of the logic in this thread, observations of patterns, effort to uplift, be relatable, and debatable. Re: being misunderstood I had a conversation with someone the other day, and the opportunity to test out the relational vs logistical logic you proposed arose. It turned out this relational issue with someone was being interpreted as logistical, and that lead to a conversation of getting on the same page. It was a insight into how relational problems can be misunderstood by the face value logic we ascribe to them. Leading to the sensation of not being understood, which can lead one to acting in emotional ways, or feeling like the connection is null. When someone says, "that's right, that's what I mean" that's when they feel validated and people become more open to viewing things from different perspectives. Easier said than done. Especially when you're trying to get someone else to understand what you mean haha. In some ways it can be easier to try and figure out what others mean than it is to have others understand what you mean. At the same time, the knee jerk reaction and triggering is also very powerful and it goes deeper than what thinking is happening. There can be somatic blocks. Often in the heart which messes up the mind.

It's a silly frame. Guy, woman, who you are is governed by your intention, and action, not some involuntary gender bias, unless the person is unconscious, people with spiritual development are capable of controlling their speech. Watching their mind, and seeing the beginning of a thought, and the proliferating of ideas, until it becomes action. And choosing what to act on. Until that is possible, decency is an approach. If decency is not possible, then you have external feedback from people or events around you that try to nudge you back onto decency. What you're saying reads to me like - I am not responsible for my conduct because I have testosterone. Which is negligence rather than empowerment. And men don't want sex, they want freedom. Lust and the expression of lust is at its core is a spiritual desire for oneness. If one is full, content, at peace, then sex isn't an overpowering drive. It can be managed, channeled, transmuted, expressed in different ways.

When one can control his desire and lust, so that it doesn't rule him, and he can be free of that, or ... if it takes 250 partners, learn to see with non-attachment, then he can progress. On the level of lust and self gratification ... there is something distorted , and it is a block. Don't let psychedelic experiences or spiral dynamics theory knowledge bypass the importance of self-control, discipline, virtue, and wisdom.

It's fun Nice! ... so through this process you're a lot better at what you do and feel like you can relax. Yea it can be a lot to brace against the world. I feel yah ! Feeling this gradual continuity arise? This cycle can be turbulent but its kind of interesting eh? Body / mind / emotions / awareness are not always on the same page but ... it can be enjoyable. Pressure builds / release ... clouds form / it rains ... mind scatters, body contracts / awareness settles, insight dawns release. This cycle, continuous. It's actually kind of queuing me into things like the Yi Jing, looking at how things change, the way things grow, reach their limit, their pressure max, then release, gradually rise, and again. It's very illustrative within nature, and Alchemical practice. Loving the process of seeing it in myself, in terms of the practice, and observing the mind / body / awareness. Then seeing the reflection. ---- I'll be paying more attention to the confidence energy because doubt is one of those things I work on releasing but forget to pay attention to what fills that space. Sometimes the absence of doubt is enough. But confidence is a little more assertive. Amazing Sounds like a sense of authority, and embodied insight, trust in thyself - great stuff

Oh Natasha, I can relate with that - judging someone happens internally so often and so quick it is forsure a huge block. But what a great person to have that happen with. Shes close enough to have compassion for! That the compassion comes easier at least? Revenge eh? Hahaha. Straight up Joker up in here. Watch out for N... haha. In an hour, you'll have a full scale plan, a team from 4 different countries, an arms supplier, a map, timelines, and intel on every move. ----- Yea I hear you, - I'll also experience disappointment, anger, or a sense of betrayal and go through a similar process. What a relief eh? To feel the sadness... the truth of it.. the non-dependent emotional reality which can be released separately from the person. It's a choice in a way. Because you could continue being angry. Crapping on about it to your friends eh? Then when you had the insight it just faded ... sounds about right. Happens to me too. It's almost like nothing happened ... onto next seemingly uncontrollable and unexpected emotional experience ! Since then how have things been? ---- Prickly sensation of adrenaline, energy, and jubilation ... nice I had something like that today while practicing. I was working today so I spent the day just in spacious awareness with my body aligned for a slight fascial stretch. At lunch time I went to visit a friends studio and he shared pictures of his trip to Europe. The feeling got really nice, I began feeling a slight smooth prickle in different areas - either side of my heart, elbows and under the ribs, lower back ... back of neck. It's really nice. The insight for me is like ... confidence that this process works. As the confidence goes up so does the power of focus and the ease of absorption. Mind is like - yea this feels great... gonna keep doing that.

Great post! Thank you I shall ponder this and see how it goes.

Have you had any insights recently? Where are you at now / this week? I've had some insights recently, and it felt like dipping into a hotspring, rejuvenating. Some heart releases and some awareness openings. Sensations of warmth and coolness. With the awareness releases, it's like a wave of light cool wind, and an open expansive sense. When it happens its as if, any constriction around the head is let go of.

Spirituality is the experience of being at peace with yourself to greater and greater degrees. So if you try it simply, it can be good. Simple is safe. The issue with mindfulness is that it awakens mindfulness of all the crap, as well as the good. It can be a progressive cycle because the attention empowers what it is focused on. When the right qualities of mind haven't been trained into attention by an experienced teacher or guide, it can lead one to problems. Because the mind is not the attention. They are different things, and at first, it is not easy to see this. Even when you can it is like blips at first. So having a teacher for this kind of thing is really helpful. (A real teacher, not your community hippy haha, nothing against them but we want safe) In my experience, Damo Mitchell would be a good person to ask this question to, you can find him on instagram. He is very knowledgeable on this. He's trained since he was 4, and has a lifetime of experience, and has taught both chinese medicine, meditation, and more. Another channel that might be good is the youtube channel Meditation Steps. I found them to be cool and wise about what they do Llike Leo said, and this rings true for me too, we need to figure it out for ourselves through knowing thyself - and you're already doing that so good for you. I've found that the way I practice is different than anyone else because I know my character, my weaknesses and strengths. By knowing yours you can use wisdom to choose the right path. Going from yin, extreme yin, to yang, to extreme yang, and then back to yin, is the almost endless path to find balance. It's okay that you stepped into meditation and perhaps had a negative outcome. To find that medium. Sometimes we need to step away for awhile and focus on the normal stuff, like you've said, live a simple life. Healthy body, balanced diet, purpose in life, then when we are more stable, come back, lightly, and do some more work. It is difficult to do spirituality if things are a mess in life, and in mind. Sounds like a contradiction, like spirituality is supposed to help with those things. It does, but at the same time, it is very hampered by a chaotic life. Grounded spirituality is where it's at. Health, wealth, quality relationships, kindness in speech and action, strong body, light mind. It's when we start to think about all the esoteric metaphysics that we can get kind of airy fairy and start to get lost in rabbit holes. It's a fine line

On the topic of sex, I'm not an expert, but same thing applies. Presence, palpable being there, not being totally absorbed in your own pleasure. Then i think there are things like, increasing your ability to last by having discipline in life - managing your stress, eating good food, kegals, exercising, etc, then good quality questions - where do you like it, how much pressure, how fast, etc. Keeping it fun. How do you initiate sex - is it ravishing without foreplay, or have you been building her up for the last day, 2 days, 3 days. I think the orgasm is helped on by being relaxed and open, and building anticipation. Which if we look at the initial question, what creates that relational commitment? The same fundamentals apply to making love!

Give her space to miss you when it's appropriate, respond to bids of love, and don't be a pushover, yet don't be a dick, be a rock, communicate effectively, consciousness is important. What's a common complaint? "You don't hear, feel, see, touch, me" This is not really about listening, touching, seeing with the sense gate, it's about your shen, your ability to penetrate space with you awareness, to have jing (vital energy), to have a palpable presence which is focused on her, and in that, register what it is you see, and to open up that person through curiosity. It shows care. Having a mission, having respectable values, acting in ways that build a track record of trust, and being playful, humorous, easy going. If a woman feels safe, loved, like she can't push you around, like you see her, and that she can trust your mission in the world, and the relationship, and your ability to do it, then you got yourself a companion. I've heard that it takes on average 6-8 weeks of dating before a woman starts bringing up the "well, what are we?" type questions. Then for love to continue growing, it's maintaining polarity, creating anticipation, and caring / feeding your woman with love. But it's not like you start out each day thinking about the next ten years. It's like , enjoy the moment, have fun, work with whats present. The relationship bit is kind of an entity in itself which grows over time.

That sounds pretty nice. It's cool to hear how insights happen in your body and mind. I can see why you're interested in how it happens for other people too.