gengar

@Leo Gura "To be truly fair and equal God must allow the world to be able to be as unfair as it wants. " Would you agree this is the metaphysical principal that allows corruption and evil in the universe? Lately I'm feeling conflicted, as my outlook on life grows worse, my ego sometimes breaks down, and it's clear to me this world is absolutely perfect, including all the evil within it. But then I get heartbroken by the experiences of mothers losing their children for example. God's design is so deep and unsettling at times, when you realize that literally everything is Good. My ego can't handle it. my resentment grows ever bigger even though I'm conscious of the absolute Good of all creation.

I have an acquired disability and my social anxiety is so bad that I often get palpitations when socializing. Not saying you should feel sorry but it feels impossible after trying so many times and failing at the most basic stuff. Would you tell a badger that misses a paw to just go ahead and try? No, and in reality that badger fucks off and dies in a ditch somewhere. This is not me being pessimist, it's just the hard reality. I'm sorry if my posts are too harsh. I just have nobody to talk to and am basically giving up hope at this point. This place is the only place online where I feel like there's not complete retardation going on. I know I shouldn't drag this place down with my negativity, I just had the urge to rant and vent, I'll keep it cool.

Warning: Once you discover that Love is absolute, you might resent your life even more for not getting human love. I awakened to Love (or at least to the fact that it is independent and fundamental) and loved the world and life through it. Yet I'm now a devil for not being Loved back.

From Leo leading me out of the blackpill back in the early 20s to a forum where the blackpill has basically become mainstream concensus is a sick plottwist to say the least. The world is truly ending. Christians, Jews and Muslims are fighting a holy war in the middle east. Nothing has changed. It's entirely over. I just hate I never got to make my parents proud. That and a fucking girlfriend or wife is all a man asks for in this life. Yet the world is ever brutal. It's a tough pill to swallow that this absolute sick level of unfairness is according to God's design, yet also easy to see once you take your Ego out of it. To be truly fair and equal God must allow the world to be able to be as unfair as it wants. I hope his mercy encompasses all things. I don't want to go to a dimension of suffering once this all ends. Oh, and FUCK OWEN COOK.

Dude, you're 6'3, and average in face. That makes you way above average overall. Are you really as delusional to think you belong to the lower levels of looks? But it just goes to show, even if you're at Leo's level (above average), you still need 1000s of approaches, even when the majority of men have given up and are sitting at home. Women's hypergamy knows no end. I hope Iran ends your country once and for all. This world needs to end ASAP.

I thought the selfish love of the Ego was something entirely different than God's selfless self-love?

I must admit that reading this post made me angry, sad and jealous, yet happy that you made it. I just realized other people have actually made growth even though I have been knowing and consuming Leo's content for almost ten years now. And not only consumed it, but it changed my life, Consciousness, worldview. I just became painfully clear to me that I am stuck in karmic loops of darkness and desire. I am stuck here in the rat life and this rat city, and I want to be king of the rats. I want to dominate other rats and be loved by rats. Lack of social experience due to rejection, medical issues, mental health issues, childhood trauma has stopped my growth. This feeling of wanting to be loved and desired by the opposite sex, but it only being a dream visible in porn, movies, social media, other people's lives feels like absolute torture, although i have become quite numb to it. My heart is dead, I think that is fair to say now. A childhood friend of me died 3 months ago and I couldn't even cry. I haven't cried for a long time, not even when my cousin killed herself 3 years ago. The anger, anxiety and loss of hope made me become so deeply cynical about my life and myself that I have almost no hope at all in myself anymore. I loathe myself. The paradoxical thing about this is, and whether this had made my situation worse or better I don't know, is that I actually have had some sort of Awakenings in my life. Especially in the start of 2020, when I broke through to realize my Consciousness is the thing that is Absolute, and that it is God. That all forms of the universe are not external objects, but forms inside my own Consciousness. Till to this day, how broken, hopeless and more corrupt I have become, it is painfully obvious to me that this is true. And not in some Buddhist/non-dualist way. But in a enchanted way, always present in the background. I have a deep appreciation for beauty, whether in nature or created things. I recognize that all human art is God doing his work through humans, and that humanity is an artpiece in itself. Walking through the harbors of my city I know I am walking through God's architecture. There is no way around it. But this love for reality and life makes my disability worse somehow. I would love to just have some experiences with girls, fall in love with eachother, just experience love as an adult for once. I am still a child because I never experienced this. I was never responsible for the others love in a polar relationship between two people. This hurt and lack keeps you as a child forever. You have literally not gone through the qualification of what makes you an adult. Women are the most beautiful creation of God, which is of course my bias as a straight male, but I do recognize that their beauty is the beauty of God and that this is true and not relative or darwinistic. I have a huge lust for life inside of me yet it hurts all the more to not be able to fulfill it. I am stuck in these karmic loops of resentment and trying to succeed, but becoming more bitter and corrupt as time goes on. I have fallen into various death-driven ideologies, mostly involving resentment against women. Back in 2018 I was driven into Incel/blackpill ideology after feeling betrayed by pickup/RSD promises. You could say it's funny that @Leo Gura was the one who brought me out of it with his "How to get laid" series, where he explicated that looks don't matter that much to women, yet he is now the one who has came around and admitted the blackpill. I feel deep resentment against women and the men who let them free. Isn't it a fact women are hypergamous as hell and reward society being a battlefield of looks, money and status, where corruption and lies blossom, and most men end up with nothing? I know I sound like an incel, but isn't this the empirical truth of what we are now witnessing? A culling of the weak, ugly and poor? I know women don't make this decision out of evil, it is just survival. And who am I to talk, I'm evil myself. Yet isn't it obvious that this system of freedom of sex will lead to so much more death and despair than stricter family systems and arranged marriage? Or at least a culture where those things are seen as good? I feel so fucking ashamed that my parents were able to do what I will never do. Why do women get to slut themselves out with 30 guys before settling down? Isn't it obvious by intuition that this breaks down society, causing men and women to fail their parents and become wretched corrupt creatures, looking only to fulfill their carnal desires? The thoughts of failing my parents, the thought of their despair after my death is the only thing keeping me from doing it - beside a vague dream of making art about the Love that I have seen beyond the sickness of this world, yet even in it. But my despair is growing and my corrupt, broken hateful self is there evermore. The devil whispers to me almost literally, telling me to follow him into the mountains and throw myself off. I know life is eternal and that there is nothing but my consciousness in the end. The devil is promising me that life will be my creation, a life with desires fulfilled at last. Or I dream of war, of going out to the battlefield so that I can at least die a manly death. With the wars starting and raging these last months that desire has grown bigger. Beside venting, since I have nobody to talk about this to, the reason I'm writing this to you, @Miguel1, is to ask you to contemplate about your freedom of these karmic loops. I think the fact that you are even able to make this growth to the upper levels of life and development, and maybe even sagehood is rested on your foundation of experience of the lower levels. You have gotten laid and were loved and desired. This is no small feat. A lot of this was attributed by your looks and other dispositions. Yet of course you have done a good job yourself and made the proper decisions to pursue Consciousness and selflessness. Kudos to you and I hope you become a sage. If Leo sees your growth that is a good sign since he is a radical ascetic when it comes to a lot of bullshit. Just please don't forget the devils like me, stuck in the loops. Sure, maybe I could make it out with some work and create a niche as a hermit somewhere living by the sea, in a house all alone, and reach sagehood that way. Socially i would still be underdeveloped, but it would probably be possible if the economics allowed for it. But to be completely honest I'd rather die. This is not to sound dramatic but to showcase the effect resentment, anger, unfulfilled desire, lack of love and lack of agency in life can do to you. My desire for women and being a man worthy of them is so deep, my self-loathing so vicious. I have given up that my condition will change. But something will change sooner or later, whether I follow the devil or God. I hope all are forgiven.

Hearing @Leo Gura talk about metaphysics is like hearing a 5th dimensional demigod talk about metaphysics. Hearing him talk about music is like hearing a profoundly retarded and spoiled 14 year old atheist talking about philosophy. First of all, there is no melody without rhythm, but there is rhythm without melody. "What's most important is what sells the song." Second of all, the way you talk about these matters is deeply unsettling. Like music is just some "beat" to sell like a pack of chicken breast. That you're going along with the cynical capitalist reasoning these labels exploited is insane. You were the one to lead me to the realization that artistry and art is an absolute facet of God and now you say shit like this. To look at music in such a retardedly simplified way is a betrayal to your own cause, Leo. There exists music that is almost entirely rhythmical and music that is almost entirely melodic. if you truly appreciate art you'd realize this and the profoundness of this without having to enjoy such music.

Yeah I guess. Yet I do understand it, but my ego has resorted to other tricks to keep me in the illusion.

Aha, so you still qualify Absolute evil as being imagined by and therefore emanating from the absolute Good. However this brings up strange paradoxes. You qualify the absolute formless God, the ultimate reality, as being Good. Imagination itself, with nothing behind it, the ultimate bedrock of reality that is entirely self subsisting and not imagined or emanating from anything else. Let's call this the Godhead. You call this formless Godhead, Good, without the same qualification as absolute Evil. The qualification absolute Evil had to become Evil, was to be imagined by the Godhead. However the quality of being Good of the Godhead is intrinsic to the Godhead, right? The Godhead isn't imagining Goodness for itself, it already eternally is without qualifications. Couldn't the Godhead now, imagine in the same way as it imagines absolute Evil, imagine an absolute Good that IS qualified by the Godhead? That would be consistent with the Godheads power, since it imagined absolute Evil, it could also imagine absolute Good. Would this second Good, this emanation from the Godhead, be any different from the Godhead (like some sort of "angelic goodness"), or would the Godhead imagine itself again? Would absolute Evil be in opposition to the Godhead (being everything the Godhead isn't somehow), or in opposition to this "second Good"? Surely absolute Evil is proposed by you to be in opposition to some kind of Good, in the same way darkness is the absence of light. But how can anything be in opposition to the Godhead? wouldn't that be non-existence, pure non-being? How can Absolute Infinity have an opposite? Absolute Blue seems less paradoxical, since it's not in opposition to anything. It's just an Infinity chilling within itself.

Yeah I got more skeptical about it as well. History gets a lot more messy and less proven to me the more i study it.

I guess thats the silver lining to realms of absolute evil existing, that such realms must as well. In the end Leo is just like Mohammed, telling us about God, hell and heaven(where you get to fuck). lol

If it's cope then we have to dismiss the entire myth and even Mohammeds historical existence that you assumed previously. You have weird standards

I disagree with your sneaky relativising of aesthetic principles. Just because God thinks a turd is beautiful doesn't mean that when I take a picture of a turd with my iphone its good art. It's not only about current fashion, but about much deeper psychological trends of the mind, "mesotrends" if you will.

So what would you propose high consciousness people listen to?

Taste is not everything though, although it is the majority of what makes art good. Technique is also crucial, not only for the ability to make art in the first place, but because taste is also in the fingers itself, not just the brain. Your fingers are intelligent and contain their own artistic taste that can never be developed with just mental, non-manual taste development. By spending hours improvising on the piano for example your fingers will be able to create melodies that you could never make up by drawing them on a digital music program for example.

Fair enough, I think I misread what you said.

Can we even call it channeling at that point though? Isn't the idea of a channel that it is to/from something external, like sending a message over the internet, only through psychic means? Why would you still call it channeling? Well, if we're anyway going by the myth, his followers seem to have memorized the entire Quran and spread/wrote it from there. They couldn't have made up extra verses or changed verses since there were so many memorizers, so one alteration would be corrected by many other correct memorizers. (almost exactly like how a blockchain works) Well when people say "wrote" they just mean made up, but ok.

It's only absolute in the sense that its essence is reality/consciousness, but as a finite thing, it's relative. In the same way that a pinky is a human, but what constitutes a human is not just a pinky.

Isn't it that the Absolute is either formless nothingness or an Infinity of forms(The entire infinite set of all forms), but never a single, distinct thing? How could there be an Absolute Blue? However it's crazy you mentioned that because one time on a psych trip, I closed my eyes and it kept getting more blue and more blue until I couldn't handle it anymore (and I opened my eyes) and it felt crazy that It could even get more blue than what I normally would imagine as pure blue.

Isn't there only one formless abstraction; Infinity itself? how can a formless abstraction have the "Form" of evil? You have classified God as Infinite Good(and not evil). Would God/Good be stronger than Evil, or do you propose a Zoroastrian style of metaphysics where they are in a perfect balance for eternity?

I've been hoping you'd get into that realm. How could it ever be Absolute though? how could a specific hellrealm or an individual demon be Absolute evil? you could always think up something more evil than that, so it must be finite/relative. Just like a heaven filled with doves, bliss and/or maidens wouldn't be the Absolute Good. Cool.

such American customs are so deeply, unnervingly unaesthetic to us Europeans.

It's not about the scholarship but about missing crucial details about religions and they affect society and understanding of God. But I digress. I wanted to ask you, why do you believe Mohammed's claims that his insights were channeled? why wasn't it just made up from his own insight? and if it was channeled, why does it contain so much falsehood, like you claim, yet also much truth, like you also claim? How do you think channeling works, do you think there's actual distinct spiritual entities out there doing the work, or a more nebulous channeling from infinite intelligence? if the latter, why would there be so much falsehood in channeled teachings like that? because the time isnt ready for it?

I'd argue it is actually more complicated than that since many times, you have to do things like killing in war to protect your family. Are you going to argue against Ukrainian soldiers that they have to be conscious and loving, or that they have to kill and destroy the enemy? which is more moral? Was Gautama Buddha moral for abandoning his wife and infant child forever in search of Truth? Or is it more moral to sacrifice truth-seeking for selfless activities like caring for your family, but being stuck in societies falsehood till you die? You are reducing morality to what is good between people, when morality is more than that, it is about what the good life is. You have an unconscious assumption of what Nietszche would call slave morality, it's what we have been brought up with in our liberal time. I'd invite you to contemplate that morality is more complex and deep than you reduce it out to be.