poimandres

How old are you man? And what is the rush to get married? If you want to grow from this experience, introspect on what was posted above about your codependency, loosing your center, etc..

Never heard of them. I have a sense you are searching for some answers. Do you have any questions that someone's here maybe able to offer some insight before dropping money on books?

Seems like you are trying to win over some one -- this is not how it works. Explore yourself first. Find out what makes you tick at your core. I was always lacking confidence in myself thinking what woman is going to like an IT guy who reads a bunch of philosophy and hates sports -- totally the opposite of a masculine guy.. By putting on a front of trying to impress your date, will bring the opposite effect that you might think. Hence, she's bored. That which is chased, runs away. There are multiple levels to communication, body language, tone of voice, word selection (i.e. flirting), etc, all of which has an instant impact (on first and lasting impressions) of the person who is on the receiving end of that communication (even non verbal, or you haven't even spoken a word to them yet). Have you worked on your appearance? Taken care of yourself? Become solid in what you KNOW makes you tick. If it's sports, it's sports, if it's philosophy, it's philosophy. It's not what your interests are that will impress some one, it's your lack of neediness and being grounded in yourself. A wit will help you get sex, but ultimately, confidence trumps all (strong silent types get sex as well).

I have done 2 floats, both were about 45 min a piece (I can't seem to stay in longer than that). I loved it. Each time I emerged back out, I realized how much distraction there is in the world.

Hey @Huz88, I have found that forced conversation is less genuine and even more awkward that silences. Have you tried overcoming this by chatting up random strangers at a bar? What if you tried treating your approach as a social experiment instead of overcoming your anxiety? What I mean by this, is there is no wrong in what I'm about to describe (you can't fail or say the "wrong thing"). Go into a restaurant that has a bar, not like a pool hall but a place where it's like a nice vibe to the place -- sushi restaurant at happy hour, sit one chair away from someone, and start a conversation like "What is good here? I've been here 100 times (or this is my first time here) and I'm in the mood for something different. What did you order?" And after that, see where the other person carries the conversation. If they continue to ask you further questions like "Are you from around here?", then proceed to carry on the conversation. If they drop the conversation, let them drop it. Let the burden of carrying the conversation be on them during your experiment. There should be no burden for you to carry a conversation.